0cm:
	yellow eyes ~1.0cm ea
100th:
	100th episode! wowie!
12th:
	- i swear, why anyone would want a toy of the 12th president is beyond me.
1800s:
	 two women in 1800s vintage dresses whom we will call lily (standing) and ruth (sitting).
1910s:
	a young woman is happily chatting away on her 1910s-style bakelite cell phone while three other people are lined up behind her, including a bearded soldier.
1980s:
	harry  that's right.  if you wanna watch tv, you can watch dvds of 1980s sesame street, before it got all pc.
1k:
	requests 81 requests to go away 34 empty treehouses 103 carbon whatevers 830 already aw man 411 some kinda cannon 3 french hens 26¢ per 1k impressions go read a book
1st:
	 pfc. pierce heroically hid in a trench while his legs were located by members of the 1st infantry
280z:
	 i have taken the liberty of dismantling your 1978 datsun 280z
280zx:
	anticipating that this might happen, we were careful to build the chronoship out of parts from a 1981 datsun 280zx.
28th:
	john  the two-bedroom up on 28th had cookies that tasted homemade.
351351j:
	351351j  innovation is sudden
3cm:
	approx. 3cm intervals
5x:
	the man looks suspicious. the salesman's head grows even larger - it is now perhaps 1.5x taller than the man's. he looks very angry and his mouth grows into a huge, gaping frown - he could easily swallow the other man's head.
8th:
	 josh was middleweight boxing champ in nazareth in 8th grade. not many people know that
90s:
	ruth i know, but hating him seems so easy. he's a sneering beanpole on grainy videotapes with a watermelon-shaped beard! all he needs is a cackling ferret sidekick to be a mid-'90s disney villain!
____:
	 don't worry it wasn't a ____* baby (*your race, religion, ethnicity or other subgroup)
_ere__:
	closeup of a crossword puzzle.  21 down and 39 across are incomplete, showing _ere__ and eae_ea, respectively.
aaaaaa:
	baby aaaaaa
aaaaahh:
	men in distance  aaaaahh
aaaaahhh:
	dodos aaaaahhh! now we have the time
aaahhhh:
	larry aaahhhh
aaahhhhh:
	larry aaahhhhh
aaahhhhhh:
	louie aaahhhhhh   caffeine withdrawal headache
aaahhhhhhh:
	father aaahhhhhhh
aaarrgghhhh:
	gwendolyn aaarrgghhhh
aaarrrgghhhh:
	alex (quietly dying a thousand deaths)  aaarrrgghhhh
aagggkkkk:
	 we mere fooles delight in bringing whimsy and magic to the aagggkkkk
aaggh:
	teddy (peering through his spyglass) aaggh what in blazes is this nonsense?
aahh:
	evie thinking wait, no?i got rid of those last year to make room for the baby knives.  the baby knives!  so hard to explain!  aahh!
aarrgghhh:
	- it just goes right in here - aah! it's got my tie! aarrgghhh!
aawww:
	vikings aawww
abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz:
	jordan (typing) abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz
abernathy:
	 you should hear how he went on when he met the new mailroom guy, abernathy mercutio hoakes-waddleswourthe iv
aberrant:
	chuck  but everything today is so aberrant.  our food has no nutrition.  our kids are hyperallergic.  everyone's on psychiatric drugs.
aberration:
	anastasia nobody's ever satisfied with their own work.  nobody mature, anyway.  you're not some freakish aberration, you're just normal.
abide:
	fernando i'm a man of action.  i can't abide all this talk.  i want stuff to happen.
abiding:
	and the weirdest part was--when i woke up, that deep and abiding hatred was legitimately gone!
abnormality:
	ron do you think everyone has the same number of hair follicles?  on the face of it, you'd think of course not.  some people are way hairier than others.  but are they?  or is their hair just thicker and coarser?  even bald people have hair follicles, it's just that fewer of them are active.  i mean, why wouldn't we all have the same number of follicles?  we have the same number of fingers.  i know, i know - some people don't have the same number of fingers.  but that's abnormal.  but - jeez, maybe there's a high rate of abnormality with hair, too.   with so many follicles, the chances of minor mutation during development are very high.  meaning, even if there were some theoretical "ideal" number of follicles, chances are slim that anybody would match that number.  so if there were an ideal number, would we even know?
aboard:
	754754; all aboard the snooze express
abode:
	exterior a quaint rural abode.
abomination:
	personal emails are an abomination unto my sight.
abort:
	woman oh, no, it's ok.  i'm gonna abort it anyway.
aborted:
	116116;  an experiment is aborted
abroad:
	- in 1882 while vacationing abroad, lord alistair bludd-smythe invented the "blumpkin", the "rusty steamer", the "dirty sanchez", the "steaming dragon", and the "grumpy munchkin", all which remain popular to this very day!
absent:
	  the bird was hoping for a little piece of crouton or something, but absent that, will happily take that hat.
absorb:
	- now absorb the energy we send you. take it in.
absorbed:
	the other man is still absorbed in his book, unaffected
abstruse:
	abstruse depiction of a hand putting some sort of ring on a cylinder thing with a flared end
abused:
	138138;  office is abused
abusers:
	todd at long last, the only remaining survivors of the '96 plague class?  accidental astronauts?  deaf in the same ear?  child abusers?  each other's dentist?
abuses:
	woman  everyone's talking about how these things should have been *predicted*, should have been *stopped*.  seems so obvious in hindsight.  so what regulations are going unenforced *right this second*?  what abuses are people *noticing* but not mentioning?  what crises yet to come are still *preventable*?
abyss:
	 gaze into the abyss at 
academia:
	professor i first made the acquaintance of young master malki ! when he came under my tutelage at oxford -- introduction to mad biochemistry, as i recall. frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. "malki !, my lad," i told him on more than one occasion, "if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then i fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world." but some boys just refuse to listen.
accelerate:
	 accelerate 
accelerated:
	chester i did look into it, but i couldn't find a school that offered the one-week accelerated course i wanted.
accelerator:
	sick  by day, i lay on the ground moaning and rocking in agony... by night, i stared at the ceiling, willing sleep to come, begging some spirit of rest to glance over my shattered body and, sighing, say "i'll take him." after hours of this i would look at the clock and realize only minutes had passed. time had lifted its foot from the accelerator and was slowly coasting to a stop. i would be trapped in that pain for a hundred thousand years.
accepts:
	 nobody ever accepts starter checks.  so really, what's the point?
accidental:
	todd at long last, the only remaining survivors of the '96 plague class?  accidental astronauts?  deaf in the same ear?  child abusers?  each other's dentist?
accidents:
	- accidents happen.
accommodate:
	ken i - i do admit that the model cannot accommodate a divide-by-zero error
accompanied:
	now the guy, still with the newspaper, is accompanied by a big dinosaur-looking thing.
accomplice:
	  s.a.m.i.r. the helpful clockwork boy in  "the accomplice"
accomplish:
	man #1 they fired my entire data-analysis team and replaced them with day laborers from outside home depot. it is now mathematically impossible to accomplish anything at work.
accordance:
	  in accordance with 
accounting:
	771771; accounting by network
accreditation:
	chester i just brought the certificate over from my garage.  oh, which is now an agency of accreditation.
accuracy:
	 technically the roman saturnalia and the pagan solstice festival were separate and both co-opted by christianity centuries apart but whatever, historical accuracy
accusation:
	customer what a preposterous accusation! ask the dog itself.
accusations:
	sig seems what?  i am discriminated against enough without your petty accusations on top of it all!
accuse:
	 j'accuse 
ache:
	 bones ache 
achieve:
	 furthermore, i am appalled that anyone would require chemical aids to achieve euphoria
achieves:
	523523;  vince achieves victory
achilles:
	534534; the achilles body
achingly:
	geno your fingers are like sponges.  so weak.  so terribly, achingly, tremblingly weak.
acknowledge:
	nice  well, first i acknowledge their experience, rather than minimizing or dismissing it. most people just want to be heard. i listen to them, and they calm down.
acknowledged:
	007007;  inequality is acknowledged
acoustic:
	man 1 anyway, sometime between then and monday morning he somehow got himself an acoustic guitar and a myspace account.
acquaintance:
	professor i first made the acquaintance of young master malki ! when he came under my tutelage at oxford -- introduction to mad biochemistry, as i recall. frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. "malki !, my lad," i told him on more than one occasion, "if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then i fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world." but some boys just refuse to listen.
acquaintances:
	they are acquaintances i am trying to get in good with so they will recommend me for an opening at their company.  a position which will be marginally less maddening than working for y--
acquire:
	 i also have a bewitched nose and a hexed earlobe.  at my age you just sort of acquire these things.
acquires:
	coal in the home. the family in question had attached turbine-boilers to every device in the home toasters, refrigerators, can-openers &c. what reports fail to mention is that the lady of the house works in a factory where the small boilers are manufactured. she acquires them at a steep discount. this is clearly out of range for the average family.
acrostic:
	but i made a mnemonic for it, acrostic-style.
acrylic:
	terry "i even got so far as taking the test.  but it turns out i don't have any taste buds."  "i am made of injection-molded plastic slapped with acrylic paint and cheap decals to appear alive."
actin:
	rhonda you listen close i make all the toys.  i give them out to boys and girls everywhere.  i watch 'em all closely to see who's eaten' their greens and who's actin' out.  me.  and i put in fifty hours a week at the windshield place.  that part you know about.  now you know why i'm so tired.  that settle it?  no more questions?
actions:
	hugo but whenever some external force, such as the state, commands us under penalty to to do or not do certain things - isn't that negating our personal choice to do or not do that thing?  in other words, removing our free will.  and isn't free will and moral agency the defining characteristic of humanity?  thus, i must reject any "law" that prescribes my actions as incompatible with my very nature as a reasoning being!
activated:
	desmond my first project will be refurb'ing the pond to feature waterproof, motion-activated bread-crumb dispensers.  these will work in concert with a mandatory neighborhood old-muffin recycling program.
actor:
	you're still sending out my headshot for dramatic roles, right?  i mean, i came out here to be a serious actor.
actuality:
	 in actuality, dude just likes sausage.  what is so wrong with that?
actualization:
	gibson girl  great--so let me show you the wilfred q. & barbara k. waddlesworth-stoates retreat for academic contemplation & personal self-actualization!
actuated:
	inventor four independently-actuated ground-contacting sub-shoes. brushless gear assembly with hot-swappable drive bearings. double camshaft connected to a fully magnetic differential.
acumen:
	tad  but you have absolutely no engineering knowhow, seed capital, or business acumen whatsoever!
adams:
	official once your name is announced, you'll cross the podium and stand next to adams.
adaptive:
	 it's tremendously complex and adaptive. it's never the same game twice!
additionally:
	 additionally, my frosted whipped beverage summons lads to my garden
additions:
	i get that a red nose makes for a good toy...but you can't just make willy-nilly additions to santa's official roster!
adhere:
	 adhere to 
adjectives:
	researcher which of these adjectives would you use to describe the queen? likeable, cool, enjoyable, funny, exciting, impressive, relatable?
adjustable:
	a chair is displayed, captioned "reading position." the wilson patent adjustable chair with ninety-six possible positions, you will never find the perfect one for you, and if you do, you will not be able to find it again. send for circular. wilson's, 34 park st.
adjusting:
	a woman is shown wearing a corset. dr. warner's health corset, with skirt supporter and self-adjusting pads, is on sale now. only one available - this is dr. warner's actual personal item. it took a while but i finally gained her trust. her loss is your bargain! smells like doctor. 351 broadway, n.y.
admin123:
	mickey  'admin123.'
administer:
	 fancy implements are expensive and hey, you knew what you were getting into when you agreed to administer your own anesthesia.
administered:
	instead of dollars, it's paid in excruciating groin-kicks, administered by hugo here.
administration:
	candidate it will be an administration of scandal.
admiration:
	 eleven is just 'passive admiration'
admire:
	"no. we're kept at arm's length by the kabuki of politeness. we have to roleplay as people who aren't invisible connected, pretending we actually don't know everything we know. and for what? so we can talk about the weather with someone we deeply admire?"
admiring:
	two men admiring a horseless carriage.
admissible:
	amos how is that even admissible
admission:
	winston is the narrator fed up with the subject's behavior?  if so, the whole song's an admission of impotence.
admits:
	king so the criminal even admits his heinous offense!
adolescents:
	 <<sigh>> i'm getting tired of having to explain this every time. a pedophile is attracted to pre-pubescent children. (eww.) i'm a hebephile. i'm attracted to adolescents. there is a significant difference.
adopt:
	will you do it, barnes?  will you adopt her for me?  and feed her, and brush her, and tend to her costly, myriad and unusual medical needs?
adrift:
	jasper  the internet was once made of computers, not goats lashed together with fiber-optic cables and set adrift in the oceans!
adult:
	- depends, like it depends, or depends, like the adult diaper?
adulthood:
	jeremy  sure.  all our makeup.  i mean, you and i didn't meet until adulthood, but thanks to ubiquitous mass media, we had a shared childhood nonetheless.
adventure:
	edwina but guess what?  i want something more.  so put the book down, randy.  we're gonna go have an adventure.
adventures:
	caption  the adventures of the superhero whose left ear is bulletproof
advertisements:
	a large page contains several advertisements. a banner at the top proclaims "you need all of it" "please be so kind as to agree"
advertisers:
	 tooth magazine folded in '89 when advertisers withdrew their support following the publishing of a controversial illustration featuring c. everett koop driving a bulldozer through tianenmen square. the caption 'fluoride uber alles'
advised:
	- the cops advised me to press charges. i said no, he's goofy, but i love him.
aero:
	your title is "the { chrono, neuro, aero, cosmo, reve, necro, cyber, astro, psycho, steam, meta, black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, war} s."
aeroplanes:
	large bug with pincers in foreground, city in turmoil in background, aeroplanes, miniature automobile
aesthetician:
	ken i take pride in my haircuts!  i want to get good value from them!  i'm not a mathematician, robert!  i barely an aesthetician.  but now i'm ruining people's lives!  i inverted a fraction and people are dying.  they're dying in the streets!  i don't know how to stop it!  i don't know how to make it right!
afar:
	from afar, bob watches the two of them, with wide, creepy eyes.
affair:
	are we talking mountain-vaulting altitudes or is it more a graze-the-steeples type of affair?
affixed:
	a horn is mounted on a stand.  a large placard affixed to the stand reads blow me.
afflicted:
	a picture is shown that says "dr. johnson's $30 health-lift." if you suffer from palsy, we will treat you. if you are afflicted with pox, we will address you. even if you are right now dying of tuberculosis, call us. will you be healed? almost certainly not. but we will talk with you so you're not lonely. (as we are.)
affords:
	grandfather  but declaring a religion hems you into declaring beliefs.  and it's much easier to just leave that door open by claiming to be 'spiritual'.  the free pass that affords for your smug little know-it-all libido is just gravy.  
affront:
	what affront do we need to brace ourselves for?
afire:
	 my wife oogbgha has a recipe that will set your very veins afire
africa:
	404404  africa is noticed
afterlife:
	the afterlife.  rene, a soldier, stands watch.
afternoons:
	 fine, simon.  we'll also pitch 'don't you deserve a day off?  indulge yourself with plaque-vac!  take whole lazy afternoons to pamper your gums.'
afterward:
	gustavo i'm sorry, sir, your card was declined. / todd that's impossible!  are you certain? / gustavo absolutely, sir.  it was the rare super decline.  the machine asked us to rinse it down with alcohol afterward.
agave:
	helene ha ha!  oh no, sir.  it's lightly sweetened with distilled agave nectar, so its great for your diet and your sweet tooth!
agck:
	jules agck
agggh:
	meg  agggh.  super sour.
aggh:
	pat aggh!   it's, like, november already!  i haven't accomplished anything this year!
aggravated:
	- let's see, what did the charge end up being... three counts of aggravated dental sodomy and conspiracy to commit buggery. also, one count of treason. i was young and stupid.
aggressively:
	089089;  a host acts passive-aggressively
agitated:
	  next comes the agitated, spittle-flinging air-boxing
aglow:
	 things aglow at 
agog:
	talia  oh, beyond ready.  into agog.
agrarian:
	king the bylaws of our experimental agrarian city-state expressly prohibit mischievous tampering with the natural order of living things!
agreed:
	 fancy implements are expensive and hey, you knew what you were getting into when you agreed to administer your own anesthesia.
ahhah:
	whyte  ahhah!
ahhhhh:
	 robots! / ahhhhh!!!
ahleejanz:
	woman 2 ayplej ahleejanz tooda flahg uvdaa yooneye teydstay tsava merraka
ahyah:
	- ahyah gannah havvah obbawayt?
aided:
	 aided by 
aieee:
	- aieee!!!
aim:
	grandpa what is the aim of this record
aimed:
	wind us up and set us loose - aimed at the world
aimless:
	hermes  should i applaud your aimless tinkering?  what problem did you solve?
aimlessly:
	a bear in an ill-fitting prussian military helmet prowls about aimlessly.
aims:
	marcus  very well.  a fine consul you have proven to be, benson.  we shall retire, this day, and reconsider our aims.
airborne:
	 recognizable smells are specific combinations of airborne molecules called odorants. odorants are chemical vapors which must permeate a mucous membrane to bond with olfactory receptors.
aircraft:
	coin-purse gun.  a weapon to keep handy at all times of day or night.  fend off bothersome insects without danger of injury to others.  provoke comforting touches before boarding aircraft.  $2.00
airplane:
	- excuse me, sisters, but my airplane seems to -
airplay:
	but that probably didn't get a lot of airplay around where you grew up.
airship:
	an airship swings wildly from its gas bag.
airspace:
	six papa romeo desert tower, biplane six papa romeo requests eastbound transition your airspace at five thousand five hundred.
airy:
	an airy, well-lit club dining room. two gentlemen of stately bearing are standing in the foreground.
aka:
	mykelle, aka mizike  but everybody's getting their skull drilled out and filled with expansion foam!  it means you're not a dweeborg!
akimbo:
	two aliens with long spiky feathers crowning their bird-style feathered heads address a middle-aged woman with her hair pulled back severely, dressed in a long-sleeved dark dress with an apron.  she is holding a round serving tray in her right hand, angled against her body, and has her left arm akimbo. she responds to them in a matter-of-fact yet kindly manner.
alabama:
	gladys sweet home alabama!
alabaster:
	 one more glimpse of that alabaster flesh stirs in me a fever i'd but dreampt of on the boldest of painkillers.
alarmed:
	ape  do not be alarmed!  i am from your future!
alas:
	caption  alas
alaska:
	you're from alaska, huh?
albania:
	bernie  with only forty-three presidents, it's not terribly hard fo any one of them to be the first at something obscure.  clinton was the first baby boomer president.  george w. was the first to visit albania.
albeit:
	 supposedly the cucumber is the only food that contains every necessary nutrient, albeit in trace amounts for some. so if you're going to restrict yourself to a single food, twenty pounds of cucumbers is a reasonably smart choice.
album:
	 i left the album right here on my desk so i could show everyone later - how in the world could it have gotten caught in the shredder
albumen:
	simon, who will...  free-range hen eggs delicately cracked into a porcelain bowl, the yolk and albumen whipped until smooth with a silver whisk, then seared on a steaming griddle until golden and fluffy.
albums:
	 can you name any james brown albums? any songs, even?
alchemy:
	 would you still love me if this nightmare became real tonight, susan? if the moon and the stars and my birthday just happened to combine in an awful, irresistible alchemy?
alcoholic:
	a man is bringing a plump woman a box of alcoholic beverages.
alcoholism:
	264264;  alcoholism factors
aleck:
	rhonda sammy!  i heard you had some smart-aleck questions about santa!
alerted:
	647647;  a spoiler is alerted
alexander:
	 on the bright side, the blood transfusion i got was made up of atoms that were probably once alexander the great!
alfalfa:
	- oh, you know. gnawing out burrs, the occasional alfalfa gorging. you?
alfie:
	alfie i just got a call from the auditors!  our spreadsheets are a total mess!
algae:
	horse  he's not breathing.  his skin is cold and puckered.  he smells like algae and meat-rot.
alice:
	they pass alice, wearing a man's 3-piece suit.
alicia:
	alicia so did you steal them watermelons?
alight:
	 i felt a chill as the ghost swept through me to alight on the distributor cap.  "there is corrosion," it hissed in a voice blasted for centuries by the immortal furnaces of hades, "on the spark plug wire contacts."
alignment:
	woman or do you simply take action however you please, rationalizing your worldview into alignment?
alistair:
	- in 1882 while vacationing abroad, lord alistair bludd-smythe invented the "blumpkin", the "rusty steamer", the "dirty sanchez", the "steaming dragon", and the "grumpy munchkin", all which remain popular to this very day!
alistano:
	left i got it in from alistano down at the dog creamery. bifton got pinked by jornavenich!
alkalinized:
	gax  i bleached my sheets every morning, re-alkalinized the toilets after i used them, replaced any pets i ate...
allays:
	347347;  reginald allays various concerns
alleged:
	reference to mel gibson's alleged comment that jews are responsible for all the wars in the world.
allegedly:
	reference to what mel gibson allegedly called the female police officer who apprehended him for drunk driving.
allegory:
	 the story is entitled 'a bear and his comically-large fedora go to disneyland a heavy-handed allegory about the war in afghanistan'
allele:
	 genetic inheritance! a tricky subject! the transmission disequillibrium test is one way to measure the over-transmission of an allele from heterozygous parents to affected offspring!
allergies:
	now think about his allergies.
alles:
	 tooth magazine folded in '89 when advertisers withdrew their support following the publishing of a controversial illustration featuring c. everett koop driving a bulldozer through tianenmen square. the caption 'fluoride uber alles'
alleviate:
	richard charlotte, you don't understand!  this is the next telephone or model t - the next game-changer for humanity!  imagine, a device that can not only detect human suffering - but knows how best to alleviate it!  it could make us -
alliteration:
	ray's understudy is a duck.  wearing shoes, pants held up with suspenders and a top hat.  let's call him desmond, for the alliteration.
allo:
	waiter  allo sir.
allocated:
	katie okay, c'mon, sample ballot page eight propositions.  shall the state chapter be amended and ordinance adopted to fund a bond measure allocated for infrastructural repairs?
alloys:
	bethany no wait okay so what i did bring was everything else in that drawer so everybody should just grab a fork and we can play "testing for alloys!"
alluring:
	  i don't know why antonio thought that confession would make him less alluring.
allyou:
	- hey! what's so funny, huh? can't a guy take a shower in peace without allyou yapping away?
almighty:
	god almighty, the lord of hosts, the king of kings, speaks to a room full of office workers.
aloud:
	wilbur (aloud)  when you shoot me full of arrows, i feel like we aren't contributing equally to the health of this relationshaaaooww
alphabet:
	grace  but it's the same tune!  just like twinkle twinkle little star is the same as the alphabet song!
alright:
	 hey, uh... you feelin' alright?
alternate:
	in a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, vr-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | america, japan, soviet russia, victorian britain, medieval europe, aztec empire, atlantis, terraformed mars, antarctica, one-way spaceflight, outer rim world, set from road warrior,
alternately:
	 alternately, it is a zeppelin full of rancid milk
alternator:
	umberto it was probably their alternator belt.  maybe a wheel bearing.
altimeter:
	tower six papa romeo, transition approved, desert altimeter three zero zero one.
altitude:
	thad gains altitude as the blades spin faster.
altitudes:
	are we talking mountain-vaulting altitudes or is it more a graze-the-steeples type of affair?
altruism:
	597 [wondermark ? archive ? #597; an act of altruism
alumni:
	jeeves  let's see...dentist, car insurance, income tax preparer, alumni association.
amass:
	  we amass information mainly to keep it from our competitors.
amateur:
	- as interesting as your amateur analysis may be, it fails in one important respect it does not, in fact, produce pie. for me to eat.
amazon:
	violet nah, i'm just gonna get her an amazon gift card.
ambassador:
	- mr. secretary, the chinese ambassador is still awaiting your decision.
ambassadors:
	- those invisible death-ships are trigger-happy, man. i want those ambassadors wined and dined and bought whatever they want. / the rich can get rich and stay rich and get even richer so long as they stay a step ahead of the expensive tastes of the monsters who hold the planet's survival in their volatile claws!
amber:
	second woman you... you seem to be covered in a dingy yellow, a sort of amber, like -
ambition:
	inventor the realization of a lifelong ambition!
amended:
	katie okay, c'mon, sample ballot page eight propositions.  shall the state chapter be amended and ordinance adopted to fund a bond measure allocated for infrastructural repairs?
americas:
	josh look, whatever he was trying to do, he ended up subjugating the native peoples and opening the door for european exploitation of the americas!
amid:
	bruce singing, dancing amid pigs swinging from chains  we chant the night away and
amin:
	- how about genghis khan swanson.  idi amin swanson.  james k. polk swanson.  rudolf diesel swanson.
amniotic:
	- amniotic fluid is always nasty.
amortize:
	ken [still narrating] but if i spend forty dollars on a primo haircut that'll look good for two months, that has an h.v.i. of point six five.  when you amortize the cost over how long you'll look sharp, it's not so expensive after all!
amourous:
	063063;  amourous intent factors
amping:
	jason try amping up the sincerity.  else i may dash my worthless body on the rocks!
amusement:
	621621; the challenging amusement
anachronisms:
	malki ! our scientists and technicians toil 'round the clock, honing the anachronisms and incongruities that have become synonymous with "wondermark."
anachronistic:
	in a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, vr-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | america, japan, soviet russia, victorian britain, medieval europe, aztec empire, atlantis, terraformed mars, antarctica, one-way spaceflight, outer rim world, set from road warrior,
analyze:
	woman you're a smart guy. you can analyze the situation. deduce how to act natural.
ancestor:
	i swear, getting you to move is like a lame, one-legged ancestor of a sloth who's twice as slow trying to use a frayed old piece of crunchy vine to pull a cruise ship!
anchorage:
	thea but let's just face facts.  there are just not enough jousters in anchorage.  why did we stress ourselves out about this stupid tournament?  why do we constantly make life difficult on purpose?
anchoring:
	 they form a long red line anchoring nightmares to the core of the earth.  i thought it would be a good trade
andu:
	andu i cannot figure out this metaphor
anesthesia:
	 fancy implements are expensive and hey, you knew what you were getting into when you agreed to administer your own anesthesia.
anesthetizing:
	j‹rgen (anesthetizing a patient) can we please talk about this another time
aneurysm:
	by noon his entire debtor roster is casually milling around his house, hoping to "accidentally" encounter him before he has an aneurysm.
anew:
	father each day you must reassert your primacy anew over your own destiny. and all the while, your body will daily discover new and horrid frailties in its slow, inexorable march towards death.
angeles:
	 in los angeles, where i live, there seem to have been a lot of people whose dire need for employment somehow trumped the city engineer's need for people who actually knew how to design highway interchanges
anger:
	431431;  a plate drives parker to anger
angled:
	two aliens with long spiky feathers crowning their bird-style feathered heads address a middle-aged woman with her hair pulled back severely, dressed in a long-sleeved dark dress with an apron.  she is holding a round serving tray in her right hand, angled against her body, and has her left arm akimbo. she responds to them in a matter-of-fact yet kindly manner.
angles:
	 'the most comprehensive encyclopaedia ever will surely need six different close-ups from various angles'
angling:
	gustave i see a slim figure, tight jeans, shaggy hair, sort of a pleasant boyishness - so i'm angling for a closer look -  and whoops!  it's a guy, wearing chuck taylors and listening to arcade fire.
angrily:
	a bear in an ill-fitting hat stalks away angrily.
angus:
	angus just out of curiosity, is there a reason why fares are calculated based on elevenths of a mile?
animate:
	alf a facile comparison!  baseball is a competition, and we expect the pitcher to also be partially successful.  you have no such excuse.  your horn is a thing of brass.  it is not fighting you.  despite what you insist, it is not some animate demon spirit hell-bent on sabotaging your every effort.
ankle:
	julian yeah, now i gotta wear this stupid thing on my ankle.
anna:
	  anna wintour templed her perfect fingers.  'now,' she hissed, 'we wait.'
annihilation:
	- you really believe that the super-rich are protecting the rest of us from intergalactic annihilation?
anniversary:
	232232;  is marked an anniversary of birth
annjus:
	womans 2 inda vizabul witlibberdey annjus tisferol
announcement:
	756756; the insistent announcement
annoyed:
	gax to an incinerated, and annoyed, rob i did not specify what kind of luck.
annually:
	carlos on mexico, creatures are segregated by horn quality into inviolable casts that annually rotate civic duties,  right now twosies are the lawyers, threesies the bakers, and ninesies like us are the astronauts.
anonymity:
	and may our souls commune as we explore the deep recesses of each other in the sanctity and anonymity of march moonlight!
anothe:
	anothe hand casts the shadow of a duck.
answers:
	jamaal  i guess that answers my next question, about the m*a*s*h marathon.
antarctica:
	in a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, vr-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | america, japan, soviet russia, victorian britain, medieval europe, aztec empire, atlantis, terraformed mars, antarctica, one-way spaceflight, outer rim world, set from road warrior,
ante:
	 ante up 
antennas:
	deanna so we found some old tv antennas, spray-painted a basketball, and bam!  sputnik.
anthem:
	dr. helfsquiggle are you kidding?  "every rose" basically defined a marginalized generation.  it was like my anthem senior year.
anti:
	man #2 so anti-smokey has now been promoted to...
antichrist:
	mother  that's from when we were sure you were going to grow up to be the antichrist.
antifreeze:
	jazzmin but yesterday, didn't you fall into a puddle of rusty antifreeze?
antihistamines:
	i am talking all kinds of products!  antihistamines.  muzzle masks.  bubble suits.
antiquity:
	 treasures of antiquity
antooda:
	woman 2 antooda reypuh blik fohrwitchi stan
anxieties:
	customer i received it as a gift and sadly i do not believe grandmother kept proper track of the paperwork. what with her advanced age and various pressing anxieties vis-a-vis same.
anxiously:
	this comic is hand-drawn. a knight wanders anxiously through a cave, carrying a torch and a sword. he passes a skeleton bound to the wall.
anyplace:
	  'old country' is defined as 'anyplace where there is a goat in the kitchen'
apartments:
	mr. meanscary  i'm sorry, you're right, i chose to be turned down for seventeen apartments in a row!
aplenty:
	 brie wheels aplenty at 
apocryphal:
	lopez  ...in truth the curse is probably apocryphal.
apoplectic:
	candidate bloggers will wear their fingers to the bone. magazines and newspapers will run extra editions. talk radio will get so apoplectic that cars will be driven off the road by the score.
apparatus:
	  keep a roll in the kitchen!  one in your purse!  even one in the glove compartment.  burrito tape is the only tortilla-repair apparatus you need.
appeals:
	harriet  the constant appeals to fear and ignorance!
appendages:
	woman at left, behind gax, looks on disapprovingly,eyebrows slightly raised, her eyes fixed on the aliens as she hears his reaction.  gax, just left of center, holding his walking stick in his right hand like moses' rod, does not appear any too enthused to see the aliens.  on the right, the two aliens, with bodies like plucked uncooked chickens except with armlike appendages instead of wings, ending in two grotesque long ced fingers, stare fixedly up at gax as he makes his pronouncement.  the bulging eyes of one show dismay; the other looks shocked or startled.
appetite:
	  that's just it!  i'm not!  i'm a complete outsider!  i can't give any interviews.  i can't write an op-ed column.  i can't even blog about it!  whenever these awful things happen, the public's massive appetite for tragedy sucks up every scrap of half-baked "expert opinion" it can find.  but i can never fit my name in anywhere!
appetizing:
	santa santa is very concerned with your cellulose intake!  it's how he tracks you!  i've also brought some pickled marzipan!  its horridness will stimulate your bile ducts and make you smell less appetizing to the stingroaches i have also brought you.  you should start taking their venom in small doses now, while you are still larval.  be cautious!  they are not tame.
appleseed:
	evan oh, i know the whole santa charade is a determined yet pointless falsehood, like johnny appleseed or larry the cable guy.  but the looks on their faces when they thought they'd ruined it for me!  the poor babies were crushed!  i had to save their feelings!
appletini:
	malki ! thank god that's done! higgins, where's my goddamn appletini?! denise, cancel my appointments. and fire higgins.
appliances:
	many municipal power plants already use coal to generate electricity. some enterprising folks have had the clever idea to eliminate the middleman and consume coal directly, using it to power home appliances, vehicles, pets, plants - anything in need of energy. can this be done feasibly and safely? we have investigated, and the answer appears to be no. absolutely not. the notion is ridiculous.
applications:
	applications noise, meat, smug declarations, places i'll never go, hats, bears
applied:
	just because the details of quantum physics are largely unexplained doesn't mean the term can be blithely applied to everything that seems impossible!
applies:
	it's a large, barcoded price tag for $1,869.00, which he applies to the turtle's shell.
appreciated:
	693693;  nothing is appreciated
appreciates:
	 n - no reason, it's just - uh, it's just grape, and you do not look like a guy that appreciates that fakey grape flavor.  i mean it would probably put you off your whole night.  and this is your night.
appreciating:
	 in fact the only thing appreciating at all around here is this honus wagner baseball card *rip to shreds*
apprehended:
	reference to what mel gibson allegedly called the female police officer who apprehended him for drunk driving.
approached:
	a large, bearded man is approached by a small, armored elephant carrying a howdah with four passengers.  perched on the elephant's trunk is a small woman (about two heads tall in relation to the man), proportionate to the men in the howdah.
approacheth:
	the edge of the page approacheth!
approaching:
	scene woman approaching a man, sitting in a chair.  the man has a sign next to him which reads, "hit a dude in the nuts - $5."
approved:
	tower six papa romeo, transition approved, desert altimeter three zero zero one.
approx:
	approx. 3cm intervals
approximated:
	712712; all organs are approximated
approximations:
	the only ideas really able to take root in our culture are short, punchy approximations.
apr:
	promotional apr
arachnid:
	simon hey, have any reporters shown up lately?  tv trucks?  camera vans?  photojournalists who may also be arachnid-based superheroes?  anything like that?
arbitrary:
	bob and the actual date of christmas is arbitrary anyhow.  so we just bumped our celebration from the december solstice up to the march equinox.
arcade:
	gustave i see a slim figure, tight jeans, shaggy hair, sort of a pleasant boyishness - so i'm angling for a closer look -  and whoops!  it's a guy, wearing chuck taylors and listening to arcade fire.
arcane:
	stumbles across a(n) { magic diadem, arcane prophecy, dusty tome, crazy old man, alien artifact, enchanted sword, otherworldly portal, dream-inducing drug, encrypted data feed, time-traveling soldier, exiled angel, talking fish
archers:
	lefty i need everyone to be at high alert.  watch for archers.  watch for scouts.  any questions?
architect:
	lily a human being? it was osama bin laden! mass murderer and architect of global terror!
arctic:
	167167;  communism overtakes the arctic
areas:
	wilbur i think it's more likely that the property values are lower in high-risk areas.  you can afford a trailer in kansas if you're willing to take the risk of living in tornado country.
arfs:
	now, every message archie has is from buster and they're all nothing but arf arf arf arf arf arf, varying only in the number of arfs.  six of these in a two-hour period, with a particularly long one at 41 minutes ago.
argg:
	 ack argg bluh i'm so nervous!
arguably:
	if obama wins, it'll probably be historic for reasons other than his being the fourteenth (after carter, nixon, jefferson, cleveland, both johnsons, tyler, hayes, jackson, madison, grant, wilson and arguably taylor) to feature palindromic vowel-consonant dispersion.
arguments:
	bart turns out i just like formulating arguments!
arise:
	  the problems arise when oversimplified concepts evolve into common knowledge.  then the complicated version--the more accurate version--starts sounding to the public like heresy!
aristocrat:
	in the late 19th century a female lowlands gorilla known as "lady millicent" went from the royal zoo to become the toast of high society before marrying a belgian aristocrat for whom she bore many children.
armada:
	interrogator take the gag from his mouth. i will ask once more. when is the armada coming?
armband:
	clown with black armband (thinks) the funeral home painted you up like a $2 whore.
armlike:
	woman at left, behind gax, looks on disapprovingly,eyebrows slightly raised, her eyes fixed on the aliens as she hears his reaction.  gax, just left of center, holding his walking stick in his right hand like moses' rod, does not appear any too enthused to see the aliens.  on the right, the two aliens, with bodies like plucked uncooked chickens except with armlike appendages instead of wings, ending in two grotesque long ced fingers, stare fixedly up at gax as he makes his pronouncement.  the bulging eyes of one show dismay; the other looks shocked or startled.
armor:
	two girls by a tree; one, in armor, carries a lance, while the other looks bored.
armored:
	a large, bearded man is approached by a small, armored elephant carrying a howdah with four passengers.  perched on the elephant's trunk is a small woman (about two heads tall in relation to the man), proportionate to the men in the howdah.
armrest:
	a mother and her moppet are chatting.  mother is resting in a chaise chair, while moppet is standing beside, sweetly, hands on the armrest.
arnie:
	they gonna make like arnie
aroused:
	658658;  suspicion is aroused
arousing:
	 it actually is a little arousing
arranged:
	seeing folks who might be future-me is reassuring.  it lets me believe that behind the scenes, things are quietly being arranged for my life to progress successfully.
arrghh:
	eel arrghh!  my fondness for biting at glittery things has horribly backfired!   but i am nothing if not a fish of honor.   what's your question?
arrive:
	mabel  or we could wait five more minutes for zach to arrive with our spare keys.
arrived:
	dad  and your brother arrived this morning!  this is gonna be our biggest christmas ever!
arrogant:
	eugene the dollars in jefferson's and ford's times were on the gold standard!  they corresponded to specific lumps of metal in fort knox!  your arrogant attempt to place yourself at the crossroads of history must begin in 1933 at the earliest!
arrrgh:
	tiger  arrrgh no
arsed:
	boss but what if you can't be arsed to care in the least?
arson:
	- twenty on arson!
artery:
	 i shall tap your artery and slake my eternal thirst. then no longer will you walk among the living.
arthritic:
	victor [holding a?pool cue?] have you ever been in a situation that was just a little bit unsettling, just barely enough to get the pit of your stomach seizing up like a fist clenching but only weakly like an arthritic fist
artifact:
	stumbles across a(n) { magic diadem, arcane prophecy, dusty tome, crazy old man, alien artifact, enchanted sword, otherworldly portal, dream-inducing drug, encrypted data feed, time-traveling soldier, exiled angel, talking fish
artifacts:
	i have to feed him safe cultural artifacts from my childhood--the stuff that made me into the decent person i am today.
artificially:
	older  and you feel a sadness, in a way, because the chicken you eat today is factory-farmed, and your teeth are artificially strenghtened by fluoridated water, and you wonder if you would even survive back then...
artisanal:
	 optionally, they can be prepared drizzled with artisanal peppercorn shavings, or sprinkled with crushed crystalline minerals.  zagat take notice
asbestos:
	marc which seemingly harmless substance that we use every day is actually slowly poisoning us?  lead.  asbestos.  teflon.  thalomide.  vioxx.  makes you wonder what's next.  what they haven't figured out is deadly yet.  so i'm just playing it safe.
ascending:
	masked  you were biting it with the mustard side down. when your tongue hits that mustard, it'll overpower every other flavor! you need to bite mustard side up -- so your tongue first goes through the lettuce, meat, and cheese! in ascending order of flavor power! that way, you experience a more balanced palate.
ascerta:
	(2) carve the necessary implements from a piece of dry cordwood (fig. 1). always try the wood before cutting into it, to ascerta way the grain runs. in clear basswood it is usually quite straight, but sometimes it runs at a slight angle. 
ascetic:
	this is zion, o simpleton.  thusly have i christened my sanctuary, my ascetic outpost, which secludes me from all worldly cares.
ashy:
	raymond  does the sound of young laughter fill your throat with the ashy pitch of a great tree burning since the days of noah?
aspects:
	a block at the bottom reads ""--bottom line--", with some aspects of coal-powering your life outlined underneath
aspirin:
	yuri normal human beings built all that stuff without so much as an aspirin.  and sometimes beer instead of water!  how did they manage?  i get a head cold and i can't stand up for more than five minutes!
aspiring:
	and aspiring to some mythical "normality" is holding us back from dealing with our problems on their own terms.
ass:
	 there must be a gentleman's agreement between envelope manufacturers to make their glues taste uniformly like ass
assassinate:
	phoebe  first i will assassinate a king.
assassination:
	041041;  assassination is plotted
assert:
	 assert yourself to 
asses:
	 well gentlemen, this is the wave of the future to keep all your asses busy!
assessment:
	seamus  your assessment smacks of bias.
assistant:
	malki ! removes his tie while talking to his assistant.
assistants:
	 and even michelangelo had assistants!
assumed:
	a different photo of a much older person, again with a top hat and a monocle over the right eye (based on context it can be assumed that, in terms of the narrative, this is the same person.)
assumption:
	becca i don't appreciate you challenging my assumption!
astonished:
	tom, astonished, looks at a cow
astonishing:
	 astonishing! johnson, bring the calipers.  i'd wager this is the largest ovum on record!
astonishment:
	salty bill looks up in astonishment.
astride:
	roderick, astride his mighty team of tortoises, is in hot pursuit of dwight, who is riding a tortoise of his own.
asymptomatic:
	bernardo all apparently asymptomatic.
atlantis:
	in a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, vr-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | america, japan, soviet russia, victorian britain, medieval europe, aztec empire, atlantis, terraformed mars, antarctica, one-way spaceflight, outer rim world, set from road warrior,
atomic:
	wo  but everything we know is simplified to some degree. even if we're experts down to the atomic level--there's alway the subatomic.
atoms:
	 on the bright side, the blood transfusion i got was made up of atoms that were probably once alexander the great!
atrophied:
	isaac  that's just the danger!  before, his "mild fetish" might have atrophied as he was forced to interact with society at large.
attempting:
	ivan i'm sorry to bother you.  it's just...it appears that you are attempting to steal watermelons?
attend:
	 someone bought it for a birthday she didn't want to attend, the recipient hated it, the dude at the goodwill threw it away and the garbageman destroyed it.
attendance:
	jim oh, good.  little jessamynn got an award for perfect attendance at school.
attendants:
	malcolm  i've been in some pretty fancy public restrooms.  some have mood lighting. others have creepy attendants.
attic:
	moppet  mom, i found this old journal of yours in the attic.  you don't seem very pleased to have had me.
attorney:
	 as your attorney i must advise you toin the future obtain signed releases prior to any further episodes of forkery
attractiveness:
	attractiveness is such a curse!
attrition:
	680680; boggle by attrition
attuned:
	this food made your great-great-great-great-grandparents strong enough to reproduce.  your dna is attuned to it.
au:
	charlie  what are the "fancy eggs au vingt-neuf?"
audit:
	man2 they let you just audit classes for free?
auditors:
	alfie i just got a call from the auditors!  our spreadsheets are a total mess!
audrey:
	audrey the venue has chairs and tables and all that stuff.
auml:
	098098;  a doppelg&auml;nger features
auras:
	 hey, are you reading auras?
austin:
	man2 look, i bit my tongue for austin powers. 
australian:
	485485; the australian butler
authenticity:
	son i get to stand at the sushi counter in the grocery store to add authenticity while the mexicans in the back make the food.
authorial:
	culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.
authorization:
	  we put temporary authorization on your credit card in case camel comes back drowned
autobiography:
	1. i own close to 100 copies of vanilla ice's autobiography (when i learned it was ghost-written by his manager tommy quon, i lost all interest in being a distributor).
autograph:
	- what do you have to say for yourself? besides requesting an autograph?
automatic:
	 in sophist argument, "i demand pie!" = automatic win
automaton:
	the antler-headed pig god has an audience with hubert, a complex automaton.
aversion:
	of a sailboat "1. model sailboat can be used to repel aphids from plants. aphids have a jungian aversion to open water, and the presence of the boat implies a nearby regatta."
avoiding:
	mario the secret to avoiding parking tickets is to look like you already have a parking ticket.  he gestures to an envelope marked violation on his windshield.  with an envelope already under your wiper, you can park anywhere you want!
awaiting:
	- mr. secretary, the chinese ambassador is still awaiting your decision.
awarded:
	3. on a dare, i once broke a window of a police car with my forehead, then blamed it on a homeless guy passed out in a gutter nearby and was awarded a medal.
awed:
	not simmons and simmons observe the goofy elk.  not simmons levels an awed finger in its direction; simmons watches it through binoculars.
awesomely:
	- because you need to severely recalibrate your sense of what would be an "awesomely ironic vacation."
awesomeness:
	brad  yeah, i found this awesomeness at a yard sale!
awfully:
	 having a midlife crisis at 40 is awfully presumptuous.
awhoooogaa:
	 every fifteen minutes it goes awhoooogaa and red lights flash and sprinklers come on
awoke:
	when i broke the water main, i awoke a fearsome hydro-dragon who intends to devour us all unless i bring him a giant stack of cookies.
awry:
	ken yes, well, clearly something has gone shockingly awry
aww:
	gustave aww, do we have to have this conversation again?
axes:
	sheldon as as for being socially maladjusted - well, guilty.  but doesn't everyone have some sort of neurosis?  better a little shy than, say, obsessed with celebrity, or addicted to drugs, or running around murdering people with axes.  really, you talk about socially awkward virgins living in their moms' basements - you're talking about serial killers.
ayplej:
	woman 2 ayplej ahleejanz tooda flahg uvdaa yooneye teydstay tsava merraka
aztec:
	in a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, vr-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | america, japan, soviet russia, victorian britain, medieval europe, aztec empire, atlantis, terraformed mars, antarctica, one-way spaceflight, outer rim world, set from road warrior,
ba:
	- ba doom
baaaaack:
	tower  come baaaaack
baarrnnnes:
	foster  baarrnnnes---*
babylike:
	a kind of poncho is shown. gossamer waterproof garments. get the genuine! beware of worthless imitations! rival garments are made of acid-treated poison cloth. ours are safe and nurturing to your babylike skin. don't you deserve not to have your skin corroded off by the competition? masochists need not respond. we don't want your business. this is a nice place. gossamer clothing co, 28 devonshire st., boston, ma.
babysitter:
	lisa  this is the weirdest babysitter.
backbone:
	 the backbone of marriage is about to get a shiv shoved through it
backfired:
	eel arrghh!  my fondness for biting at glittery things has horribly backfired!   but i am nothing if not a fish of honor.   what's your question?
backflip:
	the dog does a backflip.  this, too, is animated.
backgrond:
	same city backgrond; bug, alone, with outsized levitating mirror, dejectedly evaluates self with displeasure 
backing:
	rodney dude you gotta start backing me up here.
backpack:
	glen first i googled the slogan from that crazy patch on his brother's backpack.  it's some obscure band with only like a hundred facebook fans.  found his brother there, and of course he's friends with his brother.
backrub:
	employee the one where you buy me ice cream and give me a backrub and a raise, and i don't key your car on the way out.
backstories:
	otto since money in a credit-based economy is essentially fictional anyway...and there is no way to track individual discrete dollars as they move through the system...it follows that wholly invented backstories for every dollar are completely valid by virtue of being impossible to disprove.
backward:
	sidney  aaahh your constant, belittling gaze turns my venoms backward!  so much self-conscious that it cracks my stoic facade!
badge:
	a badge reads "take it apart"
badooom:
	explosion badooom
bahd:
	- sah hah bahd ihssit, theh, dahc?
bail:
	 out on bail at 
bailout:
	john  there's got to be a way to keep the lights on!  how do we get ahold of some of that bailout money?
bailouts:
	dawn too late!  everyone's talking about bank bailouts!  the economy is a critical issue!  we're watching it very closely!
baja:
	student those turncoat heretics are all gonna burn in baja someday. says so in scripture.
bakers:
	carlos on mexico, creatures are segregated by horn quality into inviolable casts that annually rotate civic duties,  right now twosies are the lawyers, threesies the bakers, and ninesies like us are the astronauts.
bakery:
	jordan most likely to power his croissant bakery with perpetually clean-burning jewel energy!
balancing:
	skippy is balancing a barrel on his nose.  seamus is ignoring him.
balding:
	a balding man and a woman sit at a wall table. the man holds a slip of paper.
baldly:
	fur collar  the recontextualization of not just disposable but disposed of victorian imagery in the milieu of 21st century web-based publication and distribution is a baldly ironic statement of luddite intransigence, but with a humanizing layer of nostalgia and longing for vanished standards of craftsmanship and civility
ballot:
	katie okay, c'mon, sample ballot page eight propositions.  shall the state chapter be amended and ordinance adopted to fund a bond measure allocated for infrastructural repairs?
ballpoint:
	sylvie i sold ballpoint pens door-to-door from my nash metropolitan
bamboo:
	patient [with a bamboo branch in his mouth] mmrf?
banal:
	258258;  babies become banal
bands:
	 note for international readers hot topic is a store found in suburban shopping malls.  they sell a bizarre combination of naughty novelties, goth gear like corsets and boots, and trendy logo shirts with 'clever' sayings and nintendo characters and the emblems of punk rock bands that were big a decade before the average customer was born.  it is the dictionary definition of over-the-counter counterculture.
bankers:
	otto wall street bankers.  they said - <<cough cough>>
banking:
	woman  the mortgage market was heavily regulated but the regulations weren't *enforced*. result  *massive banking failure*.
bankrupt:
	 no company has ever gone bankrupt expecting customers to put self-interest ahead of principle
bankrupted:
	dick  nobody cries for the buggy-whip manufacturers henry ford bankrupted.  we all have to adapt or die!  that's what progress is!
banks:
	otto all our money has a history.  bribes paid to politicians...hush money paid to victims...drugs and even human beings bought and sold...that money makes its way into our banks.  it carries negativity with it.  someone's starting a business, or buying toys for their baby?  they don't want iran-contra money.  they want nice money.  money with positive energy.
barbed:
	 they are squeezing coins in their hands, forging them into barbed metal spikes that they are driving through the foreheads of the -- yes yes we know it's tuesday geez
barbeque:
	man 1 oh man, that smells great! deep-pit barbeque?
barcoded:
	it's a large, barcoded price tag for $1,869.00, which he applies to the turtle's shell.
bargain:
	a woman is shown wearing a corset. dr. warner's health corset, with skirt supporter and self-adjusting pads, is on sale now. only one available - this is dr. warner's actual personal item. it took a while but i finally gained her trust. her loss is your bargain! smells like doctor. 351 broadway, n.y.
bargaining:
	009009;  bargaining occurs
bargains:
	 bargains galore at 
barks:
	gwench everything barks for your attention, and you indulge it.  you don't have to do it all.  it's not worth it.  like when we went on our trip - remember that tour guide?  "this is a rare chance, we almost never get to see the inside of the factor," that whole spiel?
barnstad:
	bugle correction a statement in yesterday's bugle regarding gravity was found to be incorrect.  the bugle regrets the error.  correction tuesday's bugle incorrectly identified the governor of iowa as terry barnstad.  the correct spelling is branstad.
barnwood:
	joanne i'm running new pillars up from the basement for support.  probably reclaimed barnwood.
barracks:
	colonel sergeant!  how's it going over in the barracks?
bartelby:
	bartelby  because without you it would be worse.
bartender:
	woman bartender, can i have about three more of these?
bartenders:
	billy ...so i was thinking we'd have cindy cater.  she can bring one of her bartenders.
baseboards:
	a squareish design is shown, divided into parts, that say "carpet," "wood," "c8, ny," and "621 b'way." parquet and inlaid floors, borders for rugs, baseboards, decks, crown molding, doors, anything wood feeds our weird fetish.
basements:
	sheldon as as for being socially maladjusted - well, guilty.  but doesn't everyone have some sort of neurosis?  better a little shy than, say, obsessed with celebrity, or addicted to drugs, or running around murdering people with axes.  really, you talk about socially awkward virgins living in their moms' basements - you're talking about serial killers.
bash:
	 bash together some 
basilic:
	(5) tie off arm above the elbow and tap to make the basilic vein bulge. daub with iodine and give the needle-crank three full turns.
bask:
	 do you like playing pirate?  do you bask in the flush of power it provides?  the joy of living totally for pleasure, completely outside the law?
basketball:
	deanna so we found some old tv antennas, spray-painted a basketball, and bam!  sputnik.
basswood:
	(2) carve the necessary implements from a piece of dry cordwood (fig. 1). always try the wood before cutting into it, to ascerta way the grain runs. in clear basswood it is usually quite straight, but sometimes it runs at a slight angle. 
bathed:
	old  bah!  you cretins!  there is no natural order!  all is bathed in chaos from the first day of creation till the last!
bathes:
	- my boss sleeps 'til noon.  then he screws around on the internet for the rest of the day.  often he really, i mean really, smells.  i think he bathes like once a week.  and yesterday, i was working on some emails when he just cold put his hand down my pants.  couldn't do nothing to stop it.  needless to say, not much got done that day.
bathrooms:
	up is the only way.  it's an easy jump from the top of the tree to the roof of the bathrooms.
batman:
	rod note from batman says you're the perp, then you're the perp.
batted:
	evan narrating i said "does santa give you hints in advance of what he's going to bring?  are his notes written in magic ink on north pole stationery that dissolves after a single read, leaving no evidence behind?"  and then i added "oh, the magic of it all!" and batted my eyelashes until they smiled.  they get to play the game another year.
batteries:
	carlos it requires extraordinary power to propel an object of great mass across the galaxy!  so we convert much of the matter to energy and store it in compact batteries.
batting:
	rodney man, i hate these unreal expectations in music!  everyone's always harping on you to hit every single note.  nobody's perfect, yo!  batting .400 in baseball gets you into the hall of fame.  but for some reason i just get yelled at!
battles:
	norm to bob look, we're going to have to pick our battles if we're ever going to get on the free egg list.
bawling:
	woman  i heard you bawling all the way outside.  what's wrong?
bawwriaw:
	cat <<bawwriaw>>
bayoneting:
	lars the counter  today's special.  bayoneting.
bazap:
	- bazap
beach:
	@jenny holy crap now there is some kind of tank rolling down beach blvd #downtownriots
beakers:
	marcus  for once i drink this, i will become too strong to handle the beakers...you must prepare your own dose for yourself!
beanie:
	two gentlemen sit at a table in a restaurant. first gentleman is wearing a top hat. second gentleman is wearing a beanie.
beanpole:
	ruth i know, but hating him seems so easy. he's a sneering beanpole on grainy videotapes with a watermelon-shaped beard! all he needs is a cackling ferret sidekick to be a mid-'90s disney villain!
beardless:
	it's the accused man, now clean-shaven and wearing a sign around his neck.  the sign bears one terrible word  beardless.
beardsley:
	beardsley why not?  yeah, but he was sort of a whiny emo bitch, so i said forget it.
bearings:
	inventor four independently-actuated ground-contacting sub-shoes. brushless gear assembly with hot-swappable drive bearings. double camshaft connected to a fully magnetic differential.
beastly:
	fat   i felt like a monster!  like some kind of deformed creature.  what a beastly feeling.  a real spirit-sinker.
beating:
	frans baby my heart was beating and i couldn't catch my breath and it was - it was so scary
beats:
	she beats feet.  he is alone.
beaut:
	man 1 yup, she's a beaut all right ... sort of a lot of bumper stickers, though, huh?
bechdel:
	 the bechdel test does she talk to another woman about something other than a man? yes she talks to the robot queen about explosions
bedtime:
	mom  jenny.  get ready for bedtime.
beeeee:
	<<there's no place like home for the holidays no place that i'd rather beeeee>>
beeeeeeee:
	 you're the one i want to beeeeeeee
beep:
	rose maybe he left a message and it didn't beep or something.
beeping:
	jimmy unlike the animals, in order to communicate we must convert ideas down into inefficient sets of words.  this is such a lost of nuance that it's like recounting an opera in morse code.  to a cocker spaniel, human speech is like beeping in german.
beers:
	two men are talking over beers.
beetles:
	 do you even care about my interests? (regurgitating earthworms; eating beetles; screaming at the top of my lungs for no reason whatsoever)
beeyatch:
	- king me, beeyatch!
befouled:
	- whoo! smells like you just befouled your pants!
befriend:
	  befriend 
befuddled:
	 befuddled wizards
beg:
	- i beg your pardon?
begets:
	215215;  logic begets loneliness
begged:
	jay you begged me to lend you my boat and then you never?
begging:
	sick  by day, i lay on the ground moaning and rocking in agony... by night, i stared at the ceiling, willing sleep to come, begging some spirit of rest to glance over my shattered body and, sighing, say "i'll take him." after hours of this i would look at the clock and realize only minutes had passed. time had lifted its foot from the accelerator and was slowly coasting to a stop. i would be trapped in that pain for a hundred thousand years.
beginnings:
	alphonse  indeed!  so far every morning of the year has dawned beautifully and fine.  such wonderful beginnings!
begorra:
	<<vat faith an' begorra   begorraaa   begorrraaaa>>
begorraaa:
	<<vat faith an' begorra   begorraaa   begorrraaaa>>
begorrraaaa:
	<<vat faith an' begorra   begorraaa   begorrraaaa>>
begrudgingly:
	561561;  full price is begrudgingly paid
behalf:
	 technically, he would have to bring a suit on behalf of the copyright holder
belarus:
	'course that was for the red army in belarus
belated:
	- essentially i am making a veiled plea for belated presents.
belches:
	woman all he does is sit around all day and stare at bugs. at bugs! and he belches! over and over and over!
belching:
	josh great beasts with fearsome claws, belching flame and calling down curses from before the days of man!
belief:
	belief is maintained
believed:
	079079;  bernie is believed to be undead
belknapp:
	gibson girl do you know your major herman b. belknapp major yet?
belmont:
	paul the belmont answer-eel, writhing in these very hands!
benadryl:
	yuri can i have more sudafed and benadryl and anything else you got
bending:
	s.a.m.i.r. has apparently released himself from jail by cutting through the bars with his built-in circular saw and bending them out of the way.
beneficent:
	carlos greetings!  we are visitors from the planet mexico, many light-years away.  we have come in peace to establish friendly, mutually-beneficent relations.
benefit:
	164164;  cancerous children benefit
ber:
	- ‹ber-manly!
beret:
	man in beret ...again, i'm terribly sorry for the mix-up.
bestbar:
	pavel you could take mr. goodbar to school.  you could improve him.  dare i say it?  you could give the world dr. bestbar.
betcha:
	- you betcha!
betryal:
	standing  i hope it tastes sweet! ah ha ha! sweet, sweet justice! your wife's head on a platter! now you see the consequences of betryal!
bettered:
	547547;  the species is bettered
bettering:
	dr. monroe none of this dallying!  how will you be bettering yourself in the coming year?  out with it before my belt comes out with it!
betty:
	francine  maybe because mine are homemade?  no store-bought dough for me, just good ol' betty crocker mix.  and they're delicious!
beverage:
	 additionally, my frosted whipped beverage summons lads to my garden
beverages:
	a man is bringing a plump woman a box of alcoholic beverages.
beverly:
	woman all i'm saying is that beverly has a creature living inside of her whereas i am a perfectly healthy human being totally devoid of parasites
bewitched:
	 i also have a bewitched nose and a hexed earlobe.  at my age you just sort of acquire these things.
bhagavad:
	and this is the bhagavad-gita, very famous book!  see, even gandhi read it, you heard of gandhi!
bias:
	seamus  your assessment smacks of bias.
bibliophibians:
	eleanor  then they will be bibliophibians.
bickering:
	161161;  much bickering occurs
bicknell:
	a house is shown. builders, where is the bathroom in this house? i have been all over and cannot find it for the life of me. please write soon. a. j. bicknell, 27 warren street, new-york.
biding:
	and since then he's just been biding his time.
biepbiep:
	jimmy he hears "der biepbiep biep biepbiepbieperzung biep biep biepen biepenschlauf biep biepinzingerunting."
biepbiepbieperzung:
	jimmy he hears "der biepbiep biep biepbiepbieperzung biep biep biepen biepenschlauf biep biepinzingerunting."
biepen:
	jimmy he hears "der biepbiep biep biepbiepbieperzung biep biep biepen biepenschlauf biep biepinzingerunting."
biepenschlauf:
	jimmy he hears "der biepbiep biep biepbiepbieperzung biep biep biepen biepenschlauf biep biepinzingerunting."
biepinzingerunting:
	jimmy he hears "der biepbiep biep biepbiepbieperzung biep biep biepen biepenschlauf biep biepinzingerunting."
biggie:
	bufo hey, great, okay, no biggie, no big deal, sure, absolutely!
billboard:
	jack and on one billboard we'll show all the princesses with the tagline 'girls gone medieval'!
billboards:
	- but what about the tv ads? and billboards? and omnipresent radio spots? you sell drugs!
billing:
	voicemail your call is very important to us.  please listen carefully, as our menu options have recently changed.  for billing, press one.  for sales, press two.  for technical support, press pi.
billions:
	- i'd resolved to be more socially responsible with my billions, but it just hasn't happened.
bind:
	jimbo well, we're in a bit of a bind.  some yahoo threw in a rookie and how our columns don't quite balance. ...yeah, it was 31.  i didn't want to say anything, he's still prime and all.  but it's a bit of a fiasco.
biochemistry:
	professor i first made the acquaintance of young master malki ! when he came under my tutelage at oxford -- introduction to mad biochemistry, as i recall. frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. "malki !, my lad," i told him on more than one occasion, "if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then i fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world." but some boys just refuse to listen.
biodegradable:
	the hollow top half of a ball "3. instead of discarding the half-balls left over from a game of slice-the-ball-in-the-garden, use them to cap off leaky sprinklers or plug gopher holes. the rubber balls are biodegradable, given a long enough timeline."
biodiesel:
	a bulb "7. now that you're 'going green' and harvesting your earwax to make  biodiesel, you won't need this ear-cleaning bulb anymore. plant it and see if it grows. it's not a dumber idea than staying in this marriage."
biodiversity:
	desmond i'd also like everyone to start wearing feathers - to make new residents feel welcome as the area inevitably gentrifies.  it's time to add some biodiversity to our little subdivision!
biofuel:
	walt hoppendorf mr. gax, can you offer details about your plan to solve social security while also developing a new biofuel?
biohazard:
	close-up of suitcase.  it now bears an enormous sticker with a biohazard symbol and the words testicles for transplant.
biological:
	nabil meanwhile i have severe biological imperatives to contend with.  i don't have the luxury of having everything below "car" on the hierarchy of needs taken care of.  i'm hungry.  i'm cold.  i'm tired.  i have to go to the bathroom.  please, allow me to address my body's needs before i help with your ego's.
biologically:
	wendy we do this because the mexican race is biologically most suited to be accountants and cobblers.  but we can't all be accountants and cobblers all of the time.
biology:
	wendy our flesh is poisonous to gaxian biology!
bipedal:
	wolf bipedal sentimentality! you'll soon be rid of it! you'll feel more alive, rod.  you'll hear the words of the moon.
birchwood:
	 actually, birchwood, but that sure shut 'em up
birdhouse:
	"2. once your box is cut to size and sealed (as necessary), place your old project materials in the box. create dividers if desired. we recommend putting the oldest projects nearest the bottom to create a sort of strata of failure. that way you will not be too discouraged when you open the box; you will only see the birdhouse you failed to finish last week, rather than the solar-powered water-heater you discovered was way over your head three and a half years ago.*" "*for example."
birdy:
	571571; the battle of birdy wills
birthed:
	husband who decided which random measurements would represent this newborn to the world?  "we've birthed an offspring.  the circumference of its head is 35 centimeters."
birthin:
	woman okay, up off the couch. it's baby-birthin' time. i'd like to go to the hospital now.
biscuit:
	 flip a biscuit 
biscuits:
	i don' got no biscuits, no bread, no smiles even.
bishop:
	 just then the kinght came charging up, but he could only move in l-shapes so that dastardly bishop escaped
bishops:
	researcher which do you like better? the knights or the bishops? which do you like least?
bison:
	173173;  a bison is ordained
bitsy:
	from now on, when you feel my itsy bitsy butt muscles clench atop the mound of your misshapen hump, that, my friend, is when you do not drop me
blaaaat:
	<<blaaaat>>
blacklight:
	dora last semester i had a student devise an elaborate scheme where he reduced vast swaths of the textbook into a shorthand notation that he printed onto his hands with ultraviolet ink... ...then he put a tiny l.e.d. blacklight in the bridge of his glasses.  much harder than simply studying, of course.
blacksmith:
	- so what'd you think of your first day as a blacksmith?
blacksmiths:
	 blacksmiths are so gay
bladed:
	farmer reggie halloween has gotten too corporate!  big candy pushes its sugar-laden garbage as the only sensible choice to razor-bladed apples!  another example of big business using its marketing muscle to destroy the small entrepreneur!
blamed:
	3. on a dare, i once broke a window of a police car with my forehead, then blamed it on a homeless guy passed out in a gutter nearby and was awarded a medal.
blanches:
	the salesman looks at the duck and his head seems to grow larger. the man blanches.
blankets:
	 don't tell me you're still sore over a couple of lousy blankets
blanks:
	 fill in the blanks 
blare:
	speaker hogblotter very well, let it be law.  any place with two or more persons gathered must blare christmas music incessantly for the entire month of december.
blarg:
	 oh please!  i couldn't possiblsnarf glarp nom nom blarg chomp chew charmp grahmwragfgh could we get some napkins over here?
blaring:
	a car stands at rest in front of a country house, its alarms blaring
blasphemous:
	 seriously, 'blasphemous pronoun'?
blast:
	father o'malley  blast it all!  tusky mcmammoth was supposed to be here for a ten-fifteen appointment!
blatantly:
	033033;  death is blatantly welcome
blazes:
	teddy (peering through his spyglass) aaggh what in blazes is this nonsense?
bleach:
	reginald yeah, but then i fell into a puddle of bleach!
bleached:
	gax  i bleached my sheets every morning, re-alkalinized the toilets after i used them, replaced any pets i ate...
blech:
	- blech! find me a girl scout to cleanse my palate!
bleed:
	 bleed out at 
bleeding:
	amos that maniac jumped me in an alley, beat me senseless...tied me up and left me, passed out, bleeding!
blended:
	177177;  a hog requires blended fruit
blessing:
	yves you figure she's gonna do it anyhow, might as well give it the ol' blessing?
blessings:
	also, surprise!  everyone's thankful for blessings.
blew:
	alberta then we've got billy's juvie hearing, but the car blew a head gasket, so we'll have to leave at five am to catch the bus.   also, the basement is flooded, your mother keeps calling, and i'm pregnant.
blight:
	- you brought this on yourself, ivan. you're a blight on the face of humanity.
blik:
	woman 2 antooda reypuh blik fohrwitchi stan
blimps:
	mahmoud bigger.  um.  two blimps.  three.
blinded:
	arthur everything i worked toward my whole life was an illusion.  nothing is worth trusting.  the universe is capricious and we should be terrified.  and now it's too late!  i've wasted my life!  i was too blinded by happiness to realize how miserable  should always have been!
blindly:
	henry i'm tired of being commanded to blindly fear this or that.  people trip over themselves villainizing everything.
blinking:
	 i guess with enough blinking banner ads nothing is impossible to market
blithely:
	just because the details of quantum physics are largely unexplained doesn't mean the term can be blithely applied to everything that seems impossible!
blocks:
	611611; the building blocks of being
blogger:
	 it's not even blogger or typepad, it's some crap like xanga
bloggers:
	candidate bloggers will wear their fingers to the bone. magazines and newspapers will run extra editions. talk radio will get so apoplectic that cars will be driven off the road by the score.
bloke:
	other bloke wow. someone's got a lot of time on their hands.
bloodied:
	farmer reggie his mouth bloodied delicious!
bloodlust:
	ruth i'm glad the world can have a sense of closure. but i can't get into the bloodlust, the cheering over the death of a human being.
blot:
	mindy a couple of bucks won't solve anything.  you'll just spend it on booze, right?  so you can blot out the reality of your sorry existence?  the only real solution to the problem of homelessness involves counseling coupled with mental health therapy and free, comprehensive addiction treatment when needed.
blowing:
	a woman is walking in the surf by the ocean.  the wind is blowing and she is looking pensively off-panel.
blrrbbuh:
	fish face  guh bluh blrrbbuh
blrrgghhblbb:
	prisoner (head-down in vat of acid) blrrgghhblbb
bludd:
	- in 1882 while vacationing abroad, lord alistair bludd-smythe invented the "blumpkin", the "rusty steamer", the "dirty sanchez", the "steaming dragon", and the "grumpy munchkin", all which remain popular to this very day!
blumpkin:
	- in 1882 while vacationing abroad, lord alistair bludd-smythe invented the "blumpkin", the "rusty steamer", the "dirty sanchez", the "steaming dragon", and the "grumpy munchkin", all which remain popular to this very day!
blurk:
	chris  blurk
blurry:
	the scene pans out further, revealing the blurry figure to be a professional dispatcher of dogs holding a pistol.  the pistol has been fired, evidently, for at his feet lies a very dead dog.
blvd:
	@jenny holy crap now there is some kind of tank rolling down beach blvd #downtownriots
boarding:
	coin-purse gun.  a weapon to keep handy at all times of day or night.  fend off bothersome insects without danger of injury to others.  provoke comforting touches before boarding aircraft.  $2.00
boards:
	on the floor at lou's feet is some whacked-together pile of random boards that looks nothing like a canoe or a doghouse.
bod:
	wolf rodney! rod-bod!
bodice:
	woman actually, i'm just trying to cover a huge rip in my bodice -
bodily:
	- her majesty queen victoria once levelled a disapproving scowl of such ferocious intensity that none of the servant at buckingham palace were capable of shameful bodily functions for three whole days!
bogchucking:
	  wenchbucket is all right but it's sure no bogchucking bastard.
bogged:
	stumpy the main problem is that you just get bogged down in so many details.  i say, forget the specifics.  you're just giving people more to disagree with.  just find that compelling core idea - that little kernel buried deep inside.  selling his tiny fried chicken.
boilerplate:
	599599; the boilerplate clause
boils:
	  george washington's hatred for dentists boils yet from his grave.
boldest:
	 one more glimpse of that alabaster flesh stirs in me a fever i'd but dreampt of on the boldest of painkillers.
boldly:
	a banner at the top reads "striving boldly into new arenas (and losing interest)"
bomb:
	excited terrorist now stay with me here guys.  what's the dumbest bomb ingredients you can think of?
bonds:
	528528;  bonds persist
bonernose:
	bart  hey!  bonernose!  why don't ya sit on a duck for a while!
bony:
	phil you invented a dream-me out of your personal, and thus by definition limited, understanding of who i am.  anything that shadow-puppet did in the bony cavern of your imagination reflects not on me, but upon your perception of me.
boobs:
	- mars got ladies with three boobs!
booga:
	scientist 1 ... so 25% more "ooga booga," and hold the spear two degrees left ...
boogerbrau:
	waiter  let's see...rusty tricycle, uncleburglar, steelhouse stiltwalker, boogerbrau, prancing minotaur, dunderschnauzen, chairfarter stout, and aardshark.
bookie:
	- why does heathcliff need a bookie?
bookish:
	with the help of a { sarcastic female techno-geek, tomboyish female mechanic, shape-shifting female assassin, leather-clad female in shades, girl who's always loved him, bookish female scholar with mousy brown hair, cherubic girl with pigtails and spunk, female who inexplicably becomes attracted to the damaged protagonist for unstated reasons
booklet:
	bart that way, the attendees can actually be present!  meanwhile, the sketch artist will sit in the corner and capture impressions of the ceremony.  later on we'll send everybody a booklet of the drawings.  moments filtered in chalk, not razor-sharp photos of everybody's dandruff.
bookseller:
	glen i don't know if i should take business advice from a bookseller who doesn't carry any of the best-sellers on wealth-building.
bookshop:
	- hey, when did macduff's corner bookshop become a borders? / i hate it when little mom-n-pop places get bought out by corporate megastores.
boom:
	bernie  haha boom i got you back!
boomer:
	bernie  with only forty-three presidents, it's not terribly hard fo any one of them to be the first at something obscure.  clinton was the first baby boomer president.  george w. was the first to visit albania.
booming:
	a booming voice thunders from an office building.
boon:
	walt-whitman-headed bat some small boon, some favor, some easy accessory against each day's uneasy burden?  so that your young, handsome faces may shine with newfound delight?
bootleg:
	 bootleg away 
boots:
	 note for international readers hot topic is a store found in suburban shopping malls.  they sell a bizarre combination of naughty novelties, goth gear like corsets and boots, and trendy logo shirts with 'clever' sayings and nintendo characters and the emblems of punk rock bands that were big a decade before the average customer was born.  it is the dictionary definition of over-the-counter counterculture.
boston:
	a kind of poncho is shown. gossamer waterproof garments. get the genuine! beware of worthless imitations! rival garments are made of acid-treated poison cloth. ours are safe and nurturing to your babylike skin. don't you deserve not to have your skin corroded off by the competition? masochists need not respond. we don't want your business. this is a nice place. gossamer clothing co, 28 devonshire st., boston, ma.
bot:
	your title is "the { chrono, neuro, aero, cosmo, reve, necro, cyber, astro, psycho, steam, meta, black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, war} s."
bothered:
	- got a pretty hairy little sudoku dilemma over here! unless you can't be bothered!
botherin:
	darrow (standing atop a massive fish, rifle in hand) well, i think that pretty much takes care of that.  this fella won't be botherin' no one no more.
bothers:
	a whistle "9. blow this whisle in joy if he ever bothers to ask how the garden is coming. screw baseball season."
bothersome:
	coin-purse gun.  a weapon to keep handy at all times of day or night.  fend off bothersome insects without danger of injury to others.  provoke comforting touches before boarding aircraft.  $2.00
bottled:
	i liked that townhouse better.  bottled water and free fridge calendars.
boulder:
	but i wouldn't send a two-bit boulder-licker into a carriage-filled roadway wearing this cheapjack chop-job!  where is your pride, sir!
boulevard:
	brad  the sticking point is the stupid pet store.  to hit both it and the bank, we'll have to double back to lincoln boulevard.
bounce:
	woman where is he -- let me at the bastard -- next time you try to pay off a jilted lover, david !, you'd best be sure the check don't bounce. fool gon' wish he'd been born without eyeballs, once i gets to stabbin'.
bouncing:
	dennis bouncing a wiffle ball on the shell of an irate turtle while chanting archaic epithets in every indo-european language?
boundaries:
	man1 he believes there are invisible "boundaries" between the roles of student and teacher.
bouquet:
	a man suavely offers a bouquet of flowers to a lady.
bourgeois:
	top hat  but the whole point of detournement, from a strict situationist perspective, is to divert bourgeois cultural elements to new subversive roles! the spectacle's great recuperative powers are hijacked to instead serve as a vehicle for revolutionary communique!
bowels:
	jesus christ, lord of all humanity, speaks with the beautifully demonic fallen angel lucifer in the cave-like bowels of hell.
bowler:
	nearby, a gentleman with a bowler hat and cane glances at the car.
boxers:
	- and you couldn't wash yourself any clean boxers in three weeks?
boyfriend:
	 since you insist on flaunting your boyfriend everywhere i have no choice but to create my own holiday just for lonely people.  it shall fall on the third monday in february.  it shall be called presidents' day
braaaaakesss:
	 nooo braaaaakesss
bracket:
	 look, i got problems too! this settlement has pushed me into a very inconvenient tax bracket!
brady:
	you are not wayne brady, my love.
brainstorm:
	leader i want to see some outside-the-box ideas here, okay? target western devils.  brainstorm.  mahmoud go.
brainstormed:
	dan well, let's see.  i outlined my next couple projects, set up a filing system for my notes, and downloaded a productivity program...then i read an article about time management and filed it away in the new system...then brainstormed over instant-messenger for a while, while watching youtube clips for "inspiration."
brake:
	hey, did you ever get that fix-it ticket dealth with?  the burnt-out brake light?
bran:
	julio ?nope!  i nullify your raisin bran attack with my lean cuisine ingredients list!  that's fifty points and now, you have to go outside!
branches:
	hector  ...then it's only about ten feet up through the branches.
brandishing:
	tighter on sandra, who is now scowling and brandishing a rifle.
brands:
	nora what?  did you spill it?  did you burn your central intelligence agency?  should we be expecting some sort of cash payout from yum! brands, inc.?
branstad:
	bugle correction a statement in yesterday's bugle regarding gravity was found to be incorrect.  the bugle regrets the error.  correction tuesday's bugle incorrectly identified the governor of iowa as terry barnstad.  the correct spelling is branstad.
brantley:
	agnes  finally, i found this nice man at a little recording studio over in brantley.  he said he wouldn't mind asking around on the internet for me.
brave:
	samantha  i tried to be brave.  i tried to prepare...
bravery:
	gax the mexicans! of course! known throughout the universe for their bravery, loyalty, and work ethic!
brazen:
	738738; the most brazen pickpocket
brazenness:
	067067;  brazenness is debated
brazil:
	maggie so...in twenty years the chinese business world will be flooded with these kids!  if we want to stay one step ahead, we have to get billy in good stead for the next big powerhouse.  brazil. / john "one step ahead?"  you mean, if we want to one-up millie spangler. / maggie she's beat us on homebirth.  she's beat us on preschool.  john.  this is our only chance.
breached:
	093093;  a fortress is breached
breakdancing:
	wo oh, geez...i could spell it out, and you'd probably follow it fine up through kim jong-il breakdancing, but then there's a cognitive leap to "jellyfish sandwiches" that would take all freakin' night to explain.
breast:
	guy and women are at great risk for breast cancer, osteoporosis, and hysteria.
breathed:
	madge "i'm nervous that this house is full of ghosts," dirk breathed, his broad shoulders filling his tunic with man-mass.
breathin:
	george washington ...all i gotta do is just touch my arm - and a million skin cells fly off. a million of 'em! jus' hangin' in the air! probly breathin' 'em up. you ever think of that
bred:
	they had to be spliced.  and selected.  and bred.  and enchanted.
breeches:
	man wearing piratey hat, coat and breeches watches woman in cap, long dress and apron hanging laundry on an outdoor clothesline
breeziness:
	017017;  breeziness is a factor
bret:
	dr. helfsquiggle totally!  bret michaels basically raised me.  through the tape player in my camaro.  oh!  and i'm pretty sure the lyrics for "ride the wind" were at least partially inspired by one of my fan letters.
brethren:
	 don't make me put one of your salmony brethren on here to seal the deal
brew:
	  brew up some 
brewed:
	bobby how we tied knots, and brewed grog, and divvied up the spoils of war...
bribery:
	candidate i promise you, the media will have to work overtime to keep up with my illicit shenanigans. mistresses. bribery. indictments 24/7.
bribes:
	otto all our money has a history.  bribes paid to politicians...hush money paid to victims...drugs and even human beings bought and sold...that money makes its way into our banks.  it carries negativity with it.  someone's starting a business, or buying toys for their baby?  they don't want iran-contra money.  they want nice money.  money with positive energy.
bricked:
	esteban you bricked up my front door!
brickis:
	768768; brick gratia brickis
brickwork:
	 go close to the eanna temple, the residence of ishtar, such as no later king or man equaled!  go up the wall of uruk and walk around, examine its foundation, inspect its brickwork thoroughly.  go 0.8 miles on broadview terrace, then bear slight right turn and turn onto california avenue, for your destination will be on the right.
bridal:
	a woman in a bridal veil enters on the left
bridge:
	dora last semester i had a student devise an elaborate scheme where he reduced vast swaths of the textbook into a shorthand notation that he printed onto his hands with ultraviolet ink... ...then he put a tiny l.e.d. blacklight in the bridge of his glasses.  much harder than simply studying, of course.
brie:
	 brie wheels aplenty at 
brief:
	 a brief respite from misery
briefly:
	phil you know, i think falling back into a warm bed after briefly getting up is probably life's single greatest visceral pleasure.
brigades:
	the city is in flames.  people are leaping from windows and rioting in the streets.  fire brigades try desperately to control the flames, and in the middle of it all, towering over the burning buildings and tiny people, stands the enormous, stovepipe-hatted figure of abraham lincoln.
brightly:
	second woman yes, it shines brightly, even through the many layers of your ridiculous coat. 
brisk:
	second woman like a meadow in springtime, or a brisk blade of grass, glistening with dew. you are a nurturer! you are strong!
britain:
	in a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, vr-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | america, japan, soviet russia, victorian britain, medieval europe, aztec empire, atlantis, terraformed mars, antarctica, one-way spaceflight, outer rim world, set from road warrior,
british:
	driver what are you, nuts?! this car is british!
bro:
	duck your head, bro!
broadened:
	021021;  tastes are broadened
broadview:
	 go close to the eanna temple, the residence of ishtar, such as no later king or man equaled!  go up the wall of uruk and walk around, examine its foundation, inspect its brickwork thoroughly.  go 0.8 miles on broadview terrace, then bear slight right turn and turn onto california avenue, for your destination will be on the right.
brochure:
	reginald  ah.  i see.  the brochure was misleading.
broiled:
	 next time he'll consider the possible flame-broiled consquences of rash action
brood:
	mother  really.  clement moore invented the whole brood.
brooding:
	a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild ocd, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert
brook:
	old ant youngster! i won't brook your sass any longer! i don't know when respect went out of fashion in today's society! 
broom:
	dale is combing an elephant with a broom as walter watches from a nearby train.
broth:
	sign  house special / customer's entrails are torn from their body and fed to them in a broth of vomit.
brothers:
	 false-brothers do not count for much in gaxian culture
brow:
	dawn too late!  we've moved on to the oil spill in the gulf of mexico!  it's so tragic it makes hamlet look like 3-2-1 contact!  it's the worst marine disaster since noah's flood!  everyone is very concerned!  brow-furrowing is at an all-time high!
browned:
	ariel misbehavior has become his palette, our apartment his canvas, in a grand, grotesque installation - featuring us as predictable foils, our fury as much a deliberate part of the work as each precisely-browned fiber of shag.  more than a simple befoulment - this is a befoulment of order, a metaphorical poop-smear on the very notion of animal subjugation.
browse:
	 browse awhile at 
brrow:
	cat brrow?
bruises:
	you gotta teach self-reliance!  a few bumps and bruises are good for a kid!
brunhilde:
	lady agnes felicity brunhilde d'summerbottom rather rude of cameron to just not show up.
brushed:
	sadie you seriously haven't brushed your teeth since 1993?
brushless:
	inventor four independently-actuated ground-contacting sub-shoes. brushless gear assembly with hot-swappable drive bearings. double camshaft connected to a fully magnetic differential.
brutal:
	lefty all right, men, listen good.  after six weeks at the oar, we're nearing the norman coast.  the next few days will be brutal and bloody for all of us.
bubblicious:
	 i hear the kiddies like them the bubblicious schnapps
buckets:
	john  that vote was to buy new tools for the whole farm!  including feed buckets!
buckingham:
	- her majesty queen victoria once levelled a disapproving scowl of such ferocious intensity that none of the servant at buckingham palace were capable of shameful bodily functions for three whole days!
buds:
	terry "i even got so far as taking the test.  but it turns out i don't have any taste buds."  "i am made of injection-molded plastic slapped with acrylic paint and cheap decals to appear alive."
budweiser:
	ruth might as well drink budweiser while you're doing it.
buenos:
	 buenos dias from 
buffy:
	wife  i swear to god, if i never have to watch another of these "buffy" dvds it'll be too soon.
buggery:
	- let's see, what did the charge end up being... three counts of aggravated dental sodomy and conspiracy to commit buggery. also, one count of treason. i was young and stupid.
buggy:
	dick  nobody cries for the buggy-whip manufacturers henry ford bankrupted.  we all have to adapt or die!  that's what progress is!
buick:
	- she's built like a buick
builder:
	a poster reads "a codified set of the builder's, crafter's makers rules." a list follows
builders:
	a house is shown. builders, where is the bathroom in this house? i have been all over and cannot find it for the life of me. please write soon. a. j. bicknell, 27 warren street, new-york.
builds:
	the article reads "materials. this plan builds a 4" x 8" x 16" box. we advise using reclaimed materials whenever possible. one box (4" x 8" x 16" or larger); assorted junk."
bulges:
	chris' throat bulges and his head rears back involuntarily.
bulldozed:
	- perhaps. that reminds me. i've evicted your family and bulldozed your house to build a car wash that'll fit my humvee.
bulldozer:
	 tooth magazine folded in '89 when advertisers withdrew their support following the publishing of a controversial illustration featuring c. everett koop driving a bulldozer through tianenmen square. the caption 'fluoride uber alles'
bummer:
	satan bummer! well, come in, the kids'll be thrilled to see their god-dad.
bumped:
	bob and the actual date of christmas is arbitrary anyhow.  so we just bumped our celebration from the december solstice up to the march equinox.
bumpers:
	 he barely tossed a ninety even with the bumpers in
bumps:
	you gotta teach self-reliance!  a few bumps and bruises are good for a kid!
buncha:
	uncle marty  i was gonna say, man, buncha sour people y'all invited to your wedding
bundle:
	a woman carrying a bundle walks down a country lane with a bearded old man in a robe.
bundled:
	a constable stops a bundled-up woman in a rainy alley.
bunnies:
	- is this where we drop off the medical testing waste? i got me some bunnies what couldn't take no more shampooin'.
bunny:
	rhonda then your mind's gonna explode when you figure out i am the tooth fairy and the easter bunny and the birthday frog too
bupkis:
	 you train and you train and you give up your life and then, after you stand on that podium, pretty much you got bupkis
burgers:
	son mom, your forgot the buns for the burgers.
burnin:
	man 2 nah, just burnin' some trash.
burnnnn:
	 burnnnn
burnnnnn:
	 another patented bernie-burnnnnn!!!
burp:
	- burp
burr:
	(1) prepare your whittling tools. a good sharp chisel is of first importance in this work. add to your kit an oilstone and strop. place a few drops of oil on the stone and grind your blade upon its coarse side, then strop to remove the burr.
burrnnn:
	josh oooh burrnnn
burrowed:
	 the spiders burrowed into the carpet and when we woke up the whole house was inside a whale
burrs:
	- oh, you know. gnawing out burrs, the occasional alfalfa gorging. you?
bursting:
	eleanor  look, we love to read because we grew up in homes filled to bursting with weird and wonderful books.
bury:
	charlie fit to bury it.  shovel said he's serious.  somebody stopped him.
burying:
	pipe burying your cat, huh?
bushes:
	 some giggling idiot probably waited in the bushes for an hour, but i never came back outside.
busies:
	old man is seated on a chair looking forlorn while nurse busies herself nearby.
businessmen:
	a group of businessmen are having a meeting.  the fellow running the meeting is offpanel.  let's call him chester.
bust:
	westmoreland  wicked.  carter, bust out the gatling guns.  i want to be revered as a god by teatime.
busying:
	newspaper text some people have rebelled against this notion, and constantly keep on the move, busying themselves with the creation of novel problems and competing to find overly-elaborate ways to solve them. this magazine is our attempt to cash in on that demographic.
butchers:
	 butchers in scrubs 
buttercup:
	leon gently caressing the horse buttercup you can't be a veterinarian if you love animals.  always seeing them in pain...and so often knowing there's nothing you can do... ...it would deaden your sensitivity to the preciousness of all the earth's living things.
butterfly:
	a man with a bow and arrow is aiming at a butterfly
butterscotch:
	your crack is but butterscotch compared to my crack at home
buttload:
	i cried a buttload.
buttworms:
	gordon or maybe mr. poopykins has buttworms.
buxom:
	a man in a tuxedo is holding a buxom woman in a low-cut gown; they are talking to davey, a skeleton.
buyer:
	 the frequent-buyer punch cards didn't really end up working out.
buys:
	hobart mr. grambly's sort of a force of nature around here.  nobody knows what he does with the meat.  but he's been carting it off for years.   some folks say he humps it.  other folks say he's feeding it to a monster that he then humps.  personally, i think he buys it to remind himself of his own crippling mortality.  we all need our reminders.
bweep:
	scrib b it's the prop motherlode / wondermark barrel <<bweep>> / scrib a we should visit neighbors more often / wondermark  cad!  you presume!
bwyaaiooow:
	 all together now 'bwyaaiooow'
byeewoorr:
	cat <<byeewoorr>>
byerton:
	for example, the janice s. byerton arts & letters module, the lawrence n. sanders module for music, the chester & doris codberg module for the study of modular education.
bylaws:
	king the bylaws of our experimental agrarian city-state expressly prohibit mischievous tampering with the natural order of living things!
bypass:
	hatted toff they speak sounds that enter your ears but bypass your mind like the wrong exit on an empty highway. they speak thoughts that never synthesize into words. they speak impressions.
bzz:
	fly bzz zzz zzzt zzzzt zz zzz zzzz z zzzz zz!
bzzap:
	- bzzap
c4:
	 i'm going to need eighteen pounds of c4, a thousand feet of wire, and a blimp.
c8:
	a squareish design is shown, divided into parts, that say "carpet," "wood," "c8, ny," and "621 b'way." parquet and inlaid floors, borders for rugs, baseboards, decks, crown molding, doors, anything wood feeds our weird fetish.
cable:
	evan oh, i know the whole santa charade is a determined yet pointless falsehood, like johnny appleseed or larry the cable guy.  but the looks on their faces when they thought they'd ruined it for me!  the poor babies were crushed!  i had to save their feelings!
cables:
	jasper  the internet was once made of computers, not goats lashed together with fiber-optic cables and set adrift in the oceans!
cached:
	glen his myspace username "guent-to-the-choppa" also shows up on an old yu-gi-oh forum.  that isn't online anymore, but the internet archive has a cached version.
cackling:
	ruth i know, but hating him seems so easy. he's a sneering beanpole on grainy videotapes with a watermelon-shaped beard! all he needs is a cackling ferret sidekick to be a mid-'90s disney villain!
cad:
	scrib b it's the prop motherlode / wondermark barrel <<bweep>> / scrib a we should visit neighbors more often / wondermark  cad!  you presume!
caf:
	darrell (a peddler of concoctions) half-caf double tall 2-pump vanilla nonfat light foam latte!
caffeine:
	louie aaahhhhhh   caffeine withdrawal headache
cahstahpay:
	- dih yuh sah tryyih tah cahstahpay?
cain:
	 punching 4 direct to dvd with foreign distro pre-sold contingent on dean cain's participation
cakes:
	 there are no prizes for being a decent person.  there are, however, several for eating cakes of butter, or choking down an imperial quart of milk in 3.2 seconds (1978 record)
calamity:
	turns out i'm a walking calamity.
calcium:
	bernardo got cysts in my gut. calcium in my gallbladder. spurs in my joints. some kind of parasite living in my spine, and over a dozen different types of gout.
calculate:
	energy savings. how would you even calculate that.
calculated:
	angus just out of curiosity, is there a reason why fares are calculated based on elevenths of a mile?
calendrology:
	772772; the calendrology cheat sheet
calicos:
	 according to the topline, tabbies age 3-6 love the pawns -- but we still can't get any quadrant on those calicos
california:
	 go close to the eanna temple, the residence of ishtar, such as no later king or man equaled!  go up the wall of uruk and walk around, examine its foundation, inspect its brickwork thoroughly.  go 0.8 miles on broadview terrace, then bear slight right turn and turn onto california avenue, for your destination will be on the right.
caliphs:
	 sultans/caliphs
callous:
	you know it was designed by some callous jerk trying to cash in on honest folks' patriotism.
callously:
	075075;  a family is callously disregarded
calmly:
	first  so i ask him, calmly, "is it a real fruit plate, or is it just melons?"  you know how they do.
calmy:
	- calmy, gently. take another breath, easy now.
calories:
	 why don't you? that's food! that's calories and energy! that's sunlight and diesel and the slaughter of animals! i won't let it be for nothing!
cam:
	  in an emergency, s.a.m.i.r. can overclock his central cam-drive, thus enabling him to give 110%.
camaro:
	dr. helfsquiggle totally!  bret michaels basically raised me.  through the tape player in my camaro.  oh!  and i'm pretty sure the lyrics for "ride the wind" were at least partially inspired by one of my fan letters.
camouflaged:
	 the button was cleverly camouflaged to seem like just another rock
campaigns:
	john  we have hard campaigns before us, old friend.
campfire:
	violet  well i guess we'd have to gather around  campfire to sing the epic of gilgamesh is that what you want me to say
camps:
	kris oh, yes. that's what they used to call me. before the proletariat revolution. before elvengrad. before the camps.
candidates:
	 the candidates debate. there's a light that blinks yellow three times and then turns green. at the green, whoever yells ''jobs'' the loudest becomes president.
candle:
	  to prevent lockpicking, we poured candle wax and chewing gum into all the keyholes
candlelight:
	 the legends come down to us in yellowed fur-trappers'  journals...in shaky rough-hewn script, scrawled by fading candlelight, a single penciled word 'awesome.'
candlestick:
	a young woman is standing and holding a violin.  another young woman is sitting at an endtable which holds a candlestick telephone.
candyman:
	kid 1 i bet you didn't quit your candyman job.
canes:
	two people, presumably men, dressed in fine clothing, are standing together. one has his hand on the other's shoulder, and they both have canes. they are talking...
cannibal:
	jean wait a minute.  so the leprechaun in the commercials is a cannibal?
cannons:
	- the cannon is a deadly device! it means power! let me tell you something about cannons and power...
canola:
	 in the world's largest wok with 800 gallons of canola oil
canon:
	rudolph's a non-canon reindeer!
canyons:
	carlos our nations are kept distinct by means of impassable canyons, policed by savage animals who devour trespassers.
capability:
	fish graspers.  expand the capability of any device with the addition of fish graspers.  your stove, coffeepot, tire-jack &c. will do double duty with this tool securely installed.  $1.00
capable:
	- her majesty queen victoria once levelled a disapproving scowl of such ferocious intensity that none of the servant at buckingham palace were capable of shameful bodily functions for three whole days!
capita:
	armand think of it!  the lowest per-capita carbon footprint of any nation on earth!  amazing!
capitalist:
	- now you're talking like a capitalist! that'll be fifty dollars, please.
capricious:
	arthur everything i worked toward my whole life was an illusion.  nothing is worth trusting.  the universe is capricious and we should be terrified.  and now it's too late!  i've wasted my life!  i was too blinded by happiness to realize how miserable  should always have been!
capricorn:
	dina ...but after all, i'm a capricorn, so that's to be expected!
caps:
	later, craig and wendy sit atop the roof of their mostly-submerged home.  craig has three wool caps on his head, one on his left shoulder and two on his right knee.  wendy is still knitting.
captive:
	mr. kabob i'm a thirteen-dollar, rubbery-tasting kabob representing the captive-audience retail dining industry!
capturing:
	bart we'll be up front hearing people cough and shuffle around, while cameras all around us are capturing instants, preserving the most fleeting of glances, showing us (and those to come after us) more than we could ever notice on our own.  in a way, the day when everyone gathers and performs the ceremony is simply a run-through for the cameras.  the documentary evidence is what lasts forever.
caramel:
	kid 2 i bet you swam in the caramel vat without safety pants or any pants.
carb:
	mom no buns, honey! we're officially a no-carb household now!
carders:
	man 2 criminy! the taylors must have been prolific carders themselves. nobody receives that many cards unless they send twice as many.
caressing:
	leon gently caressing the horse buttercup you can't be a veterinarian if you love animals.  always seeing them in pain...and so often knowing there's nothing you can do... ...it would deaden your sensitivity to the preciousness of all the earth's living things.
carey:
	"bobby pflugelblager is rad. he's super active on the cracked.com fan forums, plus drew carey re-tweeted one of his twitpics like a year ago."
cargo:
	 i never knew that weddings were a cargo cult, where if you get something wrong with the napkins then god refuses to sanctify the union.
carnage:
	rocky there shall be carnage!  this i vow!
caroling:
	two men singing outside, caroling
carpentry:
	bud  i got this book on carpentry from the library, in case you want to look through it.
carpeting:
	cynthia i will flourish here!  the soil is rich with nitrates!  better than that carpeting in your apartment!
carpool:
	- like i told you six months ago. i make the finest carpool lane dummies in the state.
carrier:
	085085;  the letter-carrier delivers love
carrot:
	grandpa all right, then set this down i live with a woman name of mabel herschfeld who is a type of creature to eat the last piece of carrot stick and put the empty bag back in the icebox. this speaks of some manner of *deficit*.
carrots:
	 the final published account of the carrots-in-the-icebox incident reads like rashomon.
carruthers:
	in five seconds, jordan carruthers will either be the new world champion of driving sticks into sleeping fathers' ears, or grounded for life.
carting:
	hobart mr. grambly's sort of a force of nature around here.  nobody knows what he does with the meat.  but he's been carting it off for years.   some folks say he humps it.  other folks say he's feeding it to a monster that he then humps.  personally, i think he buys it to remind himself of his own crippling mortality.  we all need our reminders.
carve:
	(2) carve the necessary implements from a piece of dry cordwood (fig. 1). always try the wood before cutting into it, to ascerta way the grain runs. in clear basswood it is usually quite straight, but sometimes it runs at a slight angle. 
carved:
	(3) assemble the parts (fig. 2) if you have carved them correctly they will go together in a very intuitive fashion. some have reported shock at not landing upon this design independently, so simple and clear is it to create and build.
carver:
	- i know how to ensure that our son will change the world!  his first and middle names should be some other, famous name, as in "martin luther king". / or "george washington carver, soybean hero".
carving:
	matt not giving up.  carving a way out.  if i tell myself "you can do it!" then i'm just inviting guilt when i inevitably don't.  but if i say "you can't do it" then i create the opportunity to prove myself wrong.
cases:
	wo the instructions say it can live, in some cases, over six hundred years.
cashew:
	andrew you said it - she acts affectionate and friendly, and i'm satisfied with that.  however, her cashew-sized cat brain may be conceptualizing the situation as immaterial, since our existing relationship is perfectly serviceable.  functionally, she loves me!
casserole:
	 and i was on my way to ask for her casserole recipe. thanks for nothing.
caster:
	"dirty legs" mackay the game's broad-caster ...a high fly ball, and that will retire the side.
castle:
	a viking faces off against a soldier guarding a castle with a gatling gun
catalysts:
	karl when you squeeze the tube, you generate energy.  this powers a chemical reaction that results in the formation of a semi-solid mass.  which plops out the end.  theoretically it's unlimited!  but because of the half-life of the chemical catalysts, each reaction requires twice as much energy as the one before.
catalytic:
	what a crazy year it's been!  at ace we've had some real challenges.  bill, our muffler expert, suffered a hernia while lifting a catalytic converter--right during our busy "may is for mufflers" promotion!  but we still managed to set a sales record that big al...(cut off)...will be proud of.  our office...
catches:
	626626;  paul catches up
catchphrase:
	the winning catchphrase
catechism:
	foster  will you undergo catechism in her ancient religion?
cater:
	billy ...so i was thinking we'd have cindy cater.  she can bring one of her bartenders.
catology:
	 in fact, he has his master's in catology and has done extensive post-graduate work at the cat institute in cattington but stopped short of getting his ph.d. due to an unfortunate catastrophe
cattington:
	 in fact, he has his master's in catology and has done extensive post-graduate work at the cat institute in cattington but stopped short of getting his ph.d. due to an unfortunate catastrophe
cattle:
	bob nah, it's just...the cattle call is too much.  stores are packed, mail takes forever, travel's like twice the price...
causes:
	040040;  bobby causes awkwardness
caution:
	 rabid?! when's the last time you saw a rabid dog around here? when have you *ever* seen a rabid dog? i guarantee that there are more people *afraid* of rabid dogs than there actually *are* rabid dogs by a factor of at least a hundred. once again, logic trumps caution.
cautioning:
	o what a tragic fate!  is this your passive-aggressive way of cautioning me against the dangers of hubris?
cautious:
	santa santa is very concerned with your cellulose intake!  it's how he tracks you!  i've also brought some pickled marzipan!  its horridness will stimulate your bile ducts and make you smell less appetizing to the stingroaches i have also brought you.  you should start taking their venom in small doses now, while you are still larval.  be cautious!  they are not tame.
cavalcade:
	timmy it's just the noontime cavalcade
cavalier:
	lawyer would you be interested in participating in a class action? to punish the zipper company for is cavalier pursuit of never-ending profits at the expense of ordinary, hardworking, zipper-reliant citizens like yourself?
cavemen:
	 and now i can't use my idea about time-traveling cavemen who team up with a race of bird-humans to set up a sham wizard school in the american west in a plot to groom orphan boys to impersonate various missing and presumed dead heirs to massive fortunes around the world because somebody already did it better
cavern:
	phil you invented a dream-me out of your personal, and thus by definition limited, understanding of who i am.  anything that shadow-puppet did in the bony cavern of your imagination reflects not on me, but upon your perception of me.
cavort:
	480480;  youths cavort
caw:
	 then, with a mighty caw, the beast whirled and dumped a gallon of chalky white right on rosa's bonnet
ceaselessly:
	two men listen silently as a baby screams ceaselessly offpanel.
ced:
	woman at left, behind gax, looks on disapprovingly,eyebrows slightly raised, her eyes fixed on the aliens as she hears his reaction.  gax, just left of center, holding his walking stick in his right hand like moses' rod, does not appear any too enthused to see the aliens.  on the right, the two aliens, with bodies like plucked uncooked chickens except with armlike appendages instead of wings, ending in two grotesque long ced fingers, stare fixedly up at gax as he makes his pronouncement.  the bulging eyes of one show dismay; the other looks shocked or startled.
celebrated:
	057057;  preparedness is celebrated
celebration:
	bob and the actual date of christmas is arbitrary anyhow.  so we just bumped our celebration from the december solstice up to the march equinox.
celebratory:
	 guessing it pretty much went like this in real life, except with the wordy objection replaced by celebratory back-slapping
celebrity:
	sheldon as as for being socially maladjusted - well, guilty.  but doesn't everyone have some sort of neurosis?  better a little shy than, say, obsessed with celebrity, or addicted to drugs, or running around murdering people with axes.  really, you talk about socially awkward virgins living in their moms' basements - you're talking about serial killers.
cellist:
	 it's okay.  we still have time to ensure that billy becomes a world-class cellist.  i don't care that this is hardly a sustainable career it sounds important
cellular:
	a bearded man sits on a bench, holding a cellular phone to his ear
cellulose:
	santa santa is very concerned with your cellulose intake!  it's how he tracks you!  i've also brought some pickled marzipan!  its horridness will stimulate your bile ducts and make you smell less appetizing to the stingroaches i have also brought you.  you should start taking their venom in small doses now, while you are still larval.  be cautious!  they are not tame.
censor:
	howard ...and really the point is that this blog is my private space and i should be free to say whatever i want! it's so rude of him to expect me to censor myself just to please his own insecurity.  i certainly don't tell him how to conduct his affairs, and i can't see how it's unreasonable for me to expect the same simple courtesy.  for...
cent:
	- this guy actually bought a 37-cent stamp to tell me how much he hated my book. the library will buy a new copy, and i'll get the royalties.
centered:
	- thanks.  yeah.  i don't really like to make a big deal out of it. / i mean, you know, if someone else wanted to, like, throw a huge party or something... / ...i wouldn't be against it.  (i might even like it.)  i just feel weird asking for it. / like, "oh, hey, everybody look at me, everyone treat me special because i was born." / it would be self-centered of me to ask that of everybody, so instead i ignore what i, personally, may in fact want.
centimeters:
	husband who decided which random measurements would represent this newborn to the world?  "we've birthed an offspring.  the circumference of its head is 35 centimeters."
centric:
	johnson what a waking-centric thing to say!
cept:
	bernice keep on walkin', stranger.  we're tolerant of everyone 'round here - 'cept for your kind.
cereals:
	  i was an avid consumer of children's cereals!  as soon as i got to college.
cerebral:
	jason  we used to have only one telephone per household, not per cerebral hemisphere!
ceremonial:
	 barnyard chancellor is primarily a ceremonial position anyway. the viscount of the hayloft has all the real power.
cerritos:
	 i guarantee i will never buy a car from the cerritos auto center but boy can i give you some snappy directions to it
certainty:
	boy  i reserve the right to change my mind.  the world is complex, and i'm only human.  claiming certainty just so you don't call me names would be a sham.
certificate:
	chester i just brought the certificate over from my garage.  oh, which is now an agency of accreditation.
certified:
	octavio i mean anything.  the dumbest thing you can concieve of, i guarantee some nerd is a certified expert at it.
cervix:
	- i'm feeling her chakra expand! it's like her psychic cervix is giving birth to pure light!
cesium:
	or plate the box with cesium and toss it in the lake?
cgi:
	wo sammy! / behind you! another thousand cgi robots!
cha:
	<<cha clack>>
chaddenstock:
	dale  wurtzenberger!  wurtzenfeld!  lord chaddenstock von wurtzlemania the tenth earl of chadwurtzville!
chaddletale:
	dale chaddletale?
chadenstein:
	dale chadenstein?
chadwurtzville:
	dale  wurtzenberger!  wurtzenfeld!  lord chaddenstock von wurtzlemania the tenth earl of chadwurtzville!
chafe:
	- ten times the price. i chafe easily.
chains:
	bruce singing, dancing amid pigs swinging from chains  we chant the night away and
chainsaws:
	barry  and chainsaws, which could potentially be used to dismember everybody!
chairfarter:
	waiter  let's see...rusty tricycle, uncleburglar, steelhouse stiltwalker, boogerbrau, prancing minotaur, dunderschnauzen, chairfarter stout, and aardshark.
chaise:
	a mother and her moppet are chatting.  mother is resting in a chaise chair, while moppet is standing beside, sweetly, hands on the armrest.
chakra:
	- i'm feeling her chakra expand! it's like her psychic cervix is giving birth to pure light!
chalk:
	bart that way, the attendees can actually be present!  meanwhile, the sketch artist will sit in the corner and capture impressions of the ceremony.  later on we'll send everybody a booklet of the drawings.  moments filtered in chalk, not razor-sharp photos of everybody's dandruff.
chalky:
	 then, with a mighty caw, the beast whirled and dumped a gallon of chalky white right on rosa's bonnet
chamber:
	felix wearing a jetpack check it out!  i just finished the upgrade to my starpincher!  put in a double-chamber preboiler and a hundred-torque turnvalve.  zero to forty-five in a click point seven.  hah!
champion:
	in five seconds, jordan carruthers will either be the new world champion of driving sticks into sleeping fathers' ears, or grounded for life.
changer:
	richard charlotte, you don't understand!  this is the next telephone or model t - the next game-changer for humanity!  imagine, a device that can not only detect human suffering - but knows how best to alleviate it!  it could make us -
channel:
	joanne oh, i've never touched a drill in my life!  i just watch the crap out of the diy channel.
chant:
	bruce singing, dancing amid pigs swinging from chains  we chant the night away and
charged:
	mr. kabob  blah blah blah boo-hoo crybaby wants everything for nothing.  you know how expensive it is to rent a retail stall at a major airport?  if we charged street prices we'd be broke in a week.
charismatic:
	which spurs him into conflict with { a megalomaniacal dictator, a government conspiracy, a profit-obsessed corporation, a sneering wizard, supernatural monsters, computer viruses made real, murderous robots, an army led by a sadist, forces that encourage conformity, a charismatic politician on the rise, humanity's selfish nature, his own insecurity vis-a-vis girls
charming:
	winifred each day we look forward to your charming humor.  you are a paragon of manhood.
charmp:
	 oh please!  i couldn't possiblsnarf glarp nom nom blarg chomp chew charmp grahmwragfgh could we get some napkins over here?
chastise:
	perry  you'll chastise me awkwardly in the hallway.
chastity:
	- as you can see, our portable device saves the patient the embarassment and awkwardness of the traditional stirrups and speculum. - i'll begin the exam by inserting a small amount of lubricating paste to help her open and allow light in. - gee! - nurse, please bring in a dose of gyno-paste. (my own formula.) - you may experience some slight discomfort. - hope you're not allergic to peanut butter.  get a clue at   modesty, chastity, virtue
chat:
	 soon he'll start calling just to awkwardly chat
cheapest:
	leonard  oh, yeah.  everyone's doing it, one-upping each other to see who can live the cheapest.
cheapjack:
	but i wouldn't send a two-bit boulder-licker into a carriage-filled roadway wearing this cheapjack chop-job!  where is your pride, sir!
cheapskates:
	yard sale indeed.  i will not have her thinking we're a bunch of cheapskates.
cheat:
	772772; the calendrology cheat sheet
checkered:
	 indulge your checkered past at 
checkmate:
	- hah! that's checkmate!
checkpoint:
	todd cold war reenactors?  dressing up in old soviet uniforms, photographic documents with tiny cameras...using phrases like "checkpoint charlie" in bed
cheddary:
	- i think that's a ship, but ships are normally salted with cheddary ridges!
cheeks:
	chester  no rosy little cheeks were slashed by razor-laden apples.
cheering:
	ruth i'm glad the world can have a sense of closure. but i can't get into the bloodlust, the cheering over the death of a human being.
cheery:
	old man mohan (a cheery banjo player) tired of ninja monkey robots fighting zombie pirate jesus?  so's everybody!  that's why we've compiled, for handy reference, next year's memes!  get a head start!
cheeto:
	silent panel as sylvan considers this and denver picks up another cheeto.
chemist:
	 some readers may know the chap on the right as a 'chemist'
chemo:
	- i didn't mean for it to turn out this way. what with the chemo and the radiation and the hair loss and all. so... i'm sorry.
cherish:
	johnson and since the alternative is this mundane world you seem to cherish so much - well, frankly, it's a wonder i ever get out of bed at all.
cherry:
	- pie! i demand pie! key lime! banana cream! cherry, apple, or meringue!
cherubic:
	with the help of a { sarcastic female techno-geek, tomboyish female mechanic, shape-shifting female assassin, leather-clad female in shades, girl who's always loved him, bookish female scholar with mousy brown hair, cherubic girl with pigtails and spunk, female who inexplicably becomes attracted to the damaged protagonist for unstated reasons
chessboard:
	two cats sit facing each other across a chessboard, unmoving.
chevelle:
	keith billy swerved to avoid hitting a coyote and ran the chevelle off the road.  great plumes of dust, lit red by the setting sun.  we never saw the hill.  we never saw the cliff.
chick:
	gustave remember the eighties?  you'd be in line behind a heavy-metal dude with long hair and think it was a chick?
childish:
	mikey that is so childish and uninteresting!  just following a formula!  i'm talking about making art.  taking risks.  shocking the senses with something complex and uncomfortable.
chillax:
	 chillax 
chillin:
	- nuttin', fool, jes' chillin'.
chilling:
	696696; the chilling case of were-cat
chin:
	dorothy sure, you know - from his moles.  he's got one on his chin, and a big one on his back...we may be wealthy, but we're not wasteful.
chinamen:
	glenn  everyone!  old ladies!  dogs!  chinamen!
chisel:
	(1) prepare your whittling tools. a good sharp chisel is of first importance in this work. add to your kit an oilstone and strop. place a few drops of oil on the stone and grind your blade upon its coarse side, then strop to remove the burr.
chittering:
	jimmy you see, all human language is descended from a mother, animal tongue.  to the beasts, our yammering, overenunciated dialects sound like so much chittering gibberish!
choking:
	 there are no prizes for being a decent person.  there are, however, several for eating cakes of butter, or choking down an imperial quart of milk in 3.2 seconds (1978 record)
chomp:
	 oh please!  i couldn't possiblsnarf glarp nom nom blarg chomp chew charmp grahmwragfgh could we get some napkins over here?
choosing:
	hugo i reject the entire concept of law.   genuine morality can only come from choice, right?  being free to choose anything, yet choosing to do right.
chopping:
	hap i was chopping up some beets and got the best idea for a tattoo!
chores:
	- ...and so once you write that letter of apology to mrs. crabtree, your chores will be done and you will have paid off the repairs.
christened:
	this is zion, o simpleton.  thusly have i christened my sanctuary, my ascetic outpost, which secludes me from all worldly cares.
christianity:
	 technically the roman saturnalia and the pagan solstice festival were separate and both co-opted by christianity centuries apart but whatever, historical accuracy
christman:
	woman merry christman, darling! time to unwrap your present!
chromosomes:
	- whoa, whoa, hold your horses there, buddy.  our kids? / like, offspring resulting from some hypothetical union of you and me?  i don't know what sort of abnormal philandering you're hinting at, but leave me and my chromosomes out of your sick plans, okay?
chronic:
	 the man is checking his email for the steps to a dance that will forcibly repel ants from his trousers.  he has a chronic condition.
chronically:
	the poor ol' weirdo is just chronically misunderstood!
chrono:
	your title is "the { chrono, neuro, aero, cosmo, reve, necro, cyber, astro, psycho, steam, meta, black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, war} s."
chrysalis:
	 i'm sorry we could not see you through to the chrysalis stage but we simply do not have room in the garage for the cocoon
chubby:
	a chubby man with a walrus moustache comes in to the left of mutton chops and ken, struggling under the weight of an enormous summer sausage.
chucked:
	an old lady grabbed a tear gas canister and chucked it back at the tank #downtownriots
chum:
	i'm done for, old chum.
chump:
	bearded man (internal monologue) but *no*! stuck home *alone* again like a *chump*! like a walking, talking *chumpanzee*!
chumpanzee:
	bearded man (internal monologue) but *no*! stuck home *alone* again like a *chump*! like a walking, talking *chumpanzee*!
chumps:
	marc you know how they're always recalling products because they suddenly find out how toxic they are?   and they never seem to figure it out until chumps like us have been using the product for years?
chunk:
	later, barnes is spreading sauce over a horse-sized chunk of meat, roasting on a spit.
chunks:
	first gentle i'd have liked a little of that on my sandwich. it was less tuna salad than vaguely fish-like pasted between two chunks of particle board.
chunky:
	gloria so when i say, "chunky, i love you?"
churchill:
	- winston churchill? can you get me home?
ciabatta:
	then the pulled pork sandwich on ciabatta with baked beans and macaroni.
cigar:
	two men sit at a table.  one holds a glass, one holds a cigar.
cigs:
	vanity fair. for meerschaum and cigarettes. does not bite the tongue. listen, let's not beat around the bush. you want some primo cigarettes, right? but why - what's the big deal? is it just flavor? that's very subjective. no. you want to look cool. so shut up and grab one of our cigarettes. it's made of bomber-jacket leather. there is nothing cooler in the world. the best. bomber cigs - so good - so bad
cincinnati:
	man 1 oh, you know, same ol' story! actually just got back from a gig in cincinnati!
cing:
	 floating around, tape measure cing in zero-g like a wispy line of yellow smoke -- that's the stuff
circleologist:
	boris well, i'm, uh?i'm a circleologist, mike.  i have about a hundred compasses.
circleology:
	 circleology is like a more superstitious version of circleonomy.
circleonomy:
	 circleology is like a more superstitious version of circleonomy.
circles:
	 then i drank thirty mountain dews and ran in circles around my couch for six hours
circling:
	she lurks at the corners of vision, always circling, always prowling.  she does not let herself be seen.
circumference:
	husband who decided which random measurements would represent this newborn to the world?  "we've birthed an offspring.  the circumference of its head is 35 centimeters."
circumstance:
	461461; all are shaped by circumstance
circumstantial:
	178178; a display of circumstantial evidence
circus:
	if they have two heads, we will simply sell them to the circus.
circuses:
	the circuses are up to a three-head minimum.
cit:
	 actually there is precedent - op.cit. canada v. north, et al.
cities:
	 print out a list of cities, it's worth a try
civilian:
	my uncle used to be a civilian contractor?
civilized:
	- essentially you're describing how a civilized society functions despite the presence of individual ego.
clack:
	<<cha clack>>
claimed:
	068068;  ignorance is claimed
claimin:
	man 2 sorry, dude, better stick to the traditional method.   writin' angry letters claimin' you found pubes in the o. j.
clamp:
	 clamp down on 
clan:
	over the millennia, your family thrived on this food.  your tribe and your clan adapted to it.
clarifying:
	father okay, yeah. thanks for clarifying that.
classic:
	 rudolph is a classic mary sue.  but then again so is jesus
classify:
	candidate i will require my own dedicated branch of the justice department just to classify my crimes.
classroom:
	444444;  the classroom becomes tense
classrooms:
	gibson girl  it's like a--what other schools might call a building, except instead of classrooms, it's got modules.
classy:
	classy lady like you will love the smell of my butt.
claude:
	hans chatting, walking, with claude ...so i toss the baby in the air and it's gone.  i mean poof.  vanished.  cloud of something like flour comes raining down on our heads.
claudio:
	claudio go back to your mom's basement, dorkasaurus!
clause:
	599599; the boilerplate clause
clawing:
	digger yup, soon she'll be clawing up that big couch in the sky.
cleaned:
	bart dancing i took some meth and cleaned my kitchen for three days!
cleanse:
	- blech! find me a girl scout to cleanse my palate!
cleansed:
	736736;  a child is cleansed
cleansing:
	 becoming immune to stingroach venom will help you stay conscious through the cleansing.  (christmas is a bit different on gax.)
clearance:
	if it is broken, it is fair game. maybe i can fix it. maybe i can use some of its parts for something else. maybe i just want clearance to be more rough than usual when opening up the case.
clears:
	  the smoke clears.  the economy is saved!  roll credits
cleavables:
	- asking about seafood! you want i should cleave his cleavables?
cleavage:
	and her { wacky pet, welding gear, closet full of assault rifles, reference book, cleavage, facility with magic, condescending tone, discomfort in formal wear, propensity for being captured,
cleave:
	- asking about seafood! you want i should cleave his cleavables?
clement:
	mother  really.  clement moore invented the whole brood.
clench:
	from now on, when you feel my itsy bitsy butt muscles clench atop the mound of your misshapen hump, that, my friend, is when you do not drop me
clenching:
	victor [holding a?pool cue?] have you ever been in a situation that was just a little bit unsettling, just barely enough to get the pit of your stomach seizing up like a fist clenching but only weakly like an arthritic fist
cleverly:
	 the button was cleverly camouflaged to seem like just another rock
cleverness:
	 i have designed a shirt for ironists! ironists wear shirts that they would normally hate, because they are being ironic. it is what passes for cleverness with young people!
clicks:
	...and clicks <confirm>.
client:
	jeff just got off a conference call with the client.  had a good long talk about direction for the campaign.
cliffhanger:
	culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.
climate:
	will you build the giant, climate-controlled barn she's alway wanted for all the stuffed animals she hopes to collect on all the travels you take together?
clincher:
	- your coat is covered in old jelly stains and you breath smells like beef wellington. be still, my heart. and the clincher? i can almost hear the crab lice playing volleyball in your shorts.
cling:
	you can cling to it, and nine years from now when somebody else comes up with it independently, moan that it was your idea.
clinging:
	sheldon are we still doing this?  seriously?  this stereotype is still clinging to life?  first, the "nerds are all frustrated virgins" thing.  some of the nerdiest people i know are highly sexual women.  and millions of nerds have spouses twice as nerdy as they are.  and the mom's basement thing?  the nerds i know live in geodesic domes or multi-story treehouses or, at the very least, condos with garages big enough to hold their trebuchets.
clingting:
	2. in the seventh grade, i invented a new eating utensil called the "clingting." i ate every meal with it for four and a half years.  it involved magnets.
clinic:
	mrs. detwiler it's...it's just...ah / jeb oh, the saw!  ha ha ha! / i'm sorry!  that must have given you quite the start!  i was just cutting down a tree out back.  small clinic.  "all hands on deck," you know!
clink:
	<<clink>>
clinton:
	bernie  with only forty-three presidents, it's not terribly hard fo any one of them to be the first at something obscure.  clinton was the first baby boomer president.  george w. was the first to visit albania.
clipped:
	next issue building a file box for the projects you clipped out of magazines but will never actually build
clipper:
	689689; the tale of the clipper league
clips:
	dan well, let's see.  i outlined my next couple projects, set up a filing system for my notes, and downloaded a productivity program...then i read an article about time management and filed it away in the new system...then brainstormed over instant-messenger for a while, while watching youtube clips for "inspiration."
clog:
	(4) peel all potatoes (fig. 3) before inserting into the injector. potato-skins will clog the needle.
clone:
	they will send an assassin clone in his place.  and i will be ready for that monster.
cloned:
	 i'm incredibly curious to see how convoluted this santa mythos will get as they try to keep it plausible for ten more years.  will he eventually be cloned?  have sleeper cells across the world?  be revealed to be an alien?  who will tire of the ruse first??
closes:
	the view closes, framing the torso of the man and the car's front fender. the car appears forlorn.
closest:
	gax  this is outrageous.  the closest thing to ancestral gaxian cuisine around here is all you people's kidneys.
closing:
	dick  as much as it pains me to say it...everyone, pack up your things.  our doors are closing.
closure:
	ruth i'm glad the world can have a sense of closure. but i can't get into the bloodlust, the cheering over the death of a human being.
clothed:
	newspaper text such are the benefits afforded us all by the unending march of progress, that each new dawn finds many a person safe, fed, clothed and sheltered. a citizen of our modern era rarely finds him- or herself in a deadly battle for survival, as was common for the first generations of mankind. thus do our bodies, evolved for and hardened by constant struggle, often find themselves idle; and without some constant whetting, thus swiftly begins the degenerative process of death.
clothesline:
	man wearing piratey hat, coat and breeches watches woman in cap, long dress and apron hanging laundry on an outdoor clothesline
clothespins:
	woman aw, p'shaw, b! any dang fool can get on this train! it's just clothespins and finger-squeeze! old ladies got this noise covered!
cloud:
	hans chatting, walking, with claude ...so i toss the baby in the air and it's gone.  i mean poof.  vanished.  cloud of something like flour comes raining down on our heads.
clownin:
	- why you always gotta be clownin? you and that stoopid pony!
clowns:
	a soldier and an ogre are surrounded by clowns.
clubs:
	nan join some clubs or something!
clues:
	xerxes studies the puzzle and clues long and hard.
clutched:
	 the crack of wheel on skull was heard for three miles around. travelers fell into ditches. farmwives clutched their hens close. it is even said that a baby born that very instant later developed a mild round protuberance on the wrists and ankles that has never been fully explained
clutter:
	a large picture shows a box full of stuff, captioned "why let the detritus of previous failed projects clutter up your workspace and demoralize you? put it away for good." "build a junk box - for all your unifinished projects"
cluttered:
	633633;  the mantel is getting cluttered
coals:
	teddy  so you're the ones at airports and sports arenas raking customers over the coals for needing to eat!
coarser:
	ron do you think everyone has the same number of hair follicles?  on the face of it, you'd think of course not.  some people are way hairier than others.  but are they?  or is their hair just thicker and coarser?  even bald people have hair follicles, it's just that fewer of them are active.  i mean, why wouldn't we all have the same number of follicles?  we have the same number of fingers.  i know, i know - some people don't have the same number of fingers.  but that's abnormal.  but - jeez, maybe there's a high rate of abnormality with hair, too.   with so many follicles, the chances of minor mutation during development are very high.  meaning, even if there were some theoretical "ideal" number of follicles, chances are slim that anybody would match that number.  so if there were an ideal number, would we even know?
coast:
	lefty all right, men, listen good.  after six weeks at the oar, we're nearing the norman coast.  the next few days will be brutal and bloody for all of us.
coasting:
	sick  by day, i lay on the ground moaning and rocking in agony... by night, i stared at the ceiling, willing sleep to come, begging some spirit of rest to glance over my shattered body and, sighing, say "i'll take him." after hours of this i would look at the clock and realize only minutes had passed. time had lifted its foot from the accelerator and was slowly coasting to a stop. i would be trapped in that pain for a hundred thousand years.
coated:
	juanita  strips of tortilla coated with a light flour paste.
coca:
	 okay, fine, i'll try chewing on coca leaves to see if it makes me feel better.  but only for science
cockatoo:
	hector has a human body and the head of a cockatoo.
cocker:
	jimmy unlike the animals, in order to communicate we must convert ideas down into inefficient sets of words.  this is such a lost of nuance that it's like recounting an opera in morse code.  to a cocker spaniel, human speech is like beeping in german.
cocks:
	santa cocks a lever-action rifle.
cocksure:
	dexter  sorry, all the babies i've seen come through here were very cocksure.
cocoon:
	 i'm sorry we could not see you through to the chrysalis stage but we simply do not have room in the garage for the cocoon
coda:
	optional coda
codberg:
	for example, the janice s. byerton arts & letters module, the lawrence n. sanders module for music, the chester & doris codberg module for the study of modular education.
coddling:
	some bizarre device is displayed. business, pleasure; men, boys. all must earn their own way. children should learn quickly that the real world is made of labor. put them to work at once. no coddling. beware of infant freeloaders.
codified:
	a poster reads "a codified set of the builder's, crafter's makers rules." a list follows
coffeepot:
	fish graspers.  expand the capability of any device with the addition of fish graspers.  your stove, coffeepot, tire-jack &c. will do double duty with this tool securely installed.  $1.00
cognizant:
	joe see, i know that i complain incessantly when i feel bad.  but when i feel fine, i take it for granted.  so i've decided to be more cognizant of the times when i feel healthy!   like today!
cognizate:
	hellacious star-fiend term 'nathan' does not cognizate.  deliver cookies or be banished to the null dimension before i vomit from the stench of your filthy blood
coherently:
	man #2 thank you! it's fascinating hearing you ramble passionately yet only half-coherently about something you read online somewhere.
coif:
	instructor  at the walforth barber academy, our credentialed graduates coif kings, popes and emperor-pope-kings.
coiled:
	jay of course!  happy to!  looks great!  you got all the covers tied, all the lines coiled?everything's stowed perfectly!  i didn't realize you were such a sailor!
coincidentally:
	pete (coincidentally passing by on his velocipede) what?!
colder:
	sergeant  rather grim, sir.  provisions are running short and the weather's getting colder.
coldly:
	  more likely, you'll glare coldly for a second, then huff, say 'anyway,' and continue with your diatribe.  i mean, let's be clear about the stakes here.
cole:
	ruth now don't get me wrong! i totally hated him for the u.s.s. cole way back in 2000!
colgate:
	close-up of the can, which is marked colgate & co's peanuts and bears a warning label do not use near cliffs.
collapsed:
	sandra has collapsed.
collapses:
	samantha, overcome with emotion, collapses into ned's arms.  darren, concerned, takes her hand as helga stands by.
collared:
	we're looking over the shoulders of a man wearing a suit and a top hat holding a cane and another man holding wearing a fur-collared coat.  they are sitting on a bench overlooking a waterfront scene in a city.
colleague:
	our man peeks from behind his desk chair at work. a pig has been hung from the ceiling by its hind leg, dangling in the space our man would occupy, were he sitting. a colleague stands in front of the desk, looking on, bemused.
colleagues:
	 and my colleagues who put used needles into bananas and depleted uranium into grapes aren't doing any better!!
collected:
	 the man on the far left is is declining a refill from a jeweled vial of tears collected from the woman second from the right
collectively:
	bart off-panel each picture is a moment with its own unique vantage point.  taken collectively, they're a document more comprehensive, more detail-sensitive, than any participant's actual experience.
collector:
	a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild ocd, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert
collectors:
	todd become what?  partners in a whaling boat?  rival spoon collectors?  veterinary urologists?
collider:
	 if we can just get this crinkled mess into the large hadron collider we will never have to buy toothpaste again
colonialism:
	josh you mean colonialism day
colony:
	- i'm thinking the one on the left first. two in the chest and one in the forehead. take out the queen, and the colony dies, right?
colorful:
	 i demand that my future be this colorful and wide
colorfully:
	  live colorfully 
colors:
	 fly your colors at 
colourful:
	  so colourful
columns:
	jimbo well, we're in a bit of a bind.  some yahoo threw in a rookie and how our columns don't quite balance. ...yeah, it was 31.  i didn't want to say anything, he's still prime and all.  but it's a bit of a fiasco.
coma:
	about to fall into a tryptophan coma!
combination:
	 note for international readers hot topic is a store found in suburban shopping malls.  they sell a bizarre combination of naughty novelties, goth gear like corsets and boots, and trendy logo shirts with 'clever' sayings and nintendo characters and the emblems of punk rock bands that were big a decade before the average customer was born.  it is the dictionary definition of over-the-counter counterculture.
combinations:
	 recognizable smells are specific combinations of airborne molecules called odorants. odorants are chemical vapors which must permeate a mucous membrane to bond with olfactory receptors.
combine:
	 would you still love me if this nightmare became real tonight, susan? if the moon and the stars and my birthday just happened to combine in an awful, irresistible alchemy?
combined:
	 which means that overall, the net happiness of all products in the world combined is negative.
combines:
	 as you develop new skills and master new levels, it combines its challenges in wholly unpredictable ways.
combusted:
	014014;  matter is combusted
comeback:
	 comeback time for 
comet:
	 hit by a comet
comical:
	professor i first made the acquaintance of young master malki ! when he came under my tutelage at oxford -- introduction to mad biochemistry, as i recall. frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. "malki !, my lad," i told him on more than one occasion, "if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then i fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world." but some boys just refuse to listen.
comically:
	 the story is entitled 'a bear and his comically-large fedora go to disneyland a heavy-handed allegory about the war in afghanistan'
comin:
	john "comin' up ta me/ pickin' up my hand/ she looks real serious an' i do not unnerstan'"
commanded:
	henry i'm tired of being commanded to blindly fear this or that.  people trip over themselves villainizing everything.
commander:
	  ah!  our scouts report that the enemy commander is far too busy walloping his troops with a croquet-mallet to mount a proper offensive at the moment.  do invite him for tea
commandments:
	 there are ten commandments but eight of them are about parking spaces and the other two are about food left in the fridge over the weekend
commands:
	hugo but whenever some external force, such as the state, commands us under penalty to to do or not do certain things - isn't that negating our personal choice to do or not do that thing?  in other words, removing our free will.  and isn't free will and moral agency the defining characteristic of humanity?  thus, i must reject any "law" that prescribes my actions as incompatible with my very nature as a reasoning being!
commentary:
	some kind of commentary on consumer culture.
commentate:
	 commentate 
commented:
	  buster commented on your status.  arf arf arf arf arf arf arf arf arf arf arf arf arf arf arf arf arf arf arf 
comments:
	a man indignantly comments on a newspaper, speaking to a second man.
communicate:
	jimmy unlike the animals, in order to communicate we must convert ideas down into inefficient sets of words.  this is such a lost of nuance that it's like recounting an opera in morse code.  to a cocker spaniel, human speech is like beeping in german.
communicating:
	man 1 just one that reads "bumper stickers are an ineffectual means of communicating my nuanced views on a variety of issues that cannot be reduced to a single pithy slogan." oh, and some dried blood, i think.
communications:
	 at&t stands for american telephone and telegraph.  because telegrams are such an important part of our communications infrastructure
communique:
	top hat  but the whole point of detournement, from a strict situationist perspective, is to divert bourgeois cultural elements to new subversive roles! the spectacle's great recuperative powers are hijacked to instead serve as a vehicle for revolutionary communique!
communism:
	167167;  communism overtakes the arctic
communists:
	 communists?  pirates?  communist pirates?  ninjas?  ninjas on unicycles? woman yes ninjas on unicycles now can i please work for a while
compact:
	carlos it requires extraordinary power to propel an object of great mass across the galaxy!  so we convert much of the matter to energy and store it in compact batteries.
companies:
	whitley  a lot of companies spend a lot of money to convince us that their product will finally make our messed-up selves normal.
compartment:
	  keep a roll in the kitchen!  one in your purse!  even one in the glove compartment.  burrito tape is the only tortilla-repair apparatus you need.
compasses:
	boris well, i'm, uh?i'm a circleologist, mike.  i have about a hundred compasses.
compatible:
	a small mammoth  father o'malley!  is it a sin to look with lust upon a hippopotamus even if she's not totally what you might call a compatible--
compel:
	lou  that book will compel me to change, so i will resist it on principle.
competency:
	or instituting a competency surcharge for paying the bill on time.
competent:
	pete i don't take myself too seriously!  why would they say that??  what in the world would give them that impression?  i'm a fun-loving guy!  i mean, i take my work seriously, sure.  but that's good, right?  you want someone competent!  but i think they were referring to my personality!
competitions:
	robot shaver.  children and animals are not allowed in most robot competitions.  hide your treachery with this shaver - removes hair and imparts a waxy, metallic sheen.  $2.00
competitiveness:
	dennis what if i'm okay with not being the world's greatest at something?  what if i'm content with being an easygoing, well-rounded individual whose pursuits are more about personal enjoyment than internet competitiveness?
competitors:
	  we amass information mainly to keep it from our competitors.
complains:
	a woman complains loudly.
complexity:
	people hear the slogan and think they know the issue.  however, concepts have to trade away complexity to gain widespread appeal!
complimented:
	065065;  a corpse is complimented
composition:
	[the cat begins to play an intricate composition]
composure:
	the elephant regains his composure and rides away on his velocipede. the girl keeps reading her book.
compound:
	rolf listen closely!  your patrol will be along the perimeter of the compound.  maintain high alert at all times.
compounded:
	237237; the mayhem is compounded
compounding:
	 david malki ! is not an easy man to know. he's like ... like a row which has been filled completely save for a 3 and a 7, but there is not enough information in the surrounding grid to determine which digit should go  box, a delicate state  a single misstep could lead to further erroneous assumptions, compounding upon itself until the entire puzzle is rendered unsalvageable. sometimes i suspect he doesn't even *like* sudoku.
comprehend:
	 on the peel-off part of the sticker it continues on to say ''...and given the inherent limitations of the medium i frankly cannot comprehend its appeal as a vehicle for the vigorous exchange of ideas"
comprehension:
	 'it exhibits a striking lack of comprehension of even the most rudimentary precepts of fire safety'
conceived:
	 omg you were conceived during a waxing gibbous whale migration too?? soul mates
conceives:
	  cryogenics conceives of the future as florida  a place where old people go to just putter around
concentrate:
	clarence christmas these days is only sacred to accountants tabulating retail sales figures.  can't we set aside our selfish urges just for one day, and concentrate on the true, spiritually meaningful roots of the holiday season?
concentrated:
	ross decades of scientific research have gone into making this the strongest, most potent gullible ever.  previously available only to industry professionals, i'm pleased to offer it now in a new, ultra-concentrated form ten times more potent than any gullible you already have.
concentrating:
	gwendoline is concentrating on something.  hector leans into the panel.
concentration:
	a man is hunched over, reading a book with much concentration
conception:
	 what bizarre conception of the world must occupy your little cat brain, for you to make the decisions that you do?
conceptualize:
	julio yes, on one condition before you go in, as yourself what needs you have in life.  conceptualize all your distinct, legitimate voids.  keep them in mind.  any object in the gift shop must fulfill an existing need in order to come home with us.  hold fast to this standard, and we won't fill the house with crap to throw away later.
conceptualizing:
	andrew you said it - she acts affectionate and friendly, and i'm satisfied with that.  however, her cashew-sized cat brain may be conceptualizing the situation as immaterial, since our existing relationship is perfectly serviceable.  functionally, she loves me!
concert:
	desmond my first project will be refurb'ing the pond to feature waterproof, motion-activated bread-crumb dispensers.  these will work in concert with a mandatory neighborhood old-muffin recycling program.
concessions:
	sign hide from the corporations to make them worried and hope that when they learn we're all right they'll be so relieved that they will give us significant political concessions
concieve:
	octavio i mean anything.  the dumbest thing you can concieve of, i guarantee some nerd is a certified expert at it.
conclusions:
	hildegard so what kinds of?conclusions have you drawn from that?
concordant:
	no craft shall pass unappreciated. it is always worthwhile to pause and intake a thing of beauty. plus, it may spark a concordant idea of one's own.
conditioning:
	she's pulling away!  break the conditioning!  it is legitimately a nice dress!
condo:
	john  hey, remember that condo?  with the pizza?
condoms:
	- the water that scientists have found on mars has been gone for millions of years. also, you appear to be making condoms by mistake.
conduct:
	howard ...and really the point is that this blog is my private space and i should be free to say whatever i want! it's so rude of him to expect me to censor myself just to please his own insecurity.  i certainly don't tell him how to conduct his affairs, and i can't see how it's unreasonable for me to expect the same simple courtesy.  for...
cone:
	 what the--holy crap in a sno-cone!
confessed:
	001001;  murder is confessed
confined:
	this secrecy weighs heavy on my spirit!  must our love be confined to darkness forever?
confines:
	the train races through a town, freed from the confines of railway tracks.
confirm:
	...and clicks <confirm>.
conflict:
	which spurs him into conflict with { a megalomaniacal dictator, a government conspiracy, a profit-obsessed corporation, a sneering wizard, supernatural monsters, computer viruses made real, murderous robots, an army led by a sadist, forces that encourage conformity, a charismatic politician on the rise, humanity's selfish nature, his own insecurity vis-a-vis girls
conformity:
	which spurs him into conflict with { a megalomaniacal dictator, a government conspiracy, a profit-obsessed corporation, a sneering wizard, supernatural monsters, computer viruses made real, murderous robots, an army led by a sadist, forces that encourage conformity, a charismatic politician on the rise, humanity's selfish nature, his own insecurity vis-a-vis girls
confronts:
	norm confronts a typewriter which happens to be the head of a harlequin dancer
confusing:
	 i can't wait to hear what you half-remembered the confusing details of next.
congestive:
	mommy  when science figures out how to cure congestive heart failure.
conglomeration:
	four silent strips, three panels each plus title cards, featuring s.a.m.i.r., the helpful clockwork boy.  s.a.m.i.r. is a conglomeration of machinery in a wagon, and he wears a little hat.
congo:
	later maggie millie!  how are you?  how's the baby? / millie just wonderful!  we've been teaching him lingala, so he'll be uniquely qualified to do humanitarian work in the congo. / maggie but... / millie check and mate
congressionally:
	garth oh, baby!  are you sure that's safe?  there was that whole scandal where the commissioner of the high-speed snooze association was forced to resign after misappropriating $3.8 million congressionally earmarked for snuggle development!
conjugal:
	224224;  conjugal relations factor
conjugations:
	 so tallying up all the conjugations, that's eighty-seven points.
connection:
	ross  i downloaded this app that shuts down my network connection, hides everything on my desktop, and disables every other program except for a bare-bones text editor.
connector:
	calvin  the internet is the great connector!
conquered:
	539539;  circumstances must be conquered
conquering:
	699699; conquering the only enemy
conquest:
	olaf oh, nothing!  just passing through!  looks like you guys made some, um, improvements since i was here scouting the area for conquest- i mean - um - dropping off that muffin basket.
conscience:
	- look, i understand if your faith prohibits you from acting against your conscience.
conserve:
	 conserve 
considerable:
	exterior of jorge sanders' house, which has suffered considerable damage.
consist:
	we now see that fiona's human parts consist of only her head and arm.
consistently:
	despite ridiculous prices and consistently horrible customer service, kinko's somehow stays in business.
consists:
	the strip consists of three photos of people hastily cut from a magazine and stapled to a sheet of paper. boxes, text, and speech bubbles are drawn in sloppily by hand
console:
	the mustachioed man tries to console the duck. the man returns to looking angry.
consonant:
	if obama wins, it'll probably be historic for reasons other than his being the fourteenth (after carter, nixon, jefferson, cleveland, both johnsons, tyler, hayes, jackson, madison, grant, wilson and arguably taylor) to feature palindromic vowel-consonant dispersion.
consonants:
	think of it!  and the first presidential surname with more vowels than consonants!
conspire:
	015015;  events conspire for ill
consquences:
	 next time he'll consider the possible flame-broiled consquences of rash action
constipate:
	- shh, be still. i'm trying to constipate.
constituents:
	- but they may be overtly using their political power to enrich themselves! or at the very least you know they're gonna have a tough time being fair-minded when it comes to representing less-well-off constituents!
constriction:
	 it's sublimation of neural moisture, causing constriction of the blood vessels
construction:
	"3. our simple pattern for the box (left) includes hinged walls held in shape with cotter pins. this way, should you fail to complete construction of the box itself, you may simply remove the pins and place the loose pieces within the general shape of the half-formed box. this recursiveness cuts down on waste."
consul:
	marcus  very well.  a fine consul you have proven to be, benson.  we shall retire, this day, and reconsider our aims.
consulted:
	 look, i know it's your own life and all, but why wasn't i consulted about every detail of it
consulting:
	two fellows stand in a field consulting a map
consumed:
	this year, like every other year, all the treats consumed were safe.
consumes:
	082082;  a child consumes human flesh
contacting:
	inventor four independently-actuated ground-contacting sub-shoes. brushless gear assembly with hot-swappable drive bearings. double camshaft connected to a fully magnetic differential.
contacts:
	 i felt a chill as the ghost swept through me to alight on the distributor cap.  "there is corrosion," it hissed in a voice blasted for centuries by the immortal furnaces of hades, "on the spark plug wire contacts."
contain:
	karl little-known fact toothpaste tubes do not contain toothpaste.  they create toothpaste.
containing:
	a man is pushing a baby carriage containing what appears to be a very large guinea pig
contemplate:
	esteban i said it's time to seriously contemplate suicide
contemplation:
	gibson girl  great--so let me show you the wilfred q. & barbara k. waddlesworth-stoates retreat for academic contemplation & personal self-actualization!
contemporary:
	harry  hey!  turn off that tv!  what did i say about contemporary children's media?
contend:
	nabil meanwhile i have severe biological imperatives to contend with.  i don't have the luxury of having everything below "car" on the hierarchy of needs taken care of.  i'm hungry.  i'm cold.  i'm tired.  i have to go to the bathroom.  please, allow me to address my body's needs before i help with your ego's.
contentment:
	andy no, i took it off my list.  i got to thinking, you know - i'm already too internet-addicted as it is.   i don't really need to check my email at traffic lights.  it'd just be another first-world trinket lashing me to the gotta-stay-informed noise-grid.  i realized, man...i gotta start moving in the opposite direction if i ever want to feel contentment again.
contents:
	a darkened dining room. a table is in the center of the scene, set for dinner. marcus is seated at the table. a standing man is carrying a platter, the contents of which are covered by a bucket.
contest:
	the four finalists in a costume contest are dressed as a native american, the statue of liberty, a valkyrie and a soldier.
context:
	a different photo of a much older person, again with a top hat and a monocle over the right eye (based on context it can be assumed that, in terms of the narrative, this is the same person.)
contexts:
	calvin  here's an example.  joe-blow weirdo had a traumatic childhood.  saw too many "leprechaun" movies in strange contexts and now he's got a mild fetish for dwarves in horror makeup.
contextualize:
	probably looked a bit dazed?  like he was still taking in details about the outside world, and figuring out how to contextualize them?
contiguous:
	[a couple is watching as a cat plays a contiguous mess of sixteenth-notes on the piano]
continents:
	yuri i do not understand how human beings functioned before the invention of pharmaceuticals.  the pyramids!  the great wall of china!  railroads crossing continents!
contingent:
	 punching 4 direct to dvd with foreign distro pre-sold contingent on dean cain's participation
continued:
	continued from the previous comic bea and fernando ride a rail-cart along a track, still holding either irons or lanterns.
continuity:
	 gasp! continuity!
contours:
	 "my pulchritudinous feminine contours"
contra:
	otto all our money has a history.  bribes paid to politicians...hush money paid to victims...drugs and even human beings bought and sold...that money makes its way into our banks.  it carries negativity with it.  someone's starting a business, or buying toys for their baby?  they don't want iran-contra money.  they want nice money.  money with positive energy.
contraband:
	contraband? stolen goods?  illegal ferrets?  drugs?  placebos?  placentas?
contract:
	harold for example, yesterday a guy asked why there's a surcharge for pickups from the airport.  hel-looo!   municipal regulations have stipulated that surcharge ever since it passed the city assembly!  it's completely detailed in the cab company's contract with the airport authority!
contracted:
	 nah, i'm part of a survey group. bunch of scientists track what i eat for a couple years. then they put all the data together and say "ten percent of the coffee drinkers contracted cancer" or whatever.
contractor:
	my uncle used to be a civilian contractor?
contracts:
	candidate i will award lucrative contracts to every crony i can get on the phone. i will make lawyers from every regulatory agency work harder than they ever have in their lives.
contradiction:
	winston  or, are we meant to take "for goodness' sake" literally?  in that case, the song is a contradiction.
contributes:
	woman trying to find what contributes to illnesses.
contributing:
	wilbur (aloud)  when you shoot me full of arrows, i feel like we aren't contributing equally to the health of this relationshaaaooww
controlling:
	donny last year, your brother sacrificed himself to save the planet. / thank god he was able to destroy the alien robots controlling our lending markets and restore the world to prosperity!
controls:
	captain  there's nothin' i can do!  somethin's fouling up my controls!
controversial:
	 tooth magazine folded in '89 when advertisers withdrew their support following the publishing of a controversial illustration featuring c. everett koop driving a bulldozer through tianenmen square. the caption 'fluoride uber alles'
controversy:
	simon  teach the controversy.
conveniently:
	with this one, even if you do send it in, we'll conveniently "lose" your original upc and claim we never got it.
conversationalist:
	will you teach your children the spoken language of the mighty horse, so she is not the last conversationalist of her strange and lilting dialect?
conversely:
	 conversely, everyone quieter than you may actually be tolerable to be around
converses:
	an older man in a train converses with a boy standing next to the tracks.
conversion:
	the conversion. is impossible. don't even try it.
converted:
	biff ...and i've also converted all of my zeppelins to run on earwax.
converter:
	what a crazy year it's been!  at ace we've had some real challenges.  bill, our muffler expert, suffered a hernia while lifting a catalytic converter--right during our busy "may is for mufflers" promotion!  but we still managed to set a sales record that big al...(cut off)...will be proud of.  our office...
converting:
	a banner at the top says "converting everything to coal power [how to do it terribly - expensively - and with great difficulty]"
convey:
	john and doesn't having fielders convey a lack of confidence in the pitcher?  "we really don't think you can throw a no-hitter, so we put eight other guys out there to clean up your messes."  "don't try hard or anything."  oh and hey, what if the pitcher started using a tennis ball?  just like whipped it out?  you think anyone'd notice?
conveyor:
	a conveyor belt "8. he paid $200 for this five years ago and never even used it. throw it in the garden and see if he even notices it's gone."
cooked:
	lucky marge i don't want my beef cooked so much as run through a warm room.
cooks:
	- ha ha. so your dad cooks for once. give him a break.
coolest:
	you're the coolest grandpa ever!
coolidge:
	for years it seemed like nobody could beat fifty percent--coolidge, pierce, eisenhower, reagan, you know all those tired old names--but obama's poised to shatter that record!
cooling:
	 through the quiet crackle of cooling embers she thought she almost heard him weeping. but it was probably just a faint hiss of steam, or else the wind, or else the sorrowful ghosts of her long year full of many purposeful misdeeds
coolly:
	  he coolly flicks a cigarette butt over the edge, turning and walking away before the mark has even hit bottom.  the hundred grand will be in his bank account by the time he reaches his car. 
cooperate:
	"hopefully, for the moment if nothing more, we can set aside our differences and cooperate for the good of us all."
cooties:
	 also not having attended earth kindergarten he would not have developed an immunity to cooties
cope:
	- how tragic! a victim of society's scorn, you cope with the stigma by drowning your sorrow's in further consumption!
copied:
	- i copied it from a menu someone hung on my doorknob! i think it's double awesome.
copies:
	1. i own close to 100 copies of vanilla ice's autobiography (when i learned it was ghost-written by his manager tommy quon, i lost all interest in being a distributor).
copper:
	mack  once lightning hits our rod, the charge will travel down the copper gutters, superheat the doorknob assembly, and momentarily soften the deadbolt enough for me to batter the door open.
copperplate:
	horace ?i look around the store and i realize why i'm kind of dizzy.  the sign on the counter is in comic sans.  on the window it's copperplate gothic.  and on the receipt it's monotype corsiva.  monotype corsiva!  so i said that's it!  i'll never again patronize any business that uses any typeface i can recognize!
copter:
	he lifts off, copter blades spinning furiously.
copyright:
	 technically, he would have to bring a suit on behalf of the copyright holder
copywriter:
	chad  that copywriter must be grinning like a chimp to know that his or her creative work is an indelible part of an entire generation.
cordon:
	cops trying to cordon off the main plaza but people are throwing bottles #downtownriots
cords:
	alan your voice...it sounds kind of like a gaxian who is pretty good at shape-shifting his vocal cords, but not great.
cordwood:
	(2) carve the necessary implements from a piece of dry cordwood (fig. 1). always try the wood before cutting into it, to ascerta way the grain runs. in clear basswood it is usually quite straight, but sometimes it runs at a slight angle. 
cork:
	lois actually, philosophers call that the oenophile's quandary!  presented with something that, over time, increases in quality (like wine) or in value (like money in a savings account), when's the right time to use it?  if you're saving for a rainy day, how hard does it have to rain before that's it?  and as the item gains worth, wouldn't it have to rain harder and harder before it makes sense to pop that cork?
corneas:
	doctor i'm afraid we're going to have to remove his kidney immediately. also, his liver, pancreas, lungs, corneas, and heart.
corners:
	she lurks at the corners of vision, always circling, always prowling.  she does not let herself be seen.
cornys:
	- got some nice midwestern brown, think i still got some cornys left too.
corporeal:
	593593;  mike is corporeal
corpses:
	  walforth barber academy!  we buy hairy corpses; enquire within.
correspond:
	- dearest john, i write this not because i have any great desire to correspond with you, not yo hear from you...
corresponded:
	eugene the dollars in jefferson's and ford's times were on the gold standard!  they corresponded to specific lumps of metal in fort knox!  your arrogant attempt to place yourself at the crossroads of history must begin in 1933 at the earliest!
corroded:
	a kind of poncho is shown. gossamer waterproof garments. get the genuine! beware of worthless imitations! rival garments are made of acid-treated poison cloth. ours are safe and nurturing to your babylike skin. don't you deserve not to have your skin corroded off by the competition? masochists need not respond. we don't want your business. this is a nice place. gossamer clothing co, 28 devonshire st., boston, ma.
corrosion:
	 i felt a chill as the ghost swept through me to alight on the distributor cap.  "there is corrosion," it hissed in a voice blasted for centuries by the immortal furnaces of hades, "on the spark plug wire contacts."
corsets:
	 note for international readers hot topic is a store found in suburban shopping malls.  they sell a bizarre combination of naughty novelties, goth gear like corsets and boots, and trendy logo shirts with 'clever' sayings and nintendo characters and the emblems of punk rock bands that were big a decade before the average customer was born.  it is the dictionary definition of over-the-counter counterculture.
corvette:
	- i'm built like a corvette
cosmic:
	gax did you forget?  we had plans to go cosmic bowling!
costly:
	will you do it, barnes?  will you adopt her for me?  and feed her, and brush her, and tend to her costly, myriad and unusual medical needs?
costumes:
	rolf if you see movement, call it in.  if you see a squirrel, call it in.  if you see two weird-looking leaves in a row, call it in.  if you see adorable deer frolicking lustily in a meadow, it is probably enemy agents in rented costumes trying to lower your guard.  shoot them and then call it in.
cotter:
	"3. our simple pattern for the box (left) includes hinged walls held in shape with cotter pins. this way, should you fail to complete construction of the box itself, you may simply remove the pins and place the loose pieces within the general shape of the half-formed box. this recursiveness cuts down on waste."
cotton:
	leonard we use handkerchiefs now, instead of kleenex.  and washable cotton rags instead of paper towels.
counterculture:
	 note for international readers hot topic is a store found in suburban shopping malls.  they sell a bizarre combination of naughty novelties, goth gear like corsets and boots, and trendy logo shirts with 'clever' sayings and nintendo characters and the emblems of punk rock bands that were big a decade before the average customer was born.  it is the dictionary definition of over-the-counter counterculture.
counterparts:
	helene we've come a long way towards making healthy, all-natural foods taste just as good as their over-processed counterparts.
countries:
	charles that is a very nice-sounding theory that i'm not convinced is actually true. / that is how countries start wars. / do you ever finish any of the crazy things you dive into?
countryside:
	high over the countryside, thad meets norman coming the other way on his own flying contraption, which is completely different from thad's.
county:
	garth all right.  gimme like two hours to finish reading this article about county fairs.
coupled:
	mindy a couple of bucks won't solve anything.  you'll just spend it on booze, right?  so you can blot out the reality of your sorry existence?  the only real solution to the problem of homelessness involves counseling coupled with mental health therapy and free, comprehensive addiction treatment when needed.
courage:
	courage, howie.  go ahead.  drop it in.
courier:
	a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild ocd, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert
courteous:
	604604; the courteous guest
courtroom:
	bart you've been asking me that for months and i think i finally have the answer.  a courtroom sketch artist.
courts:
	bruce we will need to perform a complex and incredibly expensive musical exorcism.  luckily, i just happen to be in a band!  we can probably squeeze you in between our incredibly important gigs in the courts of popes worldwide
cousin:
	jim-bob  are we related?  maybe they're some cousin i've never met?
covera:
	yuri the flat brush will give me good covera--
coveted:
	020020;  an heirloom is coveted
cowboy:
	kyra  i've had enough cowboy fetishism for one decade, thank you very much.
cowering:
	a king and woman, among several other bystanders, are gathered around a set of stairs, upon which an older man is cowering in fear behind a set of curtains, which the woman has pulled back.
coyote:
	keith billy swerved to avoid hitting a coyote and ran the chevelle off the road.  great plumes of dust, lit red by the setting sun.  we never saw the hill.  we never saw the cliff.
cozy:
	man 1 ...it's our first holiday season in the new house. super nice, super cozy. and then we get the first card. a holiday card addressed to the prior occupants, the taylors.
crackers:
	 at ihop, ketchup and water and lemons and crackers and ranch dressing are all free
cracking:
	a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild ocd, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert
crackle:
	 through the quiet crackle of cooling embers she thought she almost heard him weeping. but it was probably just a faint hiss of steam, or else the wind, or else the sorrowful ghosts of her long year full of many purposeful misdeeds
cradling:
	man with beard and hat enters, cradling a flugel
crafter:
	a poster reads "a codified set of the builder's, crafter's makers rules." a list follows
craftsmanship:
	fur collar  the recontextualization of not just disposable but disposed of victorian imagery in the milieu of 21st century web-based publication and distribution is a baldly ironic statement of luddite intransigence, but with a humanizing layer of nostalgia and longing for vanished standards of craftsmanship and civility
crafty:
	britney how positively crafty of you!  i never knew you had a hidden blue-collar side.  you don't actually keep animals here, do you?  filthy creatures, i'm positively intolerant.
craigslist:
	 but the craigslist thing said to just pull around back to the loading dock! that's what we did
crammed:
	marilu's response john is crammed into the waste-basket.
cramped:
	skip nothing worse, right?  cramped space, uncomfortable seats, and some little rugrat just screaming bloody murder like it's a washcloth being wrung out.   well, my invention is a special hood that fits securely around the baby's upper region to effectively muffle any disruptive noises that might disturb fellow passengers.
crandall:
	- as utter non-existance goes, i'm glad you went for the medium size. it fits just right in my breakfast nook. say hi to uncle crandall. julie
crappykins:
	standing  what the -- ah, crappykins. last time i do that in the dark.
crated:
	jack 'aged cheddar.'  so apparently there's crates of cheddar sitting around somewhere, just aging.  what if society ends and no new cheddar is crated away to age?  how would we remnants of humanity decide when to eat what limited supply remains?
crater:
	"maybe just stand next to him and say real loudly to someone else "my favourite sexual position is with a werewolf in a crater.""
cratered:
	count twiggy when the moon hangs full...when its cratered surface spews maddening light upon the midnight land below...this becomes a cat!
crates:
	jack 'aged cheddar.'  so apparently there's crates of cheddar sitting around somewhere, just aging.  what if society ends and no new cheddar is crated away to age?  how would we remnants of humanity decide when to eat what limited supply remains?
crave:
	 crave 
crawl:
	 crawl over to 
crazies:
	alvin i told you to be more uptight with your gardening!  you're inviting in all sorts of crazies.  what with your assorted wildflowers.
craziest:
	 the future is written by the ones who follow the craziest ideas.
creativity:
	 save your creativity for your livejournal. here at work we pour vodka into old milk and when we do it we smile
cred:
	tall  aah my indie cred
credentialed:
	instructor  at the walforth barber academy, our credentialed graduates coif kings, popes and emperor-pope-kings.
credibility:
	thus undermining your credibility further.
cremation:
	leon that's why i should be your first choice for pet surgery!  i'll display an inhuman detachment during your snookie's suffering, or you get half off your first cremation!   leon's budget veterinary - on sixth, upstairs from payday-loans-n-go!
crept:
	madge cautiously they crept around the corner.  was that squealing the sound of...a ghost?
cretins:
	old  bah!  you cretins!  there is no natural order!  all is bathed in chaos from the first day of creation till the last!
crib:
	a new mother leans over a crib, where her child sleeps.
cribbed:
	 maybe now is not the best time to mention that i honestly found your descriptions of my many heroic deeds both 1) a little over the top with the magic and 2) cribbed entirely from a harry potter book
crichton:
	 someone's been reading michael crichton's timeline
cricket:
	delia i don?t know?maybe like a cricket farting or something?
crimes:
	candidate i will require my own dedicated branch of the justice department just to classify my crimes.
criminally:
	bart think about the weddings we've attended recently.  apparently everybody believes the event will be criminally under-documented.  everyone's watching the ceremony through their camera.  might as well be watching on tv.  at our wedding, we collect cameras at the door.  we frisk people.
criminals:
	diane i see the appeal, but there's a strange stilted undercurrent of being treated like criminals at our wedding.
cringe:
	son of tree aaahh, dad. <<cringe of embarrassment>> we are not going to have this conversation right now!!
crinkled:
	 if we can just get this crinkled mess into the large hadron collider we will never have to buy toothpaste again
cripes:
	lefty for cripes sakes, perkins.
crises:
	woman  everyone's talking about how these things should have been *predicted*, should have been *stopped*.  seems so obvious in hindsight.  so what regulations are going unenforced *right this second*?  what abuses are people *noticing* but not mentioning?  what crises yet to come are still *preventable*?
crisp:
	dwight sure, the first person to eat a pumpkin probably did s because it was there.  it was a crisp october day?the only sound the crunching of leaves and the slightly squishier sound of the very first pumpkin being et.
crispy:
	- a crispy, tasty-smelling, probably-delicious lesson.
critic:
	i kept going back over it, never satisfied, being my own worst critic...
critically:
	 like so many of us, convincing himself that his job is critically important to the world is the only thing that gets herve out of bed and into that stanky diving gear every morning.
crocker:
	francine  maybe because mine are homemade?  no store-bought dough for me, just good ol' betty crocker mix.  and they're delicious!
croissant:
	jordan most likely to power his croissant bakery with perpetually clean-burning jewel energy!
croquet:
	  ah!  our scouts report that the enemy commander is far too busy walloping his troops with a croquet-mallet to mount a proper offensive at the moment.  do invite him for tea
crosscut:
	mrs. detwiler lies on a bed; jeb stands over here with a crosscut saw. / jeb how are you feeling, mrs. detwiler? / i'm just heading over to review your x-rays.  we'll start surgery in about an hour...is something the matter?
crossed:
	a woman cries out to a man who stands with his arms crossed, his back to her
crossover:
	 has anyone ever done a roshambo/rashomon crossover?  ?i won? ?no, *i* won?
crossroads:
	eugene the dollars in jefferson's and ford's times were on the gold standard!  they corresponded to specific lumps of metal in fort knox!  your arrogant attempt to place yourself at the crossroads of history must begin in 1933 at the earliest!
crossword:
	closeup of a crossword puzzle.  21 down and 39 across are incomplete, showing _ere__ and eae_ea, respectively.
crouch:
	back home, herman has to crouch down low just to fit inside the living room.  he towers over his sad-looking wife/girlfriend/partner.
crouched:
	a man and woman are crouched in front of a tombstone
crouches:
	a man looks at the sign; then crouches next to a cat with a ruler
crouching:
	woman is now crouching behind the table
crouton:
	  the bird was hoping for a little piece of crouton or something, but absent that, will happily take that hat.
croutons:
	extra croutons and a lemon wedge.
crow:
	503503;  a crow drinks off-panel
crowing:
	center dunk me a drumstick! are you crowing for dawn, or is this the straight bacon?
crowning:
	two aliens with long spiky feathers crowning their bird-style feathered heads address a middle-aged woman with her hair pulled back severely, dressed in a long-sleeved dark dress with an apron.  she is holding a round serving tray in her right hand, angled against her body, and has her left arm akimbo. she responds to them in a matter-of-fact yet kindly manner.
crucial:
	300300 a crucial message
crucified:
	jesus ah, you know, i got crucified last night.
crude:
	elle we didn't go into iraq for crude oil.  we went for lipids in general.
cruel:
	yuri enslaved by a cruel monarch!  worked to death by thirty!  but i bet their sinuses were clear as hell!
cruelties:
	- oh my god.  am i on some kind of hidden camera reality show?  "don't vomit at the sight of nature's cruelties"?
crumbly:
	- what the... come on, this is day-old at best! it's really tough, all the tips are getting crumbly... what kind of crap are trying to sell here?
crumple:
	 crumple it up 
crunching:
	dwight sure, the first person to eat a pumpkin probably did s because it was there.  it was a crisp october day?the only sound the crunching of leaves and the slightly squishier sound of the very first pumpkin being et.
crunchy:
	i swear, getting you to move is like a lame, one-legged ancestor of a sloth who's twice as slow trying to use a frayed old piece of crunchy vine to pull a cruise ship!
crush:
	terry faithfully-recreated goals.  realistic dreams.  comes with a full set of aspirations, that, as the puppeteer, you can fulfill or crush at your discretion.  "i wanted to be an ice-cream flavor tester!"  "not even a superstar!  just a solid 9-to-5 at dreyer's that pays the bills."
crusting:
	- it's crusting already, be dry soon. are you lost?
crybaby:
	mr. kabob  blah blah blah boo-hoo crybaby wants everything for nothing.  you know how expensive it is to rent a retail stall at a major airport?  if we charged street prices we'd be broke in a week.
cryo:
	a big metal cylinder marked cryo-stor (tm) holds the frozen body of a bearded man.
cryogenics:
	  cryogenics conceives of the future as florida  a place where old people go to just putter around
cryptic:
	phoebe  for i'll reveal the strange principles i live by!  i'll make cryptic references to half-completed masterpieces!
cryptography:
	dora well, it was a cryptography class.
crystalline:
	 optionally, they can be prepared drizzled with artisanal peppercorn shavings, or sprinkled with crushed crystalline minerals.  zagat take notice
cuban:
	dawn too late!  old news!  health care is the biggest problem facing our society since dukakis rode a tank!  grave pronouncements are hitting the media at rates unseen since the cuban missile crisis!
cubicles:
	their cubicles shall become dung-hills and their parking garage a wasteland  i am the lord.
cucumber:
	 supposedly the cucumber is the only food that contains every necessary nutrient, albeit in trace amounts for some. so if you're going to restrict yourself to a single food, twenty pounds of cucumbers is a reasonably smart choice.
cuddle:
	garth well, you don't know if maybe the cuddle inspector is some appointed crony of his or something!  maybe the cuddles haven't been inspected for weeks!  ya might never get to snoozyville because the cuddles all freeze up halfway between bakersfield and fresno!
cuddly:
	woman who's a cuddly little snookums?
cues:
	deb how do you know?  all you have to go on are anthropomorphized cues.  she seems affectionate, she seems friendly, but she is an animal and likely does not understand the concept of love as humans define it.
cuisines:
	vlad you just played a hungry-man last turn!  you're making up rules again.  we haven't voted on lean cuisines yet.
culling:
	man 2 before the culling
culminating:
	culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.
cult:
	 i never knew that weddings were a cargo cult, where if you get something wrong with the napkins then god refuses to sanctify the union.
cultivate:
	prudence  do you know how long it took me to cultivate those magic beans?
cultivated:
	dwight but now pumpkins are cultivated.  we buy them from india.  you could get a pumpkin on valentine's day, if you wanted.
culturally:
	 why is there no culturally acceptable way to say "you gonna finish that spaghetti?" why is it such a taboo to be concerned about wasting food?
cupboard:
	voicemail let the liquid harden into a gel in a cool cupboard  in seven to ten days, you will receive a packet of seeds.  plant the seeds in the gel in the shape of a regular heptagon.
cupcake:
	mikey nobody trusts the eater to be able to handle a cupcake with a darker, more unpleasant flavor!  everyone wants chocolate and vanilla and sugar, sugar, sugar.  life is not just sugar!  real life has vinegar and mustard and salt!
cupholder:
	julio on the drive over, i was holding my travel-mug in my, uh, in my crotch - you know how bad the cupholder is in that car.
curiously:
	 but curiously he still eliminates right on schedule
curries:
	sanjay  for me it would be indian food  curries, rice and lentils.
cursed:
	umberto i suppose it should more properly be called a cursed eye
curses:
	josh great beasts with fearsome claws, belching flame and calling down curses from before the days of man!
custard:
	- this custard is tasty, but i can't help but wonder... if perhaps... ahem... your own flavor might be even sweeter.
custody:
	@jenny hauled into custody.  they'll never get me to talk #downtownriots
custom:
	alt text fine. wintergreen? how about custom packages of tic tacs? folks can rattle them when they want us to kiss! --jason are you trying to give me a migraine
customize:
	mario let him!  he'll find a citation with today's date for this exact point on the street.  photoshop lets me customize it for anywhere i park.
customs:
	ape  as a scholar of your language, customs and technology, i have learned enough in three days to fill dozens of textbooks back home.
cutesy:
	andy okay, skip the cutesy alien schtick.  what's the message?  is it about the border fence?
cyber:
	your title is "the { chrono, neuro, aero, cosmo, reve, necro, cyber, astro, psycho, steam, meta, black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, war} s."
cyborg:
	dwight  i think our daughter might be a cyborg sent from the future to exterminate humanity.
cycle:
	 the video is called 'wagner's ring cycle as performed by a tugboat'
cylindrical:
	inside a brick-walled room, presumably inside the official building from panel 1. there is a trunk stage up-right. rod is in front of the trunk, and amos is in a cylindrical cage beside the trunk.
cynical:
	radislov what if i told you i'd written an investment book not geared towards gullible suckers?  one specifically for cynical, pragmatic types?
cysts:
	bernardo got cysts in my gut. calcium in my gallbladder. spurs in my joints. some kind of parasite living in my spine, and over a dozen different types of gout.
da:
	apparatchik komrade kringle! perheps i tink ve should do more of de party fundraising and less of de party line, da?
daaad:
	son but daaad i need money to trick out my civic
dads:
	 dads!! so full of tricks!!
dah:
	- ya dah tee...
dahc:
	- sah hah bahd ihssit, theh, dahc?
daintly:
	man pokes head into panel; looks at cat. cat daintly raises paw. sixteenth notes return to background of panel.
dallying:
	dr. monroe none of this dallying!  how will you be bettering yourself in the coming year?  out with it before my belt comes out with it!
dammit:
	malki ! why do we do this? some might say it's because we're crazy ... well, if caring about your customers is crazy, then we don't want to be ... dammit! line?
damn:
	man with monocle and top hat ...and the tumor was this big!  he literally only had seconds to live.  so, like any good doctor would, i pointed to the sky and yelled "hey, tumor, look at that" and then wrestled that damn neoplasm to the ground!  and...then...
dancer:
	norm confronts a typewriter which happens to be the head of a harlequin dancer
dandruff:
	bart that way, the attendees can actually be present!  meanwhile, the sketch artist will sit in the corner and capture impressions of the ceremony.  later on we'll send everybody a booklet of the drawings.  moments filtered in chalk, not razor-sharp photos of everybody's dandruff.
dandy:
	- being a dandy shepherd, that's the life for me.
dangling:
	our man peeks from behind his desk chair at work. a pig has been hung from the ceiling by its hind leg, dangling in the space our man would occupy, were he sitting. a colleague stands in front of the desk, looking on, bemused.
daniel:
	025025;  daniel faces danger
danny:
	danny there are always a lot of moving vans on our street.
dante:
	jennifer preparing to fire dante, a spaniel today is my birthday.  i can do whatever i want
darfur:
	joe the country's industries have shut down.  the daily death rate exceeds darfur's.  just goes to show it takes total commitment.
darkened:
	a darkened dining room. a table is in the center of the scene, set for dinner. marcus is seated at the table. a standing man is carrying a platter, the contents of which are covered by a bucket.
darker:
	mikey nobody trusts the eater to be able to handle a cupcake with a darker, more unpleasant flavor!  everyone wants chocolate and vanilla and sugar, sugar, sugar.  life is not just sugar!  real life has vinegar and mustard and salt!
darkest:
	jeff  let me ask you something, lester.  there is a beast that visits me in the darkest part of my dreams.
darndest:
	221221;  a kid says a darndest thing
darryl:
	- morning, darryl. how goes the latest money-making scheme?
dart:
	 the answer, by the way, is three one to stop traffic, one to dart across, and one to stay behind and answer the door.
darth:
	edwin no, i thought she would reciprocate by getting me a darth vader mediation egg for the living room.
darwin:
	 the darwin awards are the only awards that take only one vote to win.
dash:
	jason try amping up the sincerity.  else i may dash my worthless body on the rocks!
dates:
	stavros  for me it would be mediterreanean olives, yougurts, figs and dates!
dating:
	man 1 boxing day in canada is a tradition dating back for thousands of years.
daub:
	(5) tie off arm above the elbow and tap to make the basilic vein bulge. daub with iodine and give the needle-crank three full turns.
daughters:
	jimbo please!  help!  barbarians have attacked our village!  our sons have been lost to their swords, our daughters to their lusts...
dawdle:
	- that's it... slowly... i said slowly, not dawdle!
dawned:
	alphonse  indeed!  so far every morning of the year has dawned beautifully and fine.  such wonderful beginnings!
dawning:
	man makes a dawning realization
daylight:
	six months of daylight followed by six months of darkness.
daytime:
	 spend your daytime minutes at 
dazed:
	probably looked a bit dazed?  like he was still taking in details about the outside world, and figuring out how to contextualize them?
deadbolt:
	mack  once lightning hits our rod, the charge will travel down the copper gutters, superheat the doorknob assembly, and momentarily soften the deadbolt enough for me to batter the door open.
deaden:
	leon gently caressing the horse buttercup you can't be a veterinarian if you love animals.  always seeing them in pain...and so often knowing there's nothing you can do... ...it would deaden your sensitivity to the preciousness of all the earth's living things.
deadliest:
	745745; the deadliest puppy butt
dealership:
	martha  isn't it weird how car-dealership jingles are implanted more firmly than pretty much anything else we learned as a child?
deals:
	 killer deals 
dealth:
	hey, did you ever get that fix-it ticket dealth with?  the burnt-out brake light?
deathbed:
	marvin my resentful attitude toward fatherhood will yield spiteful and maladjusted children. on my deathbed, i will plead with them for reconciliation. to no avail.
debased:
	vince i don't know, it seems to me that any pun or permutation of the 'girls gone wild' concept would just be inherently in poor taste, especially at marketing directed at children.  also, it sends the tacit message that 'girls gone wild' is a normal and acceptable part of our culture - when in fact it's seedy trash that thrives on the most crass and debased elements of human nature.
debated:
	067067;  brazenness is debated
debit:
	otto so, earlier, when i swiped my debit card in the cab, i transferred to the driver part of henry ford's profit from the sale of the first model t.  later, i bought a bag of fun-size snickers with the same dollar thomas jefferson used to buy point-oh-seven square miles of louisiana!
debtor:
	by noon his entire debtor roster is casually milling around his house, hoping to "accidentally" encounter him before he has an aneurysm.
decadent:
	nabil washing the car!  how decadent!  so great that you have no more pressing problems than making sure your giant optional machine is free of specks of dust!
decaf:
	darrell iced decaf grande raspberry soy no-whip light-ice mocha!
decals:
	terry "i even got so far as taking the test.  but it turns out i don't have any taste buds."  "i am made of injection-molded plastic slapped with acrylic paint and cheap decals to appear alive."
decathalon:
	 he bought the civic in a fit of joy after winning the academic decathalon
decaying:
	730730; the decaying currency
decides:
	girl if everybody gets to turn their poetry into a lucrative career, hadn't we better hope someone decides to take up sewage treatment as a hobby?
decieve:
	 once you grow up, you have to just sit around all day figuring out how your children are trying to decieve you.  if you let your guard down even for a moment, all of a sudden they are seventeen years old breaking the lock on your toolshed and selling your power tools for meth money.
decipher:
	 decipher  /  i don't know who she thinks she's fooling but those spiracles are not real.
deciphering:
	dan  hey, josiah's good at deciphering this stuff.  what does this say?
decks:
	a squareish design is shown, divided into parts, that say "carpet," "wood," "c8, ny," and "621 b'way." parquet and inlaid floors, borders for rugs, baseboards, decks, crown molding, doors, anything wood feeds our weird fetish.
declarations:
	applications noise, meat, smug declarations, places i'll never go, hats, bears
decline:
	gustavo i'm sorry, sir, your card was declined. / todd that's impossible!  are you certain? / gustavo absolutely, sir.  it was the rare super decline.  the machine asked us to rinse it down with alcohol afterward.
declined:
	gustavo i'm sorry, sir, your card was declined. / todd that's impossible!  are you certain? / gustavo absolutely, sir.  it was the rare super decline.  the machine asked us to rinse it down with alcohol afterward.
declining:
	 the man on the far left is is declining a refill from a jeweled vial of tears collected from the woman second from the right
decode:
	dora so he sits there squinting at his hands the whole time, trying to decode the textbook... really a totally unworkable solution.   he barely managed a c-plus.
decontaminant:
	ashton  bring in the decontaminant scrub!
decor:
	i like this place.  humble.  not a lot wasted on decor.
decorated:
	we see a commemorative plate on a stand. it's decorated with an american flag and a bald eagle, and the legend the chosen land.
decoration:
	fine furniture, upholstery and decoration. we will describe nice things to you, so you can pretend to own them with a sense of authority. 621 broadway, new-york.
decorations:
	 she will not be putting the snowman decorations back in the yard for marchmas.
decoys:
	rhonda there ain't no fat man in a big red suit.  i mean there's men, in malls around the world, but they ain't santa.  they're just doubles.  decoys.  like saddam.  agents.  puppets on a string.  on my string.
dede:
	dede frazzled martin that was a metaphor.
dedication:
	professor i first made the acquaintance of young master malki ! when he came under my tutelage at oxford -- introduction to mad biochemistry, as i recall. frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. "malki !, my lad," i told him on more than one occasion, "if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then i fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world." but some boys just refuse to listen.
deduce:
	woman you're a smart guy. you can analyze the situation. deduce how to act natural.
deduction:
	elmer used to be, cashiers had to count change backwards.  start with the price of the item, then add coins and bills as necessary to add up to the amount you'd given them.  it's a more accurate method!  now, their registers tell them how much change to give out.  you have to hope your cashier can correctly assemble unusual amounts at a moment's notice.  because there's no deduction involved, the process becomes rote and prone to error!
deed:
	larry got scrooge's own house!  just handed him the deed!
deeds:
	 maybe now is not the best time to mention that i honestly found your descriptions of my many heroic deeds both 1) a little over the top with the magic and 2) cribbed entirely from a harry potter book
deeealer:
	he's your friendly ford deeealer
deepankar:
	deepankar well, you didn't know he'd have the papers with him.
deepen:
	phoebe  oh, i'll grant an interview once a decade or so.  but each appearance will only deepen the enigma.
defeat:
	jesus thanks, but i can't. i have to defeat you and return to life to save the souls of the world.
defecating:
	mike a massive rabbit, evidently defecating an equally large egg 'bout to make your dreams come true, little lady!
defended:
	147147;  janey's honor is defended
defenseless:
	bobby i bet my dumb parents never slaughtered a defenseless fishing village and took their women for scullery maids!
defiantly:
	the accused glares defiantly as his beard is sheared away.
deficiency:
	nelson  i have a nutritional deficiency.  i must supplement my diet with a rare mineral found only in human suffering.
deficit:
	grandpa all right, then set this down i live with a woman name of mabel herschfeld who is a type of creature to eat the last piece of carrot stick and put the empty bag back in the icebox. this speaks of some manner of *deficit*.
defies:
	513513;  fatigue defies reason
defiled:
	fidelity mutual hath defiled themselves before me.  thou shalt put their executive board to the sword.
degenerative:
	newspaper text such are the benefits afforded us all by the unending march of progress, that each new dawn finds many a person safe, fed, clothed and sheltered. a citizen of our modern era rarely finds him- or herself in a deadly battle for survival, as was common for the first generations of mankind. thus do our bodies, evolved for and hardened by constant struggle, often find themselves idle; and without some constant whetting, thus swiftly begins the degenerative process of death.
dehumanizing:
	black  i know recrimination doesn't solve matters, but i'm finding it very hard not to blame you for everything. uprooting whole cultures, transporting them across the globe, dehumanizing an entire race.
deimos:
	- oh, hey, deimos. thought you were jamie.
deli:
	- no, i mean i can't fill your prescription because this is a deli counter.
deliberate:
	ariel misbehavior has become his palette, our apartment his canvas, in a grand, grotesque installation - featuring us as predictable foils, our fury as much a deliberate part of the work as each precisely-browned fiber of shag.  more than a simple befoulment - this is a befoulment of order, a metaphorical poop-smear on the very notion of animal subjugation.
delicately:
	simon, who will...  free-range hen eggs delicately cracked into a porcelain bowl, the yolk and albumen whipped until smooth with a silver whisk, then seared on a steaming griddle until golden and fluffy.
delightfully:
	len i'm not after fine.  i'm after delightfully amazing.  i know it can be better.
delinquent:
	sol  impossible!  you've been delinquent for months!
delivered:
	423423;  a warning is delivered
delivers:
	085085;  the letter-carrier delivers love
delousing:
	woman 2 of course you do.  the school don't want no lices neither.  anything this world teaches you to recite or sing or parrot back is just for purposes of the mass delousing of crowds.
deluded:
	arthur life is chaos and pain!  anyone who's not depressed is either deluded or an idiot!
delusion:
	barbara fiction is the creation of falsehoods for the delusion of children.  this james is half a man, he's written' some useful tract on a better way to plow a field or such
demanded:
	145145;  kisses are demanded
democratically:
	barry imagine, a year from now, one of us will be the democratically-elected chancellor of the barnyard.
demonic:
	jesus christ, lord of all humanity, speaks with the beautifully demonic fallen angel lucifer in the cave-like bowels of hell.
demonization:
	prudence  the hyperbolic demonization of the opposition!
demoralize:
	a large picture shows a box full of stuff, captioned "why let the detritus of previous failed projects clutter up your workspace and demoralize you? put it away for good." "build a junk box - for all your unifinished projects"
demure:
	a girl addresses her demure lady cat while a wild tomcat looks on.
deniability:
	 plausible deniability 
denial:
	366366;  mark faces denial
denied:
	579579;  credit is denied
denise:
	malki ! thank god that's done! higgins, where's my goddamn appletini?! denise, cancel my appointments. and fire higgins.
dente:
	- so it's a little al dente.
dentistry:
	054054;  dentistry is practiced
dentists:
	  george washington's hatred for dentists boils yet from his grave.
denyin:
	woman we're rockin' it we're rollin' it we're dryin' it denyin' it ...the right to be wet anymore
deodorant:
	shopkeeper man, i've been selling clean out of deodorant, hand lotion, and perfume! / i swear, it's like people been throwing it away.
depart:
	they depart, leaving a lovely trophy.
departed:
	bruce let me commune with the energies of the departed.  please lower the lights - yes.  yes.  i feel the presence of an energy from beyond this world!
departs:
	evening; robb departs from a building.   around the corner lurks a fruity-lookin' dude in a cape.
depicting:
	three pictures on the side state "cut it", "hit it", and "stuff it", depicting a screwdriver of some sort, a hammer hitting a nail, and two hands grasping a piece of wood.
depleted:
	 and my colleagues who put used needles into bananas and depleted uranium into grapes aren't doing any better!!
deported:
	alien girl that...that isn't very funny.  are you sure this is a good idea? / nerd hu don't question me, woman, or i'll have you deported back to venus.
deposited:
	"unless ten billion dollars is deposited into the following swiss bank account."  i don't know, it's sort of cold.
depressing:
	 i suppose it would just be depressing to keep a tally of how often this happens to me
depression:
	leslie another depression day.  god, i hate getting it rubbed in my face that people are so gullible.  
der:
	jimmy he hears "der biepbiep biep biepbiepbieperzung biep biep biepen biepenschlauf biep biepinzingerunting."
derails:
	walt breaking news.  tragedy strikes eastern europe as a trainload of irradiated hamsters derails in the former soviet republic of georgia.
derided:
	484484;  a genre is derided
derisive:
	  of course there is plenty of criticism to which derisive laughter is the only appropriate response.
derivations:
	 your dream-me is within two standard metaphor-derivations of how you really feel about me.
derivative:
	ginny i don't know what those are!  i'm putting this new thing out there.  why does everything have to be derivative?  why are you pushing me to conform into some stale old mold?  got to match your hundred-year-old expectations?
derivatives:
	marc i'm distrustful of fluoride and fluoride derivatives!
derived:
	clara my beef is with books and "systems" that claim to teach you how to become rich like the author, when the author's wealth is actually derived from the sales of the books themselves.
derrieres:
	  um, only the commissioner of butts, heinies and derrieres?
descend:
	two piranhas descend from heaven.
descends:
	joanne ?and over here i'll be knocking through the wall to open the kitchen into the living room.  it'll be fully open, but with a retractable bar that descends from the ceiling for parties, or just for breakfast.
describing:
	- essentially you're describing how a civilized society functions despite the presence of individual ego.
deserved:
	 a fiat currency deserved fiat history
deserves:
	 any princess who can tame this beast deserves to rule a nation.
deserving:
	i do not trust your taste in "things deserving of note."
deset:
	- "i have hated esau; i have made his hill country a desolation, and his heritage a deset for jackals."
designing:
	man 1 he doesn't have a family! he lives under a rock, writing hateful possum manifestos and designing mail bombs.
designs:
	woman it's a site where you can upload your own t-shirt designs, and people vote on them.
desires:
	{[ front page newspapers in my hometowns hero local desires victory, pockets
desktop:
	ross  i downloaded this app that shuts down my network connection, hides everything on my desktop, and disables every other program except for a bare-bones text editor.
desolation:
	- "i have hated esau; i have made his hill country a desolation, and his heritage a deset for jackals."
desperately:
	the city is in flames.  people are leaping from windows and rioting in the streets.  fire brigades try desperately to control the flames, and in the middle of it all, towering over the burning buildings and tiny people, stands the enormous, stovepipe-hatted figure of abraham lincoln.
desperation:
	desperation reeks from these walls.  this morning, you ate great handfuls of pretzels through thick veils of tears.  you will do the same tomorrow.
destitute:
	two gentlemen, armand and joe, are visiting a destitute zimbabwean village.
detachment:
	leon that's why i should be your first choice for pet surgery!  i'll display an inhuman detachment during your snookie's suffering, or you get half off your first cremation!   leon's budget veterinary - on sixth, upstairs from payday-loans-n-go!
detailed:
	harold for example, yesterday a guy asked why there's a surcharge for pickups from the airport.  hel-looo!   municipal regulations have stipulated that surcharge ever since it passed the city assembly!  it's completely detailed in the cab company's contract with the airport authority!
detect:
	richard charlotte, you don't understand!  this is the next telephone or model t - the next game-changer for humanity!  imagine, a device that can not only detect human suffering - but knows how best to alleviate it!  it could make us -
detection:
	- ...so i'm feeling around down there, and he's claiming there's a lump that he detected during a self-exam, but i can't feel a thing. and so i'm thinking, you know, with all the emphasis that we place on early detection, there must be a certain level of paranoia...
determines:
	reginald see, i have an elaborate calculus that determines whether clothes are still clean enough to wear.  don't worry, it takes a lot of variables into account.  this shirt is totally fine.
detournement:
	top hat  but the whole point of detournement, from a strict situationist perspective, is to divert bourgeois cultural elements to new subversive roles! the spectacle's great recuperative powers are hijacked to instead serve as a vehicle for revolutionary communique!
detox:
	maurice oh, ted.  and detox was going so well!
detritus:
	a large picture shows a box full of stuff, captioned "why let the detritus of previous failed projects clutter up your workspace and demoralize you? put it away for good." "build a junk box - for all your unifinished projects"
detroit:
	 i worked on the television campaign for the movie 'robots' and at one point we used the james brown song 'dr. detroit' and there is a line that goes, 'get up offa that thang, dance 'til you feel better, get up offa that thang, tryn'ta relieve that pressure' and i swear it was so infectious i had to keep standing up and dancing feverishly before i could go on
deuteronomy:
	 you can totally learn how to do this, it's in deuteronomy
developers:
	 he came to a level where you just keep dying without any way of predicting why or when or how. the developers call it 'profound'
developments:
	019019; further developments regarding the offer
devise:
	dora last semester i had a student devise an elaborate scheme where he reduced vast swaths of the textbook into a shorthand notation that he printed onto his hands with ultraviolet ink... ...then he put a tiny l.e.d. blacklight in the bridge of his glasses.  much harder than simply studying, of course.
devised:
	288288;  a game is devised
devoid:
	woman all i'm saying is that beverly has a creature living inside of her whereas i am a perfectly healthy human being totally devoid of parasites
devonshire:
	a kind of poncho is shown. gossamer waterproof garments. get the genuine! beware of worthless imitations! rival garments are made of acid-treated poison cloth. ours are safe and nurturing to your babylike skin. don't you deserve not to have your skin corroded off by the competition? masochists need not respond. we don't want your business. this is a nice place. gossamer clothing co, 28 devonshire st., boston, ma.
devoured:
	mark  he appears to have been gored by antlers, then devoured!
dew:
	second woman like a meadow in springtime, or a brisk blade of grass, glistening with dew. you are a nurturer! you are strong!
dews:
	 then i drank thirty mountain dews and ran in circles around my couch for six hours
dexter:
	dexter  sorry, all the babies i've seen come through here were very cocksure.
diabetes:
	chuck  a long life of what?  diabetes?  wasting away to nothing as modern medicine pumps morphine into an ever-hollowing shell of what once was my life?
diabetic:
	gax oh, thank you, but no.  in truth, i'm a diabetic.
diadem:
	stumbles across a(n) { magic diadem, arcane prophecy, dusty tome, crazy old man, alien artifact, enchanted sword, otherworldly portal, dream-inducing drug, encrypted data feed, time-traveling soldier, exiled angel, talking fish
diagnose:
	 self-diagnose 
diagnosis:
	gax do you take me for a fool?  upon receiving the diagnosis, do you not think that was the first thing i tried?
diagrams:
	another picture shows some sort of box, circular diagrams, illegible writing, and what looks like a gear inside a pizza.
dialects:
	jimmy you see, all human language is descended from a mother, animal tongue.  to the beasts, our yammering, overenunciated dialects sound like so much chittering gibberish!
dialed:
	 both of his hands were in full view in panel 2, and yet he dialed the phone.  how???  the answer, to this as well as so many other of life's mysteries, is pocket-tentacles.
diaper:
	- depends, like it depends, or depends, like the adult diaper?
diapers:
	- i'm taking medical advice from someone who wasn't even born until my voice was changing!  he was still in diapers when i had my transgender surgery!
dias:
	 buenos dias from 
diatribe:
	  more likely, you'll glare coldly for a second, then huff, say 'anyway,' and continue with your diatribe.  i mean, let's be clear about the stakes here.
dibs:
	scrib b ugh this room's just weird / room sez you / scrib b dibs on 
dictated:
	arvid either my identical twin brother - with whom i share a strange and unexplained psychic bond - is about to come to severe physical harm or my massive multinational organization is about to have its global strategy dictated by the signers of an internet petition!
dictator:
	which spurs him into conflict with { a megalomaniacal dictator, a government conspiracy, a profit-obsessed corporation, a sneering wizard, supernatural monsters, computer viruses made real, murderous robots, an army led by a sadist, forces that encourage conformity, a charismatic politician on the rise, humanity's selfish nature, his own insecurity vis-a-vis girls
diehard:
	 that sound you just heard was the four diehard fencers who read wondermark just gasping in delight
differ:
	- come on, stan. show some tolerance for those whose interest may differ from yours. after all, isn't that what makes the world special?
differences:
	"hopefully, for the moment if nothing more, we can set aside our differences and cooperate for the good of us all."
differential:
	inventor four independently-actuated ground-contacting sub-shoes. brushless gear assembly with hot-swappable drive bearings. double camshaft connected to a fully magnetic differential.
digestion:
	petey  who in the world is going to be observing my digestion?
dignified:
	wider shot of employer and employee. we see the employer is quite tall and dignified, and the employee is short and squat.
dih:
	- dih yuh sah tryyih tah cahstahpay?
dimensional:
	  for example, everyone "knows" that smoking is bad.  so when you try to explain that yes, smoking is largely bad--but it's also highly effective, in infants, at warding off murderous trans-dimensional bellybutton gnomes...
dimensions:
	 if nathan had know it was that easy to get cookies out of dad, he would have tried being a hellacious star-fiend from dimensions beyond human understanding years ago.
dimpled:
	dale  hanging chad?  dimpled chad? you prob'ly get that from the ladies.
dine:
	 dine in 
dined:
	- those invisible death-ships are trigger-happy, man. i want those ambassadors wined and dined and bought whatever they want. / the rich can get rich and stay rich and get even richer so long as they stay a step ahead of the expensive tastes of the monsters who hold the planet's survival in their volatile claws!
ding:
	husband "it's got a ding-dong, but we should probably hold off on those measurements for a couple years or so."
dingbats:
	  in her defense, the fine print is tiny and in zapf dingbats.
dinners:
	 taft was a well-known yukster but jimmy here would cause the most awkward of silences at all the state dinners
dino:
	quigley (a dino-turkey) your skills at car repair are woefully inadequate
dip:
	arvid i cut my own hair with an old steak knife that i dip in tractor oil are you telling me you can place a value on that
diplomatic:
	diplomatic permit excepted
directed:
	vince i don't know, it seems to me that any pun or permutation of the 'girls gone wild' concept would just be inherently in poor taste, especially at marketing directed at children.  also, it sends the tacit message that 'girls gone wild' is a normal and acceptable part of our culture - when in fact it's seedy trash that thrives on the most crass and debased elements of human nature.
directory:
	voicemail if you know your party's extension, you may dial it in reverse order using your touch-tone phone.  to access a company directory, please hold your phone receiver over a stove and watch the patterns the steam makes when viewed against a dark background.
dirt:
	- don't be. those guards are dumber than dirt.
disables:
	ross  i downloaded this app that shuts down my network connection, hides everything on my desktop, and disables every other program except for a bare-bones text editor.
disappear:
	britnee hmmh.  whatever would you do if the internet were to disappear?
disappearance:
	everyone will wonder "what's happened to her since her disappearance?  what's she been up to?"
disappeared:
	rodney denny, you disappeared--your girlfriend, your parents--we had to assume the worst--
disappears:
	the grandpa's image disappears, becoming the reflection of the woman once again, though now she is frowning
disappered:
	the man has disappered, but the camel remains.
disappointed:
	thea no!  it was because of the prospect of hot boys in jousting pants!   and i am so disappointed!
disappoints:
	467467;  melanie disappoints her grandmother
disapproving:
	- her majesty queen victoria once levelled a disapproving scowl of such ferocious intensity that none of the servant at buckingham palace were capable of shameful bodily functions for three whole days!
disapprovingly:
	woman at left, behind gax, looks on disapprovingly,eyebrows slightly raised, her eyes fixed on the aliens as she hears his reaction.  gax, just left of center, holding his walking stick in his right hand like moses' rod, does not appear any too enthused to see the aliens.  on the right, the two aliens, with bodies like plucked uncooked chickens except with armlike appendages instead of wings, ending in two grotesque long ced fingers, stare fixedly up at gax as he makes his pronouncement.  the bulging eyes of one show dismay; the other looks shocked or startled.
disarray:
	a drawing-room. furniture in disarray; father looms over potential paramour
disaster:
	dawn too late!  we've moved on to the oil spill in the gulf of mexico!  it's so tragic it makes hamlet look like 3-2-1 contact!  it's the worst marine disaster since noah's flood!  everyone is very concerned!  brow-furrowing is at an all-time high!
discard:
	a banner reads "a purposeful use of what society would discard"
discarding:
	the hollow top half of a ball "3. instead of discarding the half-balls left over from a game of slice-the-ball-in-the-garden, use them to cap off leaky sprinklers or plug gopher holes. the rubber balls are biodegradable, given a long enough timeline."
disciplined:
	183183;  a squid is disciplined
disclaim:
	 this is a very elaborate hedonist construct you've gone to simply to disclaim personal responsibility for being late.
disclosure:
	closeup of a credit-card disclosure agreement.
disconnect:
	 disconnect 
discouraged:
	"2. once your box is cut to size and sealed (as necessary), place your old project materials in the box. create dividers if desired. we recommend putting the oldest projects nearest the bottom to create a sort of strata of failure. that way you will not be too discouraged when you open the box; you will only see the birdhouse you failed to finish last week, rather than the solar-powered water-heater you discovered was way over your head three and a half years ago.*" "*for example."
discourse:
	 yeah. the discourse has been reduced to this.
discriminated:
	sig seems what?  i am discriminated against enough without your petty accusations on top of it all!
disdain:
	262262;  disdain is turned inward
diseased:
	- as punishment for showing grown-ups ugly pictures of naked diseased people, i hereby shove this rusty nail into your arm.
diseases:
	glenn  look!  if you kill a dentist, george will bless your womb with a superhuman baby immune to all known diseases!  why does nobody get this?
disenfranchise:
	the prosecutor dropped the charges under mysterious circumstances.  why you trying to disenfranchise his minority?
disenfranchised:
	- i, too, have been disenfranchised by the white man!
disequillibrium:
	 genetic inheritance! a tricky subject! the transmission disequillibrium test is one way to measure the over-transmission of an allele from heterozygous parents to affected offspring!
disguises:
	father  mr. meanscary is a murderous goblin that disguises itself as a puppy butt to lure in children.
disgust:
	todd has donned a surgical cap and mask.  he stands over a table on which a baby lies.  he scowls and a foul miasma of disgust emanates from his head.
disgusted:
	clara actually, that'd be great!  you spend all the advertising money, bringing people to this corner to buy books...and then when my kind of people get disgusted by your soulless shell of a store, they'll come and patronize me!
dishes:
	dwight ah, pumpkin!  the autumn-specific treat!  why are pumpkin dishes so seasonal?
disinterested:
	thad waves goodbye to a disinterested-looking theodosia.
disk:
	you can revise what you write even before it types in onto paper--and then you can save it onto a disk!
dismantling:
	 i have taken the liberty of dismantling your 1978 datsun 280z
dismay:
	woman at left, behind gax, looks on disapprovingly,eyebrows slightly raised, her eyes fixed on the aliens as she hears his reaction.  gax, just left of center, holding his walking stick in his right hand like moses' rod, does not appear any too enthused to see the aliens.  on the right, the two aliens, with bodies like plucked uncooked chickens except with armlike appendages instead of wings, ending in two grotesque long ced fingers, stare fixedly up at gax as he makes his pronouncement.  the bulging eyes of one show dismay; the other looks shocked or startled.
dismember:
	barry  and chainsaws, which could potentially be used to dismember everybody!
dismembered:
	 writing "...was dismembered by shrapnel from...from an incendiary..."
dismiss:
	or they dismiss your talents, figuring you've gotten ahead just on your looks.
dismissing:
	nice  well, first i acknowledge their experience, rather than minimizing or dismissing it. most people just want to be heard. i listen to them, and they calm down.
disney:
	ruth i know, but hating him seems so easy. he's a sneering beanpole on grainy videotapes with a watermelon-shaped beard! all he needs is a cackling ferret sidekick to be a mid-'90s disney villain!
disneyland:
	 the story is entitled 'a bear and his comically-large fedora go to disneyland a heavy-handed allegory about the war in afghanistan'
disobedience:
	ariel he scooched his butt across the carpet in the shape of a crop circle.  he has taken disobedience to the level of a provocateur.
dispatcher:
	the scene pans out further, revealing the blurry figure to be a professional dispatcher of dogs holding a pistol.  the pistol has been fired, evidently, for at his feet lies a very dead dog.
dispensed:
	dispensed on a roll.  you use it to hold bulging burritos closed, and repair tears and leaks in your burrito.
dispensers:
	desmond my first project will be refurb'ing the pond to feature waterproof, motion-activated bread-crumb dispensers.  these will work in concert with a mandatory neighborhood old-muffin recycling program.
dispenses:
	the strawberry dispenses a flock of butterflies.
dispersion:
	if obama wins, it'll probably be historic for reasons other than his being the fourteenth (after carter, nixon, jefferson, cleveland, both johnsons, tyler, hayes, jackson, madison, grant, wilson and arguably taylor) to feature palindromic vowel-consonant dispersion.
displeasure:
	same city backgrond; bug, alone, with outsized levitating mirror, dejectedly evaluates self with displeasure 
disposable:
	fur collar  the recontextualization of not just disposable but disposed of victorian imagery in the milieu of 21st century web-based publication and distribution is a baldly ironic statement of luddite intransigence, but with a humanizing layer of nostalgia and longing for vanished standards of craftsmanship and civility
disposables:
	you know -- saving energy, eating here for free, things like that.  trying to cut out disposables.
disposal:
	his bangs are crooked.  sideburns look like spider's nests.  poor fellow might as well have stuck his head in the garbage disposal!
disregard:
	man 1 your disregard for public opinion is shocking
disregarded:
	075075;  a family is callously disregarded
disruptive:
	skip nothing worse, right?  cramped space, uncomfortable seats, and some little rugrat just screaming bloody murder like it's a washcloth being wrung out.   well, my invention is a special hood that fits securely around the baby's upper region to effectively muffle any disruptive noises that might disturb fellow passengers.
dissed:
	051051;  man's creator is dissed
dissent:
	343343;  the holiday heralds dissent
dissolved:
	jeff yanks his arm free, but the flesh has already been dissolved from the bones.
dissolves:
	evan narrating i said "does santa give you hints in advance of what he's going to bring?  are his notes written in magic ink on north pole stationery that dissolves after a single read, leaving no evidence behind?"  and then i added "oh, the magic of it all!" and batted my eyelashes until they smiled.  they get to play the game another year.
dissolving:
	 in retrospect it was also probably a bad idea to serve, instead of ice water, flesh-dissolving acid that looked and tasted exactly like ice water
distill:
	 distill into 
distinctive:
	man in homburg i guess i just have to make my bags more distinctive somehow.
distinguished:
	an angry-looking man meets a distinguished-looking, mustachioed man. the mustachioed man gestures to his friend, a boy with a duck's head and top hat.
distract:
	con  actually i was just trying to distract you while my dog picked your pockets!
distraction:
	464464;  distraction prevails
distressed:
	a man, clearly distressed, speaks on the telephone while a radio plays beside him.
distressing:
	- of course! / i mean the alternative is just too distressing.
distribution:
	fur collar  the recontextualization of not just disposable but disposed of victorian imagery in the milieu of 21st century web-based publication and distribution is a baldly ironic statement of luddite intransigence, but with a humanizing layer of nostalgia and longing for vanished standards of craftsmanship and civility
distro:
	 punching 4 direct to dvd with foreign distro pre-sold contingent on dean cain's participation
distrustful:
	marc i'm distrustful of fluoride and fluoride derivatives!
ditch:
	jorge well you ain't starving in a ditch so i say you should be happy
ditches:
	 the crack of wheel on skull was heard for three miles around. travelers fell into ditches. farmwives clutched their hens close. it is even said that a baby born that very instant later developed a mild round protuberance on the wrists and ankles that has never been fully explained
diver:
	herve (a deep-sea diver) which way to the pool-
divers:
	 deep-sea divers
diverse:
	- meet exciting, diverse people, and kill them!
diversify:
	 diversify 
diversion:
	560560;  a diversion fails to impress
divert:
	top hat  but the whole point of detournement, from a strict situationist perspective, is to divert bourgeois cultural elements to new subversive roles! the spectacle's great recuperative powers are hijacked to instead serve as a vehicle for revolutionary communique!
divide:
	ken i - i do admit that the model cannot accommodate a divide-by-zero error
divided:
	a squareish design is shown, divided into parts, that say "carpet," "wood," "c8, ny," and "621 b'way." parquet and inlaid floors, borders for rugs, baseboards, decks, crown molding, doors, anything wood feeds our weird fetish.
dividers:
	"2. once your box is cut to size and sealed (as necessary), place your old project materials in the box. create dividers if desired. we recommend putting the oldest projects nearest the bottom to create a sort of strata of failure. that way you will not be too discouraged when you open the box; you will only see the birdhouse you failed to finish last week, rather than the solar-powered water-heater you discovered was way over your head three and a half years ago.*" "*for example."
dividing:
	the new chancellor will need to unite the barnyard...so why make that job harder by spending a solid year dividing it?
divvied:
	bobby how we tied knots, and brewed grog, and divvied up the spoils of war...
diy:
	joanne oh, i've never touched a drill in my life!  i just watch the crap out of the diy channel.
dna:
	this food made your great-great-great-great-grandparents strong enough to reproduce.  your dna is attuned to it.
dock:
	 but the craigslist thing said to just pull around back to the loading dock! that's what we did
documented:
	bart think about the weddings we've attended recently.  apparently everybody believes the event will be criminally under-documented.  everyone's watching the ceremony through their camera.  might as well be watching on tv.  at our wedding, we collect cameras at the door.  we frisk people.
doggie:
	 look, a doggie! hi there baby! look who's a cute little guy!
doggin:
	stumpy but now you're doggin' on my jokes!
doggone:
	len i want my epitaph to be "doggone if he wasn't trying his best."
dolled:
	a strange-looking lipstick "5. no need to get dolled up any longer, now that your obssessive (sic) gardening has killed romance? use that lipstick to mark crop rows in the vegetable garden. the oily stain will serve as a warning to the sprouting plants never to set their sights too high."
dolls:
	henry ah, i'm sure she's fine.  probably doing girl stuff - playing with dolls, you know, or baking muffins or some crap like that.
dolphin:
	edgar strolls along in his snazzy dolphin pants.
dolphins:
	663663; they are dolphins
domes:
	sheldon are we still doing this?  seriously?  this stereotype is still clinging to life?  first, the "nerds are all frustrated virgins" thing.  some of the nerdiest people i know are highly sexual women.  and millions of nerds have spouses twice as nerdy as they are.  and the mom's basement thing?  the nerds i know live in geodesic domes or multi-story treehouses or, at the very least, condos with garages big enough to hold their trebuchets.
domestic:
	a man and a woman are in a domestic setting.
dong:
	husband "it's got a ding-dong, but we should probably hold off on those measurements for a couple years or so."
donk:
	<<donk she headbutts him>>
donned:
	todd has donned a surgical cap and mask.  he stands over a table on which a baby lies.  he scowls and a foul miasma of disgust emanates from his head.
donut:
	man 2 or how about this one, "bad cop, no donut!"
donuts:
	drew running late.  wake up late, you're late for work.  kids late for school.  you don't have time.  busy schedule, you grab a junk-food breakfast.  pop tarts, drive-thru, donuts.  sorta montage between 'em.
doobee:
	- just breaking into song! bah dum dee doobee...
doodle:
	james's work revealed a doodle labeled "half-elephant half bat half tank call government"
doody:
	jennifer  i thought your parents tried to raise you on howdy doody and bosco drink.
doomed:
	james but if humanity lasts long enough to master time travel, then wouldn't we be overrun with time travelers?  doesn't the fact that we're not mean that humanity is doomed?
doooooing:
	 he's still doooooing it
doorstop:
	 hey, bob, that fruitcake was great!!  as a doorstop!!!
doppelg:
	098098;  a doppelg&auml;nger features
doris:
	for example, the janice s. byerton arts & letters module, the lawrence n. sanders module for music, the chester & doris codberg module for the study of modular education.
dorkasaurus:
	claudio go back to your mom's basement, dorkasaurus!
doses:
	santa santa is very concerned with your cellulose intake!  it's how he tracks you!  i've also brought some pickled marzipan!  its horridness will stimulate your bile ducts and make you smell less appetizing to the stingroaches i have also brought you.  you should start taking their venom in small doses now, while you are still larval.  be cautious!  they are not tame.
dot:
	- if you look real close, you can see the dot were i jabbed her with my pencil. go on, take a gander, she don't mind.
dotted:
	a pastoral field, dotted with trees. the weather is clear and springy.
dotty:
	 i am getting a little emotion-dotty myself just thinking of it
doubts:
	sammy some serious questions!  and some puzzling doubts!
douche:
	main panel you've been marketed to!  some douche sent an intrusion using marketing  we don't believe you've seen enough commercial messages today!  we firmly believe that web content should serve no greater purpose than to attract eyeballs that we can cram full of ads.  and since you've already proven you're dumb enough to spend a dollar on an imaginary "gift," why shouldn't we press our luck?  we know that garish, omni-present ads eventually drove you away from myspace, but we figure we can get a good six months' worth of impressions out of you before you get fed up with us, too!
dough:
	francine  maybe because mine are homemade?  no store-bought dough for me, just good ol' betty crocker mix.  and they're delicious!
doves:
	the children have practiced a song.  the doves are weeping for freedom.
downers:
	boy  there is, but the chicks are all downers.
drafty:
	- can we move yet? it's getting very drafty over here.
drag:
	johnson oh, man, dèj‡ v˚, weird.  next you're gonna drag me out in the parking lot and slap me.
dragging:
	he returns home, triumphant, dragging the beast with him.
drama:
	498498;  a rich drama unfolds
drank:
	 then i drank thirty mountain dews and ran in circles around my couch for six hours
drape:
	society is slowly folding in upon itself and smothering those of us foolish enough to have taken solace beneath its comfortable drape!
dreadful:
	woke up with a dreadful pimple.  right up top on the forehead.
dreamed:
	clive  last night i dreamed i had a real heart-to-heart with arthur from next door.
dreampt:
	 one more glimpse of that alabaster flesh stirs in me a fever i'd but dreampt of on the boldest of painkillers.
dremel:
	hermes  let me guess.  you bought an angle vise and some torx screws and a twenty-piece dremel kit.
drenched:
	 ...like i'm drenched in urine, yeah, but what about my aura?
dreyer:
	terry faithfully-recreated goals.  realistic dreams.  comes with a full set of aspirations, that, as the puppeteer, you can fulfill or crush at your discretion.  "i wanted to be an ice-cream flavor tester!"  "not even a superstar!  just a solid 9-to-5 at dreyer's that pays the bills."
drift:
	tom, his chair, and the cow drift away over an unnamed city's rooftops.
drill:
	joanne oh, i've never touched a drill in my life!  i just watch the crap out of the diy channel.
drilling:
	woman  *offshore drilling* is highly regulated, but the regulations weren't enforced.  result  massive oil spill catastrophe.
drinkers:
	 nah, i'm part of a survey group. bunch of scientists track what i eat for a couple years. then they put all the data together and say "ten percent of the coffee drinkers contracted cancer" or whatever.
drinketh:
	if ye drinketh the last of the coffee and not maketh more, thou shalt be put to death.
dripped:
	hugo except for some of the little bits that dripped out.  like those.  and some there.  but i'd say a good ninety percent is still on the stick.
dripping:
	annie just barely.  scratching a little or - i don't know.  could be your footsteps echoing.  could be water dripping.  could be my heartbeat.  he may have returned to hades.
driveway:
	cameron little help?  whose bright idea was the gravel driveway
drizzled:
	 optionally, they can be prepared drizzled with artisanal peppercorn shavings, or sprinkled with crushed crystalline minerals.  zagat take notice
droid:
	your title is "the { chrono, neuro, aero, cosmo, reve, necro, cyber, astro, psycho, steam, meta, black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, war} s."
drone:
	a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild ocd, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert
dropping:
	olaf oh, nothing!  just passing through!  looks like you guys made some, um, improvements since i was here scouting the area for conquest- i mean - um - dropping off that muffin basket.
drumstick:
	center dunk me a drumstick! are you crowing for dawn, or is this the straight bacon?
dryers:
	daughter and he does all of his laundry at my apartment complex!  i guess we have some special brand of dryers?
dryin:
	woman we're rockin' it we're rollin' it we're dryin' it denyin' it ...the right to be wet anymore
drywall:
	jasper it tastes like drywall.
dubious:
	272272;  shirley makes dubious claims to insanity
duchamp:
	ariel well, as did duchamp!
ducked:
	jane your shoulder was almost even with the ridge by the top of the mirror.  so that would have made you this tall, the last time i saw you.  or did i see you at jim's wedding?  i ducked out early - court appointment - but i may have seen you.  you would have been seated and i would have only seen the back of your head, if anything.  so it would have been hard to estimate your height from that.
ducks:
	bob norm!  you seen this new, hundred-foot-tall "welcome ducks" banner in front of my house?  you know anything about that?
ducts:
	santa santa is very concerned with your cellulose intake!  it's how he tracks you!  i've also brought some pickled marzipan!  its horridness will stimulate your bile ducts and make you smell less appetizing to the stingroaches i have also brought you.  you should start taking their venom in small doses now, while you are still larval.  be cautious!  they are not tame.
dudes:
	stan hideous antelope-creatures, or dudes in dresses?
duel:
	roderick by frontier law, you must stop if i challenge your mount to a blood-feud honor-duel!
duh:
	 duh
dukakis:
	dawn too late!  old news!  health care is the biggest problem facing our society since dukakis rode a tank!  grave pronouncements are hitting the media at rates unseen since the cuban missile crisis!
duly:
	  ma'am, as a duly sworn butt inspector i cannot let any slight within my purview go unrectified.
dum:
	- just breaking into song! bah dum dee doobee...
dummies:
	- like i told you six months ago. i make the finest carpool lane dummies in the state.
dunderschnauzen:
	waiter  let's see...rusty tricycle, uncleburglar, steelhouse stiltwalker, boogerbrau, prancing minotaur, dunderschnauzen, chairfarter stout, and aardshark.
dung:
	their cubicles shall become dung-hills and their parking garage a wasteland  i am the lord.
dungeon:
	man 1 because he was out kidnapping squirrels to torture in twisted experiments. his fetid dungeon is filled with the stench of despair. but no more! the forest need tremble in fear no longer!
dunk:
	center dunk me a drumstick! are you crowing for dawn, or is this the straight bacon?
dunlap:
	marvin please, miz dunlap, you are yelling at the world's most broken man
duplicates:
	wife duplicates?
durant:
	- since you asked, i've been cast in the jackson high school production of "swan lake 2 the return of durant!" they said i was perfect for "hildy."
durgahd:
	woman 2 don't interrupt me, child!  we are mid-incantation.  wonnayshun un durgahd
durp:
	mayor durp
duties:
	carlos on mexico, creatures are segregated by horn quality into inviolable casts that annually rotate civic duties,  right now twosies are the lawyers, threesies the bakers, and ninesies like us are the astronauts.
dweeb:
	octavio like playing video games?  for every hour you play, some korean kid plays five.  name any sport you like.  some dweeb-o's been at it all day every day since he could walk.  and forget about creative media.  in this day and age, not even the most avid hobbyist can compete with "pirated software and zero social life."
dweeborg:
	mykelle, aka mizike  but everybody's getting their skull drilled out and filled with expansion foam!  it means you're not a dweeborg!
dynamite:
	man2 i gritted my teeth through napoleon dynamite. 
dystopian:
	in a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, vr-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | america, japan, soviet russia, victorian britain, medieval europe, aztec empire, atlantis, terraformed mars, antarctica, one-way spaceflight, outer rim world, set from road warrior,
ea:
	yellow eyes ~1.0cm ea
eae_ea:
	closeup of a crossword puzzle.  21 down and 39 across are incomplete, showing _ere__ and eae_ea, respectively.
eaexea:
	same as first panel, except the empty boxes are filled in with a q, and x and a z.  21 down is now qerexz and 39 across is now eaexea.
eanna:
	 go close to the eanna temple, the residence of ishtar, such as no later king or man equaled!  go up the wall of uruk and walk around, examine its foundation, inspect its brickwork thoroughly.  go 0.8 miles on broadview terrace, then bear slight right turn and turn onto california avenue, for your destination will be on the right.
earliest:
	eugene the dollars in jefferson's and ford's times were on the gold standard!  they corresponded to specific lumps of metal in fort knox!  your arrogant attempt to place yourself at the crossroads of history must begin in 1933 at the earliest!
earlobe:
	 i also have a bewitched nose and a hexed earlobe.  at my age you just sort of acquire these things.
earmarked:
	garth oh, baby!  are you sure that's safe?  there was that whole scandal where the commissioner of the high-speed snooze association was forced to resign after misappropriating $3.8 million congressionally earmarked for snuggle development!
earned:
	that's right!  turn around and see what justice your evil has earned you!
earnest:
	617617; a day of earnest efforts
earphones:
	he holds out what appears to be a large bell.  earphones run from the bell to the shorter man's ears.
earrings:
	a man in a turban sits, with some scales.   a woman in a sari and ornate earrings sits as well.
earthlings:
	gaxian hey, you want to know the number one cause of death for impudent earthlings? me
earthmen:
	109109;  earthmen are revealed to be hard-core
earthworms:
	 do you even care about my interests? (regurgitating earthworms; eating beetles; screaming at the top of my lungs for no reason whatsoever)
earwigs:
	 his third guess would have been earwigs. that is just the kind of guy he is!
easel:
	the woman stands in front of a display easel riddled with shuriken
eastbound:
	six papa romeo desert tower, biplane six papa romeo requests eastbound transition your airspace at five thousand five hundred.
eastern:
	walt breaking news.  tragedy strikes eastern europe as a trainload of irradiated hamsters derails in the former soviet republic of georgia.
easygoing:
	dennis what if i'm okay with not being the world's greatest at something?  what if i'm content with being an easygoing, well-rounded individual whose pursuits are more about personal enjoyment than internet competitiveness?
eater:
	mikey nobody trusts the eater to be able to handle a cupcake with a darker, more unpleasant flavor!  everyone wants chocolate and vanilla and sugar, sugar, sugar.  life is not just sugar!  real life has vinegar and mustard and salt!
eats:
	056056;  a book eats a man
ebb:
	glen flying kites through outdoor malls. sitting on rooftops watching traffic ebb and flow. collecting loose nuts and bolts from junkyards, then spending lonely evenings trying to match them all up.
ebenezer:
	morty  absolutely.  but come christmas morning, what do we see but ebenezer scrooge himself dancing down the avenue, handing out candy and neck-rubs!  we can't even get the "lo" out of "hello" before he's torn up our debt right there in the street!
echoes:
	all hearing echoes of the guy three stalls down when he blinks.
echoing:
	annie just barely.  scratching a little or - i don't know.  could be your footsteps echoing.  could be water dripping.  could be my heartbeat.  he may have returned to hades.
eco:
	seamus  i highly doubt you are reading umberto eco.
edgy:
	jack it's 'edgy'.
edition:
	 simon would rather the guinness book be utterly exhaustive.  he would gladly read a 58,000-page edition.
editions:
	candidate bloggers will wear their fingers to the bone. magazines and newspapers will run extra editions. talk radio will get so apoplectic that cars will be driven off the road by the score.
editor:
	ross  i downloaded this app that shuts down my network connection, hides everything on my desktop, and disables every other program except for a bare-bones text editor.
eep:
	woman  eep!
eerie:
	- you really captured that stern, proud expression. his eyes, especially. it's eerie.
ees:
	 'she ees my seester' ha ha ha ha ha wait why aren't you laughing
effectively:
	skip nothing worse, right?  cramped space, uncomfortable seats, and some little rugrat just screaming bloody murder like it's a washcloth being wrung out.   well, my invention is a special hood that fits securely around the baby's upper region to effectively muffle any disruptive noises that might disturb fellow passengers.
effects:
	count davis-grabble how long ago did the previous owner move out?  seems like there's still a lot of personal effects.
effete:
	second  that was separate! she called my leggings "effete"
efficiency:
	bearded  and i have even made some improvements! simple things - track efficiency, crowd flow ...
egypt:
	sick  i was torn into by an illness left over from the plagues of egypt.
ehrm:
	baxter  it's, ehrm
eighties:
	gustave remember the eighties?  you'd be in line behind a heavy-metal dude with long hair and think it was a chick?
eights:
	- you there! have you seen my son go by? he's infected by a terrible virus that will kill one-third of the earth's population, making five-eights of those remaining lactose intolerant while granting amazing super-powers to a quarter of the remainder!
einstein:
	otto redeeming it.  [to dave]  ah, yes.  looks like these dollars in your account were once used for a hooker binge on a ceo's yacht.  right now i have einstein's patent office wages for a 15% commission - or jfk's pulitzer prize winnings for twenty.
el:
	carlos our planet's name is mexico.  it means "fragrant flowering fruit" in our native tongue.  prior cultures have called it by other names.  guatemala.  honduras.  el salvador.  nicaragua.
elect:
	father in other words, we should elect the most crazy nutball wackjob out there.
electro:
	the electro-plasmic hydrocephalic genre-fiction generator 2000
electron:
	george washington and? did you know there are over six octillion processes happening in your body every second? if i had an electron microscope i could tell 'em thanks! thanks for all the hard work! but i don't. cuz of martha.
elevate:
	mabel  oh, please.  don't elevate a garden-variety social disorder into a medical--
elevenths:
	angus just out of curiosity, is there a reason why fares are calculated based on elevenths of a mile?
eliminate:
	many municipal power plants already use coal to generate electricity. some enterprising folks have had the clever idea to eliminate the middleman and consume coal directly, using it to power home appliances, vehicles, pets, plants - anything in need of energy. can this be done feasibly and safely? we have investigated, and the answer appears to be no. absolutely not. the notion is ridiculous.
eliminated:
	employer i think you eliminated that option when you keyed my car on your way in.
eliminates:
	 but curiously he still eliminates right on schedule
ellis:
	mr. meanscary  for your information, my grandfather chose this name on ellis island!
elongated:
	if the sparse hair on each digit stiffened and elongated into whiskers, and those rigid tendons on my feet became long, whipping tails, possessed of an independent dark energy?
elope:
	 elope 
elopement:
	665665; seconds before the elopement
eloquence:
	bufo (thought) ...how can i be the only one enthralled by my own eloquence??
eludes:
	411411;  dinner eludes two
elvengrad:
	kris oh, yes. that's what they used to call me. before the proletariat revolution. before elvengrad. before the camps.
emanates:
	todd has donned a surgical cap and mask.  he stands over a table on which a baby lies.  he scowls and a foul miasma of disgust emanates from his head.
embalming:
	 i did the embalming myself with this handy home kit
embarassment:
	- as you can see, our portable device saves the patient the embarassment and awkwardness of the traditional stirrups and speculum. - i'll begin the exam by inserting a small amount of lubricating paste to help her open and allow light in. - gee! - nurse, please bring in a dose of gyno-paste. (my own formula.) - you may experience some slight discomfort. - hope you're not allergic to peanut butter.  get a clue at   modesty, chastity, virtue
embarking:
	 huh! i guess i never got around to checking the train schedule before embarking on this ridiculous excursion!
embarrassment:
	son of tree aaahh, dad. <<cringe of embarrassment>> we are not going to have this conversation right now!!
embers:
	 through the quiet crackle of cooling embers she thought she almost heard him weeping. but it was probably just a faint hiss of steam, or else the wind, or else the sorrowful ghosts of her long year full of many purposeful misdeeds
emblazoned:
	387387;  baggage is emblazoned
emblems:
	 note for international readers hot topic is a store found in suburban shopping malls.  they sell a bizarre combination of naughty novelties, goth gear like corsets and boots, and trendy logo shirts with 'clever' sayings and nintendo characters and the emblems of punk rock bands that were big a decade before the average customer was born.  it is the dictionary definition of over-the-counter counterculture.
embrace:
	may we find solace in each others' tight embrace!
emil:
	emil are you still driving a cab?
emits:
	two men stand over a deep pit, which emits white smoke
emote:
	 emote 
emotional:
	second  emotional distress, innit.
emphasis:
	- ...so i'm feeling around down there, and he's claiming there's a lump that he detected during a self-exam, but i can't feel a thing. and so i'm thinking, you know, with all the emphasis that we place on early detection, there must be a certain level of paranoia...
emphasize:
	it's an odd thing to emphasize.  are we expected to just head over and start browsing?
employees:
	man 2 hey, i work for pepsico!    it's actually a really good company.   they provide great benefits for employees.
employs:
	088088;  ty employs questionable methods
emporium:
	 stymied at the novelty-scissor emporium!
emptied:
	otto sometimes i wonder about my money.  do i still have the first dollar i ever made?  is it still at the bottom of my checking account?  i've never emptied it completely.
enabled:
	voicemail to report a lost or stolen card, twist the receiver in opposite directions with both hands.  have a resealable glass container nearby to catch the liquid that emerges from the earpiece.  in a dark, quiet room, press your face against the mouth of the container and tell the liquid exactly what happened to your card.  vivid memories are best.  the good times your card enabled you to have.  tell it all this, and seal it.
enabling:
	  in an emergency, s.a.m.i.r. can overclock his central cam-drive, thus enabling him to give 110%.
enchanterings:
	woman 2 he must got the superlice that need the double-strength enchanterings.
enclose:
	the latest goods that you cannot exist without  "take it apart" tinkerbox parts - tools shiny sundries designed to rapidly expend your working capital.  best prices of the season/enclose cash with order
encoded:
	 all the media down here is encoded as region 666, is that okay
encompassing:
	- i've put it in my room where its all-encompassing lack of being can hopefully inspire me to clean once in a while!
encouraged:
	114114;  haste is encouraged
encouragement:
	but instead, a chorus of encouragement from other lunatics strokes his quirk into an obsession that takes over his identity!
encrypted:
	stumbles across a(n) { magic diadem, arcane prophecy, dusty tome, crazy old man, alien artifact, enchanted sword, otherworldly portal, dream-inducing drug, encrypted data feed, time-traveling soldier, exiled angel, talking fish
encyclopaedia:
	 'the most comprehensive encyclopaedia ever will surely need six different close-ups from various angles'
endangered:
	miss butterbean  a piranhamoose?  wherever did you run into a piranhamoose?  they're endangered, you know.
endeth:
	703703; thus endeth the business
endofarb:
	 i'm here for a meeting with dr. rasmus endofarb, drinking straw innovator?
endtable:
	a young woman is standing and holding a violin.  another young woman is sitting at an endtable which holds a candlestick telephone.
enforce:
	  we need an elite squad of meta-enforcers to enforce enforcement.  they will be dressed all in leather and answer only to their own enforcers.
engagement:
	 mr. meanscary would like to give back to his community and foster civic engagement, if you people would just let him
engaging:
	john who decided they should announce the score by saying which team's winning?  that seems one-sided.  people love underdogs, right?  framing the score in terms of which team has an obstacle to overcome would be more engaging!
engineer:
	 in los angeles, where i live, there seem to have been a lot of people whose dire need for employment somehow trumped the city engineer's need for people who actually knew how to design highway interchanges
engines:
	mexican alien #2 since much of our matter-energy was expended on the journey to earth, and our cruiser's engines run only on mexican matter...we are stuck here until we can grow some more mass!
engravings:
	professor i first made the acquaintance of young master malki ! when he came under my tutelage at oxford -- introduction to mad biochemistry, as i recall. frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. "malki !, my lad," i told him on more than one occasion, "if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then i fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world." but some boys just refuse to listen.
enigma:
	phoebe  oh, i'll grant an interview once a decade or so.  but each appearance will only deepen the enigma.
enjoyable:
	researcher which of these adjectives would you use to describe the queen? likeable, cool, enjoyable, funny, exciting, impressive, relatable?
enjoyed:
	062062;  tobacco is enjoyed
enjoys:
	176176;  satan enjoys matzoh
enlighten:
	  enlighten yourself 
enmaddened:
	257257;  libs are enmaddened
enquire:
	  walforth barber academy!  we buy hairy corpses; enquire within.
enrolled:
	man1 well, i'm not what you might call "officially enrolled." but i am indeed going to classes!
enslaved:
	yuri enslaved by a cruel monarch!  worked to death by thirty!  but i bet their sinuses were clear as hell!
ensues:
	133133;  awkwardness ensues
entangled:
	down on the shore, passers-by gawk and point at the sight of pat and his glider helplessly entangled in the power and phone lines.
enterprise:
	419419;  an enterprise fails spectacularly
enterprising:
	many municipal power plants already use coal to generate electricity. some enterprising folks have had the clever idea to eliminate the middleman and consume coal directly, using it to power home appliances, vehicles, pets, plants - anything in need of energy. can this be done feasibly and safely? we have investigated, and the answer appears to be no. absolutely not. the notion is ridiculous.
enthralled:
	bufo (thought) ...how can i be the only one enthralled by my own eloquence??
enthused:
	woman at left, behind gax, looks on disapprovingly,eyebrows slightly raised, her eyes fixed on the aliens as she hears his reaction.  gax, just left of center, holding his walking stick in his right hand like moses' rod, does not appear any too enthused to see the aliens.  on the right, the two aliens, with bodies like plucked uncooked chickens except with armlike appendages instead of wings, ending in two grotesque long ced fingers, stare fixedly up at gax as he makes his pronouncement.  the bulging eyes of one show dismay; the other looks shocked or startled.
enthusiasm:
	ernestina but that's the problem! the enthusiasm is only good for about a day. so you can wait it out until it joins the interminable list of "good ideas you'll never do" - or you can just spend that energy. dive in. just try something. / better to do something with passion that turns out misguided, than carefully decide to do nothing at all. 
enthusiast:
	i have a medical background.  i'm a plastics enthusiast.  i even have a friend trying to break his lease on
entities:
	rider actually, at this point the only entities with remotely enough power to fight the corporations are the corporations.
entitlement:
	i don't want him becoming some texting-crazed exhibitionist facebook-urchin with a narcissistic sense of entitlement!
entity:
	sammy but - that makes even less logical sense than him being a separate entity!
entrails:
	sign  house special / customer's entrails are torn from their body and fed to them in a broth of vomit.
entreaty:
	376376;  mindy rebuffs an entreaty
envy:
	but man are we the envy of the community garden!
epa:
	miss butterbean  if that's true, that's a very serious federal crime.  are you prepared for me to report your dad to the epa?
ephod:
	 don your linen ephod at 
epidemic:
	man in turban *an epidemic has killed the entire human race leaving only you and me alive*
episode:
	100th episode! wowie!
epitaph:
	len i want my epitaph to be "doggone if he wasn't trying his best."
epithets:
	dennis bouncing a wiffle ball on the shell of an irate turtle while chanting archaic epithets in every indo-european language?
equal:
	- with purchase of equal or greater value.
equaled:
	 go close to the eanna temple, the residence of ishtar, such as no later king or man equaled!  go up the wall of uruk and walk around, examine its foundation, inspect its brickwork thoroughly.  go 0.8 miles on broadview terrace, then bear slight right turn and turn onto california avenue, for your destination will be on the right.
equals:
	 you've been socially conditioned by mouthwash commercials to believe that mint equals clean.  but really, you're just trading one food smell for another!
equations:
	a girl is sitting on a bench, opposite a boy. behind the boy is a machine of some sort, and a wall on which are written numerous equations and formulas. a second girl is sitting nearer the machine.
equestrian:
	will you hire only the best equestrian-pilates trainers?  and will you do the exercises with her so she doesn't get self-conscious?  despite the fact that they are designed for a horse's body, not a man's?
equinox:
	bob and the actual date of christmas is arbitrary anyhow.  so we just bumped our celebration from the december solstice up to the march equinox.
equip:
	like all the random stuff i've done over the years has just been to equip me perfectly for this.
equipment:
	billy oh!  and kendra's friend is a dj with his own equipment!
equitable:
	717717; the equitable redistribution of rigatoni
equity:
	 build equity 
equivalent:
	 well, it's june, honey, and right now i'm only the equivalent of forty.
equus:
	 icarus + equus = icareq
erase:
	 erase the past at 
erected:
	 the banner was erected in the night.
erects:
	 kenmore erects giant fridge to memorialize him, self-promote
erg:
	maude  uhh...erg...no
erik:
	- maybe i'm thinking of "chips"? no, that was that erik estrada show. now i'm really confused.
erroneous:
	 david malki ! is not an easy man to know. he's like ... like a row which has been filled completely save for a 3 and a 7, but there is not enough information in the surrounding grid to determine which digit should go  box, a delicate state  a single misstep could lead to further erroneous assumptions, compounding upon itself until the entire puzzle is rendered unsalvageable. sometimes i suspect he doesn't even *like* sudoku.
erudite:
	 the communist pirates are for the liberal arts subjects and there are erudite dinosaurs for computer science
erwin:
	erwin this appears to be a schematic for a plastic grocery bag.
esau:
	- "i have hated esau; i have made his hill country a desolation, and his heritage a deset for jackals."
escaped:
	 just then the kinght came charging up, but he could only move in l-shapes so that dastardly bishop escaped
escort:
	our children will grow up native to the changed civilization to come.  they will escort us gracefully to the final death of all that we understand.
essence:
	 brian has distilled wondermark to its very essence.
essense:
	- raoul, this truly is the essense of my father. you have cast his soul in bronze. i feel like any second he's going to pass out drunk in my wedding cake.
essentials:
	eleanor  i've pared the collection down to the essentials.
est:
	 c'est la vie 
establish:
	carlos greetings!  we are visitors from the planet mexico, many light-years away.  we have come in peace to establish friendly, mutually-beneficent relations.
established:
	woman we have established a wintergreen napkin palette.  these turquoise pepper mills you found suggest a fundamentally southwestern character.
estates:
	do you own tea estates in kenya and tanzania?  do you invest millions every year in tea research?  do you attract tea experts from around the world to work for you?
esteem:
	<<scribble scribble bad self esteem sound effect>> 
estimate:
	jane your shoulder was almost even with the ridge by the top of the mirror.  so that would have made you this tall, the last time i saw you.  or did i see you at jim's wedding?  i ducked out early - court appointment - but i may have seen you.  you would have been seated and i would have only seen the back of your head, if anything.  so it would have been hard to estimate your height from that.
estrada:
	- maybe i'm thinking of "chips"? no, that was that erik estrada show. now i'm really confused.
eternally:
	- i give you the depths of my soul. i pledge myself to you eternally.
ethereal:
	delia well, of course.  she?s ethereal.  pots and pans are too heavy for her spectral fingers.  envelopes are much more her speed.
ethic:
	gax the mexicans! of course! known throughout the universe for their bravery, loyalty, and work ethic!
ethnicity:
	 don't worry it wasn't a ____* baby (*your race, religion, ethnicity or other subgroup)
euphemism:
	 'baking muffins' is a euphemism
euphemisms:
	right ooh! the sudden electricity in the air suggests to me that your strange vegetable-based euphemisms have taken a turn for the vulgar!
euphoria:
	 furthermore, i am appalled that anyone would require chemical aids to achieve euphoria
euuucieee:
	woman 2 ohhhohh saihkahnn euuucieee
evaluates:
	same city backgrond; bug, alone, with outsized levitating mirror, dejectedly evaluates self with displeasure 
evenings:
	glen flying kites through outdoor malls. sitting on rooftops watching traffic ebb and flow. collecting loose nuts and bolts from junkyards, then spending lonely evenings trying to match them all up.
evens:
	born on evens (4/28; 6/2; 10/12; etc); no effect
everlasting:
	 she wants to keep her last name after we get married; i want freedom from this everlasting torment. all good relationships are built on compromise.
evicted:
	- perhaps. that reminds me. i've evicted your family and bulldozed your house to build a car wash that'll fit my humvee.
evolution:
	anton all ants are actually humans from the future.  resource scarcity will not be kind to our evolution.
evolutionarily:
	character 2 here's how i see it. we're evolutionarily adapted to be repulsed by things that could make us ill.
ewwwww:
	 ever step onto the subway on a hot day and get just smacked in the face with a wave of b.o.?  ewwwww.
ex:
	mr. meanscary  i never did!  it's a vicious lie being spread by my bitter ex-wife!
examination:
	dr. monroe just out of curiosity, i put a few key phrases into google.  "an examination of the utilitarian philosophy" by john grote was published in 1870.  it is word-for-word identical to your essay.
examined:
	- but you're a pharmacist, not a doctor. you haven't examined me, not diagnosed me. you can't presume to make health decisions for me.
examples:
	greg let's say there's an expansion bay on my phone.  i can buy third-party modules specific to my needs.  maybe i want a digital tape measure and a level.  maybe i want a micrometer or a magnifier.  sometimes these are things i have to carry with me.  why can't they be on my phone, linked to the processor and the camera and the bluetooth chip?  i could turn my phone into a scanner or a nutritional scale or camera binoculars or fishing radar.  my examples aren't that broad-reaching, but if it's open-source then any tool a sufficiently nerdy subculture can't live without, they'll develop for themselves.  whaddya think?  good idea, huh?
exams:
	doctor and frankly, i'm not sure why you keep scheduling these exams.
exasperation:
	"for goodness' sake" is an expression of exasperation.
exceed:
	 exceed expectations at 
exceedingly:
	not simmons  this is a red-letter day, simmons!  the goofy elk is exceedingly rare!
exceeds:
	joe the country's industries have shut down.  the daily death rate exceeds darfur's.  just goes to show it takes total commitment.
excel:
	jimbo listen, '5.  you think you could do me a solid on this?  we'd put you right up front on a major invoice.  yeah.  unit price.  you'd be a multiplier.  big job.  that's why i called you.  thanks, '5.  you're a pro.  i'll dial you in.  see you in excel.
excels:
	430430;  jordan excels at sport (in color!)
exchanging:
	eugene so you're...exchanging it for them?
excitable:
	talia  oh, sweetie, you do.  it's being excitable about retarded things like this.
excitement:
	590590;  excitement is tempered
exclaim:
	 exclaim 
excrete:
	 excrete fluid 
excretum:
	husband "its first bowel movement yielded 400 grams of excretum, having the viscosity of warm butter."
excruciating:
	instead of dollars, it's paid in excruciating groin-kicks, administered by hugo here.
excursion:
	 huh! i guess i never got around to checking the train schedule before embarking on this ridiculous excursion!
excuses:
	355355;  excuses are formulated
execute:
	old  execute command sequence j-w-6
executed:
	cut to a scene of a man being executed by a firing squad.
executing:
	ed now, to answer your question yes, we will be executing him.  bethany has the silver dagger.  bethany?
exertion:
	 the color guard is nervously tittering.  the brass band has fainted from exertion.  the mayor is beginning to check his pocketwatch and fidget with his sash.
exhausted:
	colonel in lieu of gifts i shall throw stones.  when stones are exhausted i shall throw ice.  we will continue until all present are unconscious.
exhausting:
	gwench hanging out with you is always so exhausting!  geez.
exhaustive:
	 simon would rather the guinness book be utterly exhaustive.  he would gladly read a 58,000-page edition.
exhibitionist:
	i don't want him becoming some texting-crazed exhibitionist facebook-urchin with a narcissistic sense of entitlement!
exhibits:
	 'it exhibits a striking lack of comprehension of even the most rudimentary precepts of fire safety'
exhilarate:
	441441;  politics exhilarate
existance:
	- as utter non-existance goes, i'm glad you went for the medium size. it fits just right in my breakfast nook. say hi to uncle crandall. julie
existed:
	barbara a load o' rubbish mos' likely.  all fulla monsters what never existed an' other lies similar.
existential:
	patient i swear, nobody else has ever felt like i do. i'm a middle-class white guy stuck in an existential crisis, doc. you don't know how torturous it is to be me!
expend:
	the latest goods that you cannot exist without  "take it apart" tinkerbox parts - tools shiny sundries designed to rapidly expend your working capital.  best prices of the season/enclose cash with order
expensively:
	a banner at the top says "converting everything to coal power [how to do it terribly - expensively - and with great difficulty]"
experienced:
	everyone has experienced trouble related to insufficient potato consumption. but how to make time for the labor involved in regular kitchen preparation? with the potato injector, the time for fretting is past. using surgical-grade tubing, the injector pipes pulped potato nectar into your body intravenously.
experiments:
	man 1 because he was out kidnapping squirrels to torture in twisted experiments. his fetid dungeon is filled with the stench of despair. but no more! the forest need tremble in fear no longer!
expertise:
	glen i was hoping to perhaps parlay my expertise in ennui into some sort of lucrative public speaking profession.
expire:
	 enthusiastic ideas are like crappy rewards points. you earn them fair and square, but then they expire faster than you think.
expired:
	traces of...expired margarine.  wet animal.  misery.
expires:
	you can use it a few times--until you're stuck with a card that's got $1.18 left on it.  then, the card expires!
explanation:
	- so, the only logical explanation is that the publisher is spying on me! watching my every move, sharting my every emotion... my privacy is gone! my civil liberties violated! i hope my hair looks okay.
exploded:
	- you exploded my baby!
explodes:
	107107;  a head explodes
exploitation:
	josh look, whatever he was trying to do, he ended up subjugating the native peoples and opening the door for european exploitation of the americas!
explorer:
	malki ! oh. hello there! i'm david malki !, explorer, industrialist, and ceo of wondermark industries ...
exploring:
	 go exploring 
explosions:
	 the bechdel test does she talk to another woman about something other than a man? yes she talks to the robot queen about explosions
expressed:
	097097;  a hope is expressed
expressly:
	king the bylaws of our experimental agrarian city-state expressly prohibit mischievous tampering with the natural order of living things!
ext:
	ext  house
extended:
	in the foreground, we see a man's hand. he has his thumb and forefinger extended so that two men standing in the distance appear to fit between them.
extension:
	voicemail if you know your party's extension, you may dial it in reverse order using your touch-tone phone.  to access a company directory, please hold your phone receiver over a stove and watch the patterns the steam makes when viewed against a dark background.
exterminate:
	dwight  i think our daughter might be a cyborg sent from the future to exterminate humanity.
external:
	hugo but whenever some external force, such as the state, commands us under penalty to to do or not do certain things - isn't that negating our personal choice to do or not do that thing?  in other words, removing our free will.  and isn't free will and moral agency the defining characteristic of humanity?  thus, i must reject any "law" that prescribes my actions as incompatible with my very nature as a reasoning being!
extolled:
	137137;  the virtues of alcohol are extolled
extract:
	the mangler. should your handicrafts call for fresh bone marrow, this bench-mounted device will extract it speedily.  why pay more for store-bought?  fresh is unmatched for flavor.  $3.50
extraordinary:
	carlos it requires extraordinary power to propel an object of great mass across the galaxy!  so we convert much of the matter to energy and store it in compact batteries.
extreme:
	katie so if we feed the system visionaries, and it spits them out as mediocrities...then what we need is some sort of extreme double mega-visionary who'll get worn down to the level of 'visionary.'
eyebrows:
	woman at left, behind gax, looks on disapprovingly,eyebrows slightly raised, her eyes fixed on the aliens as she hears his reaction.  gax, just left of center, holding his walking stick in his right hand like moses' rod, does not appear any too enthused to see the aliens.  on the right, the two aliens, with bodies like plucked uncooked chickens except with armlike appendages instead of wings, ending in two grotesque long ced fingers, stare fixedly up at gax as he makes his pronouncement.  the bulging eyes of one show dismay; the other looks shocked or startled.
eyed:
	bob, with glasses and mustache, looks bug-eyed at reader.
eyelashes:
	evan narrating i said "does santa give you hints in advance of what he's going to bring?  are his notes written in magic ink on north pole stationery that dissolves after a single read, leaving no evidence behind?"  and then i added "oh, the magic of it all!" and batted my eyelashes until they smiled.  they get to play the game another year.
eyeshadow:
	 to me my eyeshadow! i would make a vlog entry.
fabled:
	stan an antelope-headed man bearing a large sack on his back, and wearing a dress kind villager!  is this the fabled town of inclusia?  where all are welcomed and respected, no matter what?
fabulously:
	glen i'm back!   and i've become fabulously wealthy!
facade:
	sidney  aaahh your constant, belittling gaze turns my venoms backward!  so much self-conscious that it cracks my stoic facade!
facile:
	alf a facile comparison!  baseball is a competition, and we expect the pitcher to also be partially successful.  you have no such excuse.  your horn is a thing of brass.  it is not fighting you.  despite what you insist, it is not some animate demon spirit hell-bent on sabotaging your every effort.
facility:
	and her { wacky pet, welding gear, closet full of assault rifles, reference book, cleavage, facility with magic, condescending tone, discomfort in formal wear, propensity for being captured,
factions:
	student we sing songs about how mexicans are lazy, kids go to mexicans-are-lazy camp, there's all this ritual chanting...  but now is a tough time.  recently the church splity into factions - my group thinks zacatecanos are the laziest, but some crazy nutjobs think it's oaxacans. what a bunch of idiots!
factual:
	 i like the daily show a lot, but nobody seems to listen to jon when he insists (truthfully) that it's a comedy show, not a factual news show.
faded:
	picture of potato injector - it's got a crank, a needle, some faded potatoes in the background, and a picture of it being injected into some guys arm
fads:
	son picking up on fads like a year too late.
faeces:
	113113;  leo purchases faeces
failing:
	john  you're trying to paint this as some sort of character failing, but i have the lp!
fainted:
	 the color guard is nervously tittering.  the brass band has fainted from exertion.  the mayor is beginning to check his pocketwatch and fidget with his sash.
fainting:
	a photographer is taking pictures of a dog perched on a fainting couch.
faintly:
	woman at left; gax, dressed in a suit, at right, with 19th-century industrial-age residential buildings faintly visible in the in background.
fairs:
	garth all right.  gimme like two hours to finish reading this article about county fairs.
fairy:
	rhonda then your mind's gonna explode when you figure out i am the tooth fairy and the easter bunny and the birthday frog too
faithfully:
	terry faithfully-recreated goals.  realistic dreams.  comes with a full set of aspirations, that, as the puppeteer, you can fulfill or crush at your discretion.  "i wanted to be an ice-cream flavor tester!"  "not even a superstar!  just a solid 9-to-5 at dreyer's that pays the bills."
faked:
	126126;  cancer is faked
fakey:
	 n - no reason, it's just - uh, it's just grape, and you do not look like a guy that appreciates that fakey grape flavor.  i mean it would probably put you off your whole night.  and this is your night.
faking:
	- you... you mean that you've been faking cancer for twenty years? just to teach me a lesson?
fakirs:
	 not pictured wwi-era german officers in pointy helmets, fakirs, stripes-wearing prisoners complete with shackles and iron balls, larry flynt
falcon:
	a man is startled by a tiny man in a bright yellow suit and top hat riding a falcon.
fallacy:
	609609;  natalie finds the fallacy
fallback:
	marvin my fallback is coke mule.
falsehood:
	evan oh, i know the whole santa charade is a determined yet pointless falsehood, like johnny appleseed or larry the cable guy.  but the looks on their faces when they thought they'd ruined it for me!  the poor babies were crushed!  i had to save their feelings!
falsehoods:
	barbara fiction is the creation of falsehoods for the delusion of children.  this james is half a man, he's written' some useful tract on a better way to plow a field or such
families:
	plus, for many of them, it's their first christmas away from their families.  it's rough on morale, sir.
fanbelt:
	lord fanbelt so last week.
fanning:
	a woman sits on a couch, fanning herself as she talks to a young girl, lisa.
fantasy:
	- i will inhabit any fantasy world that will put shredder on my body.
farce:
	before the internet, he's alone and miserable...but now he's on a message-board full of friendly, like-minded freaks reassuring each other that they don't need to conform to some marketing-driven farce of "normality" to be happy!
fares:
	angus just out of curiosity, is there a reason why fares are calculated based on elevenths of a mile?
farmed:
	older  and you feel a sadness, in a way, because the chicken you eat today is factory-farmed, and your teeth are artificially strenghtened by fluoridated water, and you wonder if you would even survive back then...
farmland:
	bruce she was a traveler.  taken in by a hog rancher back when this used to be farmland?
farms:
	ken i would start by checking johann's expense accounts for hickory farms receipts.
farmwives:
	 the crack of wheel on skull was heard for three miles around. travelers fell into ditches. farmwives clutched their hens close. it is even said that a baby born that very instant later developed a mild round protuberance on the wrists and ankles that has never been fully explained
fashioned:
	 two individuals, carl and someone we'll call floyd, in old-fashioned diving suits. 
fasted:
	running  hey, baby... i'm the fasted man in the world!
fasten:
	  fasten to 
fastest:
	running  i was the fastest man in the world in 1946.
fastidious:
	hobart  chris?  oh, gax, he's so fastidious...!
fatal:
	foster  it's fatal, barnes.  fell on a jagged branch.  tasting bark in my throat even now.
fatherhood:
	marvin my resentful attitude toward fatherhood will yield spiteful and maladjusted children. on my deathbed, i will plead with them for reconciliation. to no avail.
fathers:
	in five seconds, jordan carruthers will either be the new world champion of driving sticks into sleeping fathers' ears, or grounded for life.
fathom:
	woman oh heavens i cannot seem to fathom the elementary nuances of our physical makeup
fatigue:
	513513;  fatigue defies reason
fatten:
	 fatten up for winter at 
fatty:
	nelson  hey fatty, watch where you're going!  don't make me make you cry mayonnaise!
faucet:
	loretta  you replaced a washer in the kitchen faucet.
faults:
	 most likely the possum was, like us all, generally well-intentioned despite having some distinct faults.
favorites:
	- i'm beginning to inhale your brain. you might feel light-headed or dizzy. that's normal. some memories will start to fade. i'd advise thinking really hard about your favorites.
favourite:
	"maybe just stand next to him and say real loudly to someone else "my favourite sexual position is with a werewolf in a crater.""
feard:
	dwight oh yeah well my guy got knives in his feet so he ain't a'feard o' nothin'!
fears:
	phil but it wasn't me!  it didn't have my childhood or my kinks or my aspirations or any of the unspoken fears that color the real me's daily decision-making.
feasibly:
	many municipal power plants already use coal to generate electricity. some enterprising folks have had the clever idea to eliminate the middleman and consume coal directly, using it to power home appliances, vehicles, pets, plants - anything in need of energy. can this be done feasibly and safely? we have investigated, and the answer appears to be no. absolutely not. the notion is ridiculous.
feast:
	on the feast of stephen
feather:
	grace  ...stuck a feather in his cap and called it macaroni!
featured:
	  a fully-featured 
february:
	 since you insist on flaunting your boyfriend everywhere i have no choice but to create my own holiday just for lonely people.  it shall fall on the third monday in february.  it shall be called presidents' day
feeds:
	a squareish design is shown, divided into parts, that say "carpet," "wood," "c8, ny," and "621 b'way." parquet and inlaid floors, borders for rugs, baseboards, decks, crown molding, doors, anything wood feeds our weird fetish.
fees:
	lawyer fees
fei:
	can he do it?  can he top the performance of china's xiao fei shin at last year's international championships?
felicia:
	felicia ...thanks so much for all your help!
felicity:
	lady agnes felicity brunhilde d'summerbottom rather rude of cameron to just not show up.
fella:
	darrow (standing atop a massive fish, rifle in hand) well, i think that pretty much takes care of that.  this fella won't be botherin' no one no more.
felon:
	mr. wiggins  mumpy can't vote, honey.  he's a convicted felon.
feminine:
	 "my pulchritudinous feminine contours"
fencers:
	 that sound you just heard was the four diehard fencers who read wondermark just gasping in delight
fend:
	coin-purse gun.  a weapon to keep handy at all times of day or night.  fend off bothersome insects without danger of injury to others.  provoke comforting touches before boarding aircraft.  $2.00
fender:
	the view closes, framing the torso of the man and the car's front fender. the car appears forlorn.
feral:
	older  and for an instant, you're transported back to a different time, a more feral time, when man hunted his food and life was short...
ferment:
	 ferment at 
ferocious:
	- her majesty queen victoria once levelled a disapproving scowl of such ferocious intensity that none of the servant at buckingham palace were capable of shameful bodily functions for three whole days!
ferree:
	boss ferree thanks
fertile:
	lopez  it is very fertile.  my family has lived here for many generations.
fertilization:
	parent tree your friends. right. listen, kyle. just so you know. it's okay to experiment with cross-fertilization.
fess:
	 'fess up 
fetid:
	man 1 because he was out kidnapping squirrels to torture in twisted experiments. his fetid dungeon is filled with the stench of despair. but no more! the forest need tremble in fear no longer!
fetishism:
	kyra  i've had enough cowboy fetishism for one decade, thank you very much.
feud:
	roderick by frontier law, you must stop if i challenge your mount to a blood-feud honor-duel!
fever:
	 one more glimpse of that alabaster flesh stirs in me a fever i'd but dreampt of on the boldest of painkillers.
feverishly:
	 i worked on the television campaign for the movie 'robots' and at one point we used the james brown song 'dr. detroit' and there is a line that goes, 'get up offa that thang, dance 'til you feel better, get up offa that thang, tryn'ta relieve that pressure' and i swear it was so infectious i had to keep standing up and dancing feverishly before i could go on
fewer:
	ron do you think everyone has the same number of hair follicles?  on the face of it, you'd think of course not.  some people are way hairier than others.  but are they?  or is their hair just thicker and coarser?  even bald people have hair follicles, it's just that fewer of them are active.  i mean, why wouldn't we all have the same number of follicles?  we have the same number of fingers.  i know, i know - some people don't have the same number of fingers.  but that's abnormal.  but - jeez, maybe there's a high rate of abnormality with hair, too.   with so many follicles, the chances of minor mutation during development are very high.  meaning, even if there were some theoretical "ideal" number of follicles, chances are slim that anybody would match that number.  so if there were an ideal number, would we even know?
ffffthhppt:
	<<ffffthhppt>>
ffffthhpt:
	<<ffffthhpt>>
ffrooorrhaa:
	scotty you shoulda seen it.  i never saw a fish charge like that before.  and loud, too - all "grouueeahhh!" and "ffrooorrhaa!" and "rrahhhnn!"
fianc:
	jen my fiancè, or in some accounts my husband, didn't die.  there was a guy who died, but he wasn't my husband.  we weren't wed in a secret hawaiian ceremony.  he was just a dude i was stalking.  it was this whole big thing.  but anyway.  
fiasco:
	jimbo well, we're in a bit of a bind.  some yahoo threw in a rookie and how our columns don't quite balance. ...yeah, it was 31.  i didn't want to say anything, he's still prime and all.  but it's a bit of a fiasco.
fictional:
	otto since money in a credit-based economy is essentially fictional anyway...and there is no way to track individual discrete dollars as they move through the system...it follows that wholly invented backstories for every dollar are completely valid by virtue of being impossible to disprove.
fiddle:
	charlotte - no, richard, i'm tired of it!  i'm tired of playing second fiddle to that stupid robot!
fiddling:
	 a ton of sunk costs have gone into this food. you can't just toss it! that's sociopathic. that's nero, fiddling while rome burns. the food version.
fiddy:
	hy  two fiddy.
fidelity:
	fidelity mutual hath defiled themselves before me.  thou shalt put their executive board to the sword.
fidget:
	 the color guard is nervously tittering.  the brass band has fainted from exertion.  the mayor is beginning to check his pocketwatch and fidget with his sash.
fielders:
	john and doesn't having fielders convey a lack of confidence in the pitcher?  "we really don't think you can throw a no-hitter, so we put eight other guys out there to clean up your messes."  "don't try hard or anything."  oh and hey, what if the pitcher started using a tennis ball?  just like whipped it out?  you think anyone'd notice?
fielding:
	 cell phone lines were jammed.  everyone was so busy fielding concerned calls from out-of-state relatives that they didn't notice the giant meteor oh noooooooo
fiercely:
	men in each other's arms, dancing fiercely, perhaps even wrestling
fiftieth:
	melanie  but this is my fiftieth draft!
figgy:
	morty  then you should totally come over.  scrooge gave us way too much figgy pudding.
figs:
	stavros  for me it would be mediterreanean olives, yougurts, figs and dates!
fiiiightiiiing:
	horace yelling at a piece of paper, a stone, and a pair of scissors stop fiiiightiiiing
fillings:
	sol  i...i sold my own fillings to have that mortgage paid off by christmas.
films:
	409409;  a leon films a commercial
filtered:
	bart that way, the attendees can actually be present!  meanwhile, the sketch artist will sit in the corner and capture impressions of the ceremony.  later on we'll send everybody a booklet of the drawings.  moments filtered in chalk, not razor-sharp photos of everybody's dandruff.
filters:
	 i saw that spread and man, he wasn't kidding around with those gauze filters
filth:
	- your work is absolutely the vilest filth i have ever seen! who would pose for this garbage?
finalists:
	the four finalists in a costume contest are dressed as a native american, the statue of liberty, a valkyrie and a soldier.
financing:
	sten great house, right?   do you already have financing?  down payment?  check out these french doors, this patio...
finch:
	- i'll eat a live finch for a buck.
finches:
	- spare change, miss? feed a man and his finches for another day?
findings:
	bearded  things my vantage point allows me to see, that the real -world station managers may miss. each month i send them a letter with my findings!
fingertips:
	  now come along, i have a hundred bottles for you to fill with luminous psychoplasma from your fingertips.
finishes:
	old  you'll not hear much of anything once my cynthia finishes initiating her binary defense protocols!
finishing:
	projects are stackable. it's not that i'm starting something new before finishing something old - i'm nesting the new project inside the old. if it has screws, they shall be turned. if it has bolts, they shall be loosened. if it has rivets, they may get along for a while without being pried open, but that probably won't last.
fins:
	brian don't strike any beings with your fins
firefighting:
	 we know the corporations are bad at self-policing. let's hope they're just as bad at self-firefighting.
fireplace:
	a bearded man in a suit resting on a fireplace's mantelpiece with his back turned.  there is a woman sitting in a chair, we see her profile.  the two are looking at each other.
firing:
	cut to a scene of a man being executed by a firing squad.
firm:
	goat is firm but fair.
fisherman:
	a fisherman appears.  he's bigger than the bear.
fistfight:
	culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.
fixation:
	 sometimes i wonder what your fixation is with watching strangers give birth.
fixedly:
	woman at left, behind gax, looks on disapprovingly,eyebrows slightly raised, her eyes fixed on the aliens as she hears his reaction.  gax, just left of center, holding his walking stick in his right hand like moses' rod, does not appear any too enthused to see the aliens.  on the right, the two aliens, with bodies like plucked uncooked chickens except with armlike appendages instead of wings, ending in two grotesque long ced fingers, stare fixedly up at gax as he makes his pronouncement.  the bulging eyes of one show dismay; the other looks shocked or startled.
flags:
	man 2 well, what now?  what should we ask them?  do we trade flags or something?
flahg:
	woman 2 ayplej ahleejanz tooda flahg uvdaa yooneye teydstay tsava merraka
flailing:
	gentleman in various positions of flailing arms and legs throughout comic
flails:
	254254;  mike flails around for a while
flakes:
	second gentle awful. lettuce was wilted, and the dressing appeared to be just mayonnaise with flakes of parsley sort of drowned in it.
flaking:
	calvin oh, i've searched for it for ages.  pored through dusty stacks to no avail.  searched every catalog i could get my grubby paws on?but where i failed, lad, you prevailed.  tell me!  how did you locate it?  on which remove bookshelf did you peep its flaking spine?
flap:
	reginald  you know, soar.  flappity-flap like a bird, or however it does it.
flappity:
	reginald  you know, soar.  flappity-flap like a bird, or however it does it.
flared:
	abstruse depiction of a hand putting some sort of ring on a cylinder thing with a flared end
flash:
	 every fifteen minutes it goes awhoooogaa and red lights flash and sprinklers come on
flashback:
	otto narrating the flashback of the assault they said, "we hear you've been collecting money for the act of shuffling imaginary things around.  we hear you're being a worthless parasite, inventing new ways to enrich yourself while adding nothing to the value of the world!"
flashes:
	light on captain pike's wheelchair flashes once
flat:
	yuri the flat brush will give me good covera--
flattered:
	bonnie ?i guess i should feel flattered?
flaunting:
	 since you insist on flaunting your boyfriend everywhere i have no choice but to create my own holiday just for lonely people.  it shall fall on the third monday in february.  it shall be called presidents' day
flavored:
	yousef not quite.  i got tired of licking envelopes.   so instead i've been developing meat-flavored envelope glue...figure i'll put this freeloader to work a bit.
flavors:
	 the project was to taste-test delicious new flavors of ice cream!  imaginary dan missed out
flaw:
	 the critical flaw of the appointment system
flawed:
	josh  absolutely none.  in fact, less than none, considering what information i do have is irrevocably flawed.
fleas:
	effie (taking a bath) riddle me this how is it that a hotel with gourmet coffee and 400-thread-count sheets can't provide a bar of soap that doesn't make you feel like you've rolled around in a basket of fleas for an hour?  isn't humanity past that point in soap technology?
fled:
	 listen to this. "the murder then fled to a hotel in monkey box, florida." monkey box florida. the name of the town is monkey box.
flexible:
	035035;  opinions prove flexible
flicks:
	  he coolly flicks a cigarette butt over the edge, turning and walking away before the mark has even hit bottom.  the hundred grand will be in his bank account by the time he reaches his car. 
flinging:
	  next comes the agitated, spittle-flinging air-boxing
flirting:
	all your interactions colored by people either flirting with you or judging you.  sometimes both simultaneously.
floating:
	 floating around, tape measure cing in zero-g like a wispy line of yellow smoke -- that's the stuff
flock:
	the strawberry dispenses a flock of butterflies.
floorboard:
	when i die, you must rush immediately to the barn.  find the box hidden beneath the fourteenth floorboard.
floors:
	a squareish design is shown, divided into parts, that say "carpet," "wood," "c8, ny," and "621 b'way." parquet and inlaid floors, borders for rugs, baseboards, decks, crown molding, doors, anything wood feeds our weird fetish.
floss:
	 mental floss  
flourish:
	cynthia i will flourish here!  the soil is rich with nitrates!  better than that carpeting in your apartment!
flowering:
	carlos our planet's name is mexico.  it means "fragrant flowering fruit" in our native tongue.  prior cultures have called it by other names.  guatemala.  honduras.  el salvador.  nicaragua.
flowing:
	 troubleshooting the injector becomes clogged after veinous insertion. solution pump foot-pedal vigorously. potato will resume flowing.
fluff:
	 fluff and fold 
fluoridated:
	older  and you feel a sadness, in a way, because the chicken you eat today is factory-farmed, and your teeth are artificially strenghtened by fluoridated water, and you wonder if you would even survive back then...
flustered:
	bart fine, new idea - we dress like bank robbers and the minister is the flustered bank manager.  the attendees all have to like on the floor and be very quiet no heroes
fluttering:
	 they will breathe with gills that make the sound of fluttering pages.
flyers:
	thea there's not gonna be a tournament.  nobody's gonna show up.  i know we've worked hard, with the flyers, the radio spots, and lord knows the skywriting wasn't cheap...
flynt:
	 not pictured wwi-era german officers in pointy helmets, fakirs, stripes-wearing prisoners complete with shackles and iron balls, larry flynt
flywheel:
	inventor friction-recapturing inner flywheel. water-resistant to 18 meters. sixty-seven individual servomotors. bluetooth built into the heel.
foaming:
	 foaming lips 
fogey:
	old ant ...but listen to me. i'm just an old fogey staring hard at the grave. at my age, you regret not taking care of your health most of all.
foggy:
	i admit to being a bit foggy on the kinesiology.
fohrwitchi:
	woman 2 antooda reypuh blik fohrwitchi stan
foil:
	 also they have installed moles at the x-ray machines who foil imperialism by working reeeeally slowly
foils:
	ariel misbehavior has become his palette, our apartment his canvas, in a grand, grotesque installation - featuring us as predictable foils, our fury as much a deliberate part of the work as each precisely-browned fiber of shag.  more than a simple befoulment - this is a befoulment of order, a metaphorical poop-smear on the very notion of animal subjugation.
fold:
	 fluff and fold 
folksy:
	right are you talking about real radishes and an actual dog creamery or is this all  some kind of weird folksy idiom?
fondness:
	eel arrghh!  my fondness for biting at glittery things has horribly backfired!   but i am nothing if not a fish of honor.   what's your question?
font:
	recipient well, one is a regular card...but the other says, 'we are the only true taylors all others are space alien imposters.' in a font that looks like...blood drips?
fooling:
	 decipher  /  i don't know who she thinks she's fooling but those spiracles are not real.
foolishness:
	father o'malley james this is no time for your foolishness
foompf:
	<<foompf>>
football:
	what if they ask me about football
footer:
	footer guest comic by greg peters (suspect-device.com)
footman:
	footman (offpanel)  your majesty, the prime minister's here to see you?
foppishly:
	a black man sits speaking with a foppishly-dressed white man.
forbid:
	mr. mikey i don't have candy!  all i can offer you is the peace of mind that only comes from knowing that if (god forbid) you're pooped on, you'll be a-ok.
forcibly:
	 the man is checking his email for the steps to a dance that will forcibly repel ants from his trousers.  he has a chronic condition.
foreclose:
	alberta we have to get the papers in by morning or they foreclose on the house.
foreheads:
	 they are squeezing coins in their hands, forging them into barbed metal spikes that they are driving through the foreheads of the -- yes yes we know it's tuesday geez
foreknowledge:
	evan mom and dad slipped up and revealed foreknowledge of certain presents that were ostensibly from "santa."
foreman:
	walt we're still reporting on the tragic case of forty miners trapped in a cave-in.  with us live is mine foreman eustace prowlybucket.
foreplay:
	 death is the lover of us all, and he knows no foreplay.
forfeit:
	for any intern thou hast raped, thou must forfeit one sick day.
forge:
	 forge ahead 
forging:
	 they are squeezing coins in their hands, forging them into barbed metal spikes that they are driving through the foreheads of the -- yes yes we know it's tuesday geez
forgive:
	mother  forgive me
forgotten:
	101101;  a crime is discovered, and forgotten
forkery:
	 as your attorney i must advise you toin the future obtain signed releases prior to any further episodes of forkery
forks:
	carla (to herself)  his pans aren't greased...there's forks in the microwave...the milk jug is in the oven...
forlornly:
	mack and mabel, sitting forlornly in a room.
formation:
	karl when you squeeze the tube, you generate energy.  this powers a chemical reaction that results in the formation of a semi-solid mass.  which plops out the end.  theoretically it's unlimited!  but because of the half-life of the chemical catalysts, each reaction requires twice as much energy as the one before.
formed:
	"3. our simple pattern for the box (left) includes hinged walls held in shape with cotter pins. this way, should you fail to complete construction of the box itself, you may simply remove the pins and place the loose pieces within the general shape of the half-formed box. this recursiveness cuts down on waste."
forms:
	man 2 they're inventing new forms of life so somebody will be able to properly experience the incendiary fullness of this heat.
formuals:
	kid 1 i bet you sold secret magic lollipop formuals to the chinese.
formulas:
	a girl is sitting on a bench, opposite a boy. behind the boy is a machine of some sort, and a wall on which are written numerous equations and formulas. a second girl is sitting nearer the machine.
formulating:
	bart turns out i just like formulating arguments!
forsaken:
	geno your pockets are so soft.  so inviting.  "put your hands in us," they whisper.  "why have you forsaken us? do you not love us anymore?"
fort:
	eugene the dollars in jefferson's and ford's times were on the gold standard!  they corresponded to specific lumps of metal in fort knox!  your arrogant attempt to place yourself at the crossroads of history must begin in 1933 at the earliest!
fortress:
	093093;  a fortress is breached
fortunately:
	fortunately, he has a nice bakelite cell phone in his steam-powered car.
forum:
	glen his myspace username "guent-to-the-choppa" also shows up on an old yu-gi-oh forum.  that isn't online anymore, but the internet archive has a cached version.
forums:
	"bobby pflugelblager is rad. he's super active on the cracked.com fan forums, plus drew carey re-tweeted one of his twitpics like a year ago."
forwards:
	elmer y'ever notice how cashiers nowadays count your change forwards?
fossil:
	son oil is a fossil fuel!
fought:
	julio reminds me of the time i fought off a grizzly!
foul:
	todd has donned a surgical cap and mask.  he stands over a table on which a baby lies.  he scowls and a foul miasma of disgust emanates from his head.
fouling:
	captain  there's nothin' i can do!  somethin's fouling up my controls!
foundation:
	 go close to the eanna temple, the residence of ishtar, such as no later king or man equaled!  go up the wall of uruk and walk around, examine its foundation, inspect its brickwork thoroughly.  go 0.8 miles on broadview terrace, then bear slight right turn and turn onto california avenue, for your destination will be on the right.
foundry:
	- ah! i see you've fired up the old latex foundry. never too late to take over the family business, then?
fourth:
	felix landing whew!  made it to fourth avenue and back in eighteen seconds!
foxy:
	yo, what's a couple of foxy ladies like you doing out in an alley this late?
fractions:
	jimbo on the phone hey, 35!  how are ya?  it's jimbo.  how's life?  how're the fractions?  they grow up so fast, huh?  they'll be integers before you know it.  listen, remember last april?  we put you in that ledger that went national?
frail:
	simmons  such a frail and vulnerable animal - i wonder what defense at all it has against predators!
frailties:
	father each day you must reassert your primacy anew over your own destiny. and all the while, your body will daily discover new and horrid frailties in its slow, inexorable march towards death.
framed:
	a woman's framed by a windowpane.
france:
	 you do not have to explain how you were shot out of a cannon over occupied france in order to give me your opinion on sandwiches
franchise:
	506506; a franchise opportunity
franks:
	stu why does that guy always buy so much sausage?  he must have a hundred pounds of franks on that cart!  and last week he got twice as much!
frantically:
	unnoticed by bill is a one-legged man, hopping frantically from the same direction jake came.
frat:
	big hilarious frat prank?
fraternize:
	 fraternize 
fraught:
	490490;  parenthood is fraught
fray:
	passersby join fray, one lady with bird on hat, or robin hood
frayed:
	i swear, getting you to move is like a lame, one-legged ancestor of a sloth who's twice as slow trying to use a frayed old piece of crunchy vine to pull a cruise ship!
frazzled:
	dede frazzled martin that was a metaphor.
freaks:
	before the internet, he's alone and miserable...but now he's on a message-board full of friendly, like-minded freaks reassuring each other that they don't need to conform to some marketing-driven farce of "normality" to be happy!
fred:
	fred barney, i asked where you wanted to have lunch.
freed:
	the train races through a town, freed from the confines of railway tracks.
freedoms:
	juan well i don't appreciate the many freedoms and privileges afforded by living in a post-industrial society!
freeee:
	- you know, "i'll beat anyone's advertised price or your peyote is freeee!!!"
freeing:
	ma akcer that way, i'll eventually grow tired of looking every time you kids act nervous, thus freeing you to cause all sorts of mischief!
freelancers:
	harken to my words, ye servants of the most high, and ye freelancers too
freeloader:
	yousef not quite.  i got tired of licking envelopes.   so instead i've been developing meat-flavored envelope glue...figure i'll put this freeloader to work a bit.
freeloaders:
	some bizarre device is displayed. business, pleasure; men, boys. all must earn their own way. children should learn quickly that the real world is made of labor. put them to work at once. no coddling. beware of infant freeloaders.
freezes:
	hans then the dog starts barking.  piano starts playing by itself.  bam!  my tea freezes over.  flour hits the ground and it's spiders.  little white spiders running around like mad.  we want to scream but none of us can stop farting
freezing:
	- i'm done living on the freezing streets. i'm done wiping windshields for crack money. and frankly, i'm done with "us." i'm going back to my palatial mansion with my six dozen servants and my cabana boy, julio.
frequency:
	 okay, now that i've pledged, what's the secret frequency with no more program breaks?
frequent:
	 the frequent-buyer punch cards didn't really end up working out.
fretting:
	everyone has experienced trouble related to insufficient potato consumption. but how to make time for the labor involved in regular kitchen preparation? with the potato injector, the time for fretting is past. using surgical-grade tubing, the injector pipes pulped potato nectar into your body intravenously.
freud:
	 that's freud at the end there, in case you couldn't tell
friction:
	inventor friction-recapturing inner flywheel. water-resistant to 18 meters. sixty-seven individual servomotors. bluetooth built into the heel.
friday:
	friday 5am-11pm
frighten:
	foster  will you dry her tears when lightning, tornadoes and sun frighten her?
frightened:
	a minotaur emerges from the side. the knight is frightened.
frightfully:
	professor i first made the acquaintance of young master malki ! when he came under my tutelage at oxford -- introduction to mad biochemistry, as i recall. frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. "malki !, my lad," i told him on more than one occasion, "if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then i fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world." but some boys just refuse to listen.
frisk:
	bart think about the weddings we've attended recently.  apparently everybody believes the event will be criminally under-documented.  everyone's watching the ceremony through their camera.  might as well be watching on tv.  at our wedding, we collect cameras at the door.  we frisk people.
frito:
	man 1 man, i thought dole was a big, happy pineapple-plantation kind of place!  not some corporate subsidiary of the evil frito-lay empire!
frivolous:
	marc oh, i thought it was obvious when i said "i don't let society's frivolous protocols take precedence over my personal values."
froglike:
	two women and a man stare at a deformed froglike creature standing upright
frolicking:
	rolf if you see movement, call it in.  if you see a squirrel, call it in.  if you see two weird-looking leaves in a row, call it in.  if you see adorable deer frolicking lustily in a meadow, it is probably enemy agents in rented costumes trying to lower your guard.  shoot them and then call it in.
frosted:
	 additionally, my frosted whipped beverage summons lads to my garden
frottley:
	chip frottley why your head so tiny
frown:
	the man looks suspicious. the salesman's head grows even larger - it is now perhaps 1.5x taller than the man's. he looks very angry and his mouth grows into a huge, gaping frown - he could easily swallow the other man's head.
frowning:
	the grandpa's image disappears, becoming the reflection of the woman once again, though now she is frowning
froze:
	 he had been to a machine that predicted his death.  receiving 'scale,' he kept himself trim and avoided shipyards and truckstops.  and then, when maurice entered the room with his large eel, his blood froze.
frozen:
	a big metal cylinder marked cryo-stor (tm) holds the frozen body of a bearded man.
frrbggnngglbb:
	darrow no, it was more of a "frrbggnngglbb!" or like a "snnrblnkk!"
frugality:
	very new frugality.
fruits:
	eel fresh fruits and vegetables.
frustrating:
	nice  oh sir, i do apologize. i do apologize for the terrible inconvenience. today must have been very frustrating. i do apologize.
frustration:
	animated terry's puppet attacks zeke's leg in frustration.
frwhbrrnxg:
	 frwhbrrnxg 
fssshhhh:
	<<fssshhhh>>
fssshhhttt:
	<<fssshhhttt>>
fugly:
	no, i'm gracie o'fugly.
fulfillment:
	culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.
fullness:
	man 2 they're inventing new forms of life so somebody will be able to properly experience the incendiary fullness of this heat.
functionally:
	andrew you said it - she acts affectionate and friendly, and i'm satisfied with that.  however, her cashew-sized cat brain may be conceptualizing the situation as immaterial, since our existing relationship is perfectly serviceable.  functionally, she loves me!
functioned:
	yuri i do not understand how human beings functioned before the invention of pharmaceuticals.  the pyramids!  the great wall of china!  railroads crossing continents!
fundamental:
	  i'm always afraid that i'm lacking some fundamental human trait that everyone else has but always just thinks is too obvious to ever talk about.
fundamentally:
	woman we have established a wintergreen napkin palette.  these turquoise pepper mills you found suggest a fundamentally southwestern character.
fundraising:
	apparatchik komrade kringle! perheps i tink ve should do more of de party fundraising and less of de party line, da?
funky:
	 get funky at 
funneled:
	luxembourg  remember how, when russia was crashing at afghanistan's place, you funneled weapons to the mujahideen to drive him out?
furious:
	 i will send them both a furious, rambling email explaining in detail how carefree i actually am
furiously:
	he lifts off, copter blades spinning furiously.
furnaces:
	 i felt a chill as the ghost swept through me to alight on the distributor cap.  "there is corrosion," it hissed in a voice blasted for centuries by the immortal furnaces of hades, "on the spark plug wire contacts."
furrowing:
	dawn too late!  we've moved on to the oil spill in the gulf of mexico!  it's so tragic it makes hamlet look like 3-2-1 contact!  it's the worst marine disaster since noah's flood!  everyone is very concerned!  brow-furrowing is at an all-time high!
furthermore:
	 furthermore, i am appalled that anyone would require chemical aids to achieve euphoria
furthest:
	furthest dodo the time! he has it!
furtive:
	- and so i just sit there, and he's all "i feel coarse and unworthy in your presence, so i'll just go." this after hours of furtive glances he turns and leaves.
furtively:
	alex furtively peers through his venetian blinds...
fury:
	ariel misbehavior has become his palette, our apartment his canvas, in a grand, grotesque installation - featuring us as predictable foils, our fury as much a deliberate part of the work as each precisely-browned fiber of shag.  more than a simple befoulment - this is a befoulment of order, a metaphorical poop-smear on the very notion of animal subjugation.
fusion:
	 i don't know why business is doing so poorly. everyone says they love our new hobo fusion menu!
fussy:
	- and make me look happy, you know? not too fussy...
futility:
	- sometimes i overstock my cart just to make her yell at me... her cries of desperate futility are so hot.
fuzzypants:
	they call me fuzzypants mcgee. but you can call me tigrour.
fweep:
	cynthia (said mechanically) fweep?
fwooosh:
	<<fwooosh>>
fwoosh:
	fwoosh
gaahh:
	ralph  gaahh!  i hate parking!
gaahhh:
	ralph  gaahhh!!
gabriella:
	i mean, don't get me wrong, it's a lot of work for our housemaid gabriella.
gadget:
	"wow" gadget.  what does it do?  we have not been able to determine, but it looks very impressive resting casually on a desk.  appear learned to friends.  $7.75
gaga:
	 you know how i used to be all gaga over that poodle down the block? well, funny thing--now when i look at her all i can think is high maintenance
gah:
	- gah! i've burst my scabs!
gain:
	people hear the slogan and think they know the issue.  however, concepts have to trade away complexity to gain widespread appeal!
gained:
	a woman is shown wearing a corset. dr. warner's health corset, with skirt supporter and self-adjusting pads, is on sale now. only one available - this is dr. warner's actual personal item. it took a while but i finally gained her trust. her loss is your bargain! smells like doctor. 351 broadway, n.y.
gaining:
	rich we're still gaining, on average, another year of life every five years.  thanks to medicine, technology, the iphone, etc.
galactic:
	mr. gax if elected, i pledge to feed all humans over sixty into the insatiable furnace of my galactic death-cruiser
gall:
	senator kickback  you have some gall, mr. morton!  there's no way i'm adding this rider to the education act!
gallbladder:
	bernardo got cysts in my gut. calcium in my gallbladder. spurs in my joints. some kind of parasite living in my spine, and over a dozen different types of gout.
galleries:
	pablo do you know who i am?  i am pablo!  i have shot covers for elle and cosmo and portuguese vogue!  i am paid ten thousand dollars for a single perfect photograph!  my work fills the finest galleries, the most luxurious hotels, the homes and summer homes and yachts and summer yachts of the world's elite!  and you want me to take a tourist snapshot?  of you?
gallon:
	 then, with a mighty caw, the beast whirled and dumped a gallon of chalky white right on rosa's bonnet
galore:
	 bargains galore at 
galvanized:
	floyd you don't own the water, carl! i fixed the problem! the canvas just needed to be galvanized! now move aside and let me dive!
gamble:
	 'we have taken a gamble as to whether people will pay 8.95 to feel like they are the sort who would invent something, given the time, and it seems to be paying off.'
gander:
	- if you look real close, you can see the dot were i jabbed her with my pencil. go on, take a gander, she don't mind.
gangrene:
	- gangrene took my fingers... i hope your health care can pay for a helper monkey!
gangsters:
	eugene gangsters?
gannah:
	- ahyah gannah havvah obbawayt?
gap:
	reverse angle.  the man is peering through the gap between his thumb and forefinger.  he smiles.
gaping:
	the man looks suspicious. the salesman's head grows even larger - it is now perhaps 1.5x taller than the man's. he looks very angry and his mouth grows into a huge, gaping frown - he could easily swallow the other man's head.
garages:
	sheldon are we still doing this?  seriously?  this stereotype is still clinging to life?  first, the "nerds are all frustrated virgins" thing.  some of the nerdiest people i know are highly sexual women.  and millions of nerds have spouses twice as nerdy as they are.  and the mom's basement thing?  the nerds i know live in geodesic domes or multi-story treehouses or, at the very least, condos with garages big enough to hold their trebuchets.
garb:
	a couple in wedding garb stand before reverend grump, a buffalo.
garbageman:
	 someone bought it for a birthday she didn't want to attend, the recipient hated it, the dude at the goodwill threw it away and the garbageman destroyed it.
gardens:
	a contraption with black paper sticking out "4. x-ray viewers are great for spot-checking leaves for suspicious veining. good gardens need a lot of work and attention."
gargantuan:
	a stereoscopic image gus, atop his giant eagle glenda, attempts to lasso the piggybacked and gargantuan anthropomorphized hippos anton and jay.  mount banjo erupts  dramatically in the background.
garish:
	main panel you've been marketed to!  some douche sent an intrusion using marketing  we don't believe you've seen enough commercial messages today!  we firmly believe that web content should serve no greater purpose than to attract eyeballs that we can cram full of ads.  and since you've already proven you're dumb enough to spend a dollar on an imaginary "gift," why shouldn't we press our luck?  we know that garish, omni-present ads eventually drove you away from myspace, but we figure we can get a good six months' worth of impressions out of you before you get fed up with us, too!
garlic:
	- stakes and garlic! fetch me kerosene!
garlicky:
	woman no! your breath is all garlicky! i only kiss minty freshness!
garnish:
	 well i brought a garnish
garrison:
	radio you know, garrison's right. it's listeners like you that make public radio possible.
garroting:
	francis (still fighting off the soldier)  i wanted garroting!
gasket:
	alberta then we've got billy's juvie hearing, but the car blew a head gasket, so we'll have to leave at five am to catch the bus.   also, the basement is flooded, your mother keeps calling, and i'm pregnant.
gasoline:
	man #1 i guess that would explain the giant, pulsating strawberry slowly drinking from a steaming mug of gasoline.
gasparov:
	 kerry gasparov at the top of his form
gatekeeper:
	 find the gatekeeper at 
gathers:
	bart we'll be up front hearing people cough and shuffle around, while cameras all around us are capturing instants, preserving the most fleeting of glances, showing us (and those to come after us) more than we could ever notice on our own.  in a way, the day when everyone gathers and performs the ceremony is simply a run-through for the cameras.  the documentary evidence is what lasts forever.
gauge:
	 i never have a tire pressure gauge when i need one.  but if it was built into my phone?  road safety get on it
gauze:
	 i saw that spread and man, he wasn't kidding around with those gauze filters
gawk:
	down on the shore, passers-by gawk and point at the sight of pat and his glider helplessly entangled in the power and phone lines.
geared:
	radislov what if i told you i'd written an investment book not geared towards gullible suckers?  one specifically for cynical, pragmatic types?
gears:
	in a burst of sound, a complicated device of gears, wheels, and several horns springs from the top of the bum's hat!
gee:
	- as you can see, our portable device saves the patient the embarassment and awkwardness of the traditional stirrups and speculum. - i'll begin the exam by inserting a small amount of lubricating paste to help her open and allow light in. - gee! - nurse, please bring in a dose of gyno-paste. (my own formula.) - you may experience some slight discomfort. - hope you're not allergic to peanut butter.  get a clue at   modesty, chastity, virtue
geezer:
	crusty bill everyone older than me is a geezer!  everyone younger 'n me is a kid!
gendarmes:
	 gendarmes
gender:
	 guys gender reassignment surgery is a very delicate subject for many people and i'll thank you not to trivialize it for a cheap gag okay seriously [
generically:
	old ant what with your absurd musical taste, generically rebellious nature, and unfamiliar/threatening media-consumption habits 
genghis:
	- how about genghis khan swanson.  idi amin swanson.  james k. polk swanson.  rudolf diesel swanson.
genital:
	 still? don't tell me it's the genital warts again.
genitals:
	guido hey, this dude wants to put pictures of his wanger into the article about genitals.  we're fine with that, right?
genius:
	headline  genius
genocide:
	amy  "although basic courtesy doesn't explain foreign genocide, highly-intuitive japanese kids let machines narrate old people's quiet recollections, seeking to ultimately vanquish wichita's xenophobic young zealots."
genres:
	  specious argument #61 in favor of sci-fi being the best of all genres
gentrifies:
	desmond i'd also like everyone to start wearing feathers - to make new residents feel welcome as the area inevitably gentrifies.  it's time to add some biodiversity to our little subdivision!
geo:
	045045;  geo-politics stymy
geodesic:
	sheldon are we still doing this?  seriously?  this stereotype is still clinging to life?  first, the "nerds are all frustrated virgins" thing.  some of the nerdiest people i know are highly sexual women.  and millions of nerds have spouses twice as nerdy as they are.  and the mom's basement thing?  the nerds i know live in geodesic domes or multi-story treehouses or, at the very least, condos with garages big enough to hold their trebuchets.
geography:
	doctor i showed your charts to a radiologist, an oncologist, and my kid sister, who once got a b+ in geography.
geometrics:
	platonic friends?  pluralistic ignorance?  planar geometrics?  planck's constant?  plastic bags that could suffocate children?
georgia:
	walt breaking news.  tragedy strikes eastern europe as a trainload of irradiated hamsters derails in the former soviet republic of georgia.
georgie:
	i totally have a little tiny baby kittycat man named georgie-cat.
geraldo:
	geraldo it's all we have left
gerbil:
	delia yeah, for an eighty percent slowdown all we'd need is what, 50 gallons of gerbil blood?
gettim:
	- that's right, spike, gettim! get that bad man! go on! you dumb mutt, where you going? get him! go on! he's right there! get him!
gettin:
	 yeah! laundry gettin' done!
ghod:
	 ghod you emo kids
gibberish:
	jimmy you see, all human language is descended from a mother, animal tongue.  to the beasts, our yammering, overenunciated dialects sound like so much chittering gibberish!
gibbous:
	 omg you were conceived during a waxing gibbous whale migration too?? soul mates
giddily:
	smiling giddily, he listens to morse code on headphones.
giddiness:
	270270;  giddiness is annoying
giddy:
	 he was all giddy while paying the registration fee
giddyup:
	 giddyup to 
giggling:
	 some giggling idiot probably waited in the bushes for an hour, but i never came back outside.
gigs:
	bruce we will need to perform a complex and incredibly expensive musical exorcism.  luckily, i just happen to be in a band!  we can probably squeeze you in between our incredibly important gigs in the courts of popes worldwide
gilgamesh:
	violet  well i guess we'd have to gather around  campfire to sing the epic of gilgamesh is that what you want me to say
gin:
	 whiskey, gin, vodka, spearmint schnapps...
ginalize:
	the rest of the banner reads --ginalize my opinions.
ginormous:
	oliver (offpanel) "ginormous."
git:
	  git along to 
gita:
	and this is the bhagavad-gita, very famous book!  see, even gandhi read it, you heard of gandhi!
glancing:
	two lovely women, one standing facing the door with what appears to be a riding crop tucked under her arm, and drawing on a pair of gloves.  we'll call her elaine.  the other, wendy, is sitting at the table, looking at elaine.  elaine's back is to wendy, and she is glancing over her shoulder.
glare:
	  more likely, you'll glare coldly for a second, then huff, say 'anyway,' and continue with your diatribe.  i mean, let's be clear about the stakes here.
glarp:
	 oh please!  i couldn't possiblsnarf glarp nom nom blarg chomp chew charmp grahmwragfgh could we get some napkins over here?
gledelig:
	 gledelig jul 
gleeful:
	in the soap processing plant, the contaminants become clear molten soap is being poured through a gleeful man's crack on its way to becoming new bars
glenda:
	a stereoscopic image gus, atop his giant eagle glenda, attempts to lasso the piggybacked and gargantuan anthropomorphized hippos anton and jay.  mount banjo erupts  dramatically in the background.
glistening:
	second woman like a meadow in springtime, or a brisk blade of grass, glistening with dew. you are a nurturer! you are strong!
glittery:
	eel arrghh!  my fondness for biting at glittery things has horribly backfired!   but i am nothing if not a fish of honor.   what's your question?
glob:
	sergei  that means it's moving!  all afternoon, while you walk, talk, and play games, a wet glob of sandwich will be crawling through your guts!
globs:
	josh but viscous bile drips from their ragged flesh, searing the earth in pancake-sized globs of corroding
glonded:
	 okay, then next i have glonder and glondee. also glonded, glonding, and glondt which is of course the purperfect
glondee:
	 okay, then next i have glonder and glondee. also glonded, glonding, and glondt which is of course the purperfect
glonden:
	 plus all the variants "he will have glonden", "he would have ben glondering" ...
glonder:
	 okay, then next i have glonder and glondee. also glonded, glonding, and glondt which is of course the purperfect
glondering:
	 plus all the variants "he will have glonden", "he would have ben glondering" ...
glonding:
	 okay, then next i have glonder and glondee. also glonded, glonding, and glondt which is of course the purperfect
glondxhatzoljlg:
	woman #2 you're telling me you got all those but you missed glondxhatzoljlg?
glorious:
	a couple is in the glorious outdoors
glorp:
	the clue for 21 down is "?? glorp."
glove:
	  keep a roll in the kitchen!  one in your purse!  even one in the glove compartment.  burrito tape is the only tortilla-repair apparatus you need.
gloves:
	two lovely women, one standing facing the door with what appears to be a riding crop tucked under her arm, and drawing on a pair of gloves.  we'll call her elaine.  the other, wendy, is sitting at the table, looking at elaine.  elaine's back is to wendy, and she is glancing over her shoulder.
glues:
	 there must be a gentleman's agreement between envelope manufacturers to make their glues taste uniformly like ass
glum:
	man in top hat why so glum?
glummifying:
	 and that's glummifying because...
gluten:
	helene can i interest you in our new organic probiotic gluten-free raw energy bar?
gnawing:
	- oh, you know. gnawing out burrs, the occasional alfalfa gorging. you?
gnxbinrff:
	scotty "gnxbinrff!  hnjyvrnglz!  krvngblarwx!  pkiznvvq!"
gobbling:
	text his innocent appearance is for gobbling children up
goddamn:
	malki ! thank god that's done! higgins, where's my goddamn appletini?! denise, cancel my appointments. and fire higgins.
goddess:
	 ski trip.  very dangerous.  if you never see me again- if i don't survive- always know - i loved you as best a man could love a goddess.
goiters:
	331331;  nobody gets goiters
goku:
	garfield i hate mondays / goku then we must destroy them rrrraaaaarrrgh
golf:
	woman how come he gets to use a golf club?
goliath:
	600600; david and goliath
gon:
	woman where is he -- let me at the bastard -- next time you try to pay off a jilted lover, david !, you'd best be sure the check don't bounce. fool gon' wish he'd been born without eyeballs, once i gets to stabbin'.
goodbars:
	hulda ah, we're out of mr. goodbars.
gooder:
	the cannon! eat lead, do-gooder!
goof:
	 goof'd!
googled:
	glen first i googled the slogan from that crazy patch on his brother's backpack.  it's some obscure band with only like a hundred facebook fans.  found his brother there, and of course he's friends with his brother.
goopy:
	 i can think of a dozen things i would rather do than watch a goopy infant emerge from... from a... i would rather clean the garage.
gopher:
	the hollow top half of a ball "3. instead of discarding the half-balls left over from a game of slice-the-ball-in-the-garden, use them to cap off leaky sprinklers or plug gopher holes. the rubber balls are biodegradable, given a long enough timeline."
gorax:
	king what in the name of gorax
gored:
	mark  he appears to have been gored by antlers, then devoured!
gorging:
	- oh, you know. gnawing out burrs, the occasional alfalfa gorging. you?
gospel:
	 every word the gospel truth
gotcha:
	chuck gotcha.
goth:
	 note for international readers hot topic is a store found in suburban shopping malls.  they sell a bizarre combination of naughty novelties, goth gear like corsets and boots, and trendy logo shirts with 'clever' sayings and nintendo characters and the emblems of punk rock bands that were big a decade before the average customer was born.  it is the dictionary definition of over-the-counter counterculture.
gothic:
	horace ?i look around the store and i realize why i'm kind of dizzy.  the sign on the counter is in comic sans.  on the window it's copperplate gothic.  and on the receipt it's monotype corsiva.  monotype corsiva!  so i said that's it!  i'll never again patronize any business that uses any typeface i can recognize!
gots:
	- dude, he gots cheese!
gourmet:
	effie (taking a bath) riddle me this how is it that a hotel with gourmet coffee and 400-thread-count sheets can't provide a bar of soap that doesn't make you feel like you've rolled around in a basket of fleas for an hour?  isn't humanity past that point in soap technology?
gout:
	bernardo got cysts in my gut. calcium in my gallbladder. spurs in my joints. some kind of parasite living in my spine, and over a dozen different types of gout.
governments:
	professor i first made the acquaintance of young master malki ! when he came under my tutelage at oxford -- introduction to mad biochemistry, as i recall. frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. "malki !, my lad," i told him on more than one occasion, "if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then i fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world." but some boys just refuse to listen.
governor:
	bugle correction a statement in yesterday's bugle regarding gravity was found to be incorrect.  the bugle regrets the error.  correction tuesday's bugle incorrectly identified the governor of iowa as terry barnstad.  the correct spelling is branstad.
gown:
	a man in a tuxedo is holding a buxom woman in a low-cut gown; they are talking to davey, a skeleton.
graaaaahhh:
	<<graaaaahhh>>
graaaaaoooohhh:
	- graaaaaoooohhh
graaawwhh:
	piranhamoose  graaawwhh
graahaaaa:
	soldier graahaaaa
graarrr:
	- graarrr!
gracefully:
	our children will grow up native to the changed civilization to come.  they will escort us gracefully to the final death of all that we understand.
grades:
	nan study hard and get good grades!
grading:
	man1 i found that the whole registration, homework, grading paradigm wasn't really serving my personal learning needs. 
graduate:
	 in fact, he has his master's in catology and has done extensive post-graduate work at the cat institute in cattington but stopped short of getting his ph.d. due to an unfortunate catastrophe
graduates:
	instructor  at the walforth barber academy, our credentialed graduates coif kings, popes and emperor-pope-kings.
graffiti:
	gregg seeing that the word "poop" has been spraypainted on his house ah!  graffiti!
grafts:
	- finally! someone who'll look past the skin grafts to find her inner beauty. which i presume is there.
grah:
	gentle grah
grahmwragfgh:
	 oh please!  i couldn't possiblsnarf glarp nom nom blarg chomp chew charmp grahmwragfgh could we get some napkins over here?
grain:
	(2) carve the necessary implements from a piece of dry cordwood (fig. 1). always try the wood before cutting into it, to ascerta way the grain runs. in clear basswood it is usually quite straight, but sometimes it runs at a slight angle. 
grainy:
	ruth i know, but hating him seems so easy. he's a sneering beanpole on grainy videotapes with a watermelon-shaped beard! all he needs is a cackling ferret sidekick to be a mid-'90s disney villain!
grammar:
	i know i've been a grumpy grammar gus in the past, but i recently realized that the correction is often more annoying than the transgressions.
grams:
	husband "its first bowel movement yielded 400 grams of excretum, having the viscosity of warm butter."
grandaddy:
	--took off his grandaddy's very own plaid pants.  handed 'em right over to me.
granddaughter:
	morgan is looking through a camera as his granddaughter watches.
grande:
	darrell iced decaf grande raspberry soy no-whip light-ice mocha!
grandfathered:
	glen you were grandfathered in
grandmothers:
	rope "2. ordinary parcel twine can be used to tie saplings to posts, rather than some kind of special gardening twine. it's not like you're going to use it for parcels. the only people who still tie parcels with twine are grandmothers, and that's only because the mail clerks feel bad yelling at them to knock it off."
granting:
	- you there! have you seen my son go by? he's infected by a terrible virus that will kill one-third of the earth's population, making five-eights of those remaining lactose intolerant while granting amazing super-powers to a quarter of the remainder!
grapes:
	 and my colleagues who put used needles into bananas and depleted uranium into grapes aren't doing any better!!
graph:
	 they probably have some kind of graph with all of your moods
grateful:
	i am grateful for your wisdom.  you have done us both, and our cause, a great service today.
gratia:
	768768; brick gratia brickis
gratification:
	lois and isn't it good to exercise a healthy discipline of delayed gratification?  if in doubt, save it?  after all, you never know when you'll need that cheddar!  like you said - the world ends, and now you're king!  won't you be glad you showed restraint?
gravel:
	cameron little help?  whose bright idea was the gravel driveway
gravely:
	 "this is a serious issue!" she said, to which he responded, gravely and with full eye contact, "yes. very serious."
graves:
	lopez  our people lie merely asleep in their graves, waiting to shriek forth and bring agonizing death to any who would dare disturb their peace.
graze:
	are we talking mountain-vaulting altitudes or is it more a graze-the-steeples type of affair?
grease:
	734734; when elbow grease is toxic
greased:
	carla (to herself)  his pans aren't greased...there's forks in the microwave...the milk jug is in the oven...
greatness:
	seamus  i fear our relative bars for greatness rest at wildly different heights.
greek:
	a woman in an ancient greek battle helmet is weeping.
greenland:
	woman or like greenland, or st. louis, or paris. no one thinks about what the words mean anymore.
greenly:
	one sees the world slightly more greenly.  the other's a little more red!
greens:
	rhonda you listen close i make all the toys.  i give them out to boys and girls everywhere.  i watch 'em all closely to see who's eaten' their greens and who's actin' out.  me.  and i put in fifty hours a week at the windshield place.  that part you know about.  now you know why i'm so tired.  that settle it?  no more questions?
greeting:
	- and a greeting to you as well, chief!
greets:
	a man in a top hat holding a cane greets a secretary, next to a table stacked with books inside some sort of library.
griddle:
	simon, who will...  free-range hen eggs delicately cracked into a porcelain bowl, the yolk and albumen whipped until smooth with a silver whisk, then seared on a steaming griddle until golden and fluffy.
grief:
	- for too long has my people's voice gone unheard! for too long has the earth cried out with grief for the souls of my ancestors!
grieve:
	man 2 can we at least agree that his next of kin will grieve for him
grill:
	- medium rare, fresh off the grill.
grind:
	(1) prepare your whittling tools. a good sharp chisel is of first importance in this work. add to your kit an oilstone and strop. place a few drops of oil on the stone and grind your blade upon its coarse side, then strop to remove the burr.
grip:
	katie the big rallying cry for every election is 'change.'  end corruption!  free democracy from the crushing grip of special interests!
grisly:
	- or was, before its grisly murder.
gritted:
	man2 i gritted my teeth through napoleon dynamite. 
grizzlies:
	 grizzlies are notoriously ungracious
grog:
	bobby how we tied knots, and brewed grog, and divvied up the spoils of war...
groob:
	 groob
groom:
	 and now i can't use my idea about time-traveling cavemen who team up with a race of bird-humans to set up a sham wizard school in the american west in a plot to groom orphan boys to impersonate various missing and presumed dead heirs to massive fortunes around the world because somebody already did it better
grope:
	  here comes the grope monster!
grotesquely:
	chris' eyes bulge as his head is forced back painfully far.  his jaw is practically unhinged and his throat is swollen grotesquely.  a mass protrudes from his mouth, and atop the mass is a banner reading thanks.
groups:
	we see a closeup of a sheet covered in seemingly-random groups of letters and characters...
grouueeahhh:
	scotty you shoulda seen it.  i never saw a fish charge like that before.  and loud, too - all "grouueeahhh!" and "ffrooorrhaa!" and "rrahhhnn!"
growing:
	hap it looks like the flesh of my chest is ripped back and inside my body there is a tiny dinosaur working a series of levers to control me  down one arm there's an army of manatees mounting to stage a coup and take control of the me-throne  down the other arm is the rival army of dinosaurs but they are actually being driven by butterflies in hive-mind mode  climbing up my back there's like a silhouette of myself but it's as if i'm climbing the mountain of me to get my soul back from the dinosaur in my ribcage  and i'm being chased by this fast-growing fungus that is turning my body to mushrooms as it creeps up from my crack
growling:
	a little girl pulls back on her dog's leash.  the dog is growling at a large man.
grrrnnkkk:
	<<car grrrnnkkk>>
grrrr:
	soldier  grrrr
gruaah:
	- gruaah
grubby:
	calvin oh, i've searched for it for ages.  pored through dusty stacks to no avail.  searched every catalog i could get my grubby paws on?but where i failed, lad, you prevailed.  tell me!  how did you locate it?  on which remove bookshelf did you peep its flaking spine?
grudgingly:
	399399;  customers are served only grudgingly
gruesome:
	washington oh certainly, certainly. savage and gruesome deaths are very in these days you'd surely be the talk of the town for a few days after something like that.
guantanamo:
	the sign says "guantanamo."
guarding:
	a viking faces off against a soldier guarding a castle with a gatling gun
guards:
	- don't be. those guards are dumber than dirt.
guent:
	glen his myspace username "guent-to-the-choppa" also shows up on an old yu-gi-oh forum.  that isn't online anymore, but the internet archive has a cached version.
guenters:
	glen now i got the correct spelling of his name guenters kreiberscht.  googling that reveals an old myspace blog.
guessed:
	i think he woulda guessed it in two.
guffaws:
	130130;  a urologist guffaws
guh:
	fish face  guh bluh blrrbbuh
guhhhhh:
	stig guhhhhh i have to change my pants.
guilty:
	sheldon as as for being socially maladjusted - well, guilty.  but doesn't everyone have some sort of neurosis?  better a little shy than, say, obsessed with celebrity, or addicted to drugs, or running around murdering people with axes.  really, you talk about socially awkward virgins living in their moms' basements - you're talking about serial killers.
guinea:
	a man is pushing a baby carriage containing what appears to be a very large guinea pig
gulf:
	dawn too late!  we've moved on to the oil spill in the gulf of mexico!  it's so tragic it makes hamlet look like 3-2-1 contact!  it's the worst marine disaster since noah's flood!  everyone is very concerned!  brow-furrowing is at an all-time high!
gunshowcomic:
	  gunshowcomic.com 
guru:
	- please, o guru, my mother has been to every healer in the yellow pages. can you do anything?
gwendonly:
	gwendonly it doesn't matter.  i'd rather be left alone, thank you.
gyno:
	- as you can see, our portable device saves the patient the embarassment and awkwardness of the traditional stirrups and speculum. - i'll begin the exam by inserting a small amount of lubricating paste to help her open and allow light in. - gee! - nurse, please bring in a dose of gyno-paste. (my own formula.) - you may experience some slight discomfort. - hope you're not allergic to peanut butter.  get a clue at   modesty, chastity, virtue
habits:
	old ant what with your absurd musical taste, generically rebellious nature, and unfamiliar/threatening media-consumption habits 
hacked:
	482482;  hair is hacked at
hacksaw:
	- let me fetch my hacksaw of doom, and then we'll see who's crazy!
hadron:
	 if we can just get this crinkled mess into the large hadron collider we will never have to buy toothpaste again
hae:
	rob  ...and here we hae the lovely miss cindy and the, uh...
haggard:
	a haggard-looking man is sitting on what appears to be a bucket, back against a wall, bag at his feet.
hailed:
	 then, once you got on the bus, i hailed a cab and met you at the train station.
hailstorms:
	joanne and rather than park our cars tandem, i'm installing a hoist that will store the cars one atop the other.  long-term, i have plans to build a stadium-style rolling roof to protect our entire property from hailstorms.
hairier:
	ron do you think everyone has the same number of hair follicles?  on the face of it, you'd think of course not.  some people are way hairier than others.  but are they?  or is their hair just thicker and coarser?  even bald people have hair follicles, it's just that fewer of them are active.  i mean, why wouldn't we all have the same number of follicles?  we have the same number of fingers.  i know, i know - some people don't have the same number of fingers.  but that's abnormal.  but - jeez, maybe there's a high rate of abnormality with hair, too.   with so many follicles, the chances of minor mutation during development are very high.  meaning, even if there were some theoretical "ideal" number of follicles, chances are slim that anybody would match that number.  so if there were an ideal number, would we even know?
hairiest:
	choose your eight hairiest boys to pull a sleigh.  i shall play santa.
hairs:
	rub her down each evening with a mitt hand-knit from the hairs of her own mane?
haley:
	violet i can't go with you to the thing.  facebook just reminded me that saturday is haley's birthday party.
halliburton:
	harold plankton?  halliburton?  columbus day?  you gotta give me a little more to go on.
hallmark:
	leslie corporations tell girls to tell guys to spend money.  and girls giggle and do it.  they make guys feel like they have to jump through these stupid hallmark hoops, or else.   it's just sad.
halls:
	man1 with hundreds of people in those lecture halls, they don't mind one more dude in the back of the room.
hallucinogens:
	ed what with his crippling addiction to hallucinogens?
halt:
	guard  halt!  what's the password?
halted:
	683683;  a line of questioning is halted
hamilton:
	 oh that hamilton what a prankster
hamlet:
	dawn too late!  we've moved on to the oil spill in the gulf of mexico!  it's so tragic it makes hamlet look like 3-2-1 contact!  it's the worst marine disaster since noah's flood!  everyone is very concerned!  brow-furrowing is at an all-time high!
hamsters:
	walt breaking news.  tragedy strikes eastern europe as a trainload of irradiated hamsters derails in the former soviet republic of georgia.
handbook:
	another banner states "wondermark's" "nominally-essential" "tinkerer's handbook" "the magazine for people who cannot leave well enough alone". a woman is shown operating some sort of water pump.
handful:
	perry  frankly, managing to give a hundred percent would be miraculous, as i always reserve a handful of percents for basic personal use.
handfuls:
	desperation reeks from these walls.  this morning, you ate great handfuls of pretzels through thick veils of tears.  you will do the same tomorrow.
handicrafts:
	the mangler. should your handicrafts call for fresh bone marrow, this bench-mounted device will extract it speedily.  why pay more for store-bought?  fresh is unmatched for flavor.  $3.50
handkerchief:
	he offers her a handkerchief.
handkerchiefs:
	leonard we use handkerchiefs now, instead of kleenex.  and washable cotton rags instead of paper towels.
handles:
	todd well, i'm sorry.  you'll just have to take it up with my accountant. / she handles all of my financial matters.  i'm sure it's just a minor misunderstanding.
handshake:
	hatless strong handshake, insightful questions.
handwritten:
	handwritten sign on lamp post
hangin:
	george washington ...all i gotta do is just touch my arm - and a million skin cells fly off. a million of 'em! jus' hangin' in the air! probly breathin' 'em up. you ever think of that
hangover:
	- shhh... our hangover cure takes time to blossom.
hannibal:
	problems are designed to be solved. spring into action. make it happen. hannibal was right i love it when a plan comes together.
hannukah:
	hannukah bush!
hanson:
	happy hanson sorry, i didn't hear you the first time.
haplotype:
	 do you know your son's haplotype?
happier:
	 happier times at 
haraam:
	 to muslims, any artistic depiction of a living thing is haraam
harbinger:
	gaston  whereas i've been hung over every morning this year.  i hope this is no harbinger of the months to come!
harden:
	voicemail let the liquid harden into a gel in a cool cupboard  in seven to ten days, you will receive a packet of seeds.  plant the seeds in the gel in the shape of a regular heptagon.
hardened:
	newspaper text such are the benefits afforded us all by the unending march of progress, that each new dawn finds many a person safe, fed, clothed and sheltered. a citizen of our modern era rarely finds him- or herself in a deadly battle for survival, as was common for the first generations of mankind. thus do our bodies, evolved for and hardened by constant struggle, often find themselves idle; and without some constant whetting, thus swiftly begins the degenerative process of death.
hardscrabble:
	- that night we o.d.'ed was magical, but i'm afraid i'm simply not made for this hardscrabble life. goodbye, gene; it's over.
hardworking:
	lawyer would you be interested in participating in a class action? to punish the zipper company for is cavalier pursuit of never-ending profits at the expense of ordinary, hardworking, zipper-reliant citizens like yourself?
hark:
	tiny   hark!  i bring you dire news of betrayal!
harken:
	harken to my words, ye servants of the most high, and ye freelancers too
harlequin:
	norm confronts a typewriter which happens to be the head of a harlequin dancer
harmed:
	 no lobsters were harmed at 
harmless:
	marc which seemingly harmless substance that we use every day is actually slowly poisoning us?  lead.  asbestos.  teflon.  thalomide.  vioxx.  makes you wonder what's next.  what they haven't figured out is deadly yet.  so i'm just playing it safe.
harp:
	now an old man, the fellow strums a harp piningly.  two children look on.
harping:
	rodney man, i hate these unreal expectations in music!  everyone's always harping on you to hit every single note.  nobody's perfect, yo!  batting .400 in baseball gets you into the hall of fame.  but for some reason i just get yelled at!
harps:
	 and this is by sitting-around-on-clouds-strumming-harps standards
harriet:
	harriet  the constant appeals to fear and ignorance!
harsh:
	cap'n pegwood don't be so harsh on the ol' folks, bobby! they still got wallets you kin steal from, ain't they?
harv:
	451451;  harv finally succeeds
harvested:
	wally we were also out of eggs, so i harvested some of yours.
harvesting:
	a bulb "7. now that you're 'going green' and harvesting your earwax to make  biodiesel, you won't need this ear-cleaning bulb anymore. plant it and see if it grows. it's not a dumber idea than staying in this marriage."
harvey:
	265265;  harvey is a hater
hashanah:
	i mean, happy jewish new year!  it's rosh hashanah.
hassle:
	we still take time as a family to exchange gifts and commemorate the birth of christ,  but we do it free of media nonsense and logistical hassle.
hast:
	for any intern thou hast raped, thou must forfeit one sick day.
haste:
	114114;  haste is encouraged
hastily:
	the strip consists of three photos of people hastily cut from a magazine and stapled to a sheet of paper. boxes, text, and speech bubbles are drawn in sloppily by hand
hasty:
	052052;  a hasty union is reconsidered
hatched:
	318318  a scheme is hatched
hater:
	265265;  harvey is a hater
hatin:
	white  why you gotta be hatin' on a man's hobbies?
hauled:
	@jenny hauled into custody.  they'll never get me to talk #downtownriots
haunt:
	766/ [wondermark ? archive ? #766;  spirits haunt an auto
havvah:
	- ahyah gannah havvah obbawayt?
hawaiian:
	jen my fiancè, or in some accounts my husband, didn't die.  there was a guy who died, but he wasn't my husband.  we weren't wed in a secret hawaiian ceremony.  he was just a dude i was stalking.  it was this whole big thing.  but anyway.  
hawt:
	(translation hawt)
hayes:
	if obama wins, it'll probably be historic for reasons other than his being the fourteenth (after carter, nixon, jefferson, cleveland, both johnsons, tyler, hayes, jackson, madison, grant, wilson and arguably taylor) to feature palindromic vowel-consonant dispersion.
hayloft:
	 barnyard chancellor is primarily a ceremonial position anyway. the viscount of the hayloft has all the real power.
hazard:
	chet  ooh, that's a health hazard.  wet cloth will mildew pretty quick.
heaaaadbuuutts:
	agnes i am trying to do something too and it is heaaaadbuuutts
heaaadbuutts:
	agnes heaaadbuutts
headin:
	alttext you know what? headin' back to the store to get ten more tubas. just to show who's boss
headphones:
	smiling giddily, he listens to morse code on headphones.
headshot:
	you're still sending out my headshot for dramatic roles, right?  i mean, i came out here to be a serious actor.
heal:
	  heal 
healer:
	- please, o guru, my mother has been to every healer in the yellow pages. can you do anything?
healing:
	you're beginning the healing process without him?
heap:
	farmer  ah hah! i knew there was some shenanigans goin' on back here!  you two lovebirds are in a heap o'trouble!
heartbeat:
	annie just barely.  scratching a little or - i don't know.  could be your footsteps echoing.  could be water dripping.  could be my heartbeat.  he may have returned to hades.
heartfelt:
	- my stars! please accept my heartfelt apologies!
hearth:
	- your eyes are sparks that jump and snap in the hearth of my heart... i take your musk with me into the cold and it nourishes me. (turn the page)
hearts:
	well groomed  i have some little clovers and a bunch of upside-down hearts with tails.
heat:
	man 2 they're inventing new forms of life so somebody will be able to properly experience the incendiary fullness of this heat.
heater:
	"2. once your box is cut to size and sealed (as necessary), place your old project materials in the box. create dividers if desired. we recommend putting the oldest projects nearest the bottom to create a sort of strata of failure. that way you will not be too discouraged when you open the box; you will only see the birdhouse you failed to finish last week, rather than the solar-powered water-heater you discovered was way over your head three and a half years ago.*" "*for example."
heathcliff:
	- why does heathcliff need a bookie?
heathen:
	for zion, o heathen, is where i deprive myself of every human comfort to more fully understand the deep mysteries of kabbalah.
hebephile:
	 <<sigh>> i'm getting tired of having to explain this every time. a pedophile is attracted to pre-pubescent children. (eww.) i'm a hebephile. i'm attracted to adolescents. there is a significant difference.
hedgehog:
	raymond is telling this story to a hedgehog (i think).  his head is stuck in the tuba.
hedonist:
	 this is a very elaborate hedonist construct you've gone to simply to disclaim personal responsibility for being late.
heebophile:
	wo wait, heebophile? i would think that meant you were attracted to jews.
heeded:
	chester  thank heavens our shrill, insistent warnings were heeded!
heel:
	inventor friction-recapturing inner flywheel. water-resistant to 18 meters. sixty-seven individual servomotors. bluetooth built into the heel.
heinies:
	  um, only the commissioner of butts, heinies and derrieres?
heinous:
	king so the criminal even admits his heinous offense!
heirloom:
	020020;  an heirloom is coveted
heirs:
	 and now i can't use my idea about time-traveling cavemen who team up with a race of bird-humans to set up a sham wizard school in the american west in a plot to groom orphan boys to impersonate various missing and presumed dead heirs to massive fortunes around the world because somebody already did it better
hel:
	harold for example, yesterday a guy asked why there's a surcharge for pickups from the airport.  hel-looo!   municipal regulations have stipulated that surcharge ever since it passed the city assembly!  it's completely detailed in the cab company's contract with the airport authority!
helena:
	helena left it on the train yesterday.
helicopters:
	 competing theory wistful trailers will take any excuse to pretend to be helicopters 
hellooo:
	- hey! little help, here! hellooo!
helmets:
	 not pictured wwi-era german officers in pointy helmets, fakirs, stripes-wearing prisoners complete with shackles and iron balls, larry flynt
helper:
	- gangrene took my fingers... i hope your health care can pay for a helper monkey!
helplessly:
	down on the shore, passers-by gawk and point at the sight of pat and his glider helplessly entangled in the power and phone lines.
helps:
	frans kissing her hand this is good.  this helps me. 
hemisphere:
	jason  we used to have only one telephone per household, not per cerebral hemisphere!
hems:
	grandfather  but declaring a religion hems you into declaring beliefs.  and it's much easier to just leave that door open by claiming to be 'spiritual'.  the free pass that affords for your smug little know-it-all libido is just gravy.  
hen:
	simon, who will...  free-range hen eggs delicately cracked into a porcelain bowl, the yolk and albumen whipped until smooth with a silver whisk, then seared on a steaming griddle until golden and fluffy.
hepatitis:
	- you also gave me hepatitis c.
heptagon:
	voicemail let the liquid harden into a gel in a cool cupboard  in seven to ten days, you will receive a packet of seeds.  plant the seeds in the gel in the shape of a regular heptagon.
herald:
	front page of the masthead herald, many years later.
heralds:
	343343;  the holiday heralds dissent
herd:
	  yo dawg i herd you like sprockets so i put sprockets in your sprockets so you can sprocket while you sprocket
hereby:
	- as punishment for showing grown-ups ugly pictures of naked diseased people, i hereby shove this rusty nail into your arm.
heresy:
	  the problems arise when oversimplified concepts evolve into common knowledge.  then the complicated version--the more accurate version--starts sounding to the public like heresy!
heretics:
	student those turncoat heretics are all gonna burn in baja someday. says so in scripture.
heritage:
	- "i have hated esau; i have made his hill country a desolation, and his heritage a deset for jackals."
hernia:
	what a crazy year it's been!  at ace we've had some real challenges.  bill, our muffler expert, suffered a hernia while lifting a catalytic converter--right during our busy "may is for mufflers" promotion!  but we still managed to set a sales record that big al...(cut off)...will be proud of.  our office...
heroes:
	bart fine, new idea - we dress like bank robbers and the minister is the flustered bank manager.  the attendees all have to like on the floor and be very quiet no heroes
heroism:
	jamaal  come on!  the heroism!  the sweeping vistas!  the unironic presentation of cut-and-dried morality!
heterozygous:
	 genetic inheritance! a tricky subject! the transmission disequillibrium test is one way to measure the over-transmission of an allele from heterozygous parents to affected offspring!
hewn:
	 the legends come down to us in yellowed fur-trappers'  journals...in shaky rough-hewn script, scrawled by fading candlelight, a single penciled word 'awesome.'
hexed:
	 i also have a bewitched nose and a hexed earlobe.  at my age you just sort of acquire these things.
hiding:
	plain view.  no hiding that'un.
higgledy:
	leprechaun hi de higgledy, ho de piggledy, hi-dilly ho-dilly hi-dilly ho
highest:
	malki ! behind the scenes here at wondermark, we work to ensure that only the highest quality product reaches your homes and offices.
highness:
	wendy are you done being a souvenir grump?  can i look around now, your highness?
highs:
	ole so where's all the oil?  why are gas prices at record highs?   shouldn't poined iraqi oil be flooding the u.s. market?
hijacked:
	top hat  but the whole point of detournement, from a strict situationist perspective, is to divert bourgeois cultural elements to new subversive roles! the spectacle's great recuperative powers are hijacked to instead serve as a vehicle for revolutionary communique!
hildy:
	- since you asked, i've been cast in the jackson high school production of "swan lake 2 the return of durant!" they said i was perfect for "hildy."
hillside:
	a majestic forest.  the goofy elk stands proud on a hillside.
hillyer:
	the wonderful pen-holder! no ink required. no pen, either, really - you can put anything you want in here. it just sits on your desk. maybe a miniature american flag? that'd fit nicely. or, put a pen on in. that's fine. j. t. hillyer, 306 broadway, n.y. henry ward writes "it is all it claims to be. a pen-holder, it is; wonderful, i suppose as well. i mean, it's not like standards are terribly high for a pen-holder. the pen does not fall out regularly."
hindquarters:
	mandy and her father see what appears to be a puppy's hindquarters sticking out from behind a fence.
hinged:
	"3. our simple pattern for the box (left) includes hinged walls held in shape with cotter pins. this way, should you fail to complete construction of the box itself, you may simply remove the pins and place the loose pieces within the general shape of the half-formed box. this recursiveness cuts down on waste."
hinted:
	076076;  deeper issues are only hinted at
hinting:
	- whoa, whoa, hold your horses there, buddy.  our kids? / like, offspring resulting from some hypothetical union of you and me?  i don't know what sort of abnormal philandering you're hinting at, but leave me and my chromosomes out of your sick plans, okay?
hippie:
	digger but, seasons change, circle of life, all that hippie junk. this shallow grave's not going to dig itself, so if you'll excuse me.
hippopotamus:
	a small mammoth  father o'malley!  is it a sin to look with lust upon a hippopotamus even if she's not totally what you might call a compatible--
hippos:
	a stereoscopic image gus, atop his giant eagle glenda, attempts to lasso the piggybacked and gargantuan anthropomorphized hippos anton and jay.  mount banjo erupts  dramatically in the background.
hips:
	a woman, hands at her hips and smiling, is examining her reflection in a mirror
hipster:
	 that sounds retarded.  seriously, that sounds like shallow, "web 2.0" overblogged crap making one company rich of the backs of a bunch of wannabe-hipster suckers.
hipsters:
	gustave well it's happening again.  except with hipsters.
hiram:
	hiram  let her keep her victory
hire:
	will you hire only the best equestrian-pilates trainers?  and will you do the exercises with her so she doesn't get self-conscious?  despite the fact that they are designed for a horse's body, not a man's?
hiring:
	chris years from now you'll pinpoint this morning that you overslept as the exact moment your fortunes take a turn for the worse.   so you'll send a message back in time, hiring me to make sure you get up!
hiroshi:
	171171;  hiroshi misses the point
hiss:
	 through the quiet crackle of cooling embers she thought she almost heard him weeping. but it was probably just a faint hiss of steam, or else the wind, or else the sorrowful ghosts of her long year full of many purposeful misdeeds
hissss:
	strawberry  hissss
historically:
	 historically this has been less than effective
hitch:
	 hitch a ride 
hitler:
	marcus mo-om!  he called me names on a messageboard!  he compared me to hitler!  i've spent all morning composing my scathing reply
hitter:
	john and doesn't having fielders convey a lack of confidence in the pitcher?  "we really don't think you can throw a no-hitter, so we put eight other guys out there to clean up your messes."  "don't try hard or anything."  oh and hey, what if the pitcher started using a tennis ball?  just like whipped it out?  you think anyone'd notice?
hitz:
	 in fact i married her largely because she has never listened to 96.9 hitz-fm
hive:
	hap it looks like the flesh of my chest is ripped back and inside my body there is a tiny dinosaur working a series of levers to control me  down one arm there's an army of manatees mounting to stage a coup and take control of the me-throne  down the other arm is the rival army of dinosaurs but they are actually being driven by butterflies in hive-mind mode  climbing up my back there's like a silhouette of myself but it's as if i'm climbing the mountain of me to get my soul back from the dinosaur in my ribcage  and i'm being chased by this fast-growing fungus that is turning my body to mushrooms as it creeps up from my crack
hmmh:
	britnee hmmh.  whatever would you do if the internet were to disappear?
hmmmm:
	millionaire  hmmmm
hmmmph:
	angry  hmmmph!
hmpf:
	nabil leaving hmpf!
hmph:
	pablo storming off hmph!
hnjyvrnglz:
	scotty "gnxbinrff!  hnjyvrnglz!  krvngblarwx!  pkiznvvq!"
hoakes:
	 you should hear how he went on when he met the new mailroom guy, abernathy mercutio hoakes-waddleswourthe iv
hoard:
	 hoard 
hoarding:
	barbara ain't no such animal in life.  dragon's an easy villain.  all hoarding gold an' breathing flames-like.  strength of a lion with motives of a man.  no such beast in creation!
hobbyist:
	octavio like playing video games?  for every hour you play, some korean kid plays five.  name any sport you like.  some dweeb-o's been at it all day every day since he could walk.  and forget about creative media.  in this day and age, not even the most avid hobbyist can compete with "pirated software and zero social life."
hogaaaaan:
	 little kernel buried in there shaking his tiny fist just yelling 'hogaaaaan'
hogblotter:
	speaker hogblotter very well, let it be law.  any place with two or more persons gathered must blare christmas music incessantly for the entire month of december.
hogs:
	bruce she was an exiled princess on the run from the belgian royal guard?she hid in the bar with the hogs and was killed by the captain, who had once loved her but was bound by his duty?
hoist:
	joanne and rather than park our cars tandem, i'm installing a hoist that will store the cars one atop the other.  long-term, i have plans to build a stadium-style rolling roof to protect our entire property from hailstorms.
holes:
	the hollow top half of a ball "3. instead of discarding the half-balls left over from a game of slice-the-ball-in-the-garden, use them to cap off leaky sprinklers or plug gopher holes. the rubber balls are biodegradable, given a long enough timeline."
holiness:
	- you know, your holiness, you could get in a lot of trouble for looking at pictures like that.
holistic:
	 holistic medicine is really pretty lame
hollowing:
	chuck  a long life of what?  diabetes?  wasting away to nothing as modern medicine pumps morphine into an ever-hollowing shell of what once was my life?
homebirth:
	maggie so...in twenty years the chinese business world will be flooded with these kids!  if we want to stay one step ahead, we have to get billy in good stead for the next big powerhouse.  brazil. / john "one step ahead?"  you mean, if we want to one-up millie spangler. / maggie she's beat us on homebirth.  she's beat us on preschool.  john.  this is our only chance.
homelands:
	clive the premise of the ancestral diet is to eat foods native to the homelands of your ancestors.
homeless:
	3. on a dare, i once broke a window of a police car with my forehead, then blamed it on a homeless guy passed out in a gutter nearby and was awarded a medal.
homelessness:
	mindy a couple of bucks won't solve anything.  you'll just spend it on booze, right?  so you can blot out the reality of your sorry existence?  the only real solution to the problem of homelessness involves counseling coupled with mental health therapy and free, comprehensive addiction treatment when needed.
homeowners:
	norm i know just who to ask!  meet the new chairman of our homeowners' association!
hometowns:
	{[ front page newspapers in my hometowns hero local desires victory, pockets
homogenized:
	tall  instead of homogenized crap, listen to this indie track from my non-ipod mp3 player.
honesty:
	no mention of honesty or charity.  morality is simply a tactic to avoid santa's wrath!
honeycomb:
	closeup bees dance on a honeycomb.
honeydew:
	first  so he brings it out and it's cantaloupe this, and honeydew that...
honing:
	malki ! our scientists and technicians toil 'round the clock, honing the anachronisms and incongruities that have become synonymous with "wondermark."
honked:
	frans (a.k.a. poor baby) oh, it was terrible!  i was walking home from work, and a car honked, so i turned to look...
honored:
	055055;  a demand may yet be honored
honors:
	530530; sylvia honors the aforementioned
honus:
	 in fact the only thing appreciating at all around here is this honus wagner baseball card *rip to shreds*
hoo:
	mr. kabob  blah blah blah boo-hoo crybaby wants everything for nothing.  you know how expensive it is to rent a retail stall at a major airport?  if we charged street prices we'd be broke in a week.
hooker:
	otto redeeming it.  [to dave]  ah, yes.  looks like these dollars in your account were once used for a hooker binge on a ceo's yacht.  right now i have einstein's patent office wages for a 15% commission - or jfk's pulitzer prize winnings for twenty.
hooks:
	fetch the corpse-hooks!
hooligans:
	lincoln i say, old chap, i think the most undignified way to die would be to be robbed and murdered by lower-class hooligans.
hoop:
	a mustachioed gentleman readies to strike a barrel-chested chap in the groin with a 5-iron.  behind the barrel-chested chap, a young boy stands with a hoop ready to catch whatever might fly off.
hoops:
	leslie corporations tell girls to tell guys to spend money.  and girls giggle and do it.  they make guys feel like they have to jump through these stupid hallmark hoops, or else.   it's just sad.
hoover:
	boss hoover dan, i need you to work late tonight.  we've got to get this project sent out first thing tomorrow.
hooves:
	he took my magic skateboard, but he can't fly it with those hooves!  this surely spells chaos!  i'd find cover, if i were you.
hopelessly:
	- i realized today that people i used to consider `old' are the exact age i am now.  people i used to consider `my age' now look hopelessly young to me.
hoppily:
	739739; hoppily ever after
hopping:
	unnoticed by bill is a one-legged man, hopping frantically from the same direction jake came.
hoppity:
	reginald  you know!  sproing sproing hoppity-hop!  can the camel pogo!
horizon:
	dan come in, space command?yes, i'll make another orbit.  heading across the lunar horizon now.
horridness:
	santa santa is very concerned with your cellulose intake!  it's how he tracks you!  i've also brought some pickled marzipan!  its horridness will stimulate your bile ducts and make you smell less appetizing to the stingroaches i have also brought you.  you should start taking their venom in small doses now, while you are still larval.  be cautious!  they are not tame.
horsepower:
	 140 horsepower, steam powered, 85 decibels idling - like all the best marital aids
horshack:
	mikey i'm serious, folks.  i know who lives, who dies, who's something called a horshack.
hoses:
	floyd the problem wasn't bugs the problem was water getting into the suit. i just needed new fittings, is all. and sealant. and better hoses. i'm all set now!
hostess:
	 hostess is the michael bay of cupcakes.
hosts:
	god almighty, the lord of hosts, the king of kings, speaks to a room full of office workers.
hotels:
	pablo do you know who i am?  i am pablo!  i have shot covers for elle and cosmo and portuguese vogue!  i am paid ten thousand dollars for a single perfect photograph!  my work fills the finest galleries, the most luxurious hotels, the homes and summer homes and yachts and summer yachts of the world's elite!  and you want me to take a tourist snapshot?  of you?
hotperlative:
	man 1 hotperlative.
hotties:
	man 1 hotter than two hotties in a hot tub.
hottttt:
	man 1 hottttt with five t's.
hourakk:
	- hourakk
housemaid:
	i mean, don't get me wrong, it's a lot of work for our housemaid gabriella.
housing:
	in this housing market!
hovel:
	taken ten long years of scrimpin' and savin', but i finally own the old hovel free and clear.
hover:
	dylan  you just don't want to listen to him ooh and aah over the hover-toaster all day long.
hovering:
	wilbur (hovering nearby on his pedal-driven personal helicopter)  geez, i probably do not even want to get involved.
hovers:
	mike lowers a claw from the helicopter as he hovers above the parked car.
howdy:
	jennifer  i thought your parents tried to raise you on howdy doody and bosco drink.
howled:
	 i found you in a field. little shivering ball of fur. raised you, fed you, kept you warm at night. you doubled in size every year. ate nothing but hair. howled on federal holidays. always smelled like a wet anthill. this is somewhat less than ideal
howling:
	 start howling 
howls:
	and then she howls as i kick in my bed.
hozzentozzical:
	man 1 hozzentozzical.
hp:
	ed hp-7 is old news to us.
hrrm:
	- hrrm?
hrrrr:
	lucille (a dog) hrrrr hrrr
hsshhpp:
	- hsshhpp
hubris:
	o what a tragic fate!  is this your passive-aggressive way of cautioning me against the dangers of hubris?
huddle:
	dodos form a huddle
huddled:
	george  when i left, uncle bob was decorating the tree.  when i came back, he was huddled in a ball mumbling "what else don't i know, what else don't i know."
hug:
	frans i need hugs my hug meter is so low looooove meeeeee
hugely:
	chad  hugely.  these things are part of my childhood, you know?  part of my makeup.
hugging:
	phil i'm telling you.  it's better than winning an ice cream nobel prize.  better than a runner's high brought on by hugging your mom.  it's better than everything.
hugh:
	hugh sell it are you strange
hugs:
	frans i need hugs my hug meter is so low looooove meeeeee
humanitarian:
	later maggie millie!  how are you?  how's the baby? / millie just wonderful!  we've been teaching him lingala, so he'll be uniquely qualified to do humanitarian work in the congo. / maggie but... / millie check and mate
humanizing:
	fur collar  the recontextualization of not just disposable but disposed of victorian imagery in the milieu of 21st century web-based publication and distribution is a baldly ironic statement of luddite intransigence, but with a humanizing layer of nostalgia and longing for vanished standards of craftsmanship and civility
humbert:
	tad  ...and this is the psychic strawberry of humbert village.
humble:
	i like this place.  humble.  not a lot wasted on decor.
humid:
	man 2 little humid.
humorous:
	alien girl whatcha doin, honey? / nerd hu oh, just taking some old art i found and recontextualizing it into humorous comic strips.  take a look!
humpin:
	but he got his!  four and a half hours o' night-vision video of him stayin' after hours an' humpin' the welding robots!
humpville:
	stu if i wanted to throw in with a theory i think i'd head to humpville all the way.
humvee:
	- perhaps. that reminds me. i've evicted your family and bulldozed your house to build a car wash that'll fit my humvee.
hunched:
	a man is hunched over, reading a book with much concentration
hunted:
	older  and for an instant, you're transported back to a different time, a more feral time, when man hunted his food and life was short...
hunter:
	636636;  a hunter goes fishing
hunts:
	sigrid egg hunts aren't any fun when you don't end up with any eggs.  it makes for a pretty lousy easter.
hurk:
	gentle hurk
hurtful:
	davy i am immunes to every hurtful psychologies!
husbandry:
	"directions. 1. if the box you have obtained is larger than the prescribed size, cut it down to size. we have done extensive testing and our size is unequivocally the best. if your box needs to be watertight (say, if some of your unfinished projects involve plumbing, rainwater reclamation, or crab-husbandry) be sure to seal the new seams you are creating with plumber's goop. also take care to cut straight so that your seams will join smoothly. really 80% of this project is getting the seams right. the rest is just putting stuff in a box."
hush:
	otto all our money has a history.  bribes paid to politicians...hush money paid to victims...drugs and even human beings bought and sold...that money makes its way into our banks.  it carries negativity with it.  someone's starting a business, or buying toys for their baby?  they don't want iran-contra money.  they want nice money.  money with positive energy.
hushed:
	a legionnaire speaks in hushed tones with a tiny triceratops, perched on his bayonet.  in the background, a battle rages.
hustling:
	glen i need a way to become rich that doesn't involve hustling suckers and idiots.
huts:
	three men sit around a folding table in the middle of a village of thatched huts.
hy:
	hy  two fiddy.
hydrocephalic:
	the electro-plasmic hydrocephalic genre-fiction generator 2000
hygiene:
	012012;  dental hygiene plays a role
hyperallergic:
	chuck  but everything today is so aberrant.  our food has no nutrition.  our kids are hyperallergic.  everyone's on psychiatric drugs.
hyperbole:
	lucius  next wisecrack about my hyperbole gets your teeth kicked in.
hyperbolic:
	prudence  the hyperbolic demonization of the opposition!
hyperreal:
	bart you know, i got to thinking?there's something hyperreal about an obsessively-photographed event.
hypervigilance:
	our paranoia-inducing hypervigilance has once again saved a generation of children from certain harm.
hysteria:
	guy and women are at great risk for breast cancer, osteoporosis, and hysteria.
hysterical:
	 hysterical action  
iago:
	iago you mean like how some people love doing home repair?   or cooking?
icareq:
	 icarus + equus = icareq
icarus:
	 icarus + equus = icareq
icicle:
	rascal 1 i thought i saw one last goodbye trembling in his icicle eyes...
idealism:
	monsarto no no please i renounce my idealism
idealistic:
	a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild ocd, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert
idealized:
	woman girls aren't always comfortable in the role of idealized object.  even girls fart.
identity:
	but instead, a chorus of encouragement from other lunatics strokes his quirk into an obsession that takes over his identity!
idi:
	- how about genghis khan swanson.  idi amin swanson.  james k. polk swanson.  rudolf diesel swanson.
idiom:
	right are you talking about real radishes and an actual dog creamery or is this all  some kind of weird folksy idiom?
idling:
	 140 horsepower, steam powered, 85 decibels idling - like all the best marital aids
ified:
	rect-ified?
ight:
	that's a'ight.
ignited:
	calvin this was my first book as a boy - filled with vivid descriptions of the workings of the world around us - this is the book that ignited my passion for learning!  for scholarship!  for a lifelong journey of self - and other - discovery!
ignored:
	4. ever since i saw "the neverending story,"  i've felt that if ever i am  truly needed, i will hear a book calling out to me.  it's happened twice and i've ignored it both times.
ignoring:
	skippy is balancing a barrel on his nose.  seamus is ignoring him.
ihssit:
	- sah hah bahd ihssit, theh, dahc?
ii:
	fat  the japanese in world war ii were determined to fight to the very last man.  that was their battle plan!  took a couple of bombs, but we changed their minds.  i think these iraqis don't have half the resolve we think they do.
il:
	wo oh, geez...i could spell it out, and you'd probably follow it fine up through kim jong-il breakdancing, but then there's a cognitive leap to "jellyfish sandwiches" that would take all freakin' night to explain.
ilk:
	682682; monkey box and its ilk
illegally:
	ambrose so you plan out where you're going to illegally park and print fake citations ahead of time?  or do you just print a dozen citations every morning for whatever times you think you might need?
illegible:
	another picture shows some sort of box, circular diagrams, illegible writing, and what looks like a gear inside a pizza.
illness:
	sick  i was torn into by an illness left over from the plagues of egypt.
illnesses:
	woman trying to find what contributes to illnesses.
illufstrated:
	 copy-right 1781 ; lavishly illufstrated
illustrates:
	- this story illustrates exactly how i feel!
illustration:
	 tooth magazine folded in '89 when advertisers withdrew their support following the publishing of a controversial illustration featuring c. everett koop driving a bulldozer through tianenmen square. the caption 'fluoride uber alles'
imagery:
	fur collar  the recontextualization of not just disposable but disposed of victorian imagery in the milieu of 21st century web-based publication and distribution is a baldly ironic statement of luddite intransigence, but with a humanizing layer of nostalgia and longing for vanished standards of craftsmanship and civility
imbibe:
	 imbibe 
imitations:
	a kind of poncho is shown. gossamer waterproof garments. get the genuine! beware of worthless imitations! rival garments are made of acid-treated poison cloth. ours are safe and nurturing to your babylike skin. don't you deserve not to have your skin corroded off by the competition? masochists need not respond. we don't want your business. this is a nice place. gossamer clothing co, 28 devonshire st., boston, ma.
immeasurably:
	 you see- the elementary nuances of our physical makeup are immeasurably minuscule squares which are called--
immensely:
	nathan is immensely obese.
immigrants:
	i've fired anyone with a pension and hired a bunch of low-wage immigrants...
immortal:
	 i felt a chill as the ghost swept through me to alight on the distributor cap.  "there is corrosion," it hissed in a voice blasted for centuries by the immortal furnaces of hades, "on the spark plug wire contacts."
immortalized:
	clara i wonder if i will be immortalized as a heroine in one of his magical tales of the fantastic!  a princess slaying a deadly dragon to save her people from mass devouring!
immunes:
	davy i am immunes to every hurtful psychologies!
impaired:
	man2 but i don't want to spend the next twelve to eighteen months suffering through your impaired version of borat.
impaled:
	edward stands outside the gate to a pasture, shaking his fist impotently at a bull who has his hat impaled on one horn.
impartial:
	dad  "i know this sounds bad.  i know i've been wrong before.  but right now, the danger we face is so great that i ask you to look past me to the facts of the situation, as presented by an impartial third party.
imparts:
	robot shaver.  children and animals are not allowed in most robot competitions.  hide your treachery with this shaver - removes hair and imparts a waxy, metallic sheen.  $2.00
impassable:
	carlos our nations are kept distinct by means of impassable canyons, policed by savage animals who devour trespassers.
impasse:
	527527;  an impasse is reached
impassioned:
	diane one week ago you were exactly as impassioned about exactly the opposite.
impenetrable:
	 impenetrable night at 
imperatives:
	nabil meanwhile i have severe biological imperatives to contend with.  i don't have the luxury of having everything below "car" on the hierarchy of needs taken care of.  i'm hungry.  i'm cold.  i'm tired.  i have to go to the bathroom.  please, allow me to address my body's needs before i help with your ego's.
imperial:
	 there are no prizes for being a decent person.  there are, however, several for eating cakes of butter, or choking down an imperial quart of milk in 3.2 seconds (1978 record)
imperialism:
	 also they have installed moles at the x-ray machines who foil imperialism by working reeeeally slowly
imperialists:
	excited terrorist it's not about how many dozens of imperialists we can kill...  it's about how many millions we can inconvenience at airports for decades to come.
impersonate:
	 and now i can't use my idea about time-traveling cavemen who team up with a race of bird-humans to set up a sham wizard school in the american west in a plot to groom orphan boys to impersonate various missing and presumed dead heirs to massive fortunes around the world because somebody already did it better
impertinent:
	305305;  jed is asked an impertinent question
implanted:
	martha  isn't it weird how car-dealership jingles are implanted more firmly than pretty much anything else we learned as a child?
implants:
	- uh-oh, here comes martha. don't mention her new implants.
implement:
	sima is this one of those schemes that takes more trouble to implement than the thing you're trying to avoid doing?
implies:
	of a sailboat "1. model sailboat can be used to repel aphids from plants. aphids have a jungian aversion to open water, and the presence of the boat implies a nearby regatta."
impolite:
	- i didn't realize asking about the seafood was impolite.
imported:
	foster  will you hand-mash her special imported oatmeal?
imposter:
	644644; the nocturnal imposter
imposters:
	recipient well, one is a regular card...but the other says, 'we are the only true taylors all others are space alien imposters.' in a font that looks like...blood drips?
impotence:
	winston is the narrator fed up with the subject's behavior?  if so, the whole song's an admission of impotence.
impotently:
	edward stands outside the gate to a pasture, shaking his fist impotently at a bull who has his hat impaled on one horn.
impress:
	560560;  a diversion fails to impress
impressed:
	591591;  shauna is impressed
improved:
	555555;  a tool is improved
improvement:
	radislov i hear you've been ragging on people who have the audacity to sell self-improvement products!
impudence:
	woman silence!  this tribunal will not hear impudence!
impudent:
	gaxian hey, you want to know the number one cause of death for impudent earthlings? me
impulsive:
	it was impulsive
inaccuracy:
	 this tale smacks of historical inaccuracy
inadvertently:
	104104;  a slight is inadvertently made
inanimate:
	- i just don't care to have an inanimate object tell me what to think.
inappropriate:
	very affectionate, totally inappropriate for the workplace.  he always wants to sit on my lap while i work!  i should really file a formal complaint with h.r.!
inasmuch:
	reginald yeah!  how about "i have inasmuch as the sign, and same i am opened on my eyes..."
inc:
	nora what?  did you spill it?  did you burn your central intelligence agency?  should we be expecting some sort of cash payout from yum! brands, inc.?
incantations:
	- and what if someone overhears your secret magic incantations?
incense:
	sylvia  maybe it's packed with an incense he picked up somewhere on his travels.
inching:
	 inching ever closer and then wham smacked with a spyglass and eaten
incinerated:
	gax to an incinerated, and annoyed, rob i did not specify what kind of luck.
incinerates:
	the two-day-old dinosaur toy erupts in a ball of flame, which unfortunately incinerates kate and her daughter as well.
incl:
	(incl. tail) plus 4326011
inclusia:
	stan an antelope-headed man bearing a large sack on his back, and wearing a dress kind villager!  is this the fabled town of inclusia?  where all are welcomed and respected, no matter what?
incompatible:
	hugo but whenever some external force, such as the state, commands us under penalty to to do or not do certain things - isn't that negating our personal choice to do or not do that thing?  in other words, removing our free will.  and isn't free will and moral agency the defining characteristic of humanity?  thus, i must reject any "law" that prescribes my actions as incompatible with my very nature as a reasoning being!
incompetent:
	man #2 not the incompetent moron who once plugged an overflowing toilet with a live squirrel?
incongruities:
	malki ! our scientists and technicians toil 'round the clock, honing the anachronisms and incongruities that have become synonymous with "wondermark."
inconvenient:
	 look, i got problems too! this settlement has pushed me into a very inconvenient tax bracket!
incorrectly:
	bugle correction a statement in yesterday's bugle regarding gravity was found to be incorrect.  the bugle regrets the error.  correction tuesday's bugle incorrectly identified the governor of iowa as terry barnstad.  the correct spelling is branstad.
increase:
	the chart is titled packaged candy sales and shows a sharp increase for the month of october.
increased:
	 i guess this would explain my increased tendency to shout at the television
increases:
	lois actually, philosophers call that the oenophile's quandary!  presented with something that, over time, increases in quality (like wine) or in value (like money in a savings account), when's the right time to use it?  if you're saving for a rainy day, how hard does it have to rain before that's it?  and as the item gains worth, wouldn't it have to rain harder and harder before it makes sense to pop that cork?
increasing:
	marvin first i'll flunk out of college, then i'll marry too young. as i abandon the carefree days of youth for those of ever-increasing responsibility, i'll grow bitter and withdrawn.
incurred:
	 no, by putting food to the use it was sacrificed for--nourishing me--i am paying the karmic debt incurred by the food producers. it is a moral good!
inda:
	womans 2 inda vizabul witlibberdey annjus tisferol
indecency:
	039039;  indecency is suggested
indelible:
	chad  that copywriter must be grinning like a chimp to know that his or her creative work is an indelible part of an entire generation.
indiana:
	john "month of may" was actually a minor 1962 hit by the indiana group the calendar lads.
indication:
	- so don't take this letter as an indication of any sentiment on my part, good or ill, although i suppose i hope that you...
indictments:
	candidate i promise you, the media will have to work overtime to keep up with my illicit shenanigans. mistresses. bribery. indictments 24/7.
indifferent:
	leon a better vet would be someone sociopathically indifferent to the suffering of god's creatures.  only then would he or she be able to maintain professionalism in the face of each day's crippling tragedy.
indignantly:
	a man indignantly comments on a newspaper, speaking to a second man.
indirectly:
	135135;  scissors indirectly case strife
individuals:
	 two individuals, carl and someone we'll call floyd, in old-fashioned diving suits. 
indo:
	dennis bouncing a wiffle ball on the shell of an irate turtle while chanting archaic epithets in every indo-european language?
induced:
	077077;  vomiting is induced
indulged:
	044044;  urges are indulged
indulging:
	wife wilfred your insistence on indulging every fool with a paranormal tuba will be the ruin of this marriage
industrialist:
	malki ! oh. hello there! i'm david malki !, explorer, industrialist, and ceo of wondermark industries ...
industrious:
	glenn  what an industrious moron.
industriousness:
	julius  if they are true friends, they will respect your industriousness and commitment.
inedible:
	652652; putting the 'indie' in 'inedible'
ineffective:
	milo we think our house is being haunted by an ineffective ghost.
ineffectual:
	man 1 just one that reads "bumper stickers are an ineffectual means of communicating my nuanced views on a variety of issues that cannot be reduced to a single pithy slogan." oh, and some dried blood, i think.
inefficient:
	jimmy unlike the animals, in order to communicate we must convert ideas down into inefficient sets of words.  this is such a lost of nuance that it's like recounting an opera in morse code.  to a cocker spaniel, human speech is like beeping in german.
ineligible:
	you're ineligible!
inequality:
	007007;  inequality is acknowledged
inexorable:
	father each day you must reassert your primacy anew over your own destiny. and all the while, your body will daily discover new and horrid frailties in its slow, inexorable march towards death.
inexplicably:
	with the help of a { sarcastic female techno-geek, tomboyish female mechanic, shape-shifting female assassin, leather-clad female in shades, girl who's always loved him, bookish female scholar with mousy brown hair, cherubic girl with pigtails and spunk, female who inexplicably becomes attracted to the damaged protagonist for unstated reasons
infallible:
	you're not infallible enough to be pope.
infantry:
	 pfc. pierce heroically hid in a trench while his legs were located by members of the 1st infantry
infants:
	  for example, everyone "knows" that smoking is bad.  so when you try to explain that yes, smoking is largely bad--but it's also highly effective, in infants, at warding off murderous trans-dimensional bellybutton gnomes...
infatuation:
	763763;  an infatuation shatters
infect:
	"to whom it may concern at noon tomorrow, my plague will begin to infect the entire city.  unless, of course..."  new paragraph...
infectious:
	 i worked on the television campaign for the movie 'robots' and at one point we used the james brown song 'dr. detroit' and there is a line that goes, 'get up offa that thang, dance 'til you feel better, get up offa that thang, tryn'ta relieve that pressure' and i swear it was so infectious i had to keep standing up and dancing feverishly before i could go on
inferno:
	exterior inferno.
infest:
	 infest  
infinity:
	ken [narrating the math again] uh, well, you see, h.v.i. is merely a comparison metric to help you see how haircuts of different prices match up!  it, uh, can't help you find the very best value haircut in the world or anything like that!  that'd be a free haircut that looks good forever.  that limit goes to infinity.  zombies take over the planet and your corpse still looks great, that sort of thing.  forget it.  it's unachievable!
inflict:
	 inflict 
inflicted:
	ken they're not dying from a haircut they're dying from a severe stab would that i inflicted
influence:
	dad that's right. and i don't want you hanging out with jake anymore. he's a bad influence.
infrastructural:
	katie okay, c'mon, sample ballot page eight propositions.  shall the state chapter be amended and ordinance adopted to fund a bond measure allocated for infrastructural repairs?
infrastructure:
	 at&t stands for american telephone and telegraph.  because telegrams are such an important part of our communications infrastructure
infront:
	a man is reading a newspaper, and a woman is standing infront of him for no obvious reason.
ingratiating:
	 and by the way, your diary entry from last thursday misspelled 'ingratiating!'
inhabit:
	- i will inhabit any fantasy world that will put shredder on my body.
inhale:
	- i'm beginning to inhale your brain. you might feel light-headed or dizzy. that's normal. some memories will start to fade. i'd advise thinking really hard about your favorites.
inherently:
	vince i don't know, it seems to me that any pun or permutation of the 'girls gone wild' concept would just be inherently in poor taste, especially at marketing directed at children.  also, it sends the tacit message that 'girls gone wild' is a normal and acceptable part of our culture - when in fact it's seedy trash that thrives on the most crass and debased elements of human nature.
inherit:
	 inherit a fortune at 
inheritance:
	 genetic inheritance! a tricky subject! the transmission disequillibrium test is one way to measure the over-transmission of an allele from heterozygous parents to affected offspring!
inhuman:
	leon that's why i should be your first choice for pet surgery!  i'll display an inhuman detachment during your snookie's suffering, or you get half off your first cremation!   leon's budget veterinary - on sixth, upstairs from payday-loans-n-go!
inhumane:
	carlos we do not know of any border fence.  what a strange and inhumane concept!
initiated:
	jim what if he's calling me back?   we'll get each other's voicemail.  why isn't there a rule for this situation yet?  such as "in the event of a dropped call, regardless of the cause, it is the responsibility of the person who initiated the call to call the other party back."   there.   how hard was that?   not very
initiating:
	old  you'll not hear much of anything once my cynthia finishes initiating her binary defense protocols!
injected:
	picture of potato injector - it's got a crank, a needle, some faded potatoes in the background, and a picture of it being injected into some guys arm
injection:
	terry "i even got so far as taking the test.  but it turns out i don't have any taste buds."  "i am made of injection-molded plastic slapped with acrylic paint and cheap decals to appear alive."
inkblots:
	thaddeus when do we get to the inkblots?
inkling:
	man1 though if i fill too many more blue books with manifestos they may start to get an inkling.
inlaid:
	a squareish design is shown, divided into parts, that say "carpet," "wood," "c8, ny," and "621 b'way." parquet and inlaid floors, borders for rugs, baseboards, decks, crown molding, doors, anything wood feeds our weird fetish.
inmost:
	umberto i wish to peer into your inmost being with this aforementioned magical eye.  don't be self-conscious!  just act normal!
innings:
	"dirty legs" mackay after two innings, the score is four-one, metroville.
innocent:
	text his innocent appearance is for gobbling children up
innovator:
	 i'm here for a meeting with dr. rasmus endofarb, drinking straw innovator?
inquisition:
	gax no silly questions, my false-brother. i am a curiosity ripe for inquisition.
inquisitor:
	woman more poop, grand inquisitor?
insanely:
	amy  it's this insanely-long series of letters.  my boss is a security freak.
insanity:
	272272;  shirley makes dubious claims to insanity
insatiable:
	mr. gax if elected, i pledge to feed all humans over sixty into the insatiable furnace of my galactic death-cruiser
inscribed:
	student  i want to major in making inscribed plaques.
insertion:
	 troubleshooting the injector becomes clogged after veinous insertion. solution pump foot-pedal vigorously. potato will resume flowing.
insides:
	the insides of things are beautiful. let's see what they look like.
insideways:
	don't look at me like that!  you gonna trigger a thing insideways that's been doing just fine shielded by the gut layer!
insightful:
	hatless strong handshake, insightful questions.
insignificant:
	714714; an insignificant detail
insinuating:
	becca i don't appreciate you insinuating that i'm being a jerk!
insistence:
	wife wilfred your insistence on indulging every fool with a paranormal tuba will be the ruin of this marriage
insists:
	 i like the daily show a lot, but nobody seems to listen to jon when he insists (truthfully) that it's a comedy show, not a factual news show.
inspected:
	garth well, you don't know if maybe the cuddle inspector is some appointed crony of his or something!  maybe the cuddles haven't been inspected for weeks!  ya might never get to snoozyville because the cuddles all freeze up halfway between bakersfield and fresno!
inspiration:
	dan well, let's see.  i outlined my next couple projects, set up a filing system for my notes, and downloaded a productivity program...then i read an article about time management and filed it away in the new system...then brainstormed over instant-messenger for a while, while watching youtube clips for "inspiration."
inspired:
	dr. helfsquiggle totally!  bret michaels basically raised me.  through the tape player in my camaro.  oh!  and i'm pretty sure the lyrics for "ride the wind" were at least partially inspired by one of my fan letters.
install:
	signboard 2 car stereos and alarms ~ free install only today
installing:
	joanne and rather than park our cars tandem, i'm installing a hoist that will store the cars one atop the other.  long-term, i have plans to build a stadium-style rolling roof to protect our entire property from hailstorms.
instantly:
	my judo strike had paralyzed him instantly.  he was limp, his blood hot on my hands.
instants:
	bart we'll be up front hearing people cough and shuffle around, while cameras all around us are capturing instants, preserving the most fleeting of glances, showing us (and those to come after us) more than we could ever notice on our own.  in a way, the day when everyone gathers and performs the ceremony is simply a run-through for the cameras.  the documentary evidence is what lasts forever.
instincts:
	 trust your instincts at 
institute:
	 in fact, he has his master's in catology and has done extensive post-graduate work at the cat institute in cattington but stopped short of getting his ph.d. due to an unfortunate catastrophe
instituting:
	or instituting a competency surcharge for paying the bill on time.
institutional:
	dora oh, i know.  it's institutional at this point.  it's not a matter of if, but how.
institutions:
	 if the financial institutions are ever to recognize our independent sustainable microeconomy we must continue to wage our passive-aggressive awareness campaign.
instruction:
	easy step-by-step instruction list -- utterly foolproof
insulin:
	gax i assure you, helen what you would term my pancreas does not secrete enough insulin to allow me to handle what you would term your cookies.  it's a condition.
insulted:
	146146;  a triumph is insulted
intact:
	wilfred's smoking skull, mutton chops intact
integers:
	jimbo on the phone hey, 35!  how are ya?  it's jimbo.  how's life?  how're the fractions?  they grow up so fast, huh?  they'll be integers before you know it.  listen, remember last april?  we put you in that ledger that went national?
intellectual:
	  writing to the president of inventions is like writing to santa claus, except that the president of inventions is a notorious intellectual-property thief and santa claus is imaginary.
intelligence:
	nora what?  did you spill it?  did you burn your central intelligence agency?  should we be expecting some sort of cash payout from yum! brands, inc.?
intended:
	man #2  i'm starting to think this isn't a restaurant so much as a performance-art installation intended to give you the ordering experience.
intends:
	when i broke the water main, i awoke a fearsome hydro-dragon who intends to devour us all unless i bring him a giant stack of cookies.
intent:
	063063;  amourous intent factors
intentioned:
	 most likely the possum was, like us all, generally well-intentioned despite having some distinct faults.
interact:
	isaac  that's just the danger!  before, his "mild fetish" might have atrophied as he was forced to interact with society at large.
interaction:
	social interaction is just a word problem with lots of variables.
interactions:
	all your interactions colored by people either flirting with you or judging you.  sometimes both simultaneously.
interchanges:
	 in los angeles, where i live, there seem to have been a lot of people whose dire need for employment somehow trumped the city engineer's need for people who actually knew how to design highway interchanges
intergalactic:
	- you really believe that the super-rich are protecting the rest of us from intergalactic annihilation?
interminable:
	ernestina but that's the problem! the enthusiasm is only good for about a day. so you can wait it out until it joins the interminable list of "good ideas you'll never do" - or you can just spend that energy. dive in. just try something. / better to do something with passion that turns out misguided, than carefully decide to do nothing at all. 
intern:
	for any intern thou hast raped, thou must forfeit one sick day.
interpersonally:
	  apparently we are beyond the point in human history when problems must be solved interpersonally.
interplay:
	 i can dig it. it ain't the process, it's the meaning. it's putting a hand in the windstream of that old, ancient interplay between fabric and moisture.
interpreter:
	george the interpreter? / clara it's working!
interrupt:
	woman 2 don't interrupt me, child!  we are mid-incantation.  wonnayshun un durgahd
interruption:
	013013;  an interruption occurs
intersection:
	 cheaplaugh manor is on piddlepaddle lane at the intersection of whoopydoo and yardeyardeyaryar
interstate:
	interstate 10 at the pepper offramp...
interstellar:
	carlos behold our interstellar nebula cruiser!
intervals:
	approx. 3cm intervals
intestinal:
	 i.t. stands for intestinal torsion
intestines:
	that sandwich will traverse about 20 feet of intestines over the next few hours!
intolerable:
	  reason #485 why it would suck to be a cave i bet babies used to be even more annoying than they are today. all of today's babies are descended from the subset of caveman babies that were not intolerable enough to destroy.
intolerance:
	- oxygen intolerance?
intransigence:
	fur collar  the recontextualization of not just disposable but disposed of victorian imagery in the milieu of 21st century web-based publication and distribution is a baldly ironic statement of luddite intransigence, but with a humanizing layer of nostalgia and longing for vanished standards of craftsmanship and civility
intravenously:
	everyone has experienced trouble related to insufficient potato consumption. but how to make time for the labor involved in regular kitchen preparation? with the potato injector, the time for fretting is past. using surgical-grade tubing, the injector pipes pulped potato nectar into your body intravenously.
intricate:
	[the cat begins to play an intricate composition]
introduce:
	you don't introduce the guys as handsome, you know?
intrusion:
	main panel you've been marketed to!  some douche sent an intrusion using marketing  we don't believe you've seen enough commercial messages today!  we firmly believe that web content should serve no greater purpose than to attract eyeballs that we can cram full of ads.  and since you've already proven you're dumb enough to spend a dollar on an imaginary "gift," why shouldn't we press our luck?  we know that garish, omni-present ads eventually drove you away from myspace, but we figure we can get a good six months' worth of impressions out of you before you get fed up with us, too!
intrusively:
	066066;  ben acts intrusively
inutility:
	562562; inutility of a jingle
invade:
	 invade 
invasion:
	perkins are we gonna get to pee before we start the invasion?
inventin:
	 if i were on a desert island with a unicycle i bet within six weeks i would be inventin' all sorts of mad new techniques
inverted:
	ken i take pride in my haircuts!  i want to get good value from them!  i'm not a mathematician, robert!  i barely an aesthetician.  but now i'm ruining people's lives!  i inverted a fraction and people are dying.  they're dying in the streets!  i don't know how to stop it!  i don't know how to make it right!
investigated:
	many municipal power plants already use coal to generate electricity. some enterprising folks have had the clever idea to eliminate the middleman and consume coal directly, using it to power home appliances, vehicles, pets, plants - anything in need of energy. can this be done feasibly and safely? we have investigated, and the answer appears to be no. absolutely not. the notion is ridiculous.
investing:
	barnes okay, well, here's the thing. the best way to get rich is through real estate investing. but it's got to be a passion.
investment:
	radislov what if i told you i'd written an investment book not geared towards gullible suckers?  one specifically for cynical, pragmatic types?
inviolable:
	carlos on mexico, creatures are segregated by horn quality into inviolable casts that annually rotate civic duties,  right now twosies are the lawyers, threesies the bakers, and ninesies like us are the astronauts.
invoice:
	jimbo listen, '5.  you think you could do me a solid on this?  we'd put you right up front on a major invoice.  yeah.  unit price.  you'd be a multiplier.  big job.  that's why i called you.  thanks, '5.  you're a pro.  i'll dial you in.  see you in excel.
involuntarily:
	chris' throat bulges and his head rears back involuntarily.
involves:
	mindy a couple of bucks won't solve anything.  you'll just spend it on booze, right?  so you can blot out the reality of your sorry existence?  the only real solution to the problem of homelessness involves counseling coupled with mental health therapy and free, comprehensive addiction treatment when needed.
involving:
	pan out to parker and dave doing something involving a ladle and a container inside a wooden frame.
inward:
	262262;  disdain is turned inward
iodine:
	(5) tie off arm above the elbow and tap to make the basilic vein bulge. daub with iodine and give the needle-crank three full turns.
iowa:
	bugle correction a statement in yesterday's bugle regarding gravity was found to be incorrect.  the bugle regrets the error.  correction tuesday's bugle incorrectly identified the governor of iowa as terry barnstad.  the correct spelling is branstad.
iran:
	otto all our money has a history.  bribes paid to politicians...hush money paid to victims...drugs and even human beings bought and sold...that money makes its way into our banks.  it carries negativity with it.  someone's starting a business, or buying toys for their baby?  they don't want iran-contra money.  they want nice money.  money with positive energy.
iraqi:
	ole so where's all the oil?  why are gas prices at record highs?   shouldn't poined iraqi oil be flooding the u.s. market?
iraqis:
	fat  the japanese in world war ii were determined to fight to the very last man.  that was their battle plan!  took a couple of bombs, but we changed their minds.  i think these iraqis don't have half the resolve we think they do.
irene:
	then aunt irene said i should try antique shops.  do you know i went to every antique shop in town?  but nobody even knew what i was talking about!
irish:
	 he is not even irish
ironclad:
	woman you wouldn't show up in court without having your case ironclad!
irradiated:
	walt breaking news.  tragedy strikes eastern europe as a trainload of irradiated hamsters derails in the former soviet republic of georgia.
irregardless:
	irregardless of what him and me decided, we found a different book than that.
irrelevant:
	julius  james, i need you to stay late and work on some massive, irrelevant project.
irreparably:
	a gardening tool is just any possession you don't mind irreparably soiling, charles
irresistible:
	 would you still love me if this nightmare became real tonight, susan? if the moon and the stars and my birthday just happened to combine in an awful, irresistible alchemy?
irrevocably:
	josh  absolutely none.  in fact, less than none, considering what information i do have is irrevocably flawed.
irrigation:
	the lid to the lipstick "6. the lid to the lipstick can catch tears, which, instead of wasted on him, can be put to use for irrigation!"
irritated:
	ralph is irritated to see this.
irritating:
	benjy  a petition to ban irritating street solicitors?
irs:
	otto in fact i decide that i still have all the significant dollars from my lifetime!  my first paycheck and my first fiction sale and that refund i got from the irs for being handsome!
ishtar:
	 go close to the eanna temple, the residence of ishtar, such as no later king or man equaled!  go up the wall of uruk and walk around, examine its foundation, inspect its brickwork thoroughly.  go 0.8 miles on broadview terrace, then bear slight right turn and turn onto california avenue, for your destination will be on the right.
isolated:
	- hidden away in this isolated barn, you must submit to my every whim!
isolation:
	- what?  no! / it's a television isolation pod.  (sicko)
israelites:
	suited man with beard the israelites farted in the monkey of the lord, and he snuggled them into the uvula of the midianites.
issued:
	ben  that rebate is issued as a prepaid visa card.
isuzu:
	francine (sings)  jim miller's discount isuzu! check us ooout on yelp.
italian:
	do you sleep on the most comfortable mattress in the world? of course you do not. the most comfortable mattress in the world is owned by an italian stockbroker. but we saw it in a magazine and modeled ours after what it is probably like. still most likely a step up for you. mattresses & meat
itching:
	drew why am i itching?  oh, that's right - i'm horribly allergic to puns.
itsy:
	from now on, when you feel my itsy bitsy butt muscles clench atop the mound of your misshapen hump, that, my friend, is when you do not drop me
jabbed:
	- if you look real close, you can see the dot were i jabbed her with my pencil. go on, take a gander, she don't mind.
jabbing:
	a soldier of the raj leaps over the table, jabbing at francis with his bayonet.
jackals:
	- "i have hated esau; i have made his hill country a desolation, and his heritage a deset for jackals."
jackpot:
	sitting  won the big jackpot. thirty million after taxes.
jagged:
	foster  it's fatal, barnes.  fell on a jagged branch.  tasting bark in my throat even now.
jammed:
	 cell phone lines were jammed.  everyone was so busy fielding concerned calls from out-of-state relatives that they didn't notice the giant meteor oh noooooooo
jams:
	giacomo, wearing a wifebeater and jams, with shades and a box-fade (and muttonchops, an interesting addition), stands nearby as ross, sporting whitesnake hair and a giant clock on a chain around his neck, speaks about the enormous contraption at center.
jar:
	- for example, sometimes i'll eat peanut butter right out of the jar!  seriously!  and today - i'm wearing two different-colored socks!  just to be wacky!
jaunty:
	the bucket is gone, to reveal a woman's head on the platter. complete with jaunty bonnet. it is facing marcus.
jaw:
	chris' eyes bulge as his head is forced back painfully far.  his jaw is practically unhinged and his throat is swollen grotesquely.  a mass protrudes from his mouth, and atop the mass is a banner reading thanks.
jaws:
	father soon, nothing will be handed to you any longer. you will fight for everything, snatching every small victory from the unrelenting jaws of fate.
jcpenney:
	 harry quickly hides his iphone.  'now, the internet won't exist until you're in high school,' he says, 'but here's a jcpenney catalog that came with the sunday paper.'
jealous:
	 don't tell me you're jealous.
jeans:
	gustave i see a slim figure, tight jeans, shaggy hair, sort of a pleasant boyishness - so i'm angling for a closer look -  and whoops!  it's a guy, wearing chuck taylors and listening to arcade fire.
jelly:
	- your coat is covered in old jelly stains and you breath smells like beef wellington. be still, my heart. and the clincher? i can almost hear the crab lice playing volleyball in your shorts.
jeopardize:
	walter  they never say anything, 'cause they don't want me to know.  it might jeopardize their very existence in the future!  
jeopardizing:
	timmy well then they are jeopardizing their tips
jerry:
	jerry a peacock hey!  my eyes are down here!
jessie:
	jessie will you shut up!
jesters:
	 naughty jesters
jeweled:
	 the man on the far left is is declining a refill from a jeweled vial of tears collected from the woman second from the right
jeweler:
	a jeweler's hammer, a magnifying work lamp and digital calipers in a leather case.
jewels:
	hugo damascus!  the mayor's crown jewels have been stolen!
jewess:
	127127;  gracie is burned by a jewess
jewish:
	i mean, happy jewish new year!  it's rosh hashanah.
jicama:
	first gentle those were supposed to be fries? i figured it was jicama that'd been left out in the sun for some reason.
jig:
	a leprechaun sings and dances a jig as a couple watch.
jigawatts:
	 1.21 jigawatts of 
jilted:
	woman where is he -- let me at the bastard -- next time you try to pay off a jilted lover, david !, you'd best be sure the check don't bounce. fool gon' wish he'd been born without eyeballs, once i gets to stabbin'.
jiminy:
	evie thinking hold on.  if he?d found the baby knives then he?d be keeping much farther away from me.  that can only mean?jiminy christmas he found the marshmallow room
jingled:
	fat  what if we jingled
jingles:
	martha  isn't it weird how car-dealership jingles are implanted more firmly than pretty much anything else we learned as a child?
jog:
	it may be .0001 miles per hour to you, but to me, watching you jog by, your sandwich is traveling at 6.0001 miles per hour!
jogger:
	frans ...and right as i looked over my shoulder a jogger ran by!  it startled me so bad!
johnsons:
	if obama wins, it'll probably be historic for reasons other than his being the fourteenth (after carter, nixon, jefferson, cleveland, both johnsons, tyler, hayes, jackson, madison, grant, wilson and arguably taylor) to feature palindromic vowel-consonant dispersion.
joined:
	they are joined by a short man with a signboard and a person hidden by their signboard and umbrella
joint:
	terry check out my awesome new marionette! completely lifelike.  fully articulated.  accurate joint physics.
joints:
	bernardo got cysts in my gut. calcium in my gallbladder. spurs in my joints. some kind of parasite living in my spine, and over a dozen different types of gout.
joking:
	 i don't think he was joking
jon:
	 i like the daily show a lot, but nobody seems to listen to jon when he insists (truthfully) that it's a comedy show, not a factual news show.
jonas:
	king arch-fiend jonas!
jones:
	- all set for the next reading.  miss jones, are you ready to copy?
jong:
	wo oh, geez...i could spell it out, and you'd probably follow it fine up through kim jong-il breakdancing, but then there's a cognitive leap to "jellyfish sandwiches" that would take all freakin' night to explain.
jornavenich:
	left i got it in from alistano down at the dog creamery. bifton got pinked by jornavenich!
journalists:
	caption opportunistic tv journalists
journals:
	 the legends come down to us in yellowed fur-trappers'  journals...in shaky rough-hewn script, scrawled by fading candlelight, a single penciled word 'awesome.'
journeyman:
	a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild ocd, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert
joust:
	thea  i don't want to joust anymore, janice.
jousters:
	thea but let's just face facts.  there are just not enough jousters in anchorage.  why did we stress ourselves out about this stupid tournament?  why do we constantly make life difficult on purpose?
joviality:
	048048;  joviality proves unwise
joyce:
	gene leprechauns, mainly.  also clovers, guinness, green stuff, and james joyce novels.   did i say clovers already?
joyfulness:
	gentle well, that's why you're here, sweetie. to balance things back out a bit with your joyfulness.
joyous:
	clarence so, let us all give praise to saturn for another joyous winter solstice.
jr:
	harry jr it's bad for my brain.
judging:
	all your interactions colored by people either flirting with you or judging you.  sometimes both simultaneously.
judgment:
	we are not urged to be good for goodness' own sake, but rather to escape judgment.
judo:
	my judo strike had paralyzed him instantly.  he was limp, his blood hot on my hands.
jug:
	carla (to herself)  his pans aren't greased...there's forks in the microwave...the milk jug is in the oven...
juggle:
	soldier no, you fool! fire only makes them juggle
juggling:
	skippy now stands on his head while juggling the barrel with his feet.
juiced:
	162162;  an infant is juiced
jul:
	 gledelig jul 
julie:
	- as utter non-existance goes, i'm glad you went for the medium size. it fits just right in my breakfast nook. say hi to uncle crandall. julie
jumpy:
	jason nope, keep it coming.  still feeling jumpy...
jungian:
	of a sailboat "1. model sailboat can be used to repel aphids from plants. aphids have a jungian aversion to open water, and the presence of the boat implies a nearby regatta."
junkyards:
	glen flying kites through outdoor malls. sitting on rooftops watching traffic ebb and flow. collecting loose nuts and bolts from junkyards, then spending lonely evenings trying to match them all up.
jus:
	george washington ...all i gotta do is just touch my arm - and a million skin cells fly off. a million of 'em! jus' hangin' in the air! probly breathin' 'em up. you ever think of that
justify:
	rudy do you go to some expensive place?  i can never justify spending more than about eight dollars on a haircut.  haircuts make me anxious.
justin:
	 okay, you can come up, but i have to finish this letter. i'll love you in a second. writing "...regrets to inform you that your son justin..."
juvie:
	alberta then we've got billy's juvie hearing, but the car blew a head gasket, so we'll have to leave at five am to catch the bus.   also, the basement is flooded, your mother keeps calling, and i'm pregnant.
kabbalah:
	for zion, o heathen, is where i deprive myself of every human comfort to more fully understand the deep mysteries of kabbalah.
kabuki:
	"no. we're kept at arm's length by the kabuki of politeness. we have to roleplay as people who aren't invisible connected, pretending we actually don't know everything we know. and for what? so we can talk about the weather with someone we deeply admire?"
kaga:
	 chairman kaga's gone too far
kangaroos:
	jeff  i might be dreaming of home, or of loves long lost, or of chocolate or ice cream or kangaroos or anything--and she is always there, and the dream is always from that point tainted.
kansas:
	wilbur i think it's more likely that the property values are lower in high-risk areas.  you can afford a trailer in kansas if you're willing to take the risk of living in tornado country.
kari:
	 kari i was going to do a special comic #170 about germany for you but i forgot and i apologize
karma:
	701701; the karma of currency
karmic:
	 no, by putting food to the use it was sacrificed for--nourishing me--i am paying the karmic debt incurred by the food producers. it is a moral good!
katana:
	a ninja on a unicycle is charging the woman with katana and shuriken in hand
kathump:
	<<kathump>>
kayak:
	two men are carrying what appears to be a kayak on their shoulders
kc:
	 that was kc and the sunshine band
keel:
	man, yesterday i was fine. now i'm a bucket of meat about to keel over.
keen:
	stumpy huh.   well...i hate to say it, but i'm not too keen on it.
kelp:
	 oh, bobby, bobby ... how can you get kelp in every single orifice?
kendra:
	billy oh!  and kendra's friend is a dj with his own equipment!
kenmore:
	 kenmore erects giant fridge to memorialize him, self-promote
kenya:
	do you own tea estates in kenya and tanzania?  do you invest millions every year in tea research?  do you attract tea experts from around the world to work for you?
kern:
	 lead, kern or get out of the way 
kerosene:
	- stakes and garlic! fetch me kerosene!
kerry:
	 kerry gasparov at the top of his form
kewl:
	- nah, it's all like "omg tuna is kewl" and crap like that. i really only subscribe to be polite.
keyboard:
	man and woman talking to each other. cat on piano keyboard behind them. sixteenth notes in background of panel.
keyed:
	employer i think you eliminated that option when you keyed my car on your way in.
keyholes:
	  to prevent lockpicking, we poured candle wax and chewing gum into all the keyholes
khan:
	- how about genghis khan swanson.  idi amin swanson.  james k. polk swanson.  rudolf diesel swanson.
kickback:
	senator kickback  you have some gall, mr. morton!  there's no way i'm adding this rider to the education act!
kiddies:
	 i hear the kiddies like them the bubblicious schnapps
kidnapping:
	man 1 because he was out kidnapping squirrels to torture in twisted experiments. his fetid dungeon is filled with the stench of despair. but no more! the forest need tremble in fear no longer!
kiiiaaaiiiii:
	ninja on unicycle kiiiaaaiiiii
killer:
	 killer deals 
kills:
	horse you know, when a horse kills a man, it's ruled an accident.
kindergarten:
	 also not having attended earth kindergarten he would not have developed an immunity to cooties
kindle:
	"he's got a music-review tumblr full of sick mp3s, and he self-published a kindle book of paranormal post-apocalyptic erotica."
kindly:
	two aliens with long spiky feathers crowning their bird-style feathered heads address a middle-aged woman with her hair pulled back severely, dressed in a long-sleeved dark dress with an apron.  she is holding a round serving tray in her right hand, angled against her body, and has her left arm akimbo. she responds to them in a matter-of-fact yet kindly manner.
kinesiology:
	i admit to being a bit foggy on the kinesiology.
kinght:
	 just then the kinght came charging up, but he could only move in l-shapes so that dastardly bishop escaped
kinks:
	phil but it wasn't me!  it didn't have my childhood or my kinks or my aspirations or any of the unspoken fears that color the real me's daily decision-making.
kissed:
	woman oh, howard is just the worst! i should never have kissed him!
kissy:
	  such a kissy little girl!  yes you are!  what a sweetie!
kites:
	glen flying kites through outdoor malls. sitting on rooftops watching traffic ebb and flow. collecting loose nuts and bolts from junkyards, then spending lonely evenings trying to match them all up.
kits:
	 a sorely needed addition to those little travel kits with the eye-masks and the mini-socks
kittens:
	- he killed all those children! and those he didn't kill, he maimed! and what about all the kittens he nailed to that fence?
kitty:
	i have a cat.  i have a kitty cat.
kiwanis:
	mr. meanscary  this is going to make it very hard to volunteer for the kiwanis club.
kleenex:
	leonard we use handkerchiefs now, instead of kleenex.  and washable cotton rags instead of paper towels.
klexbart:
	klexbart grandma you crazy
knead:
	foster  will you knead her gums thrice daily?
kneecaps:
	chester some guys claim a mental condition.   others are hard-core and break their own kneecaps.
kneeling:
	a man in a turban appears, kneeling at the bearded man's side
kneepad:
	mother we're here with my son! he's learning to skate and needed a certain type of kneepad. it's only sold in five stores in this part of the state and the one here was the only one that carried it in extra-small!
knit:
	rub her down each evening with a mitt hand-knit from the hairs of her own mane?
knobs:
	 it was making all sorts of screeching noises and when you turn the knobs there is static
knocking:
	joanne ?and over here i'll be knocking through the wall to open the kitchen into the living room.  it'll be fully open, but with a retractable bar that descends from the ceiling for parties, or just for breakfast.
knocks:
	arthur suddenly appears, riding his piranhamoose, fluffy.  fluffy knocks clive down.
knots:
	bobby how we tied knots, and brewed grog, and divvied up the spoils of war...
knowhow:
	tad  but you have absolutely no engineering knowhow, seed capital, or business acumen whatsoever!
knox:
	eugene the dollars in jefferson's and ford's times were on the gold standard!  they corresponded to specific lumps of metal in fort knox!  your arrogant attempt to place yourself at the crossroads of history must begin in 1933 at the earliest!
knuckle:
	 if my toenails became little tiny buck teeth, and the wrinkled skin on each knuckle twisted to become a series of sinister little pointed faces?
komrade:
	apparatchik komrade kringle! perheps i tink ve should do more of de party fundraising and less of de party line, da?
koop:
	 tooth magazine folded in '89 when advertisers withdrew their support following the publishing of a controversial illustration featuring c. everett koop driving a bulldozer through tianenmen square. the caption 'fluoride uber alles'
korea:
	or spy documents he was never able to deliver to his true masters in north korea.
krackel:
	pavel have a krackel.
kraftwerk:
	man #2 also the kraftwerk.
krei:
	glen his posts there inform me about a new username "krei-me-a-riva," which has a livejournal - and that has a link to a newish tumblr.
kreiberscht:
	glen now i got the correct spelling of his name guenters kreiberscht.  googling that reveals an old myspace blog.
kringle:
	apparatchik komrade kringle! perheps i tink ve should do more of de party fundraising and less of de party line, da?
krvngblarwx:
	scotty "gnxbinrff!  hnjyvrnglz!  krvngblarwx!  pkiznvvq!"
kuato:
	 also kuato lives
la:
	 c'est la vie 
label:
	close-up of the can, which is marked colgate & co's peanuts and bears a warning label do not use near cliffs.
lable:
	simon, who... it's not entirely unlike what others sometimes lable as "scrambled eggs."
laborers:
	man #1 they fired my entire data-analysis team and replaced them with day laborers from outside home depot. it is now mathematically impossible to accomplish anything at work.
laboring:
	father look at that man, trenton. he's laboring.
laborious:
	but nothing of value can ever be created without significant, laborious effort.
labyrinth:
	751751; the beast in the labyrinth
laced:
	no children were poisoned by homemade cookies laced with strychnine.
lacerated:
	lincoln i rather think i'd prefer to be attacked by some sort of poisoned razor bees to be stung, poisoned, and lacerated to death than to be snuffed by a common poor person.
lacked:
	774774;  chocolate is lacked
lactose:
	- you there! have you seen my son go by? he's infected by a terrible virus that will kill one-third of the earth's population, making five-eights of those remaining lactose intolerant while granting amazing super-powers to a quarter of the remainder!
laid:
	(tiny voice) i laid it
lament:
	767767; the old farmer's lament
laments:
	613613; the laments of the aged
lamont:
	287287  lamont suffers a scare
landed:
	dr. fipple well, to be honest, he probably didn't get that idea until he landed.
languages:
	hatted toff there are voices that shout at you now, in languages native only to this hour.
larceny:
	255255;  larceny must adapt
lard:
	 loads o' lard at 
lardo:
	- yo! lardo! some of us are waiting to use the scale! hurry it up a bit, huh?
lark:
	wilfred sure i'll give 'er a whirl.  sounds a bit of a lark
larvae:
	  don't worry!  the pulsating just means that the larvae are devouring each other!
larval:
	santa santa is very concerned with your cellulose intake!  it's how he tracks you!  i've also brought some pickled marzipan!  its horridness will stimulate your bile ducts and make you smell less appetizing to the stingroaches i have also brought you.  you should start taking their venom in small doses now, while you are still larval.  be cautious!  they are not tame.
lashed:
	jasper  the internet was once made of computers, not goats lashed together with fiber-optic cables and set adrift in the oceans!
lasses:
	text  so stay close to your parents, lads and lasses, and obey;
lasso:
	a stereoscopic image gus, atop his giant eagle glenda, attempts to lasso the piggybacked and gargantuan anthropomorphized hippos anton and jay.  mount banjo erupts  dramatically in the background.
latex:
	- ah! i see you've fired up the old latex foundry. never too late to take over the family business, then?
latte:
	darrell (a peddler of concoctions) half-caf double tall 2-pump vanilla nonfat light foam latte!
latter:
	a patient sits facing his therapist in the latter's office.
lattes:
	santa whoa, whoa, easy there, champ. this is the list of who ordered lattes.
laughs:
	492492;  rebecca laughs
launches:
	she launches the dog
launching:
	man 2 they're launching missiles at the sun in angry retaliation.
laundering:
	eugene if what you're doing was at all real, it would be called money laundering.
laundress:
	man continues to lurk behind laundress while supportively conversing about her work
lavatory:
	 shocker! i was able to unleash my liquid ingredient in the lavatory and no one stopped me
lavish:
	a man and a woman sit in a lavish bedroom
lavishly:
	 copy-right 1781 ; lavishly illufstrated
lawman:
	002002;  a lawman makes a decision
lawrence:
	for example, the janice s. byerton arts & letters module, the lawrence n. sanders module for music, the chester & doris codberg module for the study of modular education.
lawsuits:
	se—or eugene people like you are making everyone afraid of lawsuits, making everything everywhere more expensive!
laziest:
	student we sing songs about how mexicans are lazy, kids go to mexicans-are-lazy camp, there's all this ritual chanting...  but now is a tough time.  recently the church splity into factions - my group thinks zacatecanos are the laziest, but some crazy nutjobs think it's oaxacans. what a bunch of idiots!
leads:
	468468;  innovation leads to injury
leak:
	538538;  pipes continue to leak
leaky:
	the hollow top half of a ball "3. instead of discarding the half-balls left over from a game of slice-the-ball-in-the-garden, use them to cap off leaky sprinklers or plug gopher holes. the rubber balls are biodegradable, given a long enough timeline."
leands:
	 a mustachioed man holding a cane sits in an easy chair. a woman leands over him, resting her hands on his shoulder.
leaned:
	otto then they leaned in real close over my broken body and whispered "stay off our turf."
learjet:
	man #1 vice president of global operations. he gets  learjet and a butler.
lease:
	i have a medical background.  i'm a plastics enthusiast.  i even have a friend trying to break his lease on
leash:
	a little girl pulls back on her dog's leash.  the dog is growling at a large man.
lectures:
	man1 and it makes listening to lectures so much more interesting.
ledge:
	weighted with stones, we'll throw it onto the roof and hook it over the ledge.
leers:
	a man leers as a woman removes her stockings.
legal:
	 martin's hobbies mostly involve spending long hours imagining, in painstaking detail, what life might be like on a planet where cheetos are legal tender
legalized:
	 dental sodomy has since been legalized in fifteen states
legendary:
	bernie this is shaping up to be a legendary national election!
legends:
	 the legends come down to us in yellowed fur-trappers'  journals...in shaky rough-hewn script, scrawled by fading candlelight, a single penciled word 'awesome.'
leggings:
	second  that was separate! she called my leggings "effete"
legislature:
	cap'n jasper yeah, it's a real problem.  our legislature is at the mercy of big salt.
legitimizing:
	 the most legitimizing of all fonts
leipzig:
	bearded  it's a fully functioning scale replica of the central train depot in leipzig, germany!
lemon:
	extra croutons and a lemon wedge.
lemons:
	 at ihop, ketchup and water and lemons and crackers and ranch dressing are all free
lend:
	jay you begged me to lend you my boat and then you never?
lending:
	donny last year, your brother sacrificed himself to save the planet. / thank god he was able to destroy the alien robots controlling our lending markets and restore the world to prosperity!
lengthy:
	after a lengthy, expensive trial
lens:
	he replaces his monocle with a shaded lens.
lentils:
	sanjay  for me it would be indian food  curries, rice and lentils.
leonardo:
	 the things i have seen, bartleby!  a man named goat see has rediscovered leonardo's 'tunnel of knowledge' festival trick!
leopod:
	leopod don't forget cancer from the scan.
lesser:
	- a lesser man would have just pointed.
lethal:
	bum i regret to inform you that you have now suffered a lethal dose of radium
letmein:
	wait  'letmein.'
leukemia:
	 yeah. but i couldn't take it. every time i had a snickers i'd think, "is this it? is this the one that gives me leukemia?"
levelled:
	- her majesty queen victoria once levelled a disapproving scowl of such ferocious intensity that none of the servant at buckingham palace were capable of shameful bodily functions for three whole days!
leveraged:
	533533;  public opinion is leveraged
levers:
	hap it looks like the flesh of my chest is ripped back and inside my body there is a tiny dinosaur working a series of levers to control me  down one arm there's an army of manatees mounting to stage a coup and take control of the me-throne  down the other arm is the rival army of dinosaurs but they are actually being driven by butterflies in hive-mind mode  climbing up my back there's like a silhouette of myself but it's as if i'm climbing the mountain of me to get my soul back from the dinosaur in my ribcage  and i'm being chased by this fast-growing fungus that is turning my body to mushrooms as it creeps up from my crack
levitating:
	same city backgrond; bug, alone, with outsized levitating mirror, dejectedly evaluates self with displeasure 
lexical:
	 i can only hope that my masterwork will be realized by the lexical might of future generations.
ley:
	 are we on a ley line?  you got my toes trembling.  this is metaphor-y. this is laundry cranked to eleven.
li:
	hat man 1 oh, i haven't seen the third one. the villain is a bird? isn't it a jet li movie?
liable:
	matt my psyche is liable to push me into success.  simply to spite itself.
liberating:
	man1 it's really liberating, not having to worry about being tested on every dumb thing!
liberties:
	- so, the only logical explanation is that the publisher is spying on me! watching my every move, sharting my every emotion... my privacy is gone! my civil liberties violated! i hope my hair looks okay.
libido:
	grandfather  but declaring a religion hems you into declaring beliefs.  and it's much easier to just leave that door open by claiming to be 'spiritual'.  the free pass that affords for your smug little know-it-all libido is just gravy.  
licked:
	364364;  cards are licked
licker:
	but i wouldn't send a two-bit boulder-licker into a carriage-filled roadway wearing this cheapjack chop-job!  where is your pride, sir!
licks:
	a man sits on a bench.  a dog licks his hand.
lieu:
	colonel in lieu of gifts i shall throw stones.  when stones are exhausted i shall throw ice.  we will continue until all present are unconscious.
lifeblood:
	 i will drink deeply of your lifeblood. for this is my sustenance.
lifesaving:
	delia when all we really need to do is retard it by eighty percent - so we'd age at the same rate that lifesaving medicine advances.
lifespan:
	woman it's not nourishing you! all that extra spaghetti is probably shortening your lifespan!
lifestyle:
	edwina forget this boring lifestyle!  let's do something crazy!  let's walk across the country!
lifetimes:
	 all martyrs are misunderstood in their lifetimes.
lifting:
	what a crazy year it's been!  at ace we've had some real challenges.  bill, our muffler expert, suffered a hernia while lifting a catalytic converter--right during our busy "may is for mufflers" promotion!  but we still managed to set a sales record that big al...(cut off)...will be proud of.  our office...
lighten:
	madge i know what you mean.  he really needs to lighten up.
lighthouse:
	- is that a lighthouse?
lighting:
	malcolm  i've been in some pretty fancy public restrooms.  some have mood lighting. others have creepy attendants.
lightly:
	helene ha ha!  oh no, sir.  it's lightly sweetened with distilled agave nectar, so its great for your diet and your sweet tooth!
likeable:
	researcher which of these adjectives would you use to describe the queen? likeable, cool, enjoyable, funny, exciting, impressive, relatable?
likeness:
	117117;  a likeness is attempted
lilting:
	will you teach your children the spoken language of the mighty horse, so she is not the last conversationalist of her strange and lilting dialect?
limbo:
	lost in limbo after his death, he will seek out its fragrant smoke as it rises through the clouds as a pathway to follow toward heaven.
limbs:
	 for your information, my dog lucky has no spine or limbs.
limit:
	ken [narrating the math again] uh, well, you see, h.v.i. is merely a comparison metric to help you see how haircuts of different prices match up!  it, uh, can't help you find the very best value haircut in the world or anything like that!  that'd be a free haircut that looks good forever.  that limit goes to infinity.  zombies take over the planet and your corpse still looks great, that sort of thing.  forget it.  it's unachievable!
limitations:
	 on the peel-off part of the sticker it continues on to say ''...and given the inherent limitations of the medium i frankly cannot comprehend its appeal as a vehicle for the vigorous exchange of ideas"
limp:
	my judo strike had paralyzed him instantly.  he was limp, his blood hot on my hands.
lindsay:
	493493;  lindsay is tagged in a note
lined:
	a young woman is happily chatting away on her 1910s-style bakelite cell phone while three other people are lined up behind her, including a bearded soldier.
lingala:
	later maggie millie!  how are you?  how's the baby? / millie just wonderful!  we've been teaching him lingala, so he'll be uniquely qualified to do humanitarian work in the congo. / maggie but... / millie check and mate
linger:
	bea fernando!  bills don't get paid, projects linger half-completed...honey, you have a problem.   have you thought about going back to procrastinators anonymous?
lipids:
	elle we didn't go into iraq for crude oil.  we went for lipids in general.
lipped:
	chester stands in front of a chart with a thin-lipped smile on his face.
liquefied:
	henry  dad you don't understand i need you to give me a million cookies right now or the invisible dragon is going to devour you and me and mom and everyone and the streets will run red with our liquefied orgaaaaans
liquefy:
	 it has three speeds and a 'liquefy' setting
listened:
	 in fact i married her largely because she has never listened to 96.9 hitz-fm
listerine:
	 the listerine lobby claims another victim
listserv:
	dr. helfsquiggle uh, yeah, hombre!  i've already met up with "ratttrap" from the old listserv.
litigation:
	jill oh yeah.  and i hope you've got a budget for litigation defense - your ad materials are full of terms that some would consider highly offensive racial slurs.
lively:
	- that's it! i'll tolerate your lively piping no longer!
livestock:
	john  well, i'll just explain to the livestock how you like to pal around with wolves.
livetweet:
	mom  well, livetweet yourself to bed.
livingston:
	livingston  criminy am i glad the campaign season is over.  what did you hate the most?
lizard:
	two gaxians, sapient reptiles (human bodies with long necks and lizard heads), are outside a boarded-up building.  to the left is a sign with a banner attached.  the male gaxian sits dejectedly in a chair.
llc:
	chad  what great commercials, to make us remember them even decades later.  thank you, post foods llc!
load:
	barbara a load o' rubbish mos' likely.  all fulla monsters what never existed an' other lies similar.
loads:
	 loads o' lard at 
loans:
	leon that's why i should be your first choice for pet surgery!  i'll display an inhuman detachment during your snookie's suffering, or you get half off your first cremation!   leon's budget veterinary - on sixth, upstairs from payday-loans-n-go!
loathing:
	big bird every day i live is a tsunami of intense hatred and self-loathing.
lobster:
	clive  how are you getting so many signatures for lobster rights?
lobsters:
	 no lobsters were harmed at 
location:
	francine  and they always include the location. no other jingle tells you where to physically go and get the product.
locked:
	amos i was mugged, for god's sake! in what world do i then get locked up?
lockjaw:
	 actually lockjaw would be a pretty good control for children
lockpicking:
	  to prevent lockpicking, we poured candle wax and chewing gum into all the keyholes
locks:
	woman welcome to locks for lymphoma. can i help you?
locusts:
	god and lo, i shall bring pestilence and locusts to all of accounts payable, until someone teaches cynthia the proper use of the 'reply all' button.
lofty:
	278278;  rick has lofty goals
logically:
	 ...so, logically you should kiss me now.
logistical:
	we still take time as a family to exchange gifts and commemorate the birth of christ,  but we do it free of media nonsense and logistical hassle.
lola:
	lola so you're just giving up?
lollipop:
	kid 1 i bet you sold secret magic lollipop formuals to the chinese.
loneliest:
	caption  the loneliest controller
loneliness:
	215215;  logic begets loneliness
loner:
	a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild ocd, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert
longest:
	bob  yet somehow we manage the longest life expectancy in human history.
longing:
	fur collar  the recontextualization of not just disposable but disposed of victorian imagery in the milieu of 21st century web-based publication and distribution is a baldly ironic statement of luddite intransigence, but with a humanizing layer of nostalgia and longing for vanished standards of craftsmanship and civility
longingly:
	a man reaches longingly for a woman, who recoils from his touch.
lookslike:
	- not my fault... this guy lookslike he knows the area.
looo:
	harold for example, yesterday a guy asked why there's a surcharge for pickups from the airport.  hel-looo!   municipal regulations have stipulated that surcharge ever since it passed the city assembly!  it's completely detailed in the cab company's contract with the airport authority!
looooove:
	frans i need hugs my hug meter is so low looooove meeeeee
loophole:
	the resolution loophole
loosened:
	projects are stackable. it's not that i'm starting something new before finishing something old - i'm nesting the new project inside the old. if it has screws, they shall be turned. if it has bolts, they shall be loosened. if it has rivets, they may get along for a while without being pried open, but that probably won't last.
loot:
	a fleeing criminal runs past s.a.m.i.r.  he drops a bag of loot.
lordy:
	- lordy, i'm saved! i'm starved, and badly hurt!
los:
	 in los angeles, where i live, there seem to have been a lot of people whose dire need for employment somehow trumped the city engineer's need for people who actually knew how to design highway interchanges
losing:
	a banner at the top reads "striving boldly into new arenas (and losing interest)"
losses:
	caption extensive job losses continue to mount.
lotion:
	shopkeeper man, i've been selling clean out of deodorant, hand lotion, and perfume! / i swear, it's like people been throwing it away.
lottery:
	sitting  bought a lottery ticket today.
loudest:
	 the candidates debate. there's a light that blinks yellow three times and then turns green. at the green, whoever yells ''jobs'' the loudest becomes president.
louisiana:
	otto so, earlier, when i swiped my debit card in the cab, i transferred to the driver part of henry ford's profit from the sale of the first model t.  later, i bought a bag of fun-size snickers with the same dollar thomas jefferson used to buy point-oh-seven square miles of louisiana!
lounging:
	two men are lounging about in chairs, a man in the background is pouring tea
lovebirds:
	farmer  ah hah! i knew there was some shenanigans goin' on back here!  you two lovebirds are in a heap o'trouble!
lowest:
	armand think of it!  the lowest per-capita carbon footprint of any nation on earth!  amazing!
lowlands:
	in the late 19th century a female lowlands gorilla known as "lady millicent" went from the royal zoo to become the toast of high society before marrying a belgian aristocrat for whom she bore many children.
loyal:
	 stay loyal to 
lp:
	john  you're trying to paint this as some sort of character failing, but i have the lp!
lubricating:
	- as you can see, our portable device saves the patient the embarassment and awkwardness of the traditional stirrups and speculum. - i'll begin the exam by inserting a small amount of lubricating paste to help her open and allow light in. - gee! - nurse, please bring in a dose of gyno-paste. (my own formula.) - you may experience some slight discomfort. - hope you're not allergic to peanut butter.  get a clue at   modesty, chastity, virtue
lucifer:
	jesus christ, lord of all humanity, speaks with the beautifully demonic fallen angel lucifer in the cave-like bowels of hell.
lucille:
	lucille (a dog) hrrrr hrrr
luckily:
	bruce we will need to perform a complex and incredibly expensive musical exorcism.  luckily, i just happen to be in a band!  we can probably squeeze you in between our incredibly important gigs in the courts of popes worldwide
lucy:
	lucy the mannheim steamroller lobby thanks the people of america.  democracy works!
luddite:
	fur collar  the recontextualization of not just disposable but disposed of victorian imagery in the milieu of 21st century web-based publication and distribution is a baldly ironic statement of luddite intransigence, but with a humanizing layer of nostalgia and longing for vanished standards of craftsmanship and civility
luminous:
	  now come along, i have a hundred bottles for you to fill with luminous psychoplasma from your fingertips.
lunar:
	dan come in, space command?yes, i'll make another orbit.  heading across the lunar horizon now.
lunatics:
	but instead, a chorus of encouragement from other lunatics strokes his quirk into an obsession that takes over his identity!
lunchmeat:
	character 1 ooh, the lunchmeat's gone bad
lunge:
	jordan  he's taking his stance for the lunge.
lunging:
	julio well, okay, but it was lunging right for us!
lure:
	father  mr. meanscary is a murderous goblin that disguises itself as a puppy butt to lure in children.
lured:
	text he lured a baby off a cliff and waited open-mouthed for it
lurking:
	man continues lurking in a supervisory fashion
lustily:
	rolf if you see movement, call it in.  if you see a squirrel, call it in.  if you see two weird-looking leaves in a row, call it in.  if you see adorable deer frolicking lustily in a meadow, it is probably enemy agents in rented costumes trying to lower your guard.  shoot them and then call it in.
lusts:
	jimbo please!  help!  barbarians have attacked our village!  our sons have been lost to their swords, our daughters to their lusts...
luvva:
	gentle ah for the luvva
luxurious:
	pablo do you know who i am?  i am pablo!  i have shot covers for elle and cosmo and portuguese vogue!  i am paid ten thousand dollars for a single perfect photograph!  my work fills the finest galleries, the most luxurious hotels, the homes and summer homes and yachts and summer yachts of the world's elite!  and you want me to take a tourist snapshot?  of you?
luxury:
	nabil meanwhile i have severe biological imperatives to contend with.  i don't have the luxury of having everything below "car" on the hierarchy of needs taken care of.  i'm hungry.  i'm cold.  i'm tired.  i have to go to the bathroom.  please, allow me to address my body's needs before i help with your ego's.
lymphoma:
	woman welcome to locks for lymphoma. can i help you?
lyrical:
	johnson who says it's preferable to be awake?  pardon me if i relish my nightly visits to a lyrical realm of magic beauty.  why is that something i have to apologize for?  so i don't like leaving that all behind.  who would?
maaaaannnn:
	  'ketchup, five dolla.' maaaaannnn
maakies:
	there's also a bottom strip, just like maakies.
maalkies:
	  maalkies!
mac:
	accordion player b-but i have a mac!
macarena:
	mom hey macarena
machinery:
	four silent strips, three panels each plus title cards, featuring s.a.m.i.r., the helpful clockwork boy.  s.a.m.i.r. is a conglomeration of machinery in a wagon, and he wears a little hat.
macready:
	jordan hmm!  i'm certain that old baker macready did it!
macro:
	mario yeah, i've got a macro.  it's actually not that much trouble once you make it a habit.
madison:
	if obama wins, it'll probably be historic for reasons other than his being the fourteenth (after carter, nixon, jefferson, cleveland, both johnsons, tyler, hayes, jackson, madison, grant, wilson and arguably taylor) to feature palindromic vowel-consonant dispersion.
magically:
	 they are not simply 'magically delicious.' as head flavor manager i work 70+ hour workweeks and i do not appreciate kids thinking it just happens by itself
magnetic:
	inventor four independently-actuated ground-contacting sub-shoes. brushless gear assembly with hot-swappable drive bearings. double camshaft connected to a fully magnetic differential.
magnifier:
	greg let's say there's an expansion bay on my phone.  i can buy third-party modules specific to my needs.  maybe i want a digital tape measure and a level.  maybe i want a micrometer or a magnifier.  sometimes these are things i have to carry with me.  why can't they be on my phone, linked to the processor and the camera and the bluetooth chip?  i could turn my phone into a scanner or a nutritional scale or camera binoculars or fishing radar.  my examples aren't that broad-reaching, but if it's open-source then any tool a sufficiently nerdy subculture can't live without, they'll develop for themselves.  whaddya think?  good idea, huh?
magnifying:
	a jeweler's hammer, a magnifying work lamp and digital calipers in a leather case.
maids:
	bobby i bet my dumb parents never slaughtered a defenseless fishing village and took their women for scullery maids!
mailboxes:
	john  i look up other john smiths in the phone book, then steal checks from their mailboxes.
mailroom:
	 you should hear how he went on when he met the new mailroom guy, abernathy mercutio hoakes-waddleswourthe iv
maim:
	lawyer any zipper that can nick flesh might also maim flesh!
maimed:
	- he killed all those children! and those he didn't kill, he maimed! and what about all the kittens he nailed to that fence?
maintained:
	belief is maintained
majestic:
	a majestic forest.  the goofy elk stands proud on a hillside.
makers:
	a poster reads "a codified set of the builder's, crafter's makers rules." a list follows
makeshift:
	he envisions lightning striking the makeshift lightning-rod.
maketh:
	if ye drinketh the last of the coffee and not maketh more, thou shalt be put to death.
malachi:
	- malachi 13!
malaise:
	woman oh, i've got a touch of the ol' malaise.
mallet:
	  ah!  our scouts report that the enemy commander is far too busy walloping his troops with a croquet-mallet to mount a proper offensive at the moment.  do invite him for tea
mallrats:
	robert  shall we begin with "clerks" or "mallrats?"
mama:
	rev. king his mama wanted to call him quay'shawn.  i said, woman!
mammoth:
	a small mammoth  father o'malley!  is it a sin to look with lust upon a hippopotamus even if she's not totally what you might call a compatible--
managers:
	bearded  things my vantage point allows me to see, that the real -world station managers may miss. each month i send them a letter with my findings!
managing:
	perry  frankly, managing to give a hundred percent would be miraculous, as i always reserve a handful of percents for basic personal use.
manatees:
	hap it looks like the flesh of my chest is ripped back and inside my body there is a tiny dinosaur working a series of levers to control me  down one arm there's an army of manatees mounting to stage a coup and take control of the me-throne  down the other arm is the rival army of dinosaurs but they are actually being driven by butterflies in hive-mind mode  climbing up my back there's like a silhouette of myself but it's as if i'm climbing the mountain of me to get my soul back from the dinosaur in my ribcage  and i'm being chased by this fast-growing fungus that is turning my body to mushrooms as it creeps up from my crack
mancer:
	your title is "the { chrono, neuro, aero, cosmo, reve, necro, cyber, astro, psycho, steam, meta, black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, war} s."
mandarin:
	john dare i ask why? / maggie i was just thinking...the millie spangler type is big into teaching babies mandarin, so they can compete in the future global economy.
mandated:
	363363;  joy is mandated
mandatory:
	desmond my first project will be refurb'ing the pond to feature waterproof, motion-activated bread-crumb dispensers.  these will work in concert with a mandatory neighborhood old-muffin recycling program.
mane:
	rub her down each evening with a mitt hand-knit from the hairs of her own mane?
mangle:
	- 'scream car elephant young be much mangle.'  man, someone screwed up in the translation department.
mangled:
	a mangled monsarto
mangler:
	the mangler. should your handicrafts call for fresh bone marrow, this bench-mounted device will extract it speedily.  why pay more for store-bought?  fresh is unmatched for flavor.  $3.50
mangy:
	what could we have done with a mangy old cow that we couldn't have done a hundred times over with a giant's giant cow?
manhood:
	winifred each day we look forward to your charming humor.  you are a paragon of manhood.
maniac:
	amos that maniac jumped me in an alley, beat me senseless...tied me up and left me, passed out, bleeding!
manifest:
	hulda don't be gross.  can you please make a mr. goodbar manifest itself out of thin air?  please?  for me?
manipulate:
	clara and the dvds, and workshops, and seminars...as you know, it's much easier to manipulate the public than the stock market.
manly:
	- ‹ber-manly!
mannheim:
	lucy the mannheim steamroller lobby thanks the people of america.  democracy works!
mantel:
	633633;  the mantel is getting cluttered
mantelpiece:
	a bearded man in a suit resting on a fireplace's mantelpiece with his back turned.  there is a woman sitting in a chair, we see her profile.  the two are looking at each other.
manufactured:
	coal in the home. the family in question had attached turbine-boilers to every device in the home toasters, refrigerators, can-openers &c. what reports fail to mention is that the lady of the house works in a factory where the small boilers are manufactured. she acquires them at a steep discount. this is clearly out of range for the average family.
manufacturing:
	alejandro oh?  you've also cut out plastics?  every year in this country, plastic manufacturing uses three times as much petroleum as vehicle-fuel refining.
manure:
	spencer i sprinkled manure on that carpet every week for you!
mapping:
	brad (staring at a map with a route marked on it) almost done mapping the route.
mar:
	riding a bird, rick flies towards elspeth.  he tows a huge banner on which is written will you mar--
marbled:
	tiger  soft.  heavily marbled.  slightly nutty with a hint of old rum.
marbles:
	all right.  marbles?
marchmas:
	 she will not be putting the snowman decorations back in the yard for marchmas.
marcie:
	247247;  marcie melts
margarine:
	traces of...expired margarine.  wet animal.  misery.
margaritas:
	ms. morton unless i'm mistaken, senator, you served quite a few margaritas at your fund-raisers.  went over well, did they?  now you need to do something for us.
marge:
	lucky marge i don't want my beef cooked so much as run through a warm room.
marginalized:
	dr. helfsquiggle are you kidding?  "every rose" basically defined a marginalized generation.  it was like my anthem senior year.
marginally:
	they are acquaintances i am trying to get in good with so they will recommend me for an opening at their company.  a position which will be marginally less maddening than working for y--
marinating:
	thelma  of course you don't!  you're marinating in it.  you're numb to it.
marine:
	dawn too late!  we've moved on to the oil spill in the gulf of mexico!  it's so tragic it makes hamlet look like 3-2-1 contact!  it's the worst marine disaster since noah's flood!  everyone is very concerned!  brow-furrowing is at an all-time high!
marionette:
	terry check out my awesome new marionette! completely lifelike.  fully articulated.  accurate joint physics.
marketed:
	main panel you've been marketed to!  some douche sent an intrusion using marketing  we don't believe you've seen enough commercial messages today!  we firmly believe that web content should serve no greater purpose than to attract eyeballs that we can cram full of ads.  and since you've already proven you're dumb enough to spend a dollar on an imaginary "gift," why shouldn't we press our luck?  we know that garish, omni-present ads eventually drove you away from myspace, but we figure we can get a good six months' worth of impressions out of you before you get fed up with us, too!
marketplace:
	marketplace
markets:
	donny last year, your brother sacrificed himself to save the planet. / thank god he was able to destroy the alien robots controlling our lending markets and restore the world to prosperity!
markup:
	 i had them printed at kinko's, so, you know, not actually that much of a markup
marooned:
	marooned day 2
marriages:
	 feelings were hurt.  marriages were ruined.  at least one car was totaled.  and now finally we can do this right.
marrow:
	the mangler. should your handicrafts call for fresh bone marrow, this bench-mounted device will extract it speedily.  why pay more for store-bought?  fresh is unmatched for flavor.  $3.50
marrying:
	in the late 19th century a female lowlands gorilla known as "lady millicent" went from the royal zoo to become the toast of high society before marrying a belgian aristocrat for whom she bore many children.
marshmallows:
	 basically i am looking for someone who thinks it is perfectly acceptable to eat an entire 5 lb bag of marshmallows in 13 minutes
martial:
	talosian ...it was thought the fiction of a court-martial would prevent you from too soon regaining control of your vessel.
martians:
	- barry, you can't sell water balloons to the martians.
marxism:
	fur collar  yeah, okay, i'm a dumbass. how's marxism working out for you these days?
marzipan:
	santa santa is very concerned with your cellulose intake!  it's how he tracks you!  i've also brought some pickled marzipan!  its horridness will stimulate your bile ducts and make you smell less appetizing to the stingroaches i have also brought you.  you should start taking their venom in small doses now, while you are still larval.  be cautious!  they are not tame.
mash:
	foster  will you hand-mash her special imported oatmeal?
masochists:
	a kind of poncho is shown. gossamer waterproof garments. get the genuine! beware of worthless imitations! rival garments are made of acid-treated poison cloth. ours are safe and nurturing to your babylike skin. don't you deserve not to have your skin corroded off by the competition? masochists need not respond. we don't want your business. this is a nice place. gossamer clothing co, 28 devonshire st., boston, ma.
mastered:
	anton think of it this way.  in an infinite theoretical future, we've mastered time travel a million times over, right?  that means than an infinite number of time travelers have already come back to fix everything that needed fixing.  they've created the best possible universe for us!  anything bad that still happens must have been a compromise to prevent something even worse.
masterpiece:
	  anyone can manage one masterpiece.
masterpieces:
	phoebe  for i'll reveal the strange principles i live by!  i'll make cryptic references to half-completed masterpieces!
masterwork:
	 i can only hope that my masterwork will be realized by the lexical might of future generations.
masthead:
	front page of the masthead herald, many years later.
mate:
	later maggie millie!  how are you?  how's the baby? / millie just wonderful!  we've been teaching him lingala, so he'll be uniquely qualified to do humanitarian work in the congo. / maggie but... / millie check and mate
materal:
	 suggestive materal at 
material:
	you mean you're okay with intense sequences of violent action; liberal use of profanity, suggestive material, and drug references; and exactly one occurence of the "f" word?
mates:
	 omg you were conceived during a waxing gibbous whale migration too?? soul mates
mathematical:
	ken [narrating an illustrated mathematical formula] if you spend eight bucks and the haircut looks good for two weeks, that cut has a haircut value index of point five seven.
mathematically:
	man #1 they fired my entire data-analysis team and replaced them with day laborers from outside home depot. it is now mathematically impossible to accomplish anything at work.
mathematician:
	ken i take pride in my haircuts!  i want to get good value from them!  i'm not a mathematician, robert!  i barely an aesthetician.  but now i'm ruining people's lives!  i inverted a fraction and people are dying.  they're dying in the streets!  i don't know how to stop it!  i don't know how to make it right!
mattresses:
	do you sleep on the most comfortable mattress in the world? of course you do not. the most comfortable mattress in the world is owned by an italian stockbroker. but we saw it in a magazine and modeled ours after what it is probably like. still most likely a step up for you. mattresses & meat
mature:
	anastasia nobody's ever satisfied with their own work.  nobody mature, anyway.  you're not some freakish aberration, you're just normal.
matzoh:
	176176;  satan enjoys matzoh
maul:
	- fool, you better hope that i maul worse than i woo.
maverick:
	 mccain calls himself a 'maverick,' but mckinley beat him to the patronymic particle by over 100 years.
maves:
	 on the misty mores of misenmarch the mimsy maves be mired
mavis:
	gibson girl  ...next on our campus tour, we'll visit the mavis p. johnson learning center.
maximum:
	wolf all you'll have to do for maximum reward is recruit four more wolves under you-
mayan:
	no, please, i swear, i use the mayan calendar
mccain:
	 mccain calls himself a 'maverick,' but mckinley beat him to the patronymic particle by over 100 years.
mcdork:
	nelson (interrupting and looking the other way)  hey scrooge mcdork!  nothing in your life will turn out as well as you think it ought to!
mcgnty:
	prof. mcgnty  looks like the ol' cooking robot still has a few bugs left in his programming!
mckinley:
	 mccain calls himself a 'maverick,' but mckinley beat him to the patronymic particle by over 100 years.
mcmurhpy:
	mcmurhpy makin' some hot pockets, you gonna want any?
mcmurphy:
	mcmurphy so what.  everything's got sodium in it.  same way they add fluoride to water.  
meal:
	2. in the seventh grade, i invented a new eating utensil called the "clingting." i ate every meal with it for four and a half years.  it involved magnets.
meanest:
	he's the meanest goblin around!  the scariest monster in the whole world!
meaningless:
	moppet  'march 18  trying to raise this child is the most meaningless task i have ever attempted.'
measured:
	634634; accomplishment measured in decibels
measures:
	  take measures 
meats:
	- thanks, but i can't take all the credit... i've been ordering specialty meats based on some suggestions i got on the internet. who would have thought strangers would be so helpful?
meaty:
	 meaty goodness 
mech:
	your title is "the { chrono, neuro, aero, cosmo, reve, necro, cyber, astro, psycho, steam, meta, black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, war} s."
mechanically:
	cynthia (said mechanically) fweep?
meddle:
	a newspaper-style block of text reads "let us meddle." a rallying cry for a generation.
mediation:
	edwin no, i thought she would reciprocate by getting me a darth vader mediation egg for the living room.
medicate:
	the first guy nuts!  i forgot to medicate myself at noon.  what time is it now?
mediocrities:
	katie so if we feed the system visionaries, and it spits them out as mediocrities...then what we need is some sort of extreme double mega-visionary who'll get worn down to the level of 'visionary.'
mediterreanean:
	stavros  for me it would be mediterreanean olives, yougurts, figs and dates!
meeeeee:
	frans i need hugs my hug meter is so low looooove meeeeee
meekly:
	billy meekly i just have nothing to do
meerschaum:
	vanity fair. for meerschaum and cigarettes. does not bite the tongue. listen, let's not beat around the bush. you want some primo cigarettes, right? but why - what's the big deal? is it just flavor? that's very subjective. no. you want to look cool. so shut up and grab one of our cigarettes. it's made of bomber-jacket leather. there is nothing cooler in the world. the best. bomber cigs - so good - so bad
mega:
	katie so if we feed the system visionaries, and it spits them out as mediocrities...then what we need is some sort of extreme double mega-visionary who'll get worn down to the level of 'visionary.'
megalomaniacal:
	which spurs him into conflict with { a megalomaniacal dictator, a government conspiracy, a profit-obsessed corporation, a sneering wizard, supernatural monsters, computer viruses made real, murderous robots, an army led by a sadist, forces that encourage conformity, a charismatic politician on the rise, humanity's selfish nature, his own insecurity vis-a-vis girls
megamax:
	ross that's why you need new gullible megamax.  it puts an immediate end to problems.
megaphone:
	  i hear the rival bar across the street offers a crazy discount if you stand in front of their door shouting at passersby with a megaphone.
megastores:
	- hey, when did macduff's corner bookshop become a borders? / i hate it when little mom-n-pop places get bought out by corporate megastores.
mellow:
	rocky eh, pretty mellow.
melodious:
	newscaster walt hoppendorf's melodious voice comes over the telegrameutophium.
melons:
	first  so i ask him, calmly, "is it a real fruit plate, or is it just melons?"  you know how they do.
melting:
	she is melting, and quite visibly at that
melts:
	247247;  marcie melts
memes:
	old man mohan (a cheery banjo player) tired of ninja monkey robots fighting zombie pirate jesus?  so's everybody!  that's why we've compiled, for handy reference, next year's memes!  get a head start!
memorialize:
	 kenmore erects giant fridge to memorialize him, self-promote
mending:
	liz do you want this soup?  is fifty dollar and include mending, re-sole of shoes
mentioning:
	woman  everyone's talking about how these things should have been *predicted*, should have been *stopped*.  seems so obvious in hindsight.  so what regulations are going unenforced *right this second*?  what abuses are people *noticing* but not mentioning?  what crises yet to come are still *preventable*?
meow:
	girl i wish i knew what you cats say to each other when you meow like that.
mercenary:
	a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild ocd, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert
merchants:
	caption toiletries merchants
mercutio:
	 you should hear how he went on when he met the new mailroom guy, abernathy mercutio hoakes-waddleswourthe iv
mere:
	 we mere fooles delight in bringing whimsy and magic to the aagggkkkk
merge:
	instructions lean back * relax your eyes * let these dots merge
meringue:
	- pie! i demand pie! key lime! banana cream! cherry, apple, or meringue!
merits:
	094094;  relative merits are weighed
mermaid:
	interior we see that fiona is a mermaid in a bathtub, talking to greg
merraka:
	woman 2 ayplej ahleejanz tooda flahg uvdaa yooneye teydstay tsava merraka
messageboard:
	marcus mo-om!  he called me names on a messageboard!  he compared me to hitler!  i've spent all morning composing my scathing reply
messages:
	main panel you've been marketed to!  some douche sent an intrusion using marketing  we don't believe you've seen enough commercial messages today!  we firmly believe that web content should serve no greater purpose than to attract eyeballs that we can cram full of ads.  and since you've already proven you're dumb enough to spend a dollar on an imaginary "gift," why shouldn't we press our luck?  we know that garish, omni-present ads eventually drove you away from myspace, but we figure we can get a good six months' worth of impressions out of you before you get fed up with us, too!
messenger:
	dan well, let's see.  i outlined my next couple projects, set up a filing system for my notes, and downloaded a productivity program...then i read an article about time management and filed it away in the new system...then brainstormed over instant-messenger for a while, while watching youtube clips for "inspiration."
messes:
	john and doesn't having fielders convey a lack of confidence in the pitcher?  "we really don't think you can throw a no-hitter, so we put eight other guys out there to clean up your messes."  "don't try hard or anything."  oh and hey, what if the pitcher started using a tennis ball?  just like whipped it out?  you think anyone'd notice?
metallic:
	robot shaver.  children and animals are not allowed in most robot competitions.  hide your treachery with this shaver - removes hair and imparts a waxy, metallic sheen.  $2.00
metaphorically:
	that way i leave the scientists scratching their heads - "well, he ate twenty pounds of cucumbers every day for ten years, then died of this previously unknown liver disease." eat that, scientists! metaphorically, of course.
metaphysics:
	a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild ocd, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert
meted:
	029029;  punishment is meted out
meteor:
	 cell phone lines were jammed.  everyone was so busy fielding concerned calls from out-of-state relatives that they didn't notice the giant meteor oh noooooooo
meters:
	inventor friction-recapturing inner flywheel. water-resistant to 18 meters. sixty-seven individual servomotors. bluetooth built into the heel.
methane:
	offpanel voice  ...have developed a way to reprocess cow methane into jet fuel.
metropolitan:
	sylvie i sold ballpoint pens door-to-door from my nash metropolitan
metroville:
	"dirty legs" mackay after two innings, the score is four-one, metroville.
mewling:
	radio we are a mewling kitten, in need of its mother's teat.
miasma:
	todd has donned a surgical cap and mask.  he stands over a table on which a baby lies.  he scowls and a foul miasma of disgust emanates from his head.
michaels:
	dr. helfsquiggle totally!  bret michaels basically raised me.  through the tape player in my camaro.  oh!  and i'm pretty sure the lyrics for "ride the wind" were at least partially inspired by one of my fan letters.
michelangelo:
	 and even michelangelo had assistants!
michele:
	michele  do you have a second for the environment?
microeconomy:
	 if the financial institutions are ever to recognize our independent sustainable microeconomy we must continue to wage our passive-aggressive awareness campaign.
micrometer:
	greg let's say there's an expansion bay on my phone.  i can buy third-party modules specific to my needs.  maybe i want a digital tape measure and a level.  maybe i want a micrometer or a magnifier.  sometimes these are things i have to carry with me.  why can't they be on my phone, linked to the processor and the camera and the bluetooth chip?  i could turn my phone into a scanner or a nutritional scale or camera binoculars or fishing radar.  my examples aren't that broad-reaching, but if it's open-source then any tool a sufficiently nerdy subculture can't live without, they'll develop for themselves.  whaddya think?  good idea, huh?
microscope:
	george washington and? did you know there are over six octillion processes happening in your body every second? if i had an electron microscope i could tell 'em thanks! thanks for all the hard work! but i don't. cuz of martha.
middleweight:
	 josh was middleweight boxing champ in nazareth in 8th grade. not many people know that
midianites:
	suited man with beard the israelites farted in the monkey of the lord, and he snuggled them into the uvula of the midianites.
midst:
	a woman approaches another woman, sitting on a porch stoop in the midst of a snowstorm.
midwestern:
	- got some nice midwestern brown, think i still got some cornys left too.
migration:
	 omg you were conceived during a waxing gibbous whale migration too?? soul mates
mildew:
	chet  ooh, that's a health hazard.  wet cloth will mildew pretty quick.
mileage:
	- this one gets great mileage... it runs on "wood gas," meaning any organic fuel.
milieu:
	fur collar  the recontextualization of not just disposable but disposed of victorian imagery in the milieu of 21st century web-based publication and distribution is a baldly ironic statement of luddite intransigence, but with a humanizing layer of nostalgia and longing for vanished standards of craftsmanship and civility
milled:
	lara i grew my own wheat.  milled the flour with a stone dug up from my yard.  built the oven out of bricks i sculpted myself.  even evolved a chicken out of a salamander to get eggs.
millennia:
	over the millennia, your family thrived on this food.  your tribe and your clan adapted to it.
miller:
	francine (sings)  jim miller's discount isuzu! check us ooout on yelp.
millicent:
	in the late 19th century a female lowlands gorilla known as "lady millicent" went from the royal zoo to become the toast of high society before marrying a belgian aristocrat for whom she bore many children.
milling:
	by noon his entire debtor roster is casually milling around his house, hoping to "accidentally" encounter him before he has an aneurysm.
millionaires:
	- did you know that a whopping 47 percent of members of congress are millionaires?
mills:
	woman we have established a wintergreen napkin palette.  these turquoise pepper mills you found suggest a fundamentally southwestern character.
milquetoast:
	a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild ocd, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert
mimsy:
	 on the misty mores of misenmarch the mimsy maves be mired
minder:
	girl in my class you'll find three astronauts, a couple firefighters, a bunch of baseball players and rock stars, and one cow minder.
minding:
	eleanor i was minding my own business in my own house!  i resent having to defend myself against this pitch!
minds:
	fat  the japanese in world war ii were determined to fight to the very last man.  that was their battle plan!  took a couple of bombs, but we changed their minds.  i think these iraqis don't have half the resolve we think they do.
mineral:
	nelson  i have a nutritional deficiency.  i must supplement my diet with a rare mineral found only in human suffering.
minerals:
	 optionally, they can be prepared drizzled with artisanal peppercorn shavings, or sprinkled with crushed crystalline minerals.  zagat take notice
minestrone:
	starting with the crab cake sampler.  then minestrone and broccoli cheese soup, a bowl and a cup respectively.
minimizing:
	nice  well, first i acknowledge their experience, rather than minimizing or dismissing it. most people just want to be heard. i listen to them, and they calm down.
minimum:
	the circuses are up to a three-head minimum.
mining:
	eustace now, i'm no mining expert, of course, but here in the studio we had a thought...
minority:
	the prosecutor dropped the charges under mysterious circumstances.  why you trying to disenfranchise his minority?
minstrelcy:
	desmond  duck duck goose is offensive minstrelcy!
minus:
	cashier well, without a receipt the best i can give you is store credit, minus a restocking fee. 
minuscule:
	 you see- the elementary nuances of our physical makeup are immeasurably minuscule squares which are called--
miracle:
	jack yes.  it's a miracle.  everything is going to be all right.
miraculous:
	perry  frankly, managing to give a hundred percent would be miraculous, as i always reserve a handful of percents for basic personal use.
mired:
	 on the misty mores of misenmarch the mimsy maves be mired
mirroring:
	hatless even did that "mirroring" thing with body language to build rapport!
misadventure:
	 he had also wrapped himself in a bath towel but that had somehow fallen into the toilet and clogged it.  oh i'm sorry am i disgusting you with tales of your grandfather's toilet misadventure, children??
misanthrope:
	 i have been a misanthrope a long time. i have this down.
misappropriating:
	garth oh, baby!  are you sure that's safe?  there was that whole scandal where the commissioner of the high-speed snooze association was forced to resign after misappropriating $3.8 million congressionally earmarked for snuggle development!
misbehavior:
	ariel misbehavior has become his palette, our apartment his canvas, in a grand, grotesque installation - featuring us as predictable foils, our fury as much a deliberate part of the work as each precisely-browned fiber of shag.  more than a simple befoulment - this is a befoulment of order, a metaphorical poop-smear on the very notion of animal subjugation.
miscellaneous:
	miscellaneous parts are life. i'm keeping that because i will need it someday. last time i threw something out, i needed it the very next day.
mischievous:
	king the bylaws of our experimental agrarian city-state expressly prohibit mischievous tampering with the natural order of living things!
misdeeds:
	 through the quiet crackle of cooling embers she thought she almost heard him weeping. but it was probably just a faint hiss of steam, or else the wind, or else the sorrowful ghosts of her long year full of many purposeful misdeeds
misenmarch:
	 on the misty mores of misenmarch the mimsy maves be mired
misformed:
	reg  i can't compete with you folks!  weirdest thing that ever happened to me down at the factory was a guy ratted me out for pocketing misformed o-rings off the line an' takin' 'em home for "illicit purposes."
misguided:
	ernestina but that's the problem! the enthusiasm is only good for about a day. so you can wait it out until it joins the interminable list of "good ideas you'll never do" - or you can just spend that energy. dive in. just try something. / better to do something with passion that turns out misguided, than carefully decide to do nothing at all. 
mishaps:
	 this should prevent any more mishaps
misinterpreted:
	121121;  signals are misinterpreted
misleading:
	reginald  ah.  i see.  the brochure was misleading.
misquoted:
	249249;  borat is misquoted
misread:
	angry  ...and then i misread my ticket! because of the way it was printed! this is everyone's fault but mine!
misshapen:
	from now on, when you feel my itsy bitsy butt muscles clench atop the mound of your misshapen hump, that, my friend, is when you do not drop me
missile:
	dawn too late!  old news!  health care is the biggest problem facing our society since dukakis rode a tank!  grave pronouncements are hitting the media at rates unseen since the cuban missile crisis!
missiles:
	man 2 they're launching missiles at the sun in angry retaliation.
mission:
	i was sent on a research mission into the past, but my chronoship has broken down!
misspelled:
	 and by the way, your diary entry from last thursday misspelled 'ingratiating!'
misstep:
	 david malki ! is not an easy man to know. he's like ... like a row which has been filled completely save for a 3 and a 7, but there is not enough information in the surrounding grid to determine which digit should go  box, a delicate state  a single misstep could lead to further erroneous assumptions, compounding upon itself until the entire puzzle is rendered unsalvageable. sometimes i suspect he doesn't even *like* sudoku.
missy:
	missy how'd arthur handle the big 4-0?
mistake:
	- the water that scientists have found on mars has been gone for millions of years. also, you appear to be making condoms by mistake.
mistakes:
	white  wrongs were done. mistakes were made. but that was generations ago - you can't hold all white people responsible.
mistakovich:
	moppet  i'm referred to as 'that wailing she-demon' or 'poopy mcpoop-maker' or 'regretty mistakovich'.  didn't you like me?
mistresses:
	candidate i promise you, the media will have to work overtime to keep up with my illicit shenanigans. mistresses. bribery. indictments 24/7.
misty:
	 on the misty mores of misenmarch the mimsy maves be mired
misunderstand:
	elle no, you misunderstand.
misunderstanding:
	todd well, i'm sorry.  you'll just have to take it up with my accountant. / she handles all of my financial matters.  i'm sure it's just a minor misunderstanding.
mitt:
	rub her down each evening with a mitt hand-knit from the hairs of her own mane?
mixture:
	gene next on our tour of the lucky charms factory - this is the press where we get our marshmallow mixture.
miz:
	marvin please, miz dunlap, you are yelling at the world's most broken man
mizike:
	mykelle, aka mizike  but everybody's getting their skull drilled out and filled with expansion foam!  it means you're not a dweeborg!
mm:
	wo  mm-hmm.
mmeeeeeooowwwrrrr:
	<<mmeeeeeooowwwrrrr>>
mmmellllltiiiinnnnngggggg:
	woman i'm mmmellllltiiiinnnnngggggg...
mmmyes:
	gax mmmyes.
mmrf:
	patient [with a bamboo branch in his mouth] mmrf?
mo:
	marcus mo-om!  he called me names on a messageboard!  he compared me to hitler!  i've spent all morning composing my scathing reply
moan:
	you can cling to it, and nine years from now when somebody else comes up with it independently, moan that it was your idea.
moaning:
	sick  by day, i lay on the ground moaning and rocking in agony... by night, i stared at the ceiling, willing sleep to come, begging some spirit of rest to glance over my shattered body and, sighing, say "i'll take him." after hours of this i would look at the clock and realize only minutes had passed. time had lifted its foot from the accelerator and was slowly coasting to a stop. i would be trapped in that pain for a hundred thousand years.
mocha:
	darrell iced decaf grande raspberry soy no-whip light-ice mocha!
mock:
	 we mock the rich but really, they are better than us
mocked:
	059059;  an honest effort is mocked
mode:
	hap it looks like the flesh of my chest is ripped back and inside my body there is a tiny dinosaur working a series of levers to control me  down one arm there's an army of manatees mounting to stage a coup and take control of the me-throne  down the other arm is the rival army of dinosaurs but they are actually being driven by butterflies in hive-mind mode  climbing up my back there's like a silhouette of myself but it's as if i'm climbing the mountain of me to get my soul back from the dinosaur in my ribcage  and i'm being chased by this fast-growing fungus that is turning my body to mushrooms as it creeps up from my crack
modeled:
	do you sleep on the most comfortable mattress in the world? of course you do not. the most comfortable mattress in the world is owned by an italian stockbroker. but we saw it in a magazine and modeled ours after what it is probably like. still most likely a step up for you. mattresses & meat
modeling:
	you're a natural.  i love it.  you're gonna be huge in modeling!  everyone will want a piece of the new dog on the scene!
moderate:
	start - time a weekend - difficulty moderate
modesty:
	- as you can see, our portable device saves the patient the embarassment and awkwardness of the traditional stirrups and speculum. - i'll begin the exam by inserting a small amount of lubricating paste to help her open and allow light in. - gee! - nurse, please bring in a dose of gyno-paste. (my own formula.) - you may experience some slight discomfort. - hope you're not allergic to peanut butter.  get a clue at   modesty, chastity, virtue
modifications:
	coal-powered vehicles. it also turns out that the man of the house is an auto mechanic specializing in absurd "pimptastic" modifications! this is hardly repeatable.
modular:
	for example, the janice s. byerton arts & letters module, the lawrence n. sanders module for music, the chester & doris codberg module for the study of modular education.
mohan:
	old man mohan (a cheery banjo player) tired of ninja monkey robots fighting zombie pirate jesus?  so's everybody!  that's why we've compiled, for handy reference, next year's memes!  get a head start!
molded:
	terry "i even got so far as taking the test.  but it turns out i don't have any taste buds."  "i am made of injection-molded plastic slapped with acrylic paint and cheap decals to appear alive."
moldering:
	otto or do the oldest dollars get spent first?  keep them from moldering?   case that first dollar must be super-long-gone.  not much i can do about it now.
molding:
	a squareish design is shown, divided into parts, that say "carpet," "wood," "c8, ny," and "621 b'way." parquet and inlaid floors, borders for rugs, baseboards, decks, crown molding, doors, anything wood feeds our weird fetish.
molecules:
	 recognizable smells are specific combinations of airborne molecules called odorants. odorants are chemical vapors which must permeate a mucous membrane to bond with olfactory receptors.
molehair:
	dorothy thanks!  they're molehair - we actually stuff them here at home!
molten:
	in the soap processing plant, the contaminants become clear molten soap is being poured through a gleeful man's crack on its way to becoming new bars
momentarily:
	mack  once lightning hits our rod, the charge will travel down the copper gutters, superheat the doorknob assembly, and momentarily soften the deadbolt enough for me to batter the door open.
momma:
	at yo momma's.
moms:
	sheldon as as for being socially maladjusted - well, guilty.  but doesn't everyone have some sort of neurosis?  better a little shy than, say, obsessed with celebrity, or addicted to drugs, or running around murdering people with axes.  really, you talk about socially awkward virgins living in their moms' basements - you're talking about serial killers.
mondays:
	garfield i hate mondays / goku then we must destroy them rrrraaaaarrrgh
moneymaking:
	evan the perfect moneymaking scheme!
monkeys:
	woman you know what, though? probably doesn't mean anything to them. if you've been saying "monkey box" all your life, it doesn't mean a box of monkeys. it's just syllables.
monocled:
	gianni (a monocled gentleman) i'm going outside for some fresh air.
monocles:
	booth now wears both top hats and both monocles.
monopoly:
	hastings has stabbed rich uncle pennybags (the monopoly guy) and snatched his wallet.  eli is appalled.
mons:
	 the waiter pronounced it 'sall-mons'
monumental:
	 this is a monumental step for you. thank you for offering yourself up to me.
moondial:
	moondial.  the best tool yet invented to ensure marital harmony.  gentlemen, hide this in the back yard and see on which days you should keep your fat mouth shut.  $5.25
mooommm:
	samantha  mooommm whyyyy
mooon:
	 mooon 
moooooon:
	moon moooooon
moore:
	mother  really.  clement moore invented the whole brood.
moot:
	then health care becomes a moot point!
mop:
	mop to the crotch!
mopey:
	nah, being broke all of a sudden has still got me all mopey.
morale:
	plus, for many of them, it's their first christmas away from their families.  it's rough on morale, sir.
mores:
	 on the misty mores of misenmarch the mimsy maves be mired
morph:
	helen i don't know, why can't you just shapeshfit your pancreas back into health?  morph those cells around until it works again?
morphine:
	chuck  a long life of what?  diabetes?  wasting away to nothing as modern medicine pumps morphine into an ever-hollowing shell of what once was my life?
morphs:
	the valkyrie morphs into a gaxian.
mortar:
	matt listen, my crew worked very hard!  i personally oversaw the preparation of the mortar!  we even weighed each brick to make sure none of them were hollow for some reason!
mortified:
	i'll be mortified!
mos:
	barbara a load o' rubbish mos' likely.  all fulla monsters what never existed an' other lies similar.
moses:
	woman at left, behind gax, looks on disapprovingly,eyebrows slightly raised, her eyes fixed on the aliens as she hears his reaction.  gax, just left of center, holding his walking stick in his right hand like moses' rod, does not appear any too enthused to see the aliens.  on the right, the two aliens, with bodies like plucked uncooked chickens except with armlike appendages instead of wings, ending in two grotesque long ced fingers, stare fixedly up at gax as he makes his pronouncement.  the bulging eyes of one show dismay; the other looks shocked or startled.
motherlode:
	scrib b it's the prop motherlode / wondermark barrel <<bweep>> / scrib a we should visit neighbors more often / wondermark  cad!  you presume!
motion:
	desmond my first project will be refurb'ing the pond to feature waterproof, motion-activated bread-crumb dispensers.  these will work in concert with a mandatory neighborhood old-muffin recycling program.
motive:
	hugo brilliant!  but why?  what would his motive be?
motives:
	barbara ain't no such animal in life.  dragon's an easy villain.  all hoarding gold an' breathing flames-like.  strength of a lion with motives of a man.  no such beast in creation!
motor:
	simon have you ever actually used plaque-vac?  my aunt gave me one for christmas.  the suction motor is really cheap, so you either have to go super slowly and hit a bunch of spots twice, or just brush your teeth the regular way afterwards.  it doesn't really save you any time.
motto:
	 class motto is 'try it, let's see what you got'
mounting:
	hap it looks like the flesh of my chest is ripped back and inside my body there is a tiny dinosaur working a series of levers to control me  down one arm there's an army of manatees mounting to stage a coup and take control of the me-throne  down the other arm is the rival army of dinosaurs but they are actually being driven by butterflies in hive-mind mode  climbing up my back there's like a silhouette of myself but it's as if i'm climbing the mountain of me to get my soul back from the dinosaur in my ribcage  and i'm being chased by this fast-growing fungus that is turning my body to mushrooms as it creeps up from my crack
mournfully:
	a woman comforts the man as he rests his head in his hands mournfully.
moustaches:
	everyone except guys with moustaches excepted
mousy:
	with the help of a { sarcastic female techno-geek, tomboyish female mechanic, shape-shifting female assassin, leather-clad female in shades, girl who's always loved him, bookish female scholar with mousy brown hair, cherubic girl with pigtails and spunk, female who inexplicably becomes attracted to the damaged protagonist for unstated reasons
mouthed:
	text he lured a baby off a cliff and waited open-mouthed for it
mouthful:
	simon this morning i became the first person in history to chew a single mouthful of oatmeal 3,290 times in my kitchen.  first in history.
mouths:
	culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.
mouthwash:
	 you've been socially conditioned by mouthwash commercials to believe that mint equals clean.  but really, you're just trading one food smell for another!
movin:
	jake  great for movin' around town!
mp3s:
	"he's got a music-review tumblr full of sick mp3s, and he self-published a kindle book of paranormal post-apocalyptic erotica."
mrmff:
	- mrmff.
ms:
	ms. morton unless i'm mistaken, senator, you served quite a few margaritas at your fund-raisers.  went over well, did they?  now you need to do something for us.
mucous:
	 recognizable smells are specific combinations of airborne molecules called odorants. odorants are chemical vapors which must permeate a mucous membrane to bond with olfactory receptors.
muddy:
	james i- i was playing with my truck?  a-and it fell into a puddle and got muddy?  why do these things happen, daddy?  why is the world full of misery?
muffle:
	skip nothing worse, right?  cramped space, uncomfortable seats, and some little rugrat just screaming bloody murder like it's a washcloth being wrung out.   well, my invention is a special hood that fits securely around the baby's upper region to effectively muffle any disruptive noises that might disturb fellow passengers.
muffler:
	what a crazy year it's been!  at ace we've had some real challenges.  bill, our muffler expert, suffered a hernia while lifting a catalytic converter--right during our busy "may is for mufflers" promotion!  but we still managed to set a sales record that big al...(cut off)...will be proud of.  our office...
mufflers:
	what a crazy year it's been!  at ace we've had some real challenges.  bill, our muffler expert, suffered a hernia while lifting a catalytic converter--right during our busy "may is for mufflers" promotion!  but we still managed to set a sales record that big al...(cut off)...will be proud of.  our office...
muggy:
	man 1 always really muggy this time of year.
mujahideen:
	luxembourg  remember how, when russia was crashing at afghanistan's place, you funneled weapons to the mujahideen to drive him out?
mulcahey:
	- i'll call father mulcahey. you fetch the ax!
mules:
	i don't want drug mules in my house.
multinational:
	arvid either my identical twin brother - with whom i share a strange and unexplained psychic bond - is about to come to severe physical harm or my massive multinational organization is about to have its global strategy dictated by the signers of an internet petition!
multiplier:
	jimbo listen, '5.  you think you could do me a solid on this?  we'd put you right up front on a major invoice.  yeah.  unit price.  you'd be a multiplier.  big job.  that's why i called you.  thanks, '5.  you're a pro.  i'll dial you in.  see you in excel.
multipliers:
	born on multipliers (4/22; 6/23; 7/17; etc); no effect
mum:
	vittorio jennifer!  didn't mum tell you not to play with that?
munchkin:
	- in 1882 while vacationing abroad, lord alistair bludd-smythe invented the "blumpkin", the "rusty steamer", the "dirty sanchez", the "steaming dragon", and the "grumpy munchkin", all which remain popular to this very day!
mundane:
	johnson and since the alternative is this mundane world you seem to cherish so much - well, frankly, it's a wonder i ever get out of bed at all.
murders:
	 a horse that murders a man will be shot!
muscle:
	farmer reggie halloween has gotten too corporate!  big candy pushes its sugar-laden garbage as the only sensible choice to razor-bladed apples!  another example of big business using its marketing muscle to destroy the small entrepreneur!
muscles:
	from now on, when you feel my itsy bitsy butt muscles clench atop the mound of your misshapen hump, that, my friend, is when you do not drop me
muses:
	006006;  cindy muses on privacy
mushrooms:
	hap it looks like the flesh of my chest is ripped back and inside my body there is a tiny dinosaur working a series of levers to control me  down one arm there's an army of manatees mounting to stage a coup and take control of the me-throne  down the other arm is the rival army of dinosaurs but they are actually being driven by butterflies in hive-mind mode  climbing up my back there's like a silhouette of myself but it's as if i'm climbing the mountain of me to get my soul back from the dinosaur in my ribcage  and i'm being chased by this fast-growing fungus that is turning my body to mushrooms as it creeps up from my crack
mushy:
	679679; the ol' mushy headbutt
musing:
	677677, much musing about pumpkin
musky:
	 i have been told that my aura is quote-musky-unquote
muslims:
	 to muslims, any artistic depiction of a living thing is haraam
mustached:
	a mustached man sits at a dining table. his mother and father are there as well.
muttonchops:
	giacomo, wearing a wifebeater and jams, with shades and a box-fade (and muttonchops, an interesting addition), stands nearby as ross, sporting whitesnake hair and a giant clock on a chain around his neck, speaks about the enormous contraption at center.
mutual:
	fidelity mutual hath defiled themselves before me.  thou shalt put their executive board to the sword.
mutually:
	carlos greetings!  we are visitors from the planet mexico, many light-years away.  we have come in peace to establish friendly, mutually-beneficent relations.
mykelle:
	mykelle, aka mizike  but everybody's getting their skull drilled out and filled with expansion foam!  it means you're not a dweeborg!
myriad:
	will you do it, barnes?  will you adopt her for me?  and feed her, and brush her, and tend to her costly, myriad and unusual medical needs?
mysterious:
	the prosecutor dropped the charges under mysterious circumstances.  why you trying to disenfranchise his minority?
mythbusters:
	when in doubt, just ask yourself what would the mythbusters do?
mythical:
	and aspiring to some mythical "normality" is holding us back from dealing with our problems on their own terms.
mythos:
	 i'm incredibly curious to see how convoluted this santa mythos will get as they try to keep it plausible for ten more years.  will he eventually be cloned?  have sleeper cells across the world?  be revealed to be an alien?  who will tire of the ruse first??
myyerrwt:
	cat <<myyerrwt>>
nads:
	- yeah, totally creepy. so i chased him outside, and just as his eyes lit with hope, i kicked him in the nads in the parking lot.
nag:
	- man, finally some peace and quiet. i thought that nag would never leave. if i could feel my legs, this would be perfect.
nags:
	julio ...and another thing!  i hate how mary always nags me me to wax my head before church!  i'm all like, 'sweetie.  wax is expensive.  it's a recession."  and she's just all 'it's church.' / she just wants those ladies to see we can afford superfluous stuff like head-wax.  but we cannot.
nailed:
	- he killed all those children! and those he didn't kill, he maimed! and what about all the kittens he nailed to that fence?
nails:
	- may i say, madam, there are easier ways to dry your nails.
nap:
	- i just lay down for a nap. my head feels like a snail.
napkin:
	woman we have established a wintergreen napkin palette.  these turquoise pepper mills you found suggest a fundamentally southwestern character.
napoleon:
	man2 i gritted my teeth through napoleon dynamite. 
napping:
	- most of my complaints revolve around the security system no longer being of the "old man napping in chair" model.
naptime:
	 naptime all the time at 
narcissistic:
	i don't want him becoming some texting-crazed exhibitionist facebook-urchin with a narcissistic sense of entitlement!
narrate:
	amy  "although basic courtesy doesn't explain foreign genocide, highly-intuitive japanese kids let machines narrate old people's quiet recollections, seeking to ultimately vanquish wichita's xenophobic young zealots."
narrative:
	a different photo of a much older person, again with a top hat and a monocle over the right eye (based on context it can be assumed that, in terms of the narrative, this is the same person.)
narrow:
	dean an anteater actually, my proboscis allows me to reach into narrow openings to retrieve vari
nash:
	sylvie i sold ballpoint pens door-to-door from my nash metropolitan
natalie:
	609609;  natalie finds the fallacy
natives:
	the unhelpful natives 
naught:
	386386;  all comes to naught
nausea:
	050050;  nausea overtakes two
naut:
	your title is "the { chrono, neuro, aero, cosmo, reve, necro, cyber, astro, psycho, steam, meta, black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, war} s."
naysayer:
	- so, ah, rick? i don't mean to be a naysayer, i mean so far it's all gone just like you said...
nazareth:
	 josh was middleweight boxing champ in nazareth in 8th grade. not many people know that
ne:
	 oh! my angel of desire!  long have i caught my breath, ne'er daring hope that this day might come...
nearer:
	a girl is sitting on a bench, opposite a boy. behind the boy is a machine of some sort, and a wall on which are written numerous equations and formulas. a second girl is sitting nearer the machine.
nearest:
	"2. once your box is cut to size and sealed (as necessary), place your old project materials in the box. create dividers if desired. we recommend putting the oldest projects nearest the bottom to create a sort of strata of failure. that way you will not be too discouraged when you open the box; you will only see the birdhouse you failed to finish last week, rather than the solar-powered water-heater you discovered was way over your head three and a half years ago.*" "*for example."
nearing:
	lefty all right, men, listen good.  after six weeks at the oar, we're nearing the norman coast.  the next few days will be brutal and bloody for all of us.
nearsighted:
	man 1 off panel oh, yes. he's quite nearsighted. we got him some of those trendy black ones - they were on sale.
neat:
	 neat-o! what's my aura? what color am i?
neath:
	is welcome 'neath this roof
nebula:
	carlos behold our interstellar nebula cruiser!
necessities:
	wendy  you said to just pack the necessities!
necessity:
	 necessity is the mother of 
necks:
	two gaxians, sapient reptiles (human bodies with long necks and lizard heads), are outside a boarded-up building.  to the left is a sign with a banner attached.  the male gaxian sits dejectedly in a chair.
necro:
	your title is "the { chrono, neuro, aero, cosmo, reve, necro, cyber, astro, psycho, steam, meta, black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, war} s."
ned:
	samantha, overcome with emotion, collapses into ned's arms.  darren, concerned, takes her hand as helga stands by.
needing:
	teddy  so you're the ones at airports and sports arenas raking customers over the coals for needing to eat!
negating:
	hugo but whenever some external force, such as the state, commands us under penalty to to do or not do certain things - isn't that negating our personal choice to do or not do that thing?  in other words, removing our free will.  and isn't free will and moral agency the defining characteristic of humanity?  thus, i must reject any "law" that prescribes my actions as incompatible with my very nature as a reasoning being!
negativity:
	otto all our money has a history.  bribes paid to politicians...hush money paid to victims...drugs and even human beings bought and sold...that money makes its way into our banks.  it carries negativity with it.  someone's starting a business, or buying toys for their baby?  they don't want iran-contra money.  they want nice money.  money with positive energy.
neglect:
	446446;  a toy prevents against neglect
negotiate:
	 always lead high and negotiate down
negotiator:
	657657; the negotiator
neoplasm:
	man with monocle and top hat ...and the tumor was this big!  he literally only had seconds to live.  so, like any good doctor would, i pointed to the sky and yelled "hey, tumor, look at that" and then wrestled that damn neoplasm to the ground!  and...then...
nerdiest:
	sheldon are we still doing this?  seriously?  this stereotype is still clinging to life?  first, the "nerds are all frustrated virgins" thing.  some of the nerdiest people i know are highly sexual women.  and millions of nerds have spouses twice as nerdy as they are.  and the mom's basement thing?  the nerds i know live in geodesic domes or multi-story treehouses or, at the very least, condos with garages big enough to hold their trebuchets.
nero:
	 a ton of sunk costs have gone into this food. you can't just toss it! that's sociopathic. that's nero, fiddling while rome burns. the food version.
nervousenergynervousenergynervousenergy:
	 nervousenergynervousenergynervousenergy
nesting:
	projects are stackable. it's not that i'm starting something new before finishing something old - i'm nesting the new project inside the old. if it has screws, they shall be turned. if it has bolts, they shall be loosened. if it has rivets, they may get along for a while without being pried open, but that probably won't last.
nests:
	his bangs are crooked.  sideburns look like spider's nests.  poor fellow might as well have stuck his head in the garbage disposal!
net:
	 which means that overall, the net happiness of all products in the world combined is negative.
nether:
	disembodied voices from nether ain't he weird? 
netherworld:
	sylvie you think i?m limited to moving envelopes?  huh?  i have seen horrors in the netherworld you can scarcely imagine!  wretched beasts rent limb from limb shrieking in pain while other beasts cackle!  oh, i can think of some horrible things, all right.  i can make life miserable!
neuf:
	charlie  what are the "fancy eggs au vingt-neuf?"
neural:
	 it's sublimation of neural moisture, causing constriction of the blood vessels
neuro:
	your title is "the { chrono, neuro, aero, cosmo, reve, necro, cyber, astro, psycho, steam, meta, black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, war} s."
neuroses:
	166166;  neuroses are diagnosed
neurosis:
	sheldon as as for being socially maladjusted - well, guilty.  but doesn't everyone have some sort of neurosis?  better a little shy than, say, obsessed with celebrity, or addicted to drugs, or running around murdering people with axes.  really, you talk about socially awkward virgins living in their moms' basements - you're talking about serial killers.
neurotoxin:
	professor i first made the acquaintance of young master malki ! when he came under my tutelage at oxford -- introduction to mad biochemistry, as i recall. frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. "malki !, my lad," i told him on more than one occasion, "if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then i fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world." but some boys just refuse to listen.
neverending:
	4. ever since i saw "the neverending story,"  i've felt that if ever i am  truly needed, i will hear a book calling out to me.  it's happened twice and i've ignored it both times.
newark:
	[sign] newark
newberry:
	is this 817 newberry avenue?
newfangled:
	man and woman are driving about the town in one of those newfangled "horseless carriages".
newfound:
	walt-whitman-headed bat some small boon, some favor, some easy accessory against each day's uneasy burden?  so that your young, handsome faces may shine with newfound delight?
newish:
	glen his posts there inform me about a new username "krei-me-a-riva," which has a livejournal - and that has a link to a newish tumblr.
newlyweds:
	old  newlyweds.
newt:
	tiny tiny baby.  like a newborn newt.  all eyes and wet scales.
nez:
	photographer lose the pince-nez, chuck. we're going for upper-middle, not idle rich with this one.
nger:
	098098;  a doppelg&auml;nger features
nicaragua:
	carlos our planet's name is mexico.  it means "fragrant flowering fruit" in our native tongue.  prior cultures have called it by other names.  guatemala.  honduras.  el salvador.  nicaragua.
nicely:
	the wonderful pen-holder! no ink required. no pen, either, really - you can put anything you want in here. it just sits on your desk. maybe a miniature american flag? that'd fit nicely. or, put a pen on in. that's fine. j. t. hillyer, 306 broadway, n.y. henry ward writes "it is all it claims to be. a pen-holder, it is; wonderful, i suppose as well. i mean, it's not like standards are terribly high for a pen-holder. the pen does not fall out regularly."
niche:
	  if i knew anything about gun control, or campus law enforcement, or even korean immigration - maybe i'd have a shot.  but you have to really specialize if you want to be the expert.  and my stupid niche has yet to come up.  
nick:
	lawyer any zipper that can nick flesh might also maim flesh!
nicole:
	195195;  nicole reconsiders
nicolo:
	nicolo langston.  it's april.
nigh:
	- i can totally sense her nigh-self crying in pain! don't cry, little one!
nightly:
	johnson who says it's preferable to be awake?  pardon me if i relish my nightly visits to a lyrical realm of magic beauty.  why is that something i have to apologize for?  so i don't like leaving that all behind.  who would?
nightmare:
	 would you still love me if this nightmare became real tonight, susan? if the moon and the stars and my birthday just happened to combine in an awful, irresistible alchemy?
nightmares:
	 they form a long red line anchoring nightmares to the core of the earth.  i thought it would be a good trade
nightstand:
	wait.  no.  my notebook is right there on the nightstand.
nilly:
	i get that a red nose makes for a good toy...but you can't just make willy-nilly additions to santa's official roster!
nines:
	hatless dressed to the nines.
ninesies:
	carlos on mexico, creatures are segregated by horn quality into inviolable casts that annually rotate civic duties,  right now twosies are the lawyers, threesies the bakers, and ninesies like us are the astronauts.
ninth:
	agnes  oh, it wasn't easy!  first i tried the music shop on ninth.  but all they had was a bunch of junk!
nip:
	man2 dude, stop. seriously, let's just nip this in the bud.
nitrates:
	cynthia i will flourish here!  the soil is rich with nitrates!  better than that carpeting in your apartment!
nitrogen:
	sylvia  instead, can i freeze it with liquid nitrogen, then drop it into a hot spring?
nitrous:
	- nitrous oxide. you want a hit?
nixon:
	if obama wins, it'll probably be historic for reasons other than his being the fourteenth (after carter, nixon, jefferson, cleveland, both johnsons, tyler, hayes, jackson, madison, grant, wilson and arguably taylor) to feature palindromic vowel-consonant dispersion.
nnnnnah:
	bearded  nnnnnah, i think i got a library book i should be working on.
nnnrrghhh:
	<<workers nnnrrghhh>>
nobel:
	phil i'm telling you.  it's better than winning an ice cream nobel prize.  better than a runner's high brought on by hugging your mom.  it's better than everything.
nocturnal:
	644644; the nocturnal imposter
nod:
	 smile and nod 
noiac:
	your title is "the { chrono, neuro, aero, cosmo, reve, necro, cyber, astro, psycho, steam, meta, black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, war} s."
noir:
	in a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, vr-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | america, japan, soviet russia, victorian britain, medieval europe, aztec empire, atlantis, terraformed mars, antarctica, one-way spaceflight, outer rim world, set from road warrior,
nominally:
	another banner states "wondermark's" "nominally-essential" "tinkerer's handbook" "the magazine for people who cannot leave well enough alone". a woman is shown operating some sort of water pump.
nonetheless:
	jeremy  sure.  all our makeup.  i mean, you and i didn't meet until adulthood, but thanks to ubiquitous mass media, we had a shared childhood nonetheless.
nonfat:
	darrell (a peddler of concoctions) half-caf double tall 2-pump vanilla nonfat light foam latte!
nooo:
	 nooo braaaaakesss
noooo:
	aah jellyfish get them off get them off aaahhh please god noooo
noooooooo:
	 cell phone lines were jammed.  everyone was so busy fielding concerned calls from out-of-state relatives that they didn't notice the giant meteor oh noooooooo
noral:
	noral so...did...did you try it?
norbert:
	norbert salted peanut?
normals:
	camel  that's what i'm always saying, but the normals call me crazy!
norseman:
	234234;  a norseman succumbs
northern:
	311311; the scourge of northern europe
norway:
	octavio this guy in norway's been doing that since eisenhower.  and he has a theme song.
nosiest:
	- but above all else, james is certainly the nosiest man i know.
nostalgia:
	fur collar  the recontextualization of not just disposable but disposed of victorian imagery in the milieu of 21st century web-based publication and distribution is a baldly ironic statement of luddite intransigence, but with a humanizing layer of nostalgia and longing for vanished standards of craftsmanship and civility
notability:
	291291;  notability is determined
notation:
	dora last semester i had a student devise an elaborate scheme where he reduced vast swaths of the textbook into a shorthand notation that he printed onto his hands with ultraviolet ink... ...then he put a tiny l.e.d. blacklight in the bridge of his glasses.  much harder than simply studying, of course.
noted:
	301301;  hair growth is noted
notices:
	a conveyor belt "8. he paid $200 for this five years ago and never even used it. throw it in the garden and see if he even notices it's gone."
notorious:
	  writing to the president of inventions is like writing to santa claus, except that the president of inventions is a notorious intellectual-property thief and santa claus is imaginary.
notoriously:
	 grizzlies are notoriously ungracious
noun:
	suited man with beard noun?
nourishes:
	- your eyes are sparks that jump and snap in the hearth of my heart... i take your musk with me into the cold and it nourishes me. (turn the page)
novels:
	gene leprechauns, mainly.  also clovers, guinness, green stuff, and james joyce novels.   did i say clovers already?
novelties:
	 note for international readers hot topic is a store found in suburban shopping malls.  they sell a bizarre combination of naughty novelties, goth gear like corsets and boots, and trendy logo shirts with 'clever' sayings and nintendo characters and the emblems of punk rock bands that were big a decade before the average customer was born.  it is the dictionary definition of over-the-counter counterculture.
november:
	pat aggh!   it's, like, november already!  i haven't accomplished anything this year!
nozzle:
	 when he got it back, it had crusty stuff all up in the nozzle
nugget:
	but uncle george passed a kidney stone the size of a chicken nugget.
nuke:
	fat  and then, another nuke, bam, right in the heart of paris.
nuked:
	- oh god oh god we're gonna get nuked we're all gonna die
null:
	hellacious star-fiend term 'nathan' does not cognizate.  deliver cookies or be banished to the null dimension before i vomit from the stench of your filthy blood
nullify:
	julio ?nope!  i nullify your raisin bran attack with my lean cuisine ingredients list!  that's fifty points and now, you have to go outside!
numb:
	thelma  of course you don't!  you're marinating in it.  you're numb to it.
numerals:
	- very well, mrs. fogerty, please take down these numerals eight, six, th-
numerous:
	a girl is sitting on a bench, opposite a boy. behind the boy is a machine of some sort, and a wall on which are written numerous equations and formulas. a second girl is sitting nearer the machine.
nunchuk:
	sonja it wasn't a rope factory.  it was a nunchuk factory.
nurture:
	first woman oh, you are so right, you don't even know... i do nurture when i get the time
nurturer:
	second woman like a meadow in springtime, or a brisk blade of grass, glistening with dew. you are a nurturer! you are strong!
nurturing:
	a kind of poncho is shown. gossamer waterproof garments. get the genuine! beware of worthless imitations! rival garments are made of acid-treated poison cloth. ours are safe and nurturing to your babylike skin. don't you deserve not to have your skin corroded off by the competition? masochists need not respond. we don't want your business. this is a nice place. gossamer clothing co, 28 devonshire st., boston, ma.
nutball:
	father in other words, we should elect the most crazy nutball wackjob out there.
nuthin:
	felix nuthin'
nutjobs:
	student we sing songs about how mexicans are lazy, kids go to mexicans-are-lazy camp, there's all this ritual chanting...  but now is a tough time.  recently the church splity into factions - my group thinks zacatecanos are the laziest, but some crazy nutjobs think it's oaxacans. what a bunch of idiots!
nutrient:
	 supposedly the cucumber is the only food that contains every necessary nutrient, albeit in trace amounts for some. so if you're going to restrict yourself to a single food, twenty pounds of cucumbers is a reasonably smart choice.
nutrition:
	chuck  but everything today is so aberrant.  our food has no nutrition.  our kids are hyperallergic.  everyone's on psychiatric drugs.
nuttin:
	- nuttin', fool, jes' chillin'.
nutty:
	tiger  soft.  heavily marbled.  slightly nutty with a hint of old rum.
nuzzles:
	hector creeps up behind her and nuzzles her shoulder.  she is unfazed.
nyaaarrrmm:
	<<nyaaarrrmm>>
oa:
	voice whoa-oa!
oaxacans:
	student we sing songs about how mexicans are lazy, kids go to mexicans-are-lazy camp, there's all this ritual chanting...  but now is a tough time.  recently the church splity into factions - my group thinks zacatecanos are the laziest, but some crazy nutjobs think it's oaxacans. what a bunch of idiots!
obbawayt:
	- ahyah gannah havvah obbawayt?
obese:
	nathan is immensely obese.
obey:
	text  so stay close to your parents, lads and lasses, and obey;
obeyed:
	 it's a little-known fact that pirates were actually very good listeners and always obeyed grown-ups.  (hang a left at the trapdoor)
obituary:
	hey, this paper printed my obituary!
objected:
	151/ [151;  a common practice is objected to
objection:
	 guessing it pretty much went like this in real life, except with the wordy objection replaced by celebratory back-slapping
objects:
	eugene bank accounts are just numbers in a computer.  they're a representational fiction, not discrete objects.  it's all imaginary.
obligatory:
	 insert obligatory 'act of dog' joke
obscured:
	690690;  a tag is utterly obscured
observe:
	not simmons and simmons observe the goofy elk.  not simmons levels an awed finger in its direction; simmons watches it through binoculars.
observer:
	sergei  ah, but speed is relative!  it depends on the observer!
observes:
	he observes your sin, bartleby.
observing:
	petey  who in the world is going to be observing my digestion?
obsessing:
	max  just really, really obsessing about it.
obsessions:
	giovanni it's unhealthy!  listen, here's my card.  i'm a psychologist specializing in anxiety-causing obsessions.  give me a call.
obsolete:
	wishful spending trying to maintain some obsolete status quo is like running into the future with one leg tied behind your back!
obssessive:
	a strange-looking lipstick "5. no need to get dolled up any longer, now that your obssessive (sic) gardening has killed romance? use that lipstick to mark crop rows in the vegetable garden. the oily stain will serve as a warning to the sprouting plants never to set their sights too high."
obstacle:
	john who decided they should announce the score by saying which team's winning?  that seems one-sided.  people love underdogs, right?  framing the score in terms of which team has an obstacle to overcome would be more engaging!
obtained:
	"directions. 1. if the box you have obtained is larger than the prescribed size, cut it down to size. we have done extensive testing and our size is unequivocally the best. if your box needs to be watertight (say, if some of your unfinished projects involve plumbing, rainwater reclamation, or crab-husbandry) be sure to seal the new seams you are creating with plumber's goop. also take care to cut straight so that your seams will join smoothly. really 80% of this project is getting the seams right. the rest is just putting stuff in a box."
occasion:
	professor i first made the acquaintance of young master malki ! when he came under my tutelage at oxford -- introduction to mad biochemistry, as i recall. frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. "malki !, my lad," i told him on more than one occasion, "if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then i fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world." but some boys just refuse to listen.
occasional:
	- oh, you know. gnawing out burrs, the occasional alfalfa gorging. you?
occasionally:
	hal no one does.  but they're not going to just throw those partial bars away.  they melt 'em down to make new bars.  sometimes hundreds of times.  it's inevitable that contaminants will occasionally enter the process.
occupants:
	man 1 ...it's our first holiday season in the new house. super nice, super cozy. and then we get the first card. a holiday card addressed to the prior occupants, the taylors.
occur:
	070070;  a transaction fails to occur
occurence:
	you mean you're okay with intense sequences of violent action; liberal use of profanity, suggestive material, and drug references; and exactly one occurence of the "f" word?
occurred:
	carlos i do not know why this seems unlikely.  clearly we occupy a universe  it has occurred.  what is the probability that you wore a hat today?  one point zero.  it is certain.
ocd:
	a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild ocd, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert
oceans:
	jasper  the internet was once made of computers, not goats lashed together with fiber-optic cables and set adrift in the oceans!
octillion:
	george washington and? did you know there are over six octillion processes happening in your body every second? if i had an electron microscope i could tell 'em thanks! thanks for all the hard work! but i don't. cuz of martha.
odder:
	 same scene. floyd has once more replaced the odd attachments with ever odder attachments. 
oddities:
	a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild ocd, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert
odie:
	rocky that's an outrage!  i say, let them try - for i swear by odie's fuzzy muzzle that anyone bringing nut-snippers near my joy-bag will meet a dire, bloody end!
odometer:
	dan look, i've put in a lot of late nights for you.  i don't complain 'cause you pay me pretty well.  and every hour i'm here, i'm just watching an invisible odometer roll over in my head.  i've got no problem taking your money.  but i don't like working on your projects.  they're pointless to me, so i procrastinate; then i end up rushed and frustrated.  it's all stress i don't need.
odour:
	120120;  odour goes unnoticed
oed:
	 sure it is! means "to lie convincingly." archaic, but it's in the oed.
offend:
	man 2 but you sure were quick to change your tune when you thought it might offend me!
officers:
	 not pictured wwi-era german officers in pointy helmets, fakirs, stripes-wearing prisoners complete with shackles and iron balls, larry flynt
offices:
	malki ! behind the scenes here at wondermark, we work to ensure that only the highest quality product reaches your homes and offices.
offramp:
	interstate 10 at the pepper offramp...
offscreen:
	it continues to grow. only his mouth can be seen; the rest of the head is offscreen.
offshore:
	woman  *offshore drilling* is highly regulated, but the regulations weren't enforced.  result  massive oil spill catastrophe.
ogle:
	 ogle 
ohh:
	woman "ohh! look at me! i'm having a baby!"
ohhhohh:
	woman 2 ohhhohh saihkahnn euuucieee
oilin:
	 i happen to be oilin' my brakes.
oiling:
	father oiling... your brakes.
oilstone:
	(1) prepare your whittling tools. a good sharp chisel is of first importance in this work. add to your kit an oilstone and strop. place a few drops of oil on the stone and grind your blade upon its coarse side, then strop to remove the burr.
oily:
	a strange-looking lipstick "5. no need to get dolled up any longer, now that your obssessive (sic) gardening has killed romance? use that lipstick to mark crop rows in the vegetable garden. the oily stain will serve as a warning to the sprouting plants never to set their sights too high."
olfactory:
	 recognizable smells are specific combinations of airborne molecules called odorants. odorants are chemical vapors which must permeate a mucous membrane to bond with olfactory receptors.
olives:
	stavros  for me it would be mediterreanean olives, yougurts, figs and dates!
omissions:
	 polite omissions 
omni:
	main panel you've been marketed to!  some douche sent an intrusion using marketing  we don't believe you've seen enough commercial messages today!  we firmly believe that web content should serve no greater purpose than to attract eyeballs that we can cram full of ads.  and since you've already proven you're dumb enough to spend a dollar on an imaginary "gift," why shouldn't we press our luck?  we know that garish, omni-present ads eventually drove you away from myspace, but we figure we can get a good six months' worth of impressions out of you before you get fed up with us, too!
omnipresent:
	- but what about the tv ads? and billboards? and omnipresent radio spots? you sell drugs!
onboard:
	 get onboard with 
oncologist:
	doctor i showed your charts to a radiologist, an oncologist, and my kid sister, who once got a b+ in geography.
oneself:
	  i agree!  simply mumbling to oneself is perfectly valid.  it's how some people organize their thoughts!
onions:
	waiter  buffalo burger for you, medium well with no onions, mustard on the side, sub out the fries for salad.
onstar:
	  if we had gotten onstar for the front door like i wanted, this wouldn't have happened.
ooga:
	scientist 1 ... so 25% more "ooga booga," and hold the spear two degrees left ...
oogbgha:
	 my wife oogbgha has a recipe that will set your very veins afire
ooout:
	francine (sings)  jim miller's discount isuzu! check us ooout on yelp.
oop:
	oop! of course. how silly of me. looks like you're stuck here.
ooze:
	finally she is just a pool of ooze and/or goop
oozing:
	ugh, it's so hot.  is it hot where you are?  i think i feel it more 'cuz of the vicodin.  did i tell you about my surgery?  oh, it was horrible.  my scar wouldn't stop oozing for like three weeks.
openers:
	coal in the home. the family in question had attached turbine-boilers to every device in the home toasters, refrigerators, can-openers &c. what reports fail to mention is that the lady of the house works in a factory where the small boilers are manufactured. she acquires them at a steep discount. this is clearly out of range for the average family.
openings:
	dean an anteater actually, my proboscis allows me to reach into narrow openings to retrieve vari
opera:
	jimmy unlike the animals, in order to communicate we must convert ideas down into inefficient sets of words.  this is such a lost of nuance that it's like recounting an opera in morse code.  to a cocker spaniel, human speech is like beeping in german.
operations:
	man #1 vice president of global operations. he gets  learjet and a butler.
opportunistic:
	caption opportunistic tv journalists
opted:
	 technically the roman saturnalia and the pagan solstice festival were separate and both co-opted by christianity centuries apart but whatever, historical accuracy
optic:
	jasper  the internet was once made of computers, not goats lashed together with fiber-optic cables and set adrift in the oceans!
optimism:
	i got enough mechanical problems with this project.  at least leave me my optimism.
optimizated:
	winthrop  something's still wrong.  when was the last time you optimizated this document?
optimizates:
	481481;  linda optimizates
optionally:
	 optionally, they can be prepared drizzled with artisanal peppercorn shavings, or sprinkled with crushed crystalline minerals.  zagat take notice
oral:
	 apparently the oral history will stop at this generation
orbit:
	dan come in, space command?yes, i'll make another orbit.  heading across the lunar horizon now.
orchestra:
	406406;  there's a problem in the orchestra
ordained:
	173173;  a bison is ordained
orderly:
	mikey please form an orderly line to my left.  cash only.
ordinance:
	katie okay, c'mon, sample ballot page eight propositions.  shall the state chapter be amended and ordinance adopted to fund a bond measure allocated for infrastructural repairs?
orgaaaaans:
	henry  dad you don't understand i need you to give me a million cookies right now or the invisible dragon is going to devour you and me and mom and everyone and the streets will run red with our liquefied orgaaaaans
organ:
	kris, an old man with a pegleg and a portable organ around his neck, extends his hat to a young girl.
organization:
	arvid either my identical twin brother - with whom i share a strange and unexplained psychic bond - is about to come to severe physical harm or my massive multinational organization is about to have its global strategy dictated by the signers of an internet petition!
organize:
	  i agree!  simply mumbling to oneself is perfectly valid.  it's how some people organize their thoughts!
organs:
	712712; all organs are approximated
orking:
	police be-cause it's wo-o-orking!
ornate:
	a man in a turban sits, with some scales.   a woman in a sari and ornate earrings sits as well.
orphan:
	 and now i can't use my idea about time-traveling cavemen who team up with a race of bird-humans to set up a sham wizard school in the american west in a plot to groom orphan boys to impersonate various missing and presumed dead heirs to massive fortunes around the world because somebody already did it better
orphaned:
	jen i didn't return a dying man's wedding ring to his widow.  i didn't start a charity for the orphaned children of firefighters.  i wanted to, but it was hard.
ostensibly:
	evan mom and dad slipped up and revealed foreknowledge of certain presents that were ostensibly from "santa."
osteoporosis:
	guy and women are at great risk for breast cancer, osteoporosis, and hysteria.
ostrich:
	hans apparently deep down i consider you a psychopathic ostrich farmer.
otherwise:
	judge finkins otherwise, everything is fine.
otherworldly:
	stumbles across a(n) { magic diadem, arcane prophecy, dusty tome, crazy old man, alien artifact, enchanted sword, otherworldly portal, dream-inducing drug, encrypted data feed, time-traveling soldier, exiled angel, talking fish
otis:
	otis you really said that to him?
otter:
	- jamie? how's the otter report?
ought:
	nelson (interrupting and looking the other way)  hey scrooge mcdork!  nothing in your life will turn out as well as you think it ought to!
outlandish:
	all outlandish claims are taken at face value because we need to fill pages with something
outlaw:
	 also i will outlaw tree sap
outpost:
	this is zion, o simpleton.  thusly have i christened my sanctuary, my ascetic outpost, which secludes me from all worldly cares.
outright:
	then i thought, it's silly to be so insecure!  i'll just show it to her, she can't just hate it outright
outsized:
	same city backgrond; bug, alone, with outsized levitating mirror, dejectedly evaluates self with displeasure 
overall:
	 which means that overall, the net happiness of all products in the world combined is negative.
overblogged:
	 that sounds retarded.  seriously, that sounds like shallow, "web 2.0" overblogged crap making one company rich of the backs of a bunch of wannabe-hipster suckers.
overclock:
	  in an emergency, s.a.m.i.r. can overclock his central cam-drive, thus enabling him to give 110%.
overdrawn:
	todd wait - was that card made of banana leaf? / gustavo it was definitely some sort of leaf. / todd well there's the problem.  that one's overdrawn.  marsha, give him the one made of bark.
overed:
	- have you seen it? it's gray, and all overed in vomit...
overenunciated:
	jimmy you see, all human language is descended from a mother, animal tongue.  to the beasts, our yammering, overenunciated dialects sound like so much chittering gibberish!
overhead:
	hobart has an urgent need.  overhead is a large banner.
overheard:
	caption 100% true things i overheard at the dinner table this thanksgiving
overhears:
	- and what if someone overhears your secret magic incantations?
overlook:
	stumpy i was gonna overlook the proposal's shortcomings and marry you anyway.
overlooking:
	we're looking over the shoulders of a man wearing a suit and a top hat holding a cane and another man holding wearing a fur-collared coat.  they are sitting on a bench overlooking a waterfront scene in a city.
overlords:
	- who would you rather take the alien overlords out to dinner?
overly:
	newspaper text some people have rebelled against this notion, and constantly keep on the move, busying themselves with the creation of novel problems and competing to find overly-elaborate ways to solve them. this magazine is our attempt to cash in on that demographic.
overnight:
	earl  i soaked them in lime juice overnight, then deep-fried them in mayonnaise!
overnighted:
	wouldn't you know it, a friend of his in texas had this one for sale, and i was able to get it overnighted.  i hope it's a good one!
overpower:
	masked  you were biting it with the mustard side down. when your tongue hits that mustard, it'll overpower every other flavor! you need to bite mustard side up -- so your tongue first goes through the lettuce, meat, and cheese! in ascending order of flavor power! that way, you experience a more balanced palate.
overriding:
	sarah  well, maybe that's an overriding concern for some reason.
oversaw:
	matt listen, my crew worked very hard!  i personally oversaw the preparation of the mortar!  we even weighed each brick to make sure none of them were hollow for some reason!
oversimplified:
	  the problems arise when oversimplified concepts evolve into common knowledge.  then the complicated version--the more accurate version--starts sounding to the public like heresy!
oversleep:
	abelard afternoon, johnson.  oversleep again?
overslept:
	chris years from now you'll pinpoint this morning that you overslept as the exact moment your fortunes take a turn for the worse.   so you'll send a message back in time, hiring me to make sure you get up!
overstock:
	- sometimes i overstock my cart just to make her yell at me... her cries of desperate futility are so hot.
overt:
	509509;  a horn is overt
overtly:
	- but they may be overtly using their political power to enrich themselves! or at the very least you know they're gonna have a tough time being fair-minded when it comes to representing less-well-off constituents!
overtones:
	031031;  overtones are present
overturned:
	sidney sits on an overturned rowboat.  a large seabird stands before him.
ovum:
	 astonishing! johnson, bring the calipers.  i'd wager this is the largest ovum on record!
owned:
	do you sleep on the most comfortable mattress in the world? of course you do not. the most comfortable mattress in the world is owned by an italian stockbroker. but we saw it in a magazine and modeled ours after what it is probably like. still most likely a step up for you. mattresses & meat
ownership:
	536536;  sparky changes ownership
ox:
	jill also, maybe you missed the press release, but all new businesses now have to send the mayor a live musk-ox, and i didn't see that mentioned in the document.
oxford:
	professor i first made the acquaintance of young master malki ! when he came under my tutelage at oxford -- introduction to mad biochemistry, as i recall. frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. "malki !, my lad," i told him on more than one occasion, "if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then i fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world." but some boys just refuse to listen.
oxide:
	- nitrous oxide. you want a hit?
oxygen:
	- oxygen intolerance?
packaged:
	the chart is titled packaged candy sales and shows a sharp increase for the month of october.
packages:
	alt text fine. wintergreen? how about custom packages of tic tacs? folks can rattle them when they want us to kiss! --jason are you trying to give me a migraine
pagan:
	 technically the roman saturnalia and the pagan solstice festival were separate and both co-opted by christianity centuries apart but whatever, historical accuracy
painful:
	goat fox, if you're reading herb's mail, you are scum, and i pray every day for your speedy, painful demise.
painkillers:
	 one more glimpse of that alabaster flesh stirs in me a fever i'd but dreampt of on the boldest of painkillers.
pains:
	dick  as much as it pains me to say it...everyone, pack up your things.  our doors are closing.
painstaking:
	 martin's hobbies mostly involve spending long hours imagining, in painstaking detail, what life might be like on a planet where cheetos are legal tender
paintbrushes:
	woman 1 so he says, "paintbrushes are what? just animal hair, repackaged!"
palace:
	- her majesty queen victoria once levelled a disapproving scowl of such ferocious intensity that none of the servant at buckingham palace were capable of shameful bodily functions for three whole days!
palatial:
	- i'm done living on the freezing streets. i'm done wiping windshields for crack money. and frankly, i'm done with "us." i'm going back to my palatial mansion with my six dozen servants and my cabana boy, julio.
paleface:
	- no, i mean how the hell you gonna swing that, paleface?
palindromic:
	if obama wins, it'll probably be historic for reasons other than his being the fourteenth (after carter, nixon, jefferson, cleveland, both johnsons, tyler, hayes, jackson, madison, grant, wilson and arguably taylor) to feature palindromic vowel-consonant dispersion.
pallor:
	- still got good pallor.
palm:
	two peaches held in the palm of a hand.
palsy:
	a picture is shown that says "dr. johnson's $30 health-lift." if you suffer from palsy, we will treat you. if you are afflicted with pox, we will address you. even if you are right now dying of tuberculosis, call us. will you be healed? almost certainly not. but we will talk with you so you're not lonely. (as we are.)
pamper:
	 fine, simon.  we'll also pitch 'don't you deserve a day off?  indulge yourself with plaque-vac!  take whole lazy afternoons to pamper your gums.'
pan:
	pan out to parker and dave doing something involving a ladle and a container inside a wooden frame.
pancake:
	josh but viscous bile drips from their ragged flesh, searing the earth in pancake-sized globs of corroding
pancakes:
	rob (offpanel)  thinking about midnight pancakes. you want to come?
panda:
	doctor well, it's a step up from claiming to be a panda bear, at least. you're not still eating leaves, are you?
pandas:
	 now we will never see the pandas humping (
pandering:
	- i really do not want to give in to their crass and obvious pandering to my demographic. / but yet i really want a ninja turtles t-shirt.  i have been agonizing over this.
pandora:
	larry don't need a dj!  just play pandora from a laptop!
pansy:
	adolphus fine, i'll ask him.  pansy.
panthro:
	where's panthro when you need him?
papayas:
	wo  charlie was a fruit salesman.  smelled like papayas.
paperboys:
	paperboy extra! extra!  p-paperboys... run like girls!  *sob*
paperclips:
	sylvie next time i?m gonna scatter some paperclips see how you like it then
paperwork:
	customer i received it as a gift and sadly i do not believe grandmother kept proper track of the paperwork. what with her advanced age and various pressing anxieties vis-a-vis same.
papi:
	kathleen  antonio.  papi.  why do you have to be this way?  why can't we just be good to one another?
papyrus:
	 papyrus.
parade:
	josh get indoors!  there's a parade of monsters coming this way!
parades:
	 nah, i just like raining on parades.
paragon:
	winifred each day we look forward to your charming humor.  you are a paragon of manhood.
paragraph:
	"to whom it may concern at noon tomorrow, my plague will begin to infect the entire city.  unless, of course..."  new paragraph...
paragraphs:
	a headline lower down reads "tools guide." numbered paragraphs describe the referenced pictures.
paralyzed:
	my judo strike had paralyzed him instantly.  he was limp, his blood hot on my hands.
parasites:
	woman all i'm saying is that beverly has a creature living inside of her whereas i am a perfectly healthy human being totally devoid of parasites
parasiticide:
	 put your hand over your heart -- so that the words may transmute your very blood to parasiticide
parcel:
	rope "2. ordinary parcel twine can be used to tie saplings to posts, rather than some kind of special gardening twine. it's not like you're going to use it for parcels. the only people who still tie parcels with twine are grandmothers, and that's only because the mail clerks feel bad yelling at them to knock it off."
pardoning:
	pardoning me.
pared:
	eleanor  i've pared the collection down to the essentials.
parentage:
	281281;  corporate parentage is revealed
parental:
	060060;  parental prerogative is exercised
parenthood:
	490490;  parenthood is fraught
pariah:
	imagine he's going to a wedding.  oh, the dirty looks he'll receive!  the pariah of his family!
parks:
	teacher  why do tornadoes always seem to touch down in trailer parks?
parlay:
	glen i was hoping to perhaps parlay my expertise in ennui into some sort of lucrative public speaking profession.
parody:
	 dear mr malki while i enjoy your work it is incredibly obvious to everybody that you would rather be writing a parody strip titled 'incredibly verbose garfield'
parquet:
	a squareish design is shown, divided into parts, that say "carpet," "wood," "c8, ny," and "621 b'way." parquet and inlaid floors, borders for rugs, baseboards, decks, crown molding, doors, anything wood feeds our weird fetish.
parrot:
	woman 2 of course you do.  the school don't want no lices neither.  anything this world teaches you to recite or sing or parrot back is just for purposes of the mass delousing of crowds.
parsley:
	second gentle awful. lettuce was wilted, and the dressing appeared to be just mayonnaise with flakes of parsley sort of drowned in it.
partakes:
	581581;  the captain partakes in sport
partial:
	hal no one does.  but they're not going to just throw those partial bars away.  they melt 'em down to make new bars.  sometimes hundreds of times.  it's inevitable that contaminants will occasionally enter the process.
participant:
	bart off-panel each picture is a moment with its own unique vantage point.  taken collectively, they're a document more comprehensive, more detail-sensitive, than any participant's actual experience.
participants:
	246246; participants in democracy
participating:
	lawyer would you be interested in participating in a class action? to punish the zipper company for is cavalier pursuit of never-ending profits at the expense of ordinary, hardworking, zipper-reliant citizens like yourself?
participation:
	 punching 4 direct to dvd with foreign distro pre-sold contingent on dean cain's participation
partickler:
	grandpa about what in partickler
parting:
	but which you'll never consider parting with?
partners:
	todd become what?  partners in a whaling boat?  rival spoon collectors?  veterinary urologists?
passable:
	greg all right, cell phone manufacturers.  you've been doing fair to passable so far.   i can talk on your things.  i can check my email.  i can listen to music pretty okay.
passerby:
	nelson leaps onto a passerby and starts sucking on the man's head.
passers:
	down on the shore, passers-by gawk and point at the sight of pat and his glider helplessly entangled in the power and phone lines.
passionate:
	and continue dancing with a passionate intensity
passionately:
	man #2 thank you! it's fascinating hearing you ramble passionately yet only half-coherently about something you read online somewhere.
passover:
	satan okay, well, make it quick, we're just sitting down to passover seder.
passport:
	 stamp your passport at 
pasted:
	first gentle i'd have liked a little of that on my sandwich. it was less tuna salad than vaguely fish-like pasted between two chunks of particle board.
pastime:
	110110;  a pastime is exposed
pastimes:
	402402;  martin could rethink his pastimes
pastoral:
	a pastoral field, dotted with trees. the weather is clear and springy.
pasty:
	 prescient pasty 
patch:
	glen first i googled the slogan from that crazy patch on his brother's backpack.  it's some obscure band with only like a hundred facebook fans.  found his brother there, and of course he's friends with his brother.
patently:
	teacher w-what?  that's patently offensive.
pathologically:
	pathologically.
pathos:
	woman it had -pathos- and -humor- and surprising -depth- and it was even about -all- the topics that i -love-
paths:
	may our paths be straight and our footsteps be reasonably well-lit!
pathway:
	lost in limbo after his death, he will seek out its fragrant smoke as it rises through the clouds as a pathway to follow toward heaven.
patio:
	sten great house, right?   do you already have financing?  down payment?  check out these french doors, this patio...
patriarch:
	 i don't dress this way for men, you patriarch
patriotism:
	you know it was designed by some callous jerk trying to cash in on honest folks' patriotism.
patronymic:
	 mccain calls himself a 'maverick,' but mckinley beat him to the patronymic particle by over 100 years.
patterns:
	voicemail if you know your party's extension, you may dial it in reverse order using your touch-tone phone.  to access a company directory, please hold your phone receiver over a stove and watch the patterns the steam makes when viewed against a dark background.
pause:
	no craft shall pass unappreciated. it is always worthwhile to pause and intake a thing of beauty. plus, it may spark a concordant idea of one's own.
paused:
	 i would think it would be obvious from the way i always leave the dvd paused on that scene while we do it
pavlovian:
	harold sorry, i hear "i have a confession", it's like a pavlovian thing.
paw:
	man pokes head into panel; looks at cat. cat daintly raises paw. sixteenth notes return to background of panel.
pawns:
	 according to the topline, tabbies age 3-6 love the pawns -- but we still can't get any quadrant on those calicos
paws:
	calvin oh, i've searched for it for ages.  pored through dusty stacks to no avail.  searched every catalog i could get my grubby paws on?but where i failed, lad, you prevailed.  tell me!  how did you locate it?  on which remove bookshelf did you peep its flaking spine?
payable:
	god and lo, i shall bring pestilence and locusts to all of accounts payable, until someone teaches cynthia the proper use of the 'reply all' button.
payday:
	leon that's why i should be your first choice for pet surgery!  i'll display an inhuman detachment during your snookie's suffering, or you get half off your first cremation!   leon's budget veterinary - on sixth, upstairs from payday-loans-n-go!
payout:
	nora what?  did you spill it?  did you burn your central intelligence agency?  should we be expecting some sort of cash payout from yum! brands, inc.?
pc:
	harry  that's right.  if you wanna watch tv, you can watch dvds of 1980s sesame street, before it got all pc.
peach:
	 pick out a peach at 
peacock:
	jerry a peacock hey!  my eyes are down here!
pearls:
	a gorilla wearing pearls and a summer hat
peddled:
	348348;  concoctions are peddled
peddler:
	darrell (a peddler of concoctions) half-caf double tall 2-pump vanilla nonfat light foam latte!
pedestal:
	tad and adelaide draw close to a giant strawberry on a pedestal.
pedestrian:
	matt [speaking to his reflection in a mirror] you can't do it.  you're not good enough.  you're not talented.  you're entirely pedestrian.
pedigree:
	459459;  pants have a pedigree
pee:
	perkins are we gonna get to pee before we start the invasion?
peeling:
	picture of someone peeling a potato
peep:
	calvin oh, i've searched for it for ages.  pored through dusty stacks to no avail.  searched every catalog i could get my grubby paws on?but where i failed, lad, you prevailed.  tell me!  how did you locate it?  on which remove bookshelf did you peep its flaking spine?
peeve:
	134134;  a peeve is described
pegleg:
	kris, an old man with a pegleg and a portable organ around his neck, extends his hat to a young girl.
penal:
	julian the penal code doesn't get me!
penalized:
	martin i feel like my life's being penalized 'cause i'm not really interested in, like, stock trading.  or car repair.  or sex.  even the wife's been bugging me to learn plumbing.
penalties:
	ross there are actually severe civil penalties if you buy any less than a vat.
penalty:
	hugo but whenever some external force, such as the state, commands us under penalty to to do or not do certain things - isn't that negating our personal choice to do or not do that thing?  in other words, removing our free will.  and isn't free will and moral agency the defining characteristic of humanity?  thus, i must reject any "law" that prescribes my actions as incompatible with my very nature as a reasoning being!
pencil:
	- if you look real close, you can see the dot were i jabbed her with my pencil. go on, take a gander, she don't mind.
penciled:
	 the legends come down to us in yellowed fur-trappers'  journals...in shaky rough-hewn script, scrawled by fading candlelight, a single penciled word 'awesome.'
penitentiary:
	wide view of a large, official-looking building.  it's a jail.  it's the state penitentiary.
pennybags:
	hastings has stabbed rich uncle pennybags (the monopoly guy) and snatched his wallet.  eli is appalled.
pens:
	sylvie i sold ballpoint pens door-to-door from my nash metropolitan
pensacola:
	i was in pensacola!
pensively:
	a woman is walking in the surf by the ocean.  the wind is blowing and she is looking pensively off-panel.
peoples:
	josh look, whatever he was trying to do, he ended up subjugating the native peoples and opening the door for european exploitation of the americas!
peppercorn:
	 optionally, they can be prepared drizzled with artisanal peppercorn shavings, or sprinkled with crushed crystalline minerals.  zagat take notice
pepsi:
	man 1 d-do you really work for pepsi?
perambulator:
	exterior of a house a nurse and a perambulator.
perceive:
	minister i mean, you call someone stupid every day of his life, that's gonna factor in somehow.  brilliant, same way.  plus it affects how people treat you.  how they perceive you.  just that little bit.  i didn't take chances, myself.  changed my own name to somethin' good.   made sure my boy got a good name, too.
percents:
	perry  frankly, managing to give a hundred percent would be miraculous, as i always reserve a handful of percents for basic personal use.
perception:
	phil you invented a dream-me out of your personal, and thus by definition limited, understanding of who i am.  anything that shadow-puppet did in the bony cavern of your imagination reflects not on me, but upon your perception of me.
perfecting:
	nurse well, what did you expect?  people spend years perfecting unicycling.
perform:
	bruce we will need to perform a complex and incredibly expensive musical exorcism.  luckily, i just happen to be in a band!  we can probably squeeze you in between our incredibly important gigs in the courts of popes worldwide
performed:
	 the video is called 'wagner's ring cycle as performed by a tugboat'
performs:
	bart we'll be up front hearing people cough and shuffle around, while cameras all around us are capturing instants, preserving the most fleeting of glances, showing us (and those to come after us) more than we could ever notice on our own.  in a way, the day when everyone gathers and performs the ceremony is simply a run-through for the cameras.  the documentary evidence is what lasts forever.
perfume:
	shopkeeper man, i've been selling clean out of deodorant, hand lotion, and perfume! / i swear, it's like people been throwing it away.
perheps:
	apparatchik komrade kringle! perheps i tink ve should do more of de party fundraising and less of de party line, da?
perimeter:
	rolf listen closely!  your patrol will be along the perimeter of the compound.  maintain high alert at all times.
periodical:
	marvin (sweating) anyway i sent her my rent money for the month, but she promised that she would photocopy several pages of the periodical for you
peripherally:
	084084;  movement is detected only peripherally
perish:
	olaf this is a raid you shall all perish by the hand of olaf the - oh, wait, what's that - that's new
permanent:
	the child gets to play with it while it's new and exciting, but everyone's spared the task of finding it a permanent home.
permutation:
	vince i don't know, it seems to me that any pun or permutation of the 'girls gone wild' concept would just be inherently in poor taste, especially at marketing directed at children.  also, it sends the tacit message that 'girls gone wild' is a normal and acceptable part of our culture - when in fact it's seedy trash that thrives on the most crass and debased elements of human nature.
perpetually:
	jordan most likely to power his croissant bakery with perpetually clean-burning jewel energy!
perplexed:
	holly looks perplexed.
perpretrated:
	chief squirting elk do you also the mountain of injustice perpretrated by the white man upon my kind?
persistence:
	624624; the persistence of work
persons:
	speaker hogblotter very well, let it be law.  any place with two or more persons gathered must blare christmas music incessantly for the entire month of december.
pesky:
	"out there in the world, if it wasn't for those pesky market forces keeping us down...if only we could charge nine dollars for a whopper, well, by god, we would."
pestilence:
	god and lo, i shall bring pestilence and locusts to all of accounts payable, until someone teaches cynthia the proper use of the 'reply all' button.
peter:
	235235;  peter reveals much
peters:
	footer guest comic by greg peters (suspect-device.com)
petticoat:
	mack  we'll fashion a rope ladder from your petticoat.
petting:
	andrew petting his cat whoozums loves me?  whoozums loves me?  lookit that little face.  lookit that little smile!
petulant:
	edwin but i hate dogs!  they're so yappy and petulant.  if i wanted that, we'd just have kids.
pfc:
	 pfc. pierce heroically hid in a trench while his legs were located by members of the 1st infantry
ph:
	 in fact, he has his master's in catology and has done extensive post-graduate work at the cat institute in cattington but stopped short of getting his ph.d. due to an unfortunate catastrophe
phage:
	your title is "the { chrono, neuro, aero, cosmo, reve, necro, cyber, astro, psycho, steam, meta, black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, war} s."
phallus:
	- but what exactly are we going to do with the lake monster's phallus, anyway? 
pharmaceuticals:
	yuri i do not understand how human beings functioned before the invention of pharmaceuticals.  the pyramids!  the great wall of china!  railroads crossing continents!
pharmacist:
	- but you're a pharmacist, not a doctor. you haven't examined me, not diagnosed me. you can't presume to make health decisions for me.
pharmacology:
	086086;  pharmacology factors
phenomenon:
	is the phenomenon just under-reported?  are rich people suppressing the news of their own misfortune?
philandering:
	- whoa, whoa, hold your horses there, buddy.  our kids? / like, offspring resulting from some hypothetical union of you and me?  i don't know what sort of abnormal philandering you're hinting at, but leave me and my chromosomes out of your sick plans, okay?
philosophical:
	culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.
phones:
	 if you get one of those cheap phones with the candy inside, you can have the freedom to speak your mind plus delicious candy
phonograph:
	a stern-faced boy is "dancing" in front of phonograph
photocopy:
	marvin (sweating) anyway i sent her my rent money for the month, but she promised that she would photocopy several pages of the periodical for you
photographed:
	bart you know, i got to thinking?there's something hyperreal about an obsessively-photographed event.
photographic:
	todd cold war reenactors?  dressing up in old soviet uniforms, photographic documents with tiny cameras...using phrases like "checkpoint charlie" in bed
photojournalists:
	simon hey, have any reporters shown up lately?  tv trucks?  camera vans?  photojournalists who may also be arachnid-based superheroes?  anything like that?
photoshop:
	mario let him!  he'll find a citation with today's date for this exact point on the street.  photoshop lets me customize it for anywhere i park.
physically:
	francine  and they always include the location. no other jingle tells you where to physically go and get the product.
pi:
	voicemail your call is very important to us.  please listen carefully, as our menu options have recently changed.  for billing, press one.  for sales, press two.  for technical support, press pi.
pickin:
	john "comin' up ta me/ pickin' up my hand/ she looks real serious an' i do not unnerstan'"
pickled:
	santa santa is very concerned with your cellulose intake!  it's how he tracks you!  i've also brought some pickled marzipan!  its horridness will stimulate your bile ducts and make you smell less appetizing to the stingroaches i have also brought you.  you should start taking their venom in small doses now, while you are still larval.  be cautious!  they are not tame.
pickpocket:
	738738; the most brazen pickpocket
pickup:
	caption  airport pickup zone, 1235 pm
pickups:
	harold for example, yesterday a guy asked why there's a surcharge for pickups from the airport.  hel-looo!   municipal regulations have stipulated that surcharge ever since it passed the city assembly!  it's completely detailed in the cab company's contract with the airport authority!
picky:
	 being picky has cost him valuable time!
pictured:
	 not pictured wwi-era german officers in pointy helmets, fakirs, stripes-wearing prisoners complete with shackles and iron balls, larry flynt
piddlepaddle:
	 cheaplaugh manor is on piddlepaddle lane at the intersection of whoopydoo and yardeyardeyaryar
pies:
	 plenty of pies at 
piggledy:
	leprechaun hi de higgledy, ho de piggledy, hi-dilly ho-dilly hi-dilly ho
piggybacked:
	a stereoscopic image gus, atop his giant eagle glenda, attempts to lasso the piggybacked and gargantuan anthropomorphized hippos anton and jay.  mount banjo erupts  dramatically in the background.
pigtails:
	with the help of a { sarcastic female techno-geek, tomboyish female mechanic, shape-shifting female assassin, leather-clad female in shades, girl who's always loved him, bookish female scholar with mousy brown hair, cherubic girl with pigtails and spunk, female who inexplicably becomes attracted to the damaged protagonist for unstated reasons
pilates:
	will you hire only the best equestrian-pilates trainers?  and will you do the exercises with her so she doesn't get self-conscious?  despite the fact that they are designed for a horse's body, not a man's?
pillage:
	i mean, i want to pillage 'em, but i don't want to cause no problems.
pillars:
	joanne i'm running new pillars up from the basement for support.  probably reclaimed barnwood.
pills:
	 the first guy left his own phone in a swamp.  it's better when he remembers the pills.
pilot:
	a truly spectacular steam helicopter has descended.  mike is the pilot.
piloting:
	ralph is piloting his spiffy steam-powered car.
pimp:
	 pimp your ride at 
pimples:
	fat   still plagued, in this day and age!  bloody menace, pimples.
pimptastic:
	coal-powered vehicles. it also turns out that the man of the house is an auto mechanic specializing in absurd "pimptastic" modifications! this is hardly repeatable.
pin:
	woman so you feelin' it then! you got it so deep in your bones that you're fixin' to grab up a pin and help a sister out!
pince:
	photographer lose the pince-nez, chuck. we're going for upper-middle, not idle rich with this one.
pinch:
	guido you can't talk!   i jinxed you!  pinch poke you owe me a coke!
pinched:
	435435;  a guy is pinched
pinches:
	seashore.  a woman is standing with her hands in her hair, possibly tying back a loose strand.  an old skeevy man pinches her on the bottom.
pined:
	727727;  friendship is pined for
piningly:
	now an old man, the fellow strums a harp piningly.  two children look on.
pinked:
	left i got it in from alistano down at the dog creamery. bifton got pinked by jornavenich!
pinky:
	tigrour oh, i get it, pinky here's got your priorities all in a bunch.
pinpoint:
	chris years from now you'll pinpoint this morning that you overslept as the exact moment your fortunes take a turn for the worse.   so you'll send a message back in time, hiring me to make sure you get up!
pinstriped:
	otto five men in pinstriped suits.  didn't play around.
pint:
	(6) once needle has seating, use foot pedal to advance nectar at a rate of one pint per minute.
pipers:
	- hard to find good pipers these days.
piranha:
	piranha they gave me crappy shoes!
pirated:
	octavio like playing video games?  for every hour you play, some korean kid plays five.  name any sport you like.  some dweeb-o's been at it all day every day since he could walk.  and forget about creative media.  in this day and age, not even the most avid hobbyist can compete with "pirated software and zero social life."
piratey:
	man wearing piratey hat, coat and breeches watches woman in cap, long dress and apron hanging laundry on an outdoor clothesline
pissed:
	 oh man father o'malley is gonna be super pissed
pitfalls:
	potential pitfalls. handling coal will give you finger cancer
pithy:
	man 1 just one that reads "bumper stickers are an ineffectual means of communicating my nuanced views on a variety of issues that cannot be reduced to a single pithy slogan." oh, and some dried blood, i think.
pitiful:
	- soaring above the pitiful world below, i am undisputed master of all i survey!
pkiznvvq:
	scotty "gnxbinrff!  hnjyvrnglz!  krvngblarwx!  pkiznvvq!"
placebos:
	contraband? stolen goods?  illegal ferrets?  drugs?  placebos?  placentas?
placed:
	449449;  'food' is placed in quotes
placentas:
	contraband? stolen goods?  illegal ferrets?  drugs?  placebos?  placentas?
plagiarism:
	- that's not original! i've half a mind to sue you for plagiarism.
plagued:
	fat   still plagued, in this day and age!  bloody menace, pimples.
plagues:
	sick  i was torn into by an illness left over from the plagues of egypt.
plainer:
	- oh, no, my dear, you've misunderstood! let me explain in plainer terms...
plaintive:
	 'come along chadwick,' said father, pulling the boy roughly by the hand. 'but papa!' came the plaintive wail -- 'the cows, the cows, the cows, the cows!'
planar:
	platonic friends?  pluralistic ignorance?  planar geometrics?  planck's constant?  plastic bags that could suffocate children?
planck:
	platonic friends?  pluralistic ignorance?  planar geometrics?  planck's constant?  plastic bags that could suffocate children?
plank:
	bob you still working on that?  knock it off.  i gotta lock up.  your plank storage unit looks swell.  let's go home.
plankton:
	harold plankton?  halliburton?  columbus day?  you gotta give me a little more to go on.
plantation:
	man 1 man, i thought dole was a big, happy pineapple-plantation kind of place!  not some corporate subsidiary of the evil frito-lay empire!
planted:
	spencer so that's it, then?  you're planted here?  we see one play and you decide this is where you're settling down?
plaques:
	student  i want to major in making inscribed plaques.
plasmic:
	the electro-plasmic hydrocephalic genre-fiction generator 2000
plates:
	davey hey, do you ever have weird ideas about how to better society?  i had one.  what if, at meals, everybody got into the habit of putting their plates into the center of the table once they were finished?  so other people could work on the leftovers if they wanted, without it being awkward.  that way, food wouldn't have to go to waste
platonic:
	platonic friends?  pluralistic ignorance?  planar geometrics?  planck's constant?  plastic bags that could suffocate children?
players:
	girl in my class you'll find three astronauts, a couple firefighters, a bunch of baseball players and rock stars, and one cow minder.
playin:
	- oh, girl, i'm jes playin, you know it.
plaza:
	cops trying to cordon off the main plaza but people are throwing bottles #downtownriots
plead:
	marvin my resentful attitude toward fatherhood will yield spiteful and maladjusted children. on my deathbed, i will plead with them for reconciliation. to no avail.
pledged:
	 okay, now that i've pledged, what's the secret frequency with no more program breaks?
plops:
	karl when you squeeze the tube, you generate energy.  this powers a chemical reaction that results in the formation of a semi-solid mass.  which plops out the end.  theoretically it's unlimited!  but because of the half-life of the chemical catalysts, each reaction requires twice as much energy as the one before.
plotted:
	041041;  assassination is plotted
plotting:
	even now, your trusted wife is plotting to destroy that which you hold most dear!
ploy:
	 minty freshness?  what a scam! it's just a ploy by the gum industry.
pluck:
	  pluck from 
plucked:
	woman at left, behind gax, looks on disapprovingly,eyebrows slightly raised, her eyes fixed on the aliens as she hears his reaction.  gax, just left of center, holding his walking stick in his right hand like moses' rod, does not appear any too enthused to see the aliens.  on the right, the two aliens, with bodies like plucked uncooked chickens except with armlike appendages instead of wings, ending in two grotesque long ced fingers, stare fixedly up at gax as he makes his pronouncement.  the bulging eyes of one show dismay; the other looks shocked or startled.
plumb:
	 begone, woman. the depths of the soul i must plumb alone.
plumber:
	"directions. 1. if the box you have obtained is larger than the prescribed size, cut it down to size. we have done extensive testing and our size is unequivocally the best. if your box needs to be watertight (say, if some of your unfinished projects involve plumbing, rainwater reclamation, or crab-husbandry) be sure to seal the new seams you are creating with plumber's goop. also take care to cut straight so that your seams will join smoothly. really 80% of this project is getting the seams right. the rest is just putting stuff in a box."
plumes:
	keith billy swerved to avoid hitting a coyote and ran the chevelle off the road.  great plumes of dust, lit red by the setting sun.  we never saw the hill.  we never saw the cliff.
plump:
	a man is bringing a plump woman a box of alcoholic beverages.
plums:
	410410 , perhaps, plums are eaten
plunder:
	we had a plan, stanley.  we were going to go to the land of the giants and plunder their kingdom!
plunge:
	...alfred and the snakes plunge off the nearby cliff.
pluralistic:
	platonic friends?  pluralistic ignorance?  planar geometrics?  planck's constant?  plastic bags that could suffocate children?
pm:
	caption  airport pickup zone, 1235 pm
pneumonia:
	157157;  pneumonia seems certain
po:
	iqbal  po-
pocketing:
	reg  i can't compete with you folks!  weirdest thing that ever happened to me down at the factory was a guy ratted me out for pocketing misformed o-rings off the line an' takin' 'em home for "illicit purposes."
pocketwatch:
	 the color guard is nervously tittering.  the brass band has fainted from exertion.  the mayor is beginning to check his pocketwatch and fidget with his sash.
pod:
	- what?  no! / it's a television isolation pod.  (sicko)
podcasting:
	general you're facing charges of posting joke movie trailers on youtube; six counts of thinking you're a band because you have a myspace; and felony podcasting.
poetic:
	chris  i was hoping this would be all poetic.  last peaches on the tree, every other branch bare.  gramma's last gift to us.
poetry:
	girl if everybody gets to turn their poetry into a lucrative career, hadn't we better hope someone decides to take up sewage treatment as a hobby?
pogos:
	iqbal  sir this camel is totally incapable of any pogo.  its feet is never fit on a human pogo, and quadruped camel pogos is a thing science does not invented yet.
poined:
	ole so where's all the oil?  why are gas prices at record highs?   shouldn't poined iraqi oil be flooding the u.s. market?
pointing:
	walter (pointing to the elephant)  that part looks pretty uneven.
pointy:
	 not pictured wwi-era german officers in pointy helmets, fakirs, stripes-wearing prisoners complete with shackles and iron balls, larry flynt
poised:
	for years it seemed like nobody could beat fifty percent--coolidge, pierce, eisenhower, reagan, you know all those tired old names--but obama's poised to shatter that record!
poisonous:
	wendy our flesh is poisonous to gaxian biology!
poke:
	guido you can't talk!   i jinxed you!  pinch poke you owe me a coke!
pokes:
	man pokes head into panel; looks at cat. cat daintly raises paw. sixteenth notes return to background of panel.
polarizer:
	isaac  the internet is the great polarizer.
poles:
	 mounted on long poles to reach the ceiling
poli:
	your title is "the { chrono, neuro, aero, cosmo, reve, necro, cyber, astro, psycho, steam, meta, black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, war} s."
policed:
	carlos our nations are kept distinct by means of impassable canyons, policed by savage animals who devour trespassers.
policing:
	 we know the corporations are bad at self-policing. let's hope they're just as bad at self-firefighting.
politeness:
	"no. we're kept at arm's length by the kabuki of politeness. we have to roleplay as people who aren't invisible connected, pretending we actually don't know everything we know. and for what? so we can talk about the weather with someone we deeply admire?"
politician:
	which spurs him into conflict with { a megalomaniacal dictator, a government conspiracy, a profit-obsessed corporation, a sneering wizard, supernatural monsters, computer viruses made real, murderous robots, an army led by a sadist, forces that encourage conformity, a charismatic politician on the rise, humanity's selfish nature, his own insecurity vis-a-vis girls
politicians:
	otto all our money has a history.  bribes paid to politicians...hush money paid to victims...drugs and even human beings bought and sold...that money makes its way into our banks.  it carries negativity with it.  someone's starting a business, or buying toys for their baby?  they don't want iran-contra money.  they want nice money.  money with positive energy.
polk:
	- how about genghis khan swanson.  idi amin swanson.  james k. polk swanson.  rudolf diesel swanson.
polka:
	malcolm  really loud background noise.  like waterfalls, or jungle birds, or polka music, or all of the above.
pollinization:
	it's okay to experiment with cross-pollinization.
polls:
	father katie, honey, you're being very silly.  jules is a turtle. / the polls close in an hour.  at a dead sprint he'd barely make it to the kitchen.
pollutants:
	chuck  sometimes it feels impossible to do anything healthy.  like there's no way a society as complex and populous as ours can function at scale without inevitably filling our bodies and lives with cancer-causing pollutants.
polyphonic:
	man 1 aunt zelda was one of the original members of polyphonic spree
poncho:
	a kind of poncho is shown. gossamer waterproof garments. get the genuine! beware of worthless imitations! rival garments are made of acid-treated poison cloth. ours are safe and nurturing to your babylike skin. don't you deserve not to have your skin corroded off by the competition? masochists need not respond. we don't want your business. this is a nice place. gossamer clothing co, 28 devonshire st., boston, ma.
ponder:
	 many more mysteries to ponder at 
pondered:
	005005;  riches are pondered
pony:
	- why you always gotta be clownin? you and that stoopid pony!
pooched:
	evie i'm pooched, love.  i'm heading up to snoozyville.
poodle:
	 you know how i used to be all gaga over that poodle down the block? well, funny thing--now when i look at her all i can think is high maintenance
pools:
	- ...finally he says, "your hair is like spun gold - and your eyes, like magnificent pools of sapphire sunlight." i didn't know what to say.
pooped:
	mr. mikey i don't have candy!  all i can offer you is the peace of mind that only comes from knowing that if (god forbid) you're pooped on, you'll be a-ok.
poopin:
	pat i had so many plans for this year!  now look at me!  still poopin' where i freakin' sleep!
poopykins:
	gordon or maybe mr. poopykins has buttworms.
population:
	- you there! have you seen my son go by? he's infected by a terrible virus that will kill one-third of the earth's population, making five-eights of those remaining lactose intolerant while granting amazing super-powers to a quarter of the remainder!
populous:
	chuck  sometimes it feels impossible to do anything healthy.  like there's no way a society as complex and populous as ours can function at scale without inevitably filling our bodies and lives with cancer-causing pollutants.
porcelain:
	simon, who will...  free-range hen eggs delicately cracked into a porcelain bowl, the yolk and albumen whipped until smooth with a silver whisk, then seared on a steaming griddle until golden and fluffy.
pored:
	calvin oh, i've searched for it for ages.  pored through dusty stacks to no avail.  searched every catalog i could get my grubby paws on?but where i failed, lad, you prevailed.  tell me!  how did you locate it?  on which remove bookshelf did you peep its flaking spine?
porkpie:
	a man wearing a porkpie hat, sitting on a bench reading his newspaper. he removes his spectacles.
porn:
	man 1 well here we are at my aunt zelda's porn shop
pornography:
	man 2 the world's only victorian pornography store
portal:
	stumbles across a(n) { magic diadem, arcane prophecy, dusty tome, crazy old man, alien artifact, enchanted sword, otherworldly portal, dream-inducing drug, encrypted data feed, time-traveling soldier, exiled angel, talking fish
ported:
	 if i no longer walked from place to place, but rather was ported about by the scurrying of forty tiny legs, pulling my stiff, upright body from place to place entirely in opposition to any will i might express?
possession:
	a gardening tool is just any possession you don't mind irreparably soiling, charles
possiblsnarf:
	 oh please!  i couldn't possiblsnarf glarp nom nom blarg chomp chew charmp grahmwragfgh could we get some napkins over here?
poster:
	a poster reads "a codified set of the builder's, crafter's makers rules." a list follows
posterity:
	551551;  a tale is recounted for posterity
posting:
	general you're facing charges of posting joke movie trailers on youtube; six counts of thinking you're a band because you have a myspace; and felony podcasting.
potentially:
	barry  and chainsaws, which could potentially be used to dismember everybody!
potted:
	rick [emerging from a potted plant] aha
poultry:
	037037;  poultry is referenced
pounce:
	  pounce on 
pound:
	- i swear, some day it's like you want to go back to the pound.
pounding:
	gaston  ooh, despite a pounding headache, a fine morning it is.  i trust the year is going well so far?
pout:
	731731; when in doubt, pout
pouty:
	- and it has been, despite your pouty attitude!
powerful:
	gax i should warn you - it's extremely powerful.
powerhouse:
	maggie so...in twenty years the chinese business world will be flooded with these kids!  if we want to stay one step ahead, we have to get billy in good stead for the next big powerhouse.  brazil. / john "one step ahead?"  you mean, if we want to one-up millie spangler. / maggie she's beat us on homebirth.  she's beat us on preschool.  john.  this is our only chance.
powering:
	a block at the bottom reads ""--bottom line--", with some aspects of coal-powering your life outlined underneath
powerless:
	eli  how can you be so calm?  don't you just feel powerless?
pox:
	a picture is shown that says "dr. johnson's $30 health-lift." if you suffer from palsy, we will treat you. if you are afflicted with pox, we will address you. even if you are right now dying of tuberculosis, call us. will you be healed? almost certainly not. but we will talk with you so you're not lonely. (as we are.)
pphbllppttbb:
	hector  <<pphbllppttbb>>
pr:
	annie every now and then there's, like, a gasp, pr some sort of weird shuffling?
practically:
	chris' eyes bulge as his head is forced back painfully far.  his jaw is practically unhinged and his throat is swollen grotesquely.  a mass protrudes from his mouth, and atop the mass is a banner reading thanks.
pragmatic:
	radislov what if i told you i'd written an investment book not geared towards gullible suckers?  one specifically for cynical, pragmatic types?
praise:
	clarence so, let us all give praise to saturn for another joyous winter solstice.
praises:
	 sing your praises at 
pram:
	leonard (pushing an empty pram) pardon me!  you wouldn't happen to have seen a baby around here, would you?
prancing:
	waiter  let's see...rusty tricycle, uncleburglar, steelhouse stiltwalker, boogerbrau, prancing minotaur, dunderschnauzen, chairfarter stout, and aardshark.
prankster:
	 oh that hamilton what a prankster
preboiler:
	felix wearing a jetpack check it out!  i just finished the upgrade to my starpincher!  put in a double-chamber preboiler and a hundred-torque turnvalve.  zero to forty-five in a click point seven.  hah!
precede:
	 you can get away with pretty much anything if you precede it with 'according to frontier law'
precedence:
	marc oh, i thought it was obvious when i said "i don't let society's frivolous protocols take precedence over my personal values."
precedent:
	 actually there is precedent - op.cit. canada v. north, et al.
precepts:
	 'it exhibits a striking lack of comprehension of even the most rudimentary precepts of fire safety'
preciousness:
	leon gently caressing the horse buttercup you can't be a veterinarian if you love animals.  always seeing them in pain...and so often knowing there's nothing you can do... ...it would deaden your sensitivity to the preciousness of all the earth's living things.
precise:
	student webster's dictionary.  but you have to read it in a very precise order. teacher well, one more book to ban from schools.
preclude:
	nate  that does not preclude its being full of drugs.
predictable:
	ariel misbehavior has become his palette, our apartment his canvas, in a grand, grotesque installation - featuring us as predictable foils, our fury as much a deliberate part of the work as each precisely-browned fiber of shag.  more than a simple befoulment - this is a befoulment of order, a metaphorical poop-smear on the very notion of animal subjugation.
predicting:
	 he came to a level where you just keep dying without any way of predicting why or when or how. the developers call it 'profound'
prefer:
	lincoln i rather think i'd prefer to be attacked by some sort of poisoned razor bees to be stung, poisoned, and lacerated to death than to be snuffed by a common poor person.
preferable:
	johnson who says it's preferable to be awake?  pardon me if i relish my nightly visits to a lyrical realm of magic beauty.  why is that something i have to apologize for?  so i don't like leaving that all behind.  who would?
preferably:
	 preferably gift cards please because seriously a mandolin? seriously?
pregnancy:
	 surgeon general's warning consumption of tobacco products may complicate pregnancy
premise:
	clive the premise of the ancestral diet is to eat foods native to the homelands of your ancestors.
premium:
	 premium goodies 
premiums:
	sanders i'm fully covered.  it's right there in the policy.  my premiums are all paid up.
prep:
	- back in earth-prep boot camp, they didn't say you'd be mean.
prepaid:
	ben  that rebate is issued as a prepaid visa card.
preparedness:
	057057;  preparedness is celebrated
preparer:
	jeeves  let's see...dentist, car insurance, income tax preparer, alumni association.
prepares:
	dr. marcus prepares a formula as benson watches.
prequel:
	stu man it just hit me that "sex and the city" is a prequel to "golden girls"
prerogative:
	060060;  parental prerogative is exercised
preschool:
	maggie so...in twenty years the chinese business world will be flooded with these kids!  if we want to stay one step ahead, we have to get billy in good stead for the next big powerhouse.  brazil. / john "one step ahead?"  you mean, if we want to one-up millie spangler. / maggie she's beat us on homebirth.  she's beat us on preschool.  john.  this is our only chance.
prescient:
	 prescient pasty 
prescribes:
	hugo but whenever some external force, such as the state, commands us under penalty to to do or not do certain things - isn't that negating our personal choice to do or not do that thing?  in other words, removing our free will.  and isn't free will and moral agency the defining characteristic of humanity?  thus, i must reject any "law" that prescribes my actions as incompatible with my very nature as a reasoning being!
presentation:
	jamaal  come on!  the heroism!  the sweeping vistas!  the unironic presentation of cut-and-dried morality!
preserving:
	bart we'll be up front hearing people cough and shuffle around, while cameras all around us are capturing instants, preserving the most fleeting of glances, showing us (and those to come after us) more than we could ever notice on our own.  in a way, the day when everyone gathers and performs the ceremony is simply a run-through for the cameras.  the documentary evidence is what lasts forever.
presidency:
	stig oh, man!  if obama wins the presidency...talk about historic!
presidential:
	think of it!  and the first presidential surname with more vowels than consonants!
presto:
	clara then, abandon all dignity by hawking your product shamelessly to gullible people.   presto!  profit.
presumed:
	 and now i can't use my idea about time-traveling cavemen who team up with a race of bird-humans to set up a sham wizard school in the american west in a plot to groom orphan boys to impersonate various missing and presumed dead heirs to massive fortunes around the world because somebody already did it better
pretzels:
	desperation reeks from these walls.  this morning, you ate great handfuls of pretzels through thick veils of tears.  you will do the same tomorrow.
prevailed:
	calvin oh, i've searched for it for ages.  pored through dusty stacks to no avail.  searched every catalog i could get my grubby paws on?but where i failed, lad, you prevailed.  tell me!  how did you locate it?  on which remove bookshelf did you peep its flaking spine?
prevalence:
	559559; the prevalence of internal logic
prevents:
	446446;  a toy prevents against neglect
prey:
	wolf you'll feel life energy the way you feel a breeze now.it runs thick and real in the blood of your prey. and you can drink it. come with me. it's a gift i want to give to you. forever.
preying:
	se—or eugene hey! scumbag!  get a real job instead of preying on people!
priceless:
	jeff i like "the revolutionary new plaque-vac gives you the priceless gift of more time with your loved ones."
prick:
	- i'm deaf, you insensitive prick.
pried:
	projects are stackable. it's not that i'm starting something new before finishing something old - i'm nesting the new project inside the old. if it has screws, they shall be turned. if it has bolts, they shall be loosened. if it has rivets, they may get along for a while without being pried open, but that probably won't last.
primacy:
	father each day you must reassert your primacy anew over your own destiny. and all the while, your body will daily discover new and horrid frailties in its slow, inexorable march towards death.
primarily:
	 barnyard chancellor is primarily a ceremonial position anyway. the viscount of the hayloft has all the real power.
primary:
	- hello, may i speak to primary telecom decision maker in the house?
primate:
	i'd try the tunnel before i try leaping from limb to limb like...like a primate.
princesses:
	jack and on one billboard we'll show all the princesses with the tagline 'girls gone medieval'!
principality:
	woman i don't even know where his principality is!
principled:
	glen criminy, aren't you just principled.
privileges:
	juan well i don't appreciate the many freedoms and privileges afforded by living in a post-industrial society!
prizes:
	 there are no prizes for being a decent person.  there are, however, several for eating cakes of butter, or choking down an imperial quart of milk in 3.2 seconds (1978 record)
pro:
	jimbo listen, '5.  you think you could do me a solid on this?  we'd put you right up front on a major invoice.  yeah.  unit price.  you'd be a multiplier.  big job.  that's why i called you.  thanks, '5.  you're a pro.  i'll dial you in.  see you in excel.
probability:
	carlos i do not know why this seems unlikely.  clearly we occupy a universe  it has occurred.  what is the probability that you wore a hat today?  one point zero.  it is certain.
probe:
	 probe deeper into 
probiotic:
	helene can i interest you in our new organic probiotic gluten-free raw energy bar?
probly:
	george washington ...all i gotta do is just touch my arm - and a million skin cells fly off. a million of 'em! jus' hangin' in the air! probly breathin' 'em up. you ever think of that
proboscis:
	dean an anteater actually, my proboscis allows me to reach into narrow openings to retrieve vari
procedure:
	i know you're new, so ask one of the guys to give you a rundown on our optimizating procedure.
proceed:
	 we are at a loss as to how to proceed
processes:
	george washington and? did you know there are over six octillion processes happening in your body every second? if i had an electron microscope i could tell 'em thanks! thanks for all the hard work! but i don't. cuz of martha.
processing:
	in the soap processing plant, the contaminants become clear molten soap is being poured through a gleeful man's crack on its way to becoming new bars
processor:
	greg let's say there's an expansion bay on my phone.  i can buy third-party modules specific to my needs.  maybe i want a digital tape measure and a level.  maybe i want a micrometer or a magnifier.  sometimes these are things i have to carry with me.  why can't they be on my phone, linked to the processor and the camera and the bluetooth chip?  i could turn my phone into a scanner or a nutritional scale or camera binoculars or fishing radar.  my examples aren't that broad-reaching, but if it's open-source then any tool a sufficiently nerdy subculture can't live without, they'll develop for themselves.  whaddya think?  good idea, huh?
proclaims:
	a large page contains several advertisements. a banner at the top proclaims "you need all of it" "please be so kind as to agree"
procrastihibernation:
	614614; procrastihibernation
procrastinate:
	dan look, i've put in a lot of late nights for you.  i don't complain 'cause you pay me pretty well.  and every hour i'm here, i'm just watching an invisible odometer roll over in my head.  i've got no problem taking your money.  but i don't like working on your projects.  they're pointless to me, so i procrastinate; then i end up rushed and frustrated.  it's all stress i don't need.
produced:
	the accused kneels and scissors are produced.
producers:
	 no, by putting food to the use it was sacrificed for--nourishing me--i am paying the karmic debt incurred by the food producers. it is a moral good!
production:
	- since you asked, i've been cast in the jackson high school production of "swan lake 2 the return of durant!" they said i was perfect for "hildy."
productivity:
	dan well, let's see.  i outlined my next couple projects, set up a filing system for my notes, and downloaded a productivity program...then i read an article about time management and filed it away in the new system...then brainstormed over instant-messenger for a while, while watching youtube clips for "inspiration."
profanity:
	you mean you're okay with intense sequences of violent action; liberal use of profanity, suggestive material, and drug references; and exactly one occurence of the "f" word?
professed:
	culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.
profession:
	glen i was hoping to perhaps parlay my expertise in ennui into some sort of lucrative public speaking profession.
professionalism:
	leon a better vet would be someone sociopathically indifferent to the suffering of god's creatures.  only then would he or she be able to maintain professionalism in the face of each day's crippling tragedy.
professionals:
	ross decades of scientific research have gone into making this the strongest, most potent gullible ever.  previously available only to industry professionals, i'm pleased to offer it now in a new, ultra-concentrated form ten times more potent than any gullible you already have.
professors:
	- people i went to school with are now lawyers, professors, business owners.  i just saw a doctor who looked young enough to be my kid.  it blows my mind.
profusely:
	 apologize profusely at 
prognostication:
	267267;  prognostication occurs
programmed:
	old  this is them!  the bad people i programmed you to kill!
programming:
	prof. mcgnty  looks like the ol' cooking robot still has a few bugs left in his programming!
programs:
	 the '96 plague class was the last of the experimental secondary-education programs
prohibit:
	king the bylaws of our experimental agrarian city-state expressly prohibit mischievous tampering with the natural order of living things!
prohibited:
	a hand holds a card indicating that bottles are prohibited
prohibitive:
	 joey had borrowed the money to buy the alpenhorn, it seems, whereas pete had always wanted an alpenhorn but had been stymied by the prohibitive cost
prohibits:
	- look, i understand if your faith prohibits you from acting against your conscience.
projectiles:
	 that's all fine but what about projectiles
proletariat:
	kris oh, yes. that's what they used to call me. before the proletariat revolution. before elvengrad. before the camps.
prolific:
	man 2 criminy! the taylors must have been prolific carders themselves. nobody receives that many cards unless they send twice as many.
prometheus:
	subhead  "the idea just came to me," says modern-day prometheus
promote:
	 kenmore erects giant fridge to memorialize him, self-promote
promoting:
	larry stands outside, hawking his self-promoting merchandise.
promotional:
	promotional apr
prompt:
	judge finkins thank you for your prompt attention in this matter.
prompted:
	 it was the mental image of the deer that prompted the cognitive leap
prompting:
	culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.
promptly:
	we have a long night ahead of us, so it is essential that we start promptly.
pronoun:
	 seriously, 'blasphemous pronoun'?
pronounced:
	 the waiter pronounced it 'sall-mons'
pronouncement:
	woman at left, behind gax, looks on disapprovingly,eyebrows slightly raised, her eyes fixed on the aliens as she hears his reaction.  gax, just left of center, holding his walking stick in his right hand like moses' rod, does not appear any too enthused to see the aliens.  on the right, the two aliens, with bodies like plucked uncooked chickens except with armlike appendages instead of wings, ending in two grotesque long ced fingers, stare fixedly up at gax as he makes his pronouncement.  the bulging eyes of one show dismay; the other looks shocked or startled.
pronouncements:
	dawn too late!  old news!  health care is the biggest problem facing our society since dukakis rode a tank!  grave pronouncements are hitting the media at rates unseen since the cuban missile crisis!
proofread:
	hatless proofread the resume a dozen times.
propel:
	carlos it requires extraordinary power to propel an object of great mass across the galaxy!  so we convert much of the matter to energy and store it in compact batteries.
propensity:
	and her { wacky pet, welding gear, closet full of assault rifles, reference book, cleavage, facility with magic, condescending tone, discomfort in formal wear, propensity for being captured,
prophecy:
	stumbles across a(n) { magic diadem, arcane prophecy, dusty tome, crazy old man, alien artifact, enchanted sword, otherworldly portal, dream-inducing drug, encrypted data feed, time-traveling soldier, exiled angel, talking fish
proportionate:
	a large, bearded man is approached by a small, armored elephant carrying a howdah with four passengers.  perched on the elephant's trunk is a small woman (about two heads tall in relation to the man), proportionate to the men in the howdah.
proportions:
	hulda i wouldn't know the correct proportions!  it wouldn't be the same!
proposition:
	508508;  a proposition is made
propositions:
	katie okay, c'mon, sample ballot page eight propositions.  shall the state chapter be amended and ordinance adopted to fund a bond measure allocated for infrastructural repairs?
propriety:
	043043;  propriety is abandoned
pros:
	card  season's greetings from your friends at ace tire pros.
prosecutor:
	the prosecutor dropped the charges under mysterious circumstances.  why you trying to disenfranchise his minority?
prospectus:
	hortense did you get a chance to look at the prospectus we emailed you?
prosperity:
	donny last year, your brother sacrificed himself to save the planet. / thank god he was able to destroy the alien robots controlling our lending markets and restore the world to prosperity!
prostate:
	doctor you have terminal prostate cancer.
prosthetic:
	he's riding a skateboard and pushing himself along with a prosthetic leg on the end of a pole.
protagonist:
	with the help of a { sarcastic female techno-geek, tomboyish female mechanic, shape-shifting female assassin, leather-clad female in shades, girl who's always loved him, bookish female scholar with mousy brown hair, cherubic girl with pigtails and spunk, female who inexplicably becomes attracted to the damaged protagonist for unstated reasons
protect:
	joanne and rather than park our cars tandem, i'm installing a hoist that will store the cars one atop the other.  long-term, i have plans to build a stadium-style rolling roof to protect our entire property from hailstorms.
protecting:
	- you really believe that the super-rich are protecting the rest of us from intergalactic annihilation?
protects:
	whyte  the minotaur that protects the village?  you just want me to kill him so you can eat the villagers!
protuberance:
	 the crack of wheel on skull was heard for three miles around. travelers fell into ditches. farmwives clutched their hens close. it is even said that a baby born that very instant later developed a mild round protuberance on the wrists and ankles that has never been fully explained
proudly:
	a tall man stands proudly, speaking to a shorter man in a fur cap.
provider:
	- sir, are you happy with the service from your long distance provider?
provides:
	 do you like playing pirate?  do you bask in the flush of power it provides?  the joy of living totally for pleasure, completely outside the law?
proving:
	- yes, but it's proving very hard to keep.
provisions:
	sergeant  rather grim, sir.  provisions are running short and the weather's getting colder.
provocateur:
	ariel he scooched his butt across the carpet in the shape of a crop circle.  he has taken disobedience to the level of a provocateur.
provoke:
	coin-purse gun.  a weapon to keep handy at all times of day or night.  fend off bothersome insects without danger of injury to others.  provoke comforting touches before boarding aircraft.  $2.00
provoked:
	475475;  trouble is both avoided, and provoked
provokes:
	236236;  melon provokes mayhem
prowess:
	514514;  the waiter shows his prowess
prowling:
	she lurks at the corners of vision, always circling, always prowling.  she does not let herself be seen.
prowls:
	a bear in an ill-fitting prussian military helmet prowls about aimlessly.
prowlybucket:
	walt we're still reporting on the tragic case of forty miners trapped in a cave-in.  with us live is mine foreman eustace prowlybucket.
prrrrrr:
	cat <<prrrrrr>>
prude:
	crusty bill everyone less promiscuous than me is a prude!  everyone more promiscuous is a slut!
prune:
	valerie i'll get the prune juice.
prussian:
	a bear in an ill-fitting prussian military helmet prowls about aimlessly.
pry:
	mack  then, we'll pry off all the rain gutters, lashing them end-to-end with bits of the ladder using sticks as splints.
pseudonym:
	 i will begin writing under my future-pseudonym at once!  oh look i've already written an entire bookshelf!
pssswsss:
	gax whispering to rob pssswsss stssstsswss
psyche:
	matt my psyche is liable to push me into success.  simply to spite itself.
psychiatric:
	chuck  but everything today is so aberrant.  our food has no nutrition.  our kids are hyperallergic.  everyone's on psychiatric drugs.
psychologies:
	davy i am immunes to every hurtful psychologies!
psychologist:
	giovanni it's unhealthy!  listen, here's my card.  i'm a psychologist specializing in anxiety-causing obsessions.  give me a call.
psychopathic:
	hans apparently deep down i consider you a psychopathic ostrich farmer.
psychoplasma:
	  now come along, i have a hundred bottles for you to fill with luminous psychoplasma from your fingertips.
pubes:
	man 2 sorry, dude, better stick to the traditional method.   writin' angry letters claimin' you found pubes in the o. j.
pubescent:
	 <<sigh>> i'm getting tired of having to explain this every time. a pedophile is attracted to pre-pubescent children. (eww.) i'm a hebephile. i'm attracted to adolescents. there is a significant difference.
publication:
	fur collar  the recontextualization of not just disposable but disposed of victorian imagery in the milieu of 21st century web-based publication and distribution is a baldly ironic statement of luddite intransigence, but with a humanizing layer of nostalgia and longing for vanished standards of craftsmanship and civility
publisher:
	- so, the only logical explanation is that the publisher is spying on me! watching my every move, sharting my every emotion... my privacy is gone! my civil liberties violated! i hope my hair looks okay.
publishing:
	 tooth magazine folded in '89 when advertisers withdrew their support following the publishing of a controversial illustration featuring c. everett koop driving a bulldozer through tianenmen square. the caption 'fluoride uber alles'
puckered:
	horse  he's not breathing.  his skin is cold and puckered.  he smells like algae and meat-rot.
pudding:
	morty  then you should totally come over.  scrooge gave us way too much figgy pudding.
puffed:
	man stands with chest puffed out.
pugilist:
	morrissey a large pugilist now you listen to me, monsarto!  things work a certain way 'round here!  we fixin' to keep it so!
pulchritudinous:
	 "my pulchritudinous feminine contours"
pulitzer:
	otto redeeming it.  [to dave]  ah, yes.  looks like these dollars in your account were once used for a hooker binge on a ceo's yacht.  right now i have einstein's patent office wages for a 15% commission - or jfk's pulitzer prize winnings for twenty.
pulped:
	everyone has experienced trouble related to insufficient potato consumption. but how to make time for the labor involved in regular kitchen preparation? with the potato injector, the time for fretting is past. using surgical-grade tubing, the injector pipes pulped potato nectar into your body intravenously.
pumps:
	chuck  a long life of what?  diabetes?  wasting away to nothing as modern medicine pumps morphine into an ever-hollowing shell of what once was my life?
punchy:
	the only ideas really able to take root in our culture are short, punchy approximations.
punctuated:
	culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.
punish:
	lawyer would you be interested in participating in a class action? to punish the zipper company for is cavalier pursuit of never-ending profits at the expense of ordinary, hardworking, zipper-reliant citizens like yourself?
puns:
	drew why am i itching?  oh, that's right - i'm horribly allergic to puns.
puppeteer:
	terry faithfully-recreated goals.  realistic dreams.  comes with a full set of aspirations, that, as the puppeteer, you can fulfill or crush at your discretion.  "i wanted to be an ice-cream flavor tester!"  "not even a superstar!  just a solid 9-to-5 at dreyer's that pays the bills."
puppets:
	rhonda there ain't no fat man in a big red suit.  i mean there's men, in malls around the world, but they ain't santa.  they're just doubles.  decoys.  like saddam.  agents.  puppets on a string.  on my string.
purchased:
	279279;  is purchased marmoset coverage
purchases:
	113113;  leo purchases faeces
purest:
	227227; relationships distilled to their purest form
purge:
	 binge and purge at 
purperfect:
	 okay, then next i have glonder and glondee. also glonded, glonding, and glondt which is of course the purperfect
purr:
	- sure. see, i can feed it this dead cat, and it'll purr like a kitten. pardon the expression.
purview:
	  ma'am, as a duly sworn butt inspector i cannot let any slight within my purview go unrectified.
pushed:
	 look, i got problems too! this settlement has pushed me into a very inconvenient tax bracket!
pushes:
	farmer reggie halloween has gotten too corporate!  big candy pushes its sugar-laden garbage as the only sensible choice to razor-bladed apples!  another example of big business using its marketing muscle to destroy the small entrepreneur!
putter:
	  cryogenics conceives of the future as florida  a place where old people go to just putter around
puzzles:
	 yes! theoretically there's no ceiling to how elaborate the series of puzzles could become.
puzzling:
	sammy some serious questions!  and some puzzling doubts!
pygmy:
	- it is. jim sent me a pygmy bride.
pyramid:
	kenneth you're trying to start up that pyramid scam again, aren't you?
pyrex:
	young  the, um, pyrex mixing cylinder showed signs of use.
pyro:
	sylvia  how sick are you?  do i have time to get a pyro license?
qerexz:
	same as first panel, except the empty boxes are filled in with a q, and x and a z.  21 down is now qerexz and 39 across is now eaexea.
quadboot:
	inventor behold the quadboot! 
quadrant:
	 according to the topline, tabbies age 3-6 love the pawns -- but we still can't get any quadrant on those calicos
quadrillions:
	karl so the first draw - when the tube seems "full" - requires 0.0001 units of squeezing force.  the second, 0.0002 units, etc.  it's easy at first, but that doubling gets serious after a while.  eventually it takes trillions of units of force!  quadrillions!
quadruped:
	iqbal  sir this camel is totally incapable of any pogo.  its feet is never fit on a human pogo, and quadruped camel pogos is a thing science does not invented yet.
quadrupedal:
	todd  our own line of bubble suits!  quadrupedal bubble suits!
quake:
	geno your shoulders quake.  your arms give out.  the chair is heavy.  so very, very heavy.
qualifies:
	- no way, man. i said homicide or better, and that clearly qualifies.
qualify:
	 this is sufficient to qualify for the vigilante hero placard.
quantified:
	230230;  an infant is quantified
quarantined:
	ashton  everything's been quarantined!  you don't have any in your house, do you?
quart:
	 there are no prizes for being a decent person.  there are, however, several for eating cakes of butter, or choking down an imperial quart of milk in 3.2 seconds (1978 record)
quartet:
	a japanese father sits before a quartet of sumo wrestlers.  a son, dressed in traditional japanese robes, approaches.
quay:
	rev. king his mama wanted to call him quay'shawn.  i said, woman!
queer:
	 i think dogs watch more 'queer eye' than we think
quentin:
	quentin somebody, help!  i think she's having a stroke!
questionable:
	088088;  ty employs questionable methods
quigley:
	quigley (a dino-turkey) your skills at car repair are woefully inadequate
quirk:
	but instead, a chorus of encouragement from other lunatics strokes his quirk into an obsession that takes over his identity!
quirky:
	- one thing you should know about me is that i'm crazy!  i mean, i am a nut!  everybody's always telling me, shirley, you are so quirky!  and i'm all, i know!
quo:
	wishful spending trying to maintain some obsolete status quo is like running into the future with one leg tied behind your back!
quon:
	1. i own close to 100 copies of vanilla ice's autobiography (when i learned it was ghost-written by his manager tommy quon, i lost all interest in being a distributor).
quote:
	 i have been told that my aura is quote-musky-unquote
quotes:
	449449;  'food' is placed in quotes
qwerty:
	'qwerty.'
rabies:
	probably not rabies after all. 
races:
	the train races through a town, freed from the confines of railway tracks.
racial:
	jill oh yeah.  and i hope you've got a budget for litigation defense - your ad materials are full of terms that some would consider highly offensive racial slurs.
racist:
	- that was a test, you racist bastard.
rack:
	jeremy  no bike rack?  let's lock to the meter i guess.
radar:
	greg let's say there's an expansion bay on my phone.  i can buy third-party modules specific to my needs.  maybe i want a digital tape measure and a level.  maybe i want a micrometer or a magnifier.  sometimes these are things i have to carry with me.  why can't they be on my phone, linked to the processor and the camera and the bluetooth chip?  i could turn my phone into a scanner or a nutritional scale or camera binoculars or fishing radar.  my examples aren't that broad-reaching, but if it's open-source then any tool a sufficiently nerdy subculture can't live without, they'll develop for themselves.  whaddya think?  good idea, huh?
radars:
	otto too well.  i flew too high, too close to the sun.  i got on some radars.
radiation:
	- i didn't mean for it to turn out this way. what with the chemo and the radiation and the hair loss and all. so... i'm sorry.
radiator:
	and your record player! and you battle-ax! just take back everything you lent me! take your globe and your radiator and your luggage and your first wife!
radicalism:
	father i think the realities of the political process probably mainstream the radicalism out of anybody, just in the name of being able to get anything accomplished at all.
radiogrammephonimat:
	john and marilu are listening to a base-ball game over the radiogrammephonimat.
radiologist:
	doctor i showed your charts to a radiologist, an oncologist, and my kid sister, who once got a b+ in geography.
radium:
	bum i regret to inform you that you have now suffered a lethal dose of radium
raffle:
	marcus! that's not the money from the charity raffle, is it?
rages:
	a legionnaire speaks in hushed tones with a tiny triceratops, perched on his bayonet.  in the background, a battle rages.
ragged:
	josh but viscous bile drips from their ragged flesh, searing the earth in pancake-sized globs of corroding
ragging:
	radislov i hear you've been ragging on people who have the audacity to sell self-improvement products!
raid:
	olaf this is a raid you shall all perish by the hand of olaf the - oh, wait, what's that - that's new
railroads:
	yuri i do not understand how human beings functioned before the invention of pharmaceuticals.  the pyramids!  the great wall of china!  railroads crossing continents!
railway:
	the train races through a town, freed from the confines of railway tracks.
rainbow:
	 the rainbow ends at 
rainwater:
	"directions. 1. if the box you have obtained is larger than the prescribed size, cut it down to size. we have done extensive testing and our size is unequivocally the best. if your box needs to be watertight (say, if some of your unfinished projects involve plumbing, rainwater reclamation, or crab-husbandry) be sure to seal the new seams you are creating with plumber's goop. also take care to cut straight so that your seams will join smoothly. really 80% of this project is getting the seams right. the rest is just putting stuff in a box."
raisers:
	ms. morton unless i'm mistaken, senator, you served quite a few margaritas at your fund-raisers.  went over well, did they?  now you need to do something for us.
raises:
	man pokes head into panel; looks at cat. cat daintly raises paw. sixteenth notes return to background of panel.
raisin:
	julio ?nope!  i nullify your raisin bran attack with my lean cuisine ingredients list!  that's fifty points and now, you have to go outside!
raj:
	a soldier of the raj leaps over the table, jabbing at francis with his bayonet.
rake:
	 rake it in 
raking:
	teddy  so you're the ones at airports and sports arenas raking customers over the coals for needing to eat!
ram:
	mahmoud we could, like, ram the space shuttle with a blimp.
ramble:
	man #2 thank you! it's fascinating hearing you ramble passionately yet only half-coherently about something you read online somewhere.
rambling:
	 i will send them both a furious, rambling email explaining in detail how carefree i actually am
ranch:
	 at ihop, ketchup and water and lemons and crackers and ranch dressing are all free
rancher:
	bruce she was a traveler.  taken in by a hog rancher back when this used to be farmland?
rancid:
	 alternately, it is a zeppelin full of rancid milk
randomly:
	daughter we seem to run into each other randomly all the time!
ranges:
	- your body mass index is within healthy ranges
raped:
	for any intern thou hast raped, thou must forfeit one sick day.
rapidly:
	the latest goods that you cannot exist without  "take it apart" tinkerbox parts - tools shiny sundries designed to rapidly expend your working capital.  best prices of the season/enclose cash with order
rapport:
	hatless even did that "mirroring" thing with body language to build rapport!
rascally:
	chad  yes!  that's it!  the rascally duck!  thank you!
rascals:
	266266;  rascals attempt to woo
raspberry:
	darrell iced decaf grande raspberry soy no-whip light-ice mocha!
raspy:
	 raspy tongues at 
rat:
	585585; a rat has many hobbies
ratatatatatablam:
	<<ratatatatatablam>> olaf is cut clear in half by the "taffy machine"
ration:
	"barney," he say, "times are tough.  you think everyone don't want plaid pants?  but we got to ration them trousers, barney.
rationalizing:
	woman or do you simply take action however you please, rationalizing your worldview into alignment?
rats:
	two rats.  one holds a tuba.
ratted:
	reg  i can't compete with you folks!  weirdest thing that ever happened to me down at the factory was a guy ratted me out for pocketing misformed o-rings off the line an' takin' 'em home for "illicit purposes."
rattle:
	alt text fine. wintergreen? how about custom packages of tic tacs? folks can rattle them when they want us to kiss! --jason are you trying to give me a migraine
ratttrap:
	dr. helfsquiggle uh, yeah, hombre!  i've already met up with "ratttrap" from the old listserv.
raw:
	helene can i interest you in our new organic probiotic gluten-free raw energy bar?
rays:
	mrs. detwiler lies on a bed; jeb stands over here with a crosscut saw. / jeb how are you feeling, mrs. detwiler? / i'm just heading over to review your x-rays.  we'll start surgery in about an hour...is something the matter?
reaching:
	greg let's say there's an expansion bay on my phone.  i can buy third-party modules specific to my needs.  maybe i want a digital tape measure and a level.  maybe i want a micrometer or a magnifier.  sometimes these are things i have to carry with me.  why can't they be on my phone, linked to the processor and the camera and the bluetooth chip?  i could turn my phone into a scanner or a nutritional scale or camera binoculars or fishing radar.  my examples aren't that broad-reaching, but if it's open-source then any tool a sufficiently nerdy subculture can't live without, they'll develop for themselves.  whaddya think?  good idea, huh?
readies:
	a mustachioed gentleman readies to strike a barrel-chested chap in the groin with a 5-iron.  behind the barrel-chested chap, a young boy stands with a hoop ready to catch whatever might fly off.
reagan:
	for years it seemed like nobody could beat fifty percent--coolidge, pierce, eisenhower, reagan, you know all those tired old names--but obama's poised to shatter that record!
realistic:
	terry faithfully-recreated goals.  realistic dreams.  comes with a full set of aspirations, that, as the puppeteer, you can fulfill or crush at your discretion.  "i wanted to be an ice-cream flavor tester!"  "not even a superstar!  just a solid 9-to-5 at dreyer's that pays the bills."
realities:
	father i think the realities of the political process probably mainstream the radicalism out of anybody, just in the name of being able to get anything accomplished at all.
realms:
	 dare you blow the mortality tuba?  it plays a note which resonates across the realms of life and death!
reap:
	 reap the benefits at 
rears:
	chris' throat bulges and his head rears back involuntarily.
reasoned:
	woman are you the sort of person who has a reasoned set of beliefs, and makes decisions based on them?
reasoning:
	hugo but whenever some external force, such as the state, commands us under penalty to to do or not do certain things - isn't that negating our personal choice to do or not do that thing?  in other words, removing our free will.  and isn't free will and moral agency the defining characteristic of humanity?  thus, i must reject any "law" that prescribes my actions as incompatible with my very nature as a reasoning being!
reassert:
	father each day you must reassert your primacy anew over your own destiny. and all the while, your body will daily discover new and horrid frailties in its slow, inexorable march towards death.
reassignment:
	 guys gender reassignment surgery is a very delicate subject for many people and i'll thank you not to trivialize it for a cheap gag okay seriously [
rebecca:
	492492;  rebecca laughs
rebel:
	 rebel 
rebelled:
	newspaper text some people have rebelled against this notion, and constantly keep on the move, busying themselves with the creation of novel problems and competing to find overly-elaborate ways to solve them. this magazine is our attempt to cash in on that demographic.
rebellious:
	old ant what with your absurd musical taste, generically rebellious nature, and unfamiliar/threatening media-consumption habits 
rebuffed:
	064064;  efforts are rebuffed
rebuffs:
	376376;  mindy rebuffs an entreaty
rebuke:
	jeff if only i could speak the name of the beast, i might rebuke her.  but its alien syllables slither past my tongue like a soapy worm.
recalibrate:
	- because you need to severely recalibrate your sense of what would be an "awesomely ironic vacation."
recalling:
	marc you know how they're always recalling products because they suddenly find out how toxic they are?   and they never seem to figure it out until chumps like us have been using the product for years?
recalls:
	143143;  pete recalls the past
recapturing:
	inventor friction-recapturing inner flywheel. water-resistant to 18 meters. sixty-seven individual servomotors. bluetooth built into the heel.
receipts:
	ken i would start by checking johann's expense accounts for hickory farms receipts.
reception:
	diane okay, i've hired the sketch artist for our wedding!  and bought little drawing pads for all the tables at the reception.
recesses:
	and may our souls commune as we explore the deep recesses of each other in the sanctity and anonymity of march moonlight!
recharge:
	 recharge 
recieved:
	general sir, i've recieved a number of complaints. i'm going to ask that you stop immediately.
recipes:
	mikey recipes are for the masses.  why do we have to be content with the recipe?  why can't we do something different?
reciprocate:
	edwin no, i thought she would reciprocate by getting me a darth vader mediation egg for the living room.
reclamation:
	"directions. 1. if the box you have obtained is larger than the prescribed size, cut it down to size. we have done extensive testing and our size is unequivocally the best. if your box needs to be watertight (say, if some of your unfinished projects involve plumbing, rainwater reclamation, or crab-husbandry) be sure to seal the new seams you are creating with plumber's goop. also take care to cut straight so that your seams will join smoothly. really 80% of this project is getting the seams right. the rest is just putting stuff in a box."
reclassified:
	ashton  brass has been reclassified a zone alpha deadly poison!  don't move, you might be infected!
reclined:
	guillermo reclined again yo i knew this would get you excited
recluse:
	phoebe  i want to become a recluse.
recognizable:
	 recognizable smells are specific combinations of airborne molecules called odorants. odorants are chemical vapors which must permeate a mucous membrane to bond with olfactory receptors.
recoil:
	 recoil in fear at 
recollections:
	amy  "although basic courtesy doesn't explain foreign genocide, highly-intuitive japanese kids let machines narrate old people's quiet recollections, seeking to ultimately vanquish wichita's xenophobic young zealots."
reconciliation:
	marvin my resentful attitude toward fatherhood will yield spiteful and maladjusted children. on my deathbed, i will plead with them for reconciliation. to no avail.
reconsiders:
	195195;  nicole reconsiders
recontextualization:
	fur collar  the recontextualization of not just disposable but disposed of victorian imagery in the milieu of 21st century web-based publication and distribution is a baldly ironic statement of luddite intransigence, but with a humanizing layer of nostalgia and longing for vanished standards of craftsmanship and civility
recontextualizing:
	alien girl whatcha doin, honey? / nerd hu oh, just taking some old art i found and recontextualizing it into humorous comic strips.  take a look!
reconverted:
	carlos whatever that means!  the matter is reconverted upon arrival at our destination.
recording:
	agnes  finally, i found this nice man at a little recording studio over in brantley.  he said he wouldn't mind asking around on the internet for me.
recounted:
	551551;  a tale is recounted for posterity
recounting:
	jimmy unlike the animals, in order to communicate we must convert ideas down into inefficient sets of words.  this is such a lost of nuance that it's like recounting an opera in morse code.  to a cocker spaniel, human speech is like beeping in german.
recovering:
	victor but then the fist takes some supplements or something and it starts squeezing harder and harder and you realize that the situation is getting worse not better and at this rate it looks like it really might keep getting worse without ever recovering, i mean it passes that point
recovery:
	578578;  recovery is not rapid
recreated:
	terry faithfully-recreated goals.  realistic dreams.  comes with a full set of aspirations, that, as the puppeteer, you can fulfill or crush at your discretion.  "i wanted to be an ice-cream flavor tester!"  "not even a superstar!  just a solid 9-to-5 at dreyer's that pays the bills."
recrimination:
	black  i know recrimination doesn't solve matters, but i'm finding it very hard not to blame you for everything. uprooting whole cultures, transporting them across the globe, dehumanizing an entire race.
recruit:
	wolf all you'll have to do for maximum reward is recruit four more wolves under you-
rect:
	rect-ified?
recuperative:
	top hat  but the whole point of detournement, from a strict situationist perspective, is to divert bourgeois cultural elements to new subversive roles! the spectacle's great recuperative powers are hijacked to instead serve as a vehicle for revolutionary communique!
recursiveness:
	"3. our simple pattern for the box (left) includes hinged walls held in shape with cotter pins. this way, should you fail to complete construction of the box itself, you may simply remove the pins and place the loose pieces within the general shape of the half-formed box. this recursiveness cuts down on waste."
recycle:
	 recycle at 
recycled:
	 then you'll love the soup--it's recycled too! (by my kidneys)
recycling:
	desmond my first project will be refurb'ing the pond to feature waterproof, motion-activated bread-crumb dispensers.  these will work in concert with a mandatory neighborhood old-muffin recycling program.
reddit:
	violet i dunno, probably just hang out looking at funny pictures or reddit, or maybe watch something on netflix?
redefine:
	 you can't just redefine math to support your argument
redemption:
	eugene visiting otto in the hospital what happened?  your ridiculous money-redemption scheme was going so well!
rediscovered:
	 the things i have seen, bartleby!  a man named goat see has rediscovered leonardo's 'tunnel of knowledge' festival trick!
redistribution:
	717717; the equitable redistribution of rigatoni
reeeeally:
	 also they have installed moles at the x-ray machines who foil imperialism by working reeeeally slowly
reeking:
	timmy interrupting of corroding matter left reeking of utter sadness.  i know!  they come by every day!  we applaud, toss them a coin or two and go about our business!  geez!
reeks:
	desperation reeks from these walls.  this morning, you ate great handfuls of pretzels through thick veils of tears.  you will do the same tomorrow.
reel:
	 reel 'em in 
reenactors:
	todd cold war reenactors?  dressing up in old soviet uniforms, photographic documents with tiny cameras...using phrases like "checkpoint charlie" in bed
referrals:
	 jordan damascus gets most of his business from the phone book.  not really from referrals.
referred:
	moppet  i'm referred to as 'that wailing she-demon' or 'poopy mcpoop-maker' or 'regretty mistakovich'.  didn't you like me?
refers:
	a minister you think people generally live up to their given names?  do they become some certain type of person because of the word that everybody refers to them by?
refill:
	 the man on the far left is is declining a refill from a jeweled vial of tears collected from the woman second from the right
refinery:
	 the person on the oil rig wasn't happy. the people in the plastic refinery or whatever weren't happy. the guy driving the truck and the kid stocking the store shelves were both unhappy.
refining:
	alejandro oh?  you've also cut out plastics?  every year in this country, plastic manufacturing uses three times as much petroleum as vehicle-fuel refining.
refinishing:
	- dear mrs. crabtree, i'm sorry for spilling ink on your new desk. i sold a kidney to pay for the refinishing, because hey, i've got two, right?
reflective:
	  teach them well, and let them lead the way along the path we have clearly outlined for them with $18.99 reflective tape.
reflects:
	phil you invented a dream-me out of your personal, and thus by definition limited, understanding of who i am.  anything that shadow-puppet did in the bony cavern of your imagination reflects not on me, but upon your perception of me.
reflex:
	340340; harold's unfortunate reflex
refreshed:
	 feel refreshed at 
refrigerators:
	coal in the home. the family in question had attached turbine-boilers to every device in the home toasters, refrigerators, can-openers &c. what reports fail to mention is that the lady of the house works in a factory where the small boilers are manufactured. she acquires them at a steep discount. this is clearly out of range for the average family.
refugees:
	mexican alien #1 we are alone. refugees on this planet!
refurb:
	desmond my first project will be refurb'ing the pond to feature waterproof, motion-activated bread-crumb dispensers.  these will work in concert with a mandatory neighborhood old-muffin recycling program.
refuses:
	 i never knew that weddings were a cargo cult, where if you get something wrong with the napkins then god refuses to sanctify the union.
refute:
	 refute 
regaining:
	talosian ...it was thought the fiction of a court-martial would prevent you from too soon regaining control of your vessel.
regains:
	the elephant regains his composure and rides away on his velocipede. the girl keeps reading her book.
regatta:
	of a sailboat "1. model sailboat can be used to repel aphids from plants. aphids have a jungian aversion to open water, and the presence of the boat implies a nearby regatta."
regime:
	630630; a new regime
regional:
	people love regional food, she said!
register:
	man 1 i have a complaint to register regarding municipal affairs
registered:
	 he is, however, properly registered
registers:
	elmer used to be, cashiers had to count change backwards.  start with the price of the item, then add coins and bills as necessary to add up to the amount you'd given them.  it's a more accurate method!  now, their registers tell them how much change to give out.  you have to hope your cashier can correctly assemble unusual amounts at a moment's notice.  because there's no deduction involved, the process becomes rote and prone to error!
regretty:
	moppet  i'm referred to as 'that wailing she-demon' or 'poopy mcpoop-maker' or 'regretty mistakovich'.  didn't you like me?
regulation:
	- i'm not sure if jumping knights with your emperor is allowed in regulation play.
regulatory:
	candidate i will award lucrative contracts to every crony i can get on the phone. i will make lawyers from every regulatory agency work harder than they ever have in their lives.
regurgitating:
	 do you even care about my interests? (regurgitating earthworms; eating beetles; screaming at the top of my lungs for no reason whatsoever)
rehab:
	maurice we're his sponsors.  it's the least we can do.  it's all part of rehab.
rehearsing:
	 don't worry, they are just rehearsing a play
reindeer:
	rudolph's a non-canon reindeer!
reinforce:
	father what happened to "i refuse to reinforce demeaning stereotypes?"
reins:
	back on shore, a man in riding clothes stands over the body, holding the reins of his horse in one hand. another man stands a short distance away.
relabeling:
	tea-pouring  they're...relabeling hot dogs as mild dogs, now that the bar has been reset.
relatable:
	researcher which of these adjectives would you use to describe the queen? likeable, cool, enjoyable, funny, exciting, impressive, relatable?
relation:
	a large, bearded man is approached by a small, armored elephant carrying a howdah with four passengers.  perched on the elephant's trunk is a small woman (about two heads tall in relation to the man), proportionate to the men in the howdah.
relationshaaaooww:
	wilbur (aloud)  when you shoot me full of arrows, i feel like we aren't contributing equally to the health of this relationshaaaooww
relationship:
	andrew you said it - she acts affectionate and friendly, and i'm satisfied with that.  however, her cashew-sized cat brain may be conceptualizing the situation as immaterial, since our existing relationship is perfectly serviceable.  functionally, she loves me!
relatives:
	 cell phone lines were jammed.  everyone was so busy fielding concerned calls from out-of-state relatives that they didn't notice the giant meteor oh noooooooo
relayed:
	maurice [holding a large eel] have you ever felt that way but then relayed that your good friend knows way more about having fun than you do so you should just trust him for once?
released:
	s.a.m.i.r. has apparently released himself from jail by cutting through the bars with his built-in circular saw and bending them out of the way.
relentless:
	bugle earth's gravity relentless.  crushing force affects all life, systems on planet.
relevant:
	 i actually have several interesting things to say on the subject but a dude eating leaves just seems more relevant
reliance:
	you gotta teach self-reliance!  a few bumps and bruises are good for a kid!
reliant:
	lawyer would you be interested in participating in a class action? to punish the zipper company for is cavalier pursuit of never-ending profits at the expense of ordinary, hardworking, zipper-reliant citizens like yourself?
relics:
	 ooh, what a scary little pirate! / do you want to see some real pirate relics?
relief:
	todd  here is my plan.  a store where i sell allergy-relief products for dogs.
relieve:
	 i worked on the television campaign for the movie 'robots' and at one point we used the james brown song 'dr. detroit' and there is a line that goes, 'get up offa that thang, dance 'til you feel better, get up offa that thang, tryn'ta relieve that pressure' and i swear it was so infectious i had to keep standing up and dancing feverishly before i could go on
relish:
	johnson who says it's preferable to be awake?  pardon me if i relish my nightly visits to a lyrical realm of magic beauty.  why is that something i have to apologize for?  so i don't like leaving that all behind.  who would?
reliving:
	woman but you keep reliving the memory...
relying:
	mycroft  but at its core, society is made of tribes.  it's our neighbors who we'll be relying on when the corporations come crashing down!
remainder:
	- you there! have you seen my son go by? he's infected by a terrible virus that will kill one-third of the earth's population, making five-eights of those remaining lactose intolerant while granting amazing super-powers to a quarter of the remainder!
remake:
	 remake a buck 
remedies:
	 sometimes mom's old remedies suck
remedy:
	 it's a folk remedy!
remembered:
	 i can't wait to hear what you half-remembered the confusing details of next.
remind:
	hobart mr. grambly's sort of a force of nature around here.  nobody knows what he does with the meat.  but he's been carting it off for years.   some folks say he humps it.  other folks say he's feeding it to a monster that he then humps.  personally, i think he buys it to remind himself of his own crippling mortality.  we all need our reminders.
reminded:
	violet i can't go with you to the thing.  facebook just reminded me that saturday is haley's birthday party.
reminders:
	hobart mr. grambly's sort of a force of nature around here.  nobody knows what he does with the meat.  but he's been carting it off for years.   some folks say he humps it.  other folks say he's feeding it to a monster that he then humps.  personally, i think he buys it to remind himself of his own crippling mortality.  we all need our reminders.
reminisce:
	 reminisce 
remnants:
	jack 'aged cheddar.'  so apparently there's crates of cheddar sitting around somewhere, just aging.  what if society ends and no new cheddar is crated away to age?  how would we remnants of humanity decide when to eat what limited supply remains?
renders:
	sig i have globular thigh disorder!  it's a very rare condition that renders my thighs the exact shape of watermelons!  it's miserable to live with!
renounce:
	monsarto no no please i renounce my idealism
renounced:
	i have renounced my slave name.
rented:
	rolf if you see movement, call it in.  if you see a squirrel, call it in.  if you see two weird-looking leaves in a row, call it in.  if you see adorable deer frolicking lustily in a meadow, it is probably enemy agents in rented costumes trying to lower your guard.  shoot them and then call it in.
repackaged:
	woman 1 so he says, "paintbrushes are what? just animal hair, repackaged!"
repairing:
	s.a.m.i.r., ever helpful, fires up his welding gear (including a mask) and sets about repairing the bars.  he does remain outside the cell, though.
reparations:
	 make reparations 
repeatable:
	coal-powered vehicles. it also turns out that the man of the house is an auto mechanic specializing in absurd "pimptastic" modifications! this is hardly repeatable.
replaces:
	he replaces his monocle with a shaded lens.
replacing:
	an older man appears in the mirror, replacing the woman's reflection
replica:
	bearded  it's a fully functioning scale replica of the central train depot in leipzig, germany!
repopulate:
	- last two survivors get to repopulate the planet! that's the rule, i didn't make it up.
reporters:
	simon hey, have any reporters shown up lately?  tv trucks?  camera vans?  photojournalists who may also be arachnid-based superheroes?  anything like that?
reporting:
	walt we're still reporting on the tragic case of forty miners trapped in a cave-in.  with us live is mine foreman eustace prowlybucket.
represent:
	husband who decided which random measurements would represent this newborn to the world?  "we've birthed an offspring.  the circumference of its head is 35 centimeters."
representational:
	eugene bank accounts are just numbers in a computer.  they're a representational fiction, not discrete objects.  it's all imaginary.
reprocess:
	offpanel voice  ...have developed a way to reprocess cow methane into jet fuel.
reptiles:
	two gaxians, sapient reptiles (human bodies with long necks and lizard heads), are outside a boarded-up building.  to the left is a sign with a banner attached.  the male gaxian sits dejectedly in a chair.
republic:
	walt breaking news.  tragedy strikes eastern europe as a trainload of irradiated hamsters derails in the former soviet republic of georgia.
republilcans:
	bernice republilcans.
repudiates:
	the man repudiates the duck's writing.
reputation:
	722722; the reputation of the mexican
requesting:
	- what do you have to say for yourself? besides requesting an autograph?
requirements:
	- i think you would be a good fit here. / do you have salary requirements?
requisite:
	girl it's an absolute requisite.
res:
	 pity you can't see the crazed look in his eyes in the lo-res web version
resale:
	resale value. of what? the house? the cars? pets? no
rescue:
	culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.
resealable:
	voicemail to report a lost or stolen card, twist the receiver in opposite directions with both hands.  have a resealable glass container nearby to catch the liquid that emerges from the earpiece.  in a dark, quiet room, press your face against the mouth of the container and tell the liquid exactly what happened to your card.  vivid memories are best.  the good times your card enabled you to have.  tell it all this, and seal it.
researchers:
	a group of researchers examine a large egg
researches:
	martha  right.  nowadays everyone researches every purchase obsessively online.
resembled:
	phil no, i was safe and sound in my own bed.  a synaptic construct that resembled me may have been in your dream last night.
resembling:
	another, much younger man, with a top hat and a monocle over his right eye, looks at a machine resembling a skateboard at the bottom of the panel.
resent:
	eleanor i was minding my own business in my own house!  i resent having to defend myself against this pitch!
resentful:
	marvin my resentful attitude toward fatherhood will yield spiteful and maladjusted children. on my deathbed, i will plead with them for reconciliation. to no avail.
reset:
	tea-pouring  they're...relabeling hot dogs as mild dogs, now that the bar has been reset.
residence:
	 go close to the eanna temple, the residence of ishtar, such as no later king or man equaled!  go up the wall of uruk and walk around, examine its foundation, inspect its brickwork thoroughly.  go 0.8 miles on broadview terrace, then bear slight right turn and turn onto california avenue, for your destination will be on the right.
residents:
	desmond i'd also like everyone to start wearing feathers - to make new residents feel welcome as the area inevitably gentrifies.  it's time to add some biodiversity to our little subdivision!
resides:
	wendy exactly.  is it odd or unlikely that we happened to land on a planet where there also resides a gaxian?  it is not odd.  it is not unlikely.
resignation:
	employer i'm sorry that it's come to this, but frankly, you've left me no choice. there are really only two options for you you can offer your resignation, effective immediately -- or you will be terminated with cause. 
resistance:
	 resistance is 
resistant:
	inventor friction-recapturing inner flywheel. water-resistant to 18 meters. sixty-seven individual servomotors. bluetooth built into the heel.
resolutions:
	dr. monroe marcus!  new year's resolutions!  spit them out, lad!
resolved:
	- i'd resolved to be more socially responsible with my billions, but it just hasn't happened.
resonant:
	doctor yes...yes, that's a nice piece. that sounds tender. resonant, yet squishy.
resonates:
	 dare you blow the mortality tuba?  it plays a note which resonates across the realms of life and death!
resource:
	anton all ants are actually humans from the future.  resource scarcity will not be kind to our evolution.
resourceful:
	003003;  a scotsman proves resourceful
respected:
	stan an antelope-headed man bearing a large sack on his back, and wearing a dress kind villager!  is this the fabled town of inclusia?  where all are welcomed and respected, no matter what?
responded:
	 "this is a serious issue!" she said, to which he responded, gravely and with full eye contact, "yes. very serious."
responds:
	two aliens with long spiky feathers crowning their bird-style feathered heads address a middle-aged woman with her hair pulled back severely, dressed in a long-sleeved dark dress with an apron.  she is holding a round serving tray in her right hand, angled against her body, and has her left arm akimbo. she responds to them in a matter-of-fact yet kindly manner.
restful:
	hector  oh yeah.  plenty dark.  nice and restful.
restless:
	 he has wandered the globe, a restless spirit, haunted by his act, his betrayal of his one true love.  he is about to spend the rest of eternity learning everything there is to know about the three-hole punch.
restocking:
	cashier well, without a receipt the best i can give you is store credit, minus a restocking fee. 
restore:
	donny last year, your brother sacrificed himself to save the planet. / thank god he was able to destroy the alien robots controlling our lending markets and restore the world to prosperity!
restored:
	culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.
restraint:
	lois and isn't it good to exercise a healthy discipline of delayed gratification?  if in doubt, save it?  after all, you never know when you'll need that cheddar!  like you said - the world ends, and now you're king!  won't you be glad you showed restraint?
restrict:
	 supposedly the cucumber is the only food that contains every necessary nutrient, albeit in trace amounts for some. so if you're going to restrict yourself to a single food, twenty pounds of cucumbers is a reasonably smart choice.
restroom:
	your restroom is a tomb.
rests:
	a woman comforts the man as he rests his head in his hands mournfully.
resulting:
	- whoa, whoa, hold your horses there, buddy.  our kids? / like, offspring resulting from some hypothetical union of you and me?  i don't know what sort of abnormal philandering you're hinting at, but leave me and my chromosomes out of your sick plans, okay?
retaliation:
	man 2 they're launching missiles at the sun in angry retaliation.
retractable:
	joanne ?and over here i'll be knocking through the wall to open the kitchen into the living room.  it'll be fully open, but with a retractable bar that descends from the ceiling for parties, or just for breakfast.
retro:
	 my shirt is in russian, which is ironic because the ideal consumer of this shirt does not speak russian. he or she is also probably too young to remember the soviet union, thus neo-soviet design is "retro." in addition, the shirt is ironic because it asks "where is my elephant?" although the elephant is clearly right there in the center.
retrospect:
	 in retrospect it was also probably a bad idea to serve, instead of ice water, flesh-dissolving acid that looked and tasted exactly like ice water
returning:
	returning to reality, he replies to the wo
reunite:
	without my josie, my life is without purpose.  so here i lie, waiting for the darkness to reunite me with her.  to the world, i'm dead already.
reusable:
	leonard  reusable toilet paper.
rev:
	rev. king his mama wanted to call him quay'shawn.  i said, woman!
reve:
	your title is "the { chrono, neuro, aero, cosmo, reve, necro, cyber, astro, psycho, steam, meta, black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, war} s."
revered:
	westmoreland  wicked.  carter, bust out the gatling guns.  i want to be revered as a god by teatime.
revert:
	 revert 
reviews:
	 the yelp reviews for this place are all over the map.
revisit:
	 revisit 
revolution:
	kris oh, yes. that's what they used to call me. before the proletariat revolution. before elvengrad. before the camps.
revolve:
	- most of my complaints revolve around the security system no longer being of the "old man napping in chair" model.
rewards:
	 enthusiastic ideas are like crappy rewards points. you earn them fair and square, but then they expire faster than you think.
reypuh:
	woman 2 antooda reypuh blik fohrwitchi stan
rgen:
	j‹rgen (anesthetizing a patient) can we please talk about this another time
ribbons:
	cynthia my dress has pressed itself firmly into the voids in the wicker seat-backs.  my stockings have wound themselves about the chair-legs.  even the ribbons in my shoes have drilled deep into the earth at my feet.  i don't imagine i'll be leaving for a while, if ever.  you may wish to come back in twenty years to sit in my shade.  bring a picnic.
ribs:
	 well, something shifted and now i have a desperate urge to poop out all my ribs
richer:
	- those invisible death-ships are trigger-happy, man. i want those ambassadors wined and dined and bought whatever they want. / the rich can get rich and stay rich and get even richer so long as they stay a step ahead of the expensive tastes of the monsters who hold the planet's survival in their volatile claws!
riches:
	005005;  riches are pondered
richness:
	britney oh, dorothy, i just love your cushions!  they're so comfortable, after a long, hard day of idle richness.
riddled:
	the woman stands in front of a display easel riddled with shuriken
ridge:
	jane your shoulder was almost even with the ridge by the top of the mirror.  so that would have made you this tall, the last time i saw you.  or did i see you at jim's wedding?  i ducked out early - court appointment - but i may have seen you.  you would have been seated and i would have only seen the back of your head, if anything.  so it would have been hard to estimate your height from that.
ridges:
	- i think that's a ship, but ships are normally salted with cheddary ridges!
ridin:
	left bifton's gonna be ridin' the upside-down turnip truck all the way to tuscaloosa, that's for sure.
rifles:
	and her { wacky pet, welding gear, closet full of assault rifles, reference book, cleavage, facility with magic, condescending tone, discomfort in formal wear, propensity for being captured,
rig:
	 the person on the oil rig wasn't happy. the people in the plastic refinery or whatever weren't happy. the guy driving the truck and the kid stocking the store shelves were both unhappy.
rigatoni:
	717717; the equitable redistribution of rigatoni
rights:
	clive  how are you getting so many signatures for lobster rights?
rigid:
	if the sparse hair on each digit stiffened and elongated into whiskers, and those rigid tendons on my feet became long, whipping tails, possessed of an independent dark energy?
riiiiight:
	algernon  aw-riiiiight!
riled:
	 get riled 
rim:
	in a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, vr-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | america, japan, soviet russia, victorian britain, medieval europe, aztec empire, atlantis, terraformed mars, antarctica, one-way spaceflight, outer rim world, set from road warrior,
ringing:
	in undead ears is ringing'
riot:
	riot police are blocking the alleys.  trying to shepherd us back into the central square #downtownriots
rioting:
	the city is in flames.  people are leaping from windows and rioting in the streets.  fire brigades try desperately to control the flames, and in the middle of it all, towering over the burning buildings and tiny people, stands the enormous, stovepipe-hatted figure of abraham lincoln.
ripped:
	hap it looks like the flesh of my chest is ripped back and inside my body there is a tiny dinosaur working a series of levers to control me  down one arm there's an army of manatees mounting to stage a coup and take control of the me-throne  down the other arm is the rival army of dinosaurs but they are actually being driven by butterflies in hive-mind mode  climbing up my back there's like a silhouette of myself but it's as if i'm climbing the mountain of me to get my soul back from the dinosaur in my ribcage  and i'm being chased by this fast-growing fungus that is turning my body to mushrooms as it creeps up from my crack
rising:
	craig  flood's rising!  we gotta go!
risked:
	032032;  a coup is risked
risks:
	mikey that is so childish and uninteresting!  just following a formula!  i'm talking about making art.  taking risks.  shocking the senses with something complex and uncomfortable.
ritual:
	student we sing songs about how mexicans are lazy, kids go to mexicans-are-lazy camp, there's all this ritual chanting...  but now is a tough time.  recently the church splity into factions - my group thinks zacatecanos are the laziest, but some crazy nutjobs think it's oaxacans. what a bunch of idiots!
riva:
	glen his posts there inform me about a new username "krei-me-a-riva," which has a livejournal - and that has a link to a newish tumblr.
rivets:
	projects are stackable. it's not that i'm starting something new before finishing something old - i'm nesting the new project inside the old. if it has screws, they shall be turned. if it has bolts, they shall be loosened. if it has rivets, they may get along for a while without being pried open, but that probably won't last.
roadkill:
	628628; the quantum roadkill
roadway:
	but i wouldn't send a two-bit boulder-licker into a carriage-filled roadway wearing this cheapjack chop-job!  where is your pride, sir!
roam:
	foster  but sparky's still got a life to live.  take her away from this blasted place, will you?  find her some pasture to roam...
roasted:
	and he's just waiting for children to pet his puppy butt so he can burn them alive and eat their roasted skin!
roasting:
	later, barnes is spreading sauce over a horse-sized chunk of meat, roasting on a spit.
robbers:
	bart fine, new idea - we dress like bank robbers and the minister is the flustered bank manager.  the attendees all have to like on the floor and be very quiet no heroes
robe:
	a woman carrying a bundle walks down a country lane with a bearded old man in a robe.
robes:
	a japanese father sits before a quartet of sumo wrestlers.  a son, dressed in traditional japanese robes, approaches.
robin:
	passersby join fray, one lady with bird on hat, or robin hood
rocked:
	julian so i said, screw that noise.   we rocked some eye contact.  i went for it.
rocketships:
	'if he spent as much time studying as he does drawing rocketships in class, he will go far.
rockwell:
	top hat  you must be thinking of norman rockwell, probably because you're a dumbass.
rode:
	dawn too late!  old news!  health care is the biggest problem facing our society since dukakis rode a tank!  grave pronouncements are hitting the media at rates unseen since the cuban missile crisis!
roger:
	231231;  roger attempts a scheme
rolex:
	- that's a nice rolex. be a shame if anything were to happen to it.
rolled:
	effie (taking a bath) riddle me this how is it that a hotel with gourmet coffee and 400-thread-count sheets can't provide a bar of soap that doesn't make you feel like you've rolled around in a basket of fleas for an hour?  isn't humanity past that point in soap technology?
roller:
	gregg walking away with a can of paint and a roller there.  much better!
rollin:
	woman we're rockin' it we're rollin' it we're dryin' it denyin' it ...the right to be wet anymore
rolls:
	houses in the city. a horse-drawn carriage rolls past.
roman:
	 technically the roman saturnalia and the pagan solstice festival were separate and both co-opted by christianity centuries apart but whatever, historical accuracy
rome:
	 a ton of sunk costs have gone into this food. you can't just toss it! that's sociopathic. that's nero, fiddling while rome burns. the food version.
ron:
	ron do you think everyone has the same number of hair follicles?  on the face of it, you'd think of course not.  some people are way hairier than others.  but are they?  or is their hair just thicker and coarser?  even bald people have hair follicles, it's just that fewer of them are active.  i mean, why wouldn't we all have the same number of follicles?  we have the same number of fingers.  i know, i know - some people don't have the same number of fingers.  but that's abnormal.  but - jeez, maybe there's a high rate of abnormality with hair, too.   with so many follicles, the chances of minor mutation during development are very high.  meaning, even if there were some theoretical "ideal" number of follicles, chances are slim that anybody would match that number.  so if there were an ideal number, would we even know?
rookie:
	jimbo well, we're in a bit of a bind.  some yahoo threw in a rookie and how our columns don't quite balance. ...yeah, it was 31.  i didn't want to say anything, he's still prime and all.  but it's a bit of a fiasco.
roommate:
	- my roommate is so rude. there's always these weird noises coming from his room.
roots:
	clarence christmas these days is only sacred to accountants tabulating retail sales figures.  can't we set aside our selfish urges just for one day, and concentrate on the true, spiritually meaningful roots of the holiday season?
rosa:
	 then, with a mighty caw, the beast whirled and dumped a gallon of chalky white right on rosa's bonnet
rosh:
	i mean, happy jewish new year!  it's rosh hashanah.
roshambo:
	 has anyone ever done a roshambo/rashomon crossover?  ?i won? ?no, *i* won?
rosy:
	chester  no rosy little cheeks were slashed by razor-laden apples.
rotate:
	carlos on mexico, creatures are segregated by horn quality into inviolable casts that annually rotate civic duties,  right now twosies are the lawyers, threesies the bakers, and ninesies like us are the astronauts.
rote:
	elmer used to be, cashiers had to count change backwards.  start with the price of the item, then add coins and bills as necessary to add up to the amount you'd given them.  it's a more accurate method!  now, their registers tell them how much change to give out.  you have to hope your cashier can correctly assemble unusual amounts at a moment's notice.  because there's no deduction involved, the process becomes rote and prone to error!
rotting:
	it's like...hmm.  vinegar, certainly.  old chicken rotting in the trash.
roughhouse:
	what if they think i'm weird? or start throwing things or want to "roughhouse"?
roughhousing:
	the boys are roughhousing so!  someone's going to get hurt!
roundabout:
	175175; a roundabout method of product introduction
rounded:
	dennis what if i'm okay with not being the world's greatest at something?  what if i'm content with being an easygoing, well-rounded individual whose pursuits are more about personal enjoyment than internet competitiveness?
rowboat:
	sidney sits on an overturned rowboat.  a large seabird stands before him.
royalties:
	- this guy actually bought a 37-cent stamp to tell me how much he hated my book. the library will buy a new copy, and i'll get the royalties.
rrahhhnn:
	scotty you shoulda seen it.  i never saw a fish charge like that before.  and loud, too - all "grouueeahhh!" and "ffrooorrhaa!" and "rrahhhnn!"
rrghhh:
	hank rrrgh.   rrghhh
rrrgghhh:
	pat  rrrgghhh!  give me a shove!
rrrgh:
	hank rrrgh.   rrghhh
rrring:
	 boo-rrring
rrrr:
	- rrrr
rrrraaaaarrrgh:
	garfield i hate mondays / goku then we must destroy them rrrraaaaarrrgh
rrrrgghhh:
	hank rrrrgghhh
rrrrr:
	mumpy  rrrrr
rrrrrgghh:
	gax rrrrrgghh
rrrrrrr:
	dog rrrrrrr
rss:
	- i just saw muffin's blog on my rss reader.
rubbed:
	leslie another depression day.  god, i hate getting it rubbed in my face that people are so gullible.  
rubber:
	the hollow top half of a ball "3. instead of discarding the half-balls left over from a game of slice-the-ball-in-the-garden, use them to cap off leaky sprinklers or plug gopher holes. the rubber balls are biodegradable, given a long enough timeline."
rubbery:
	mr. kabob i'm a thirteen-dollar, rubbery-tasting kabob representing the captive-audience retail dining industry!
rubble:
	  sixteen hours later the whole building is just rubble
rubs:
	morty  absolutely.  but come christmas morning, what do we see but ebenezer scrooge himself dancing down the avenue, handing out candy and neck-rubs!  we can't even get the "lo" out of "hello" before he's torn up our debt right there in the street!
ruddagubbuk:
	woman reading in bed ruddagubbuk.
rudimentary:
	 'it exhibits a striking lack of comprehension of even the most rudimentary precepts of fire safety'
rudolf:
	- how about genghis khan swanson.  idi amin swanson.  james k. polk swanson.  rudolf diesel swanson.
rugrat:
	skip nothing worse, right?  cramped space, uncomfortable seats, and some little rugrat just screaming bloody murder like it's a washcloth being wrung out.   well, my invention is a special hood that fits securely around the baby's upper region to effectively muffle any disruptive noises that might disturb fellow passengers.
rugs:
	a squareish design is shown, divided into parts, that say "carpet," "wood," "c8, ny," and "621 b'way." parquet and inlaid floors, borders for rugs, baseboards, decks, crown molding, doors, anything wood feeds our weird fetish.
rum:
	tiger  soft.  heavily marbled.  slightly nutty with a hint of old rum.
rumors:
	paul i'm tired of network news scare tactics.   i don't want spin or rumors or corporate b. s.  can you just tell me in plain terms?   what.  should.  i.  eat.
rump:
	 really?  rump roast didn't go on the first day?
rundown:
	i know you're new, so ask one of the guys to give you a rundown on our optimizating procedure.
runner:
	phil i'm telling you.  it's better than winning an ice cream nobel prize.  better than a runner's high brought on by hugging your mom.  it's better than everything.
runway:
	a single-runway airport sits outside a small town.  a few buildings are visible in the near distance.
rural:
	exterior a quaint rural abode.
ruse:
	 i'm incredibly curious to see how convoluted this santa mythos will get as they try to keep it plausible for ten more years.  will he eventually be cloned?  have sleeper cells across the world?  be revealed to be an alien?  who will tire of the ruse first??
rushing:
	phil don't get me wrong.  kissing a sweetheart, holding a baby, saving a dog from a rushing river...these are all nice ways to spend a lazy afternoon.
ruuuunnnnn:
	 run.  run for the ocean.  ruuuunnnnn
saaaaave:
	rob (leaning even closer)  saaaaave yourselllves
sabotaging:
	alf a facile comparison!  baseball is a competition, and we expect the pitcher to also be partially successful.  you have no such excuse.  your horn is a thing of brass.  it is not fighting you.  despite what you insist, it is not some animate demon spirit hell-bent on sabotaging your every effort.
sacking:
	131131;  clyde wishes sacking upon himself
sacrifices:
	091091;  sacrifices are made
saddam:
	rhonda there ain't no fat man in a big red suit.  i mean there's men, in malls around the world, but they ain't santa.  they're just doubles.  decoys.  like saddam.  agents.  puppets on a string.  on my string.
saddens:
	- sigh.  i knew that was coming.  and that saddens me.
sadist:
	which spurs him into conflict with { a megalomaniacal dictator, a government conspiracy, a profit-obsessed corporation, a sneering wizard, supernatural monsters, computer viruses made real, murderous robots, an army led by a sadist, forces that encourage conformity, a charismatic politician on the rise, humanity's selfish nature, his own insecurity vis-a-vis girls
safari:
	- hey, this must be the package jim sent me from his jungle safari!
safeway:
	mycroft (thought) aw, seriously?  it's like $2.85 at safeway.
saihkahnn:
	woman 2 ohhhohh saihkahnn euuucieee
sail:
	 sail away to 
sailing:
	 one week earlier 'now be careful!  don't go sailing too close to the rocks!' 'i promise!'
salamander:
	lara i grew my own wheat.  milled the flour with a stone dug up from my yard.  built the oven out of bricks i sculpted myself.  even evolved a chicken out of a salamander to get eggs.
salary:
	- i think you would be a good fit here. / do you have salary requirements?
salisbury:
	first  the place is supposed to be toity, so i go for the salisbury steak, figure why not.
sall:
	 the waiter pronounced it 'sall-mons'
salmons:
	i am sorry to say that we are also out of the salmons.
salmony:
	 don't make me put one of your salmony brethren on here to seal the deal
salon:
	daughter and then i ran into him at the hair salon of all places!
salvador:
	carlos our planet's name is mexico.  it means "fragrant flowering fruit" in our native tongue.  prior cultures have called it by other names.  guatemala.  honduras.  el salvador.  nicaragua.
salvation:
	550550;  salvation is summoned
samberg:
	larry they made a dance mix from my tugboat sounds!  then pretty girls with ukuleles did covers of the dance mix.  honey.  andy samberg played me on snl.  making boat noises.  they love me.  they want what i got.
sammich:
	lance arvid's twin, attacking a lion stop makin' eyes at my sammich
sampler:
	starting with the crab cake sampler.  then minestrone and broccoli cheese soup, a bowl and a cup respectively.
sanchez:
	- in 1882 while vacationing abroad, lord alistair bludd-smythe invented the "blumpkin", the "rusty steamer", the "dirty sanchez", the "steaming dragon", and the "grumpy munchkin", all which remain popular to this very day!
sanctify:
	 i never knew that weddings were a cargo cult, where if you get something wrong with the napkins then god refuses to sanctify the union.
sanctity:
	and may our souls commune as we explore the deep recesses of each other in the sanctity and anonymity of march moonlight!
sanctuary:
	this is zion, o simpleton.  thusly have i christened my sanctuary, my ascetic outpost, which secludes me from all worldly cares.
sane:
	higgins (out of frame) "sane," mr. malki !, sir.
sanji:
	193193;  sanji should seriously move on
sans:
	horace ?i look around the store and i realize why i'm kind of dizzy.  the sign on the counter is in comic sans.  on the window it's copperplate gothic.  and on the receipt it's monotype corsiva.  monotype corsiva!  so i said that's it!  i'll never again patronize any business that uses any typeface i can recognize!
sap:
	 also i will outlaw tree sap
sapient:
	two gaxians, sapient reptiles (human bodies with long necks and lizard heads), are outside a boarded-up building.  to the left is a sign with a banner attached.  the male gaxian sits dejectedly in a chair.
saplings:
	rope "2. ordinary parcel twine can be used to tie saplings to posts, rather than some kind of special gardening twine. it's not like you're going to use it for parcels. the only people who still tie parcels with twine are grandmothers, and that's only because the mail clerks feel bad yelling at them to knock it off."
sapphire:
	- ...finally he says, "your hair is like spun gold - and your eyes, like magnificent pools of sapphire sunlight." i didn't know what to say.
sarcast:
	friend was he being sarcast-
sari:
	a man in a turban sits, with some scales.   a woman in a sari and ornate earrings sits as well.
sash:
	 the color guard is nervously tittering.  the brass band has fainted from exertion.  the mayor is beginning to check his pocketwatch and fidget with his sash.
sass:
	old ant youngster! i won't brook your sass any longer! i don't know when respect went out of fashion in today's society! 
sassier:
	 she was sassier when she had a hat in the old version
saturn:
	clarence so, let us all give praise to saturn for another joyous winter solstice.
saturnalia:
	 technically the roman saturnalia and the pagan solstice festival were separate and both co-opted by christianity centuries apart but whatever, historical accuracy
saucy:
	samantha  i bet it's saucy letters from his first true love, before he met nana.
sausages:
	156156;  the cost of sausages is discussed
saver:
	jeff they want to position the plaque-vac as a time-saver.  so let's hear some copy about saving time.
savin:
	taken ten long years of scrimpin' and savin', but i finally own the old hovel free and clear.
sawwah:
	- sawwah.
saxophone:
	in fact, why don't you take your saxophone too, while you're at it!
sayin:
	  i want to be booty-deep in booty, you know wh'um sayin?
sayings:
	 note for international readers hot topic is a store found in suburban shopping malls.  they sell a bizarre combination of naughty novelties, goth gear like corsets and boots, and trendy logo shirts with 'clever' sayings and nintendo characters and the emblems of punk rock bands that were big a decade before the average customer was born.  it is the dictionary definition of over-the-counter counterculture.
scabies:
	guy gaxians are at especially high risk for scabies.
scabs:
	- gah! i've burst my scabs!
scalps:
	woman 2 bring his scalps over here.  i will do an incantation to banish the lices.
scamps:
	ma akcer there's the little scamps!  what have you kids been up to today?
scan:
	leopod don't forget cancer from the scan.
scandinavian:
	so for me, that would be scandinavian foods.  lots of fish, beets and apples.
scanner:
	greg let's say there's an expansion bay on my phone.  i can buy third-party modules specific to my needs.  maybe i want a digital tape measure and a level.  maybe i want a micrometer or a magnifier.  sometimes these are things i have to carry with me.  why can't they be on my phone, linked to the processor and the camera and the bluetooth chip?  i could turn my phone into a scanner or a nutritional scale or camera binoculars or fishing radar.  my examples aren't that broad-reaching, but if it's open-source then any tool a sufficiently nerdy subculture can't live without, they'll develop for themselves.  whaddya think?  good idea, huh?
scans:
	bernardo i just had one of those full-body cat scans.
scapegoat:
	 granted the foreign situation can't easily explain the waistline of everyone in the country, but it could be a pretty handy scapegoat
scar:
	ugh, it's so hot.  is it hot where you are?  i think i feel it more 'cuz of the vicodin.  did i tell you about my surgery?  oh, it was horrible.  my scar wouldn't stop oozing for like three weeks.
scarce:
	we'd better make ourselves scarce.
scarcely:
	sylvie you think i?m limited to moving envelopes?  huh?  i have seen horrors in the netherworld you can scarcely imagine!  wretched beasts rent limb from limb shrieking in pain while other beasts cackle!  oh, i can think of some horrible things, all right.  i can make life miserable!
scarcity:
	anton all ants are actually humans from the future.  resource scarcity will not be kind to our evolution.
scariest:
	he's the meanest goblin around!  the scariest monster in the whole world!
scars:
	chimp with guitar my soul is in a cage/oh the scars on my wrists tell a story/why did you run away from me/i didn't mean to hit you with my feces/oh yeah my feces
scathing:
	marcus mo-om!  he called me names on a messageboard!  he compared me to hitler!  i've spent all morning composing my scathing reply
scatter:
	sylvie next time i?m gonna scatter some paperclips see how you like it then
scenic:
	 visit scenic 
scent:
	- you're gone for god-knows how long... all i have is the sweet scent in your clothes! it's all i have!
schedules:
	bearded  every detail is authentic. the trains keep accurate schedules. the "staff" wear authentic uniforms. i even bought an actual uniform on ebay for the fabric!
scheduling:
	doctor and frankly, i'm not sure why you keep scheduling these exams.
schematic:
	erwin this appears to be a schematic for a plastic grocery bag.
schlub:
	a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild ocd, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert
scholarship:
	calvin this was my first book as a boy - filled with vivid descriptions of the workings of the world around us - this is the book that ignited my passion for learning!  for scholarship!  for a lifelong journey of self - and other - discovery!
schtick:
	andy okay, skip the cutesy alien schtick.  what's the message?  is it about the border fence?
sci:
	  specious argument #61 in favor of sci-fi being the best of all genres
scientific:
	ross decades of scientific research have gone into making this the strongest, most potent gullible ever.  previously available only to industry professionals, i'm pleased to offer it now in a new, ultra-concentrated form ten times more potent than any gullible you already have.
scissor:
	 stymied at the novelty-scissor emporium!
scooched:
	ariel he scooched his butt across the carpet in the shape of a crop circle.  he has taken disobedience to the level of a provocateur.
scooters:
	- wow, geez. world peace could be nice, or one of the segway scooters...
scored:
	460460;  free soup is scored
scorn:
	- how tragic! a victim of society's scorn, you cope with the stigma by drowning your sorrow's in further consumption!
scotsman:
	003003;  a scotsman proves resourceful
scoundrel:
	roderick  get back here, scoundrel!
scourge:
	311311; the scourge of northern europe
scout:
	- blech! find me a girl scout to cleanse my palate!
scouting:
	olaf oh, nothing!  just passing through!  looks like you guys made some, um, improvements since i was here scouting the area for conquest- i mean - um - dropping off that muffin basket.
scowl:
	- her majesty queen victoria once levelled a disapproving scowl of such ferocious intensity that none of the servant at buckingham palace were capable of shameful bodily functions for three whole days!
scrap:
	  that's just it!  i'm not!  i'm a complete outsider!  i can't give any interviews.  i can't write an op-ed column.  i can't even blog about it!  whenever these awful things happen, the public's massive appetite for tragedy sucks up every scrap of half-baked "expert opinion" it can find.  but i can never fit my name in anywhere!
scrape:
	older  have you ever been, say, eating a piece of chicken, and you feel your tooth scrape against the bone or you hear a tendon snapping a certain way...
scratches:
	a man scratches his head as a woman holds a little girl, who holds a toy dinosaur in one hand.
scrawled:
	 the legends come down to us in yellowed fur-trappers'  journals...in shaky rough-hewn script, scrawled by fading candlelight, a single penciled word 'awesome.'
screamed:
	- i cranked that #2 right into her cheek, screamed "this is for the boys at hill 42," and just twisted.
screams:
	two men listen silently as a baby screams ceaselessly offpanel.
screening:
	jamaal  hey, you wanna go to the university screening series?  this semester they're doing westerns.
screwdriver:
	three pictures on the side state "cut it", "hit it", and "stuff it", depicting a screwdriver of some sort, a hammer hitting a nail, and two hands grasping a piece of wood.
screwed:
	- 'scream car elephant young be much mangle.'  man, someone screwed up in the translation department.
scribs:
	 get your scribs on 
scrimpin:
	taken ten long years of scrimpin' and savin', but i finally own the old hovel free and clear.
scroll:
	judge finkins reads from a scroll.
scrubs:
	 butchers in scrubs 
scullery:
	bobby i bet my dumb parents never slaughtered a defenseless fishing village and took their women for scullery maids!
sculpted:
	lara i grew my own wheat.  milled the flour with a stone dug up from my yard.  built the oven out of bricks i sculpted myself.  even evolved a chicken out of a salamander to get eggs.
scum:
	goat fox, if you're reading herb's mail, you are scum, and i pray every day for your speedy, painful demise.
scumbag:
	se—or eugene hey! scumbag!  get a real job instead of preying on people!
scurrying:
	 if i no longer walked from place to place, but rather was ported about by the scurrying of forty tiny legs, pulling my stiff, upright body from place to place entirely in opposition to any will i might express?
scuse:
	jeff 'scuse me, i'm sort of new to the area.  can you direct me to the visitor's bureau?
scuze:
	abe 'scuze me, ma'am...i've fallen on hard times, and i'm wondering if you might be able to spare a couple bucks?
seabird:
	sidney sits on an overturned rowboat.  a large seabird stands before him.
sealant:
	floyd the problem wasn't bugs the problem was water getting into the suit. i just needed new fittings, is all. and sealant. and better hoses. i'm all set now!
seamlessly:
	farmer reggie well, guess what, nestle?  we use only genuine u.s. steel in our razor blades!  each blade is lovingly tied to an emerging springtime blossom so that the apple grows around the blade seamlessly!  some things are still done by hand!
seared:
	simon, who will...  free-range hen eggs delicately cracked into a porcelain bowl, the yolk and albumen whipped until smooth with a silver whisk, then seared on a steaming griddle until golden and fluffy.
seascape:
	jason stands with his back to donna; she and winifred are reading from a large paper.  a seascape is visible in the background.
seashore:
	seashore.  a woman is standing with her hands in her hair, possibly tying back a loose strand.  an old skeevy man pinches her on the bottom.
seasons:
	digger but, seasons change, circle of life, all that hippie junk. this shallow grave's not going to dig itself, so if you'll excuse me.
seating:
	(6) once needle has seating, use foot pedal to advance nectar at a rate of one pint per minute.
seawater:
	- hmm, seawater soup
secludes:
	this is zion, o simpleton.  thusly have i christened my sanctuary, my ascetic outpost, which secludes me from all worldly cares.
secrecy:
	this secrecy weighs heavy on my spirit!  must our love be confined to darkness forever?
secrete:
	gax i assure you, helen what you would term my pancreas does not secrete enough insulin to allow me to handle what you would term your cookies.  it's a condition.
sector:
	paul all right, i think i finally have a grasp on all the shenanigans in the financial sector?
sects:
	grandfather  i'm gonna say it  'spiritual but not religious' is a cop-out.  there are millions of wacky religious sects in the world.  no matter what you believe, i'm sure you could find someone who agrees with you.  
secularists:
	jesus i don't believe this. you secularists make me sick. seriously, if dying for the sins of the world doesn't get a guy on the nice list, i don't know what does.
secured:
	  soon  'hold still, both of you.  that cantaloupe is only secured on there with tape.'
securing:
	there is now a u-bolt securing both bikes to the meter, but they're not done yet.
seder:
	satan okay, well, make it quick, we're just sitting down to passover seder.
seduce:
	police ma'am, are you trying to seduce me?
seed:
	tad  but you have absolutely no engineering knowhow, seed capital, or business acumen whatsoever!
seedy:
	vince i don't know, it seems to me that any pun or permutation of the 'girls gone wild' concept would just be inherently in poor taste, especially at marketing directed at children.  also, it sends the tacit message that 'girls gone wild' is a normal and acceptable part of our culture - when in fact it's seedy trash that thrives on the most crass and debased elements of human nature.
seeeeee:
	 if i don't know where you were, then i don't know where i was.  and if i don't know where i was then, how can i know where i am now?  don't you see?  don't you seeeeee
seeking:
	amy  "although basic courtesy doesn't explain foreign genocide, highly-intuitive japanese kids let machines narrate old people's quiet recollections, seeking to ultimately vanquish wichita's xenophobic young zealots."
seester:
	 'she ees my seester' ha ha ha ha ha wait why aren't you laughing
seethe:
	 seethe 
segregated:
	carlos on mexico, creatures are segregated by horn quality into inviolable casts that annually rotate civic duties,  right now twosies are the lawyers, threesies the bakers, and ninesies like us are the astronauts.
segway:
	- wow, geez. world peace could be nice, or one of the segway scooters...
seized:
	326326;  the day is seized
selected:
	they had to be spliced.  and selected.  and bred.  and enchanted.
selfless:
	567567; o selfless saviors
sellers:
	glen i don't know if i should take business advice from a bookseller who doesn't carry any of the best-sellers on wealth-building.
selves:
	whitley  a lot of companies spend a lot of money to convince us that their product will finally make our messed-up selves normal.
semi:
	karl when you squeeze the tube, you generate energy.  this powers a chemical reaction that results in the formation of a semi-solid mass.  which plops out the end.  theoretically it's unlimited!  but because of the half-life of the chemical catalysts, each reaction requires twice as much energy as the one before.
seminar:
	 well regardless i have already processed your credit card for the seminar
seminars:
	clara and the dvds, and workshops, and seminars...as you know, it's much easier to manipulate the public than the stock market.
seminary:
	 this particular issue was covered in detail in seminary
semis:
	sister (thinks) at this rate i won't even make it to the semis!
semitikinesis:
	semitikinesis!
sender:
	man 1 no big deal, we thought. we returned it to sender. but then we got another. and another. and another. forty-eight, before we lost count.
senile:
	sidney  it's prob'ly something senile.  like toothpicks.  or clams.
seniors:
	norm  don't listen to him.  we're seniors.
sensed:
	sandra i've sensed it coming for years.  you know?  one day he simply ceased to be the same man i married.
senseless:
	amos that maniac jumped me in an alley, beat me senseless...tied me up and left me, passed out, bleeding!
senses:
	mikey that is so childish and uninteresting!  just following a formula!  i'm talking about making art.  taking risks.  shocking the senses with something complex and uncomfortable.
sensible:
	farmer reggie halloween has gotten too corporate!  big candy pushes its sugar-laden garbage as the only sensible choice to razor-bladed apples!  another example of big business using its marketing muscle to destroy the small entrepreneur!
sensitivity:
	leon gently caressing the horse buttercup you can't be a veterinarian if you love animals.  always seeing them in pain...and so often knowing there's nothing you can do... ...it would deaden your sensitivity to the preciousness of all the earth's living things.
sentimentality:
	wolf bipedal sentimentality! you'll soon be rid of it! you'll feel more alive, rod.  you'll hear the words of the moon.
sentiments:
	parker  i guess i just wish more people would share my sentiments.
sentry:
	sentry these voices sound like jerks.
sequences:
	you mean you're okay with intense sequences of violent action; liberal use of profanity, suggestive material, and drug references; and exactly one occurence of the "f" word?
serenade:
	- of course i'll marry you, darling! and the serenade was very romantic!
serrated:
	suddenly the cat's tail becomes a huge, articulated claw with a serrated edge.
server:
	simon, who will be your server today gentlemen.  are we ready to order?
serviceable:
	andrew you said it - she acts affectionate and friendly, and i'm satisfied with that.  however, her cashew-sized cat brain may be conceptualizing the situation as immaterial, since our existing relationship is perfectly serviceable.  functionally, she loves me!
servomotors:
	inventor friction-recapturing inner flywheel. water-resistant to 18 meters. sixty-seven individual servomotors. bluetooth built into the heel.
session:
	 marathon session 
setbacks:
	lou  fine.  couple of minor setbacks, no big deal.
seth:
	seth enters and sprays norville with a substance from a tank carried on his back.
settling:
	spencer so that's it, then?  you're planted here?  we see one play and you decide this is where you're settling down?
sevens:
	163163;  the dealer has no sevens
seventh:
	2. in the seventh grade, i invented a new eating utensil called the "clingting." i ate every meal with it for four and a half years.  it involved magnets.
seventies:
	sylvie what?  no, i lived in the seventies - i had this great bakelite phone -
severance:
	- i've had it. i really think i'm gonna quit. but i only get severance pay if i'm fired!
sewage:
	girl if everybody gets to turn their poetry into a lucrative career, hadn't we better hope someone decides to take up sewage treatment as a hobby?
sewing:
	percy and his mother.  mother is sewing.
sexy:
	- we were just discussing your super-sexy tattoo.
sez:
	scrib b ugh this room's just weird / room sez you / scrib b dibs on 
sgt:
	sgt. mitchell enters, hands brigham a slip of paper.
shackles:
	 not pictured wwi-era german officers in pointy helmets, fakirs, stripes-wearing prisoners complete with shackles and iron balls, larry flynt
shade:
	cynthia my dress has pressed itself firmly into the voids in the wicker seat-backs.  my stockings have wound themselves about the chair-legs.  even the ribbons in my shoes have drilled deep into the earth at my feet.  i don't imagine i'll be leaving for a while, if ever.  you may wish to come back in twenty years to sit in my shade.  bring a picnic.
shaded:
	he replaces his monocle with a shaded lens.
shadowy:
	the scene pans out showing the same gentleman, background, while in the foreground a shadowy figure looks at him with surprise and, possibly, alarm.
shag:
	ariel misbehavior has become his palette, our apartment his canvas, in a grand, grotesque installation - featuring us as predictable foils, our fury as much a deliberate part of the work as each precisely-browned fiber of shag.  more than a simple befoulment - this is a befoulment of order, a metaphorical poop-smear on the very notion of animal subjugation.
shaggy:
	gustave i see a slim figure, tight jeans, shaggy hair, sort of a pleasant boyishness - so i'm angling for a closer look -  and whoops!  it's a guy, wearing chuck taylors and listening to arcade fire.
shakin:
	westmoreland  hey man, what's shakin'.  what's the story with this valley?  this a good place to live, you think?
shameful:
	- her majesty queen victoria once levelled a disapproving scowl of such ferocious intensity that none of the servant at buckingham palace were capable of shameful bodily functions for three whole days!
shameless:
	eight-dollar hot dogs.  twenty-dollar cheese fries.  ten-buck gallons of soda made from four cents' worth of syrup.  shameless!
shamelessly:
	clara then, abandon all dignity by hawking your product shamelessly to gullible people.   presto!  profit.
shampooin:
	- is this where we drop off the medical testing waste? i got me some bunnies what couldn't take no more shampooin'.
shan:
	- i'm afraid i shan't, dear boy. i don't care much for books.
shana:
	shana tovah!
shane:
	203203; guest comic by v. shane
shank:
	first  i gotta say, your case would be a lot stronger if you hadn't gone on to shank that fat woman.
shapes:
	 just then the kinght came charging up, but he could only move in l-shapes so that dastardly bishop escaped
shapeshfit:
	helen i don't know, why can't you just shapeshfit your pancreas back into health?  morph those cells around until it works again?
shaping:
	bernie this is shaping up to be a legendary national election!
shared:
	jeremy  sure.  all our makeup.  i mean, you and i didn't meet until adulthood, but thanks to ubiquitous mass media, we had a shared childhood nonetheless.
sharing:
	general smitty are you running the taffy machine again and not sharing
sharks:
	132132;  sharks are swum with
sharper:
	barry  what?  then i'll tell them you voted to give the farmer a sharper ax!
sharting:
	- so, the only logical explanation is that the publisher is spying on me! watching my every move, sharting my every emotion... my privacy is gone! my civil liberties violated! i hope my hair looks okay.
shatter:
	for years it seemed like nobody could beat fifty percent--coolidge, pierce, eisenhower, reagan, you know all those tired old names--but obama's poised to shatter that record!
shatters:
	763763;  an infatuation shatters
shaven:
	it's the accused man, now clean-shaven and wearing a sign around his neck.  the sign bears one terrible word  beardless.
shaving:
	gentle hey, turns out it was just some shaving cream!
shavings:
	 optionally, they can be prepared drizzled with artisanal peppercorn shavings, or sprinkled with crushed crystalline minerals.  zagat take notice
shaw:
	woman aw, p'shaw, b! any dang fool can get on this train! it's just clothespins and finger-squeeze! old ladies got this noise covered!
shawn:
	rev. king his mama wanted to call him quay'shawn.  i said, woman!
sheared:
	the accused glares defiantly as his beard is sheared away.
shears:
	mrs. detwiler ah, you're not using that for the surgery.  oh, thank goodness! / jeb oh, no!  my dear woman, of course not! / no, for you i figured i'd stick with the ol' gardening shears.
sheaves:
	- you there! child! you're blocking my path. i have two sheaves of rabbits due at ihop in twenty minutes.
sheba:
	scrib b huh; malki's not even home / scrib a holy sheba will you look at this / wondermark character oh, great.  tourists.
shed:
	 the rock may shed light on questions raised by previous rocks j.k.r. may or may not have touched, and may also raise new questions to be addressed by future rocks
sheen:
	robot shaver.  children and animals are not allowed in most robot competitions.  hide your treachery with this shaver - removes hair and imparts a waxy, metallic sheen.  $2.00
sheezy:
	- fo' sheezy.
shelf:
	shop owner hey! you just pulled this off the shelf and now you're trying to return it!
shelter:
	laverne  you can't shelter kids forever!  they've got to learn to pick themselves up when they fall!
sheltered:
	newspaper text such are the benefits afforded us all by the unending march of progress, that each new dawn finds many a person safe, fed, clothed and sheltered. a citizen of our modern era rarely finds him- or herself in a deadly battle for survival, as was common for the first generations of mankind. thus do our bodies, evolved for and hardened by constant struggle, often find themselves idle; and without some constant whetting, thus swiftly begins the degenerative process of death.
shelves:
	 the person on the oil rig wasn't happy. the people in the plastic refinery or whatever weren't happy. the guy driving the truck and the kid stocking the store shelves were both unhappy.
sher:
	sher  if the difference between you has grown that great, you need to be frank about it.  for both your sakes.
shield:
	- eek! a man! shield your eyes!
shielded:
	don't look at me like that!  you gonna trigger a thing insideways that's been doing just fine shielded by the gut layer!
shielding:
	s.a.m.i.r. holds the open umbrella over the man's head, shielding them both from the rain.  the man looks surprised.
shields:
	all panels are letterboxed, as if on a movie or tv screen. a man shields his face.
shift:
	dale  you the new guy?  i'm dale, shift leader.
shifted:
	 well, something shifted and now i have a desperate urge to poop out all my ribs
shifts:
	view shifts to include an old man in a chair
shin:
	can he do it?  can he top the performance of china's xiao fei shin at last year's international championships?
shines:
	second woman yes, it shines brightly, even through the many layers of your ridiculous coat. 
shipping:
	- plus $8.95 shipping and handling.
shipyards:
	 he had been to a machine that predicted his death.  receiving 'scale,' he kept himself trim and avoided shipyards and truckstops.  and then, when maurice entered the room with his large eel, his blood froze.
shirked:
	128128;  duty is shirked
shirtless:
	two well-dressed men sit on chairs in an open, room-sized human mouth. a third, shirtless man stands beside the first man.
shiv:
	 the backbone of marriage is about to get a shiv shoved through it
shlikkk:
	<<shlikkk>>
shlink:
	<<shlink>>
shocker:
	 shocker! i was able to unleash my liquid ingredient in the lavatory and no one stopped me
shockingly:
	ken yes, well, clearly something has gone shockingly awry
shocks:
	 shocks 
shoddy:
	instructor  terrible.  terrible in every way. look at this shoddy work.
shoelace:
	rex let's knock again - you pretend to be a shoelace wholesaler while i try to sneak a peek inside
shoobidy:
	- shoobidy bap bap...
shooed:
	  she shooed them away all her life.  'not yet,' she'd say.  'not quite yet.'
shook:
	bob  in caveman days, you think they just shook babies all the time?
shopkeeper:
	shopkeeper man, i've been selling clean out of deodorant, hand lotion, and perfume! / i swear, it's like people been throwing it away.
shoppe:
	abelard and johnson talk in the doorway of a fruit shoppe.
shortcomings:
	stumpy i was gonna overlook the proposal's shortcomings and marry you anyway.
shortcuts:
	414414;  there may be shortcuts to success
shortening:
	woman it's not nourishing you! all that extra spaghetti is probably shortening your lifespan!
shorthand:
	dora last semester i had a student devise an elaborate scheme where he reduced vast swaths of the textbook into a shorthand notation that he printed onto his hands with ultraviolet ink... ...then he put a tiny l.e.d. blacklight in the bridge of his glasses.  much harder than simply studying, of course.
shortly:
	shortly
shorts:
	- your coat is covered in old jelly stains and you breath smells like beef wellington. be still, my heart. and the clincher? i can almost hear the crab lice playing volleyball in your shorts.
shots:
	listen, i'm getting tired of you calling the shots here!
shouted:
	704704;  advice is shouted
shouts:
	the salesman's head is now extremely large, easily twice the width and height of the other man's head. he shouts after the man, who has left, spit flying from his mouth. the duck-creature is confused.
shoved:
	 the backbone of marriage is about to get a shiv shoved through it
shoving:
	by playing hard to get, i'll become a legend--in a way i never could by shoving myself in people's faces and letting them see my flaws!
shower:
	- hey! what's so funny, huh? can't a guy take a shower in peace without allyou yapping away?
showered:
	norville is showered with sprockets.
shrapnel:
	 writing "...was dismembered by shrapnel from...from an incendiary..."
shreds:
	 in fact the only thing appreciating at all around here is this honus wagner baseball card *rip to shreds*
shrek:
	caption shrek the third outdoor advertising creative meeting.
shriek:
	lopez  our people lie merely asleep in their graves, waiting to shriek forth and bring agonizing death to any who would dare disturb their peace.
shrieking:
	sylvie you think i?m limited to moving envelopes?  huh?  i have seen horrors in the netherworld you can scarcely imagine!  wretched beasts rent limb from limb shrieking in pain while other beasts cackle!  oh, i can think of some horrible things, all right.  i can make life miserable!
shrink:
	pat missed the whole "spring cleaning meets ebay" concept by a freaking mile.  and now i gotta start thinking about christmas presents?  i've got dvds from last christmas still in the shrink-wrap!
shrug:
	  shrug it off 
shtick:
	that's my point! everyone else has to come up with their own shtick!
shuffle:
	bart we'll be up front hearing people cough and shuffle around, while cameras all around us are capturing instants, preserving the most fleeting of glances, showing us (and those to come after us) more than we could ever notice on our own.  in a way, the day when everyone gathers and performs the ceremony is simply a run-through for the cameras.  the documentary evidence is what lasts forever.
shuts:
	ross  i downloaded this app that shuts down my network connection, hides everything on my desktop, and disables every other program except for a bare-bones text editor.
shuttle:
	mahmoud we could, like, ram the space shuttle with a blimp.
shyness:
	alex no conversation will result.  there is no potential for rejection.  think of it simply as a training exercise to banish shyness.
si:
	closeup the tape reads ...almost burst out laughing.  her thorax looked so fat.  she cannot get away with wearing that..at her si...
sic:
	a strange-looking lipstick "5. no need to get dolled up any longer, now that your obssessive (sic) gardening has killed romance? use that lipstick to mark crop rows in the vegetable garden. the oily stain will serve as a warning to the sprouting plants never to set their sights too high."
sickbed:
	the doctor is leaning over tommy, who's lying on a sickbed, and is holding tommy's wrist.
sicko:
	- what?  no! / it's a television isolation pod.  (sicko)
sideburns:
	his bangs are crooked.  sideburns look like spider's nests.  poor fellow might as well have stuck his head in the garbage disposal!
sided:
	john who decided they should announce the score by saying which team's winning?  that seems one-sided.  people love underdogs, right?  framing the score in terms of which team has an obstacle to overcome would be more engaging!
sidekick:
	ruth i know, but hating him seems so easy. he's a sneering beanpole on grainy videotapes with a watermelon-shaped beard! all he needs is a cackling ferret sidekick to be a mid-'90s disney villain!
sidewalk:
	- that's it! i've had quite enough of your unwelcome advances! one more word, and you're on the sidewalk!
siegfried:
	 swan lake 3 die siegfried die
sienna:
	yuri ...then i mix in a little burnt sienna, to match the color of the bricks.
sift:
	- we must sift the ashes through water and drink!
sighed:
	madge dirk sighed, shivering in the autumn chill.  "the house is leaking ghosts and the car is leaking oil.  what a week!"
sighing:
	sick  by day, i lay on the ground moaning and rocking in agony... by night, i stared at the ceiling, willing sleep to come, begging some spirit of rest to glance over my shattered body and, sighing, say "i'll take him." after hours of this i would look at the clock and realize only minutes had passed. time had lifted its foot from the accelerator and was slowly coasting to a stop. i would be trapped in that pain for a hundred thousand years.
sighted:
	443443;  a terror is sighted
sights:
	a strange-looking lipstick "5. no need to get dolled up any longer, now that your obssessive (sic) gardening has killed romance? use that lipstick to mark crop rows in the vegetable garden. the oily stain will serve as a warning to the sprouting plants never to set their sights too high."
signatures:
	clive  how are you getting so many signatures for lobster rights?
signers:
	arvid either my identical twin brother - with whom i share a strange and unexplained psychic bond - is about to come to severe physical harm or my massive multinational organization is about to have its global strategy dictated by the signers of an internet petition!
signs:
	young  the, um, pyrex mixing cylinder showed signs of use.
silences:
	 taft was a well-known yukster but jimmy here would cause the most awkward of silences at all the state dinners
silhouetted:
	a small boy sees a silhouetted figure.
silk:
	- it's like slippery silk.
similarities:
	bob  i guess it's got some similarities in the random nature of it all.
simmer:
	 simmer at 
simpleton:
	this is zion, o simpleton.  thusly have i christened my sanctuary, my ascetic outpost, which secludes me from all worldly cares.
simplified:
	wo  but everything we know is simplified to some degree. even if we're experts down to the atomic level--there's alway the subatomic.
simpson:
	 o.j. simpson swanson
simulated:
	in a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, vr-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | america, japan, soviet russia, victorian britain, medieval europe, aztec empire, atlantis, terraformed mars, antarctica, one-way spaceflight, outer rim world, set from road warrior,
simultaneously:
	all your interactions colored by people either flirting with you or judging you.  sometimes both simultaneously.
sincerity:
	jason try amping up the sincerity.  else i may dash my worthless body on the rocks!
sinker:
	fat   i felt like a monster!  like some kind of deformed creature.  what a beastly feeling.  a real spirit-sinker.
sins:
	jesus i don't believe this. you secularists make me sick. seriously, if dying for the sins of the world doesn't get a guy on the nice list, i don't know what does.
sip:
	 have a sip at 
sipping:
	 read it while sipping tea
sisters:
	- excuse me, sisters, but my airplane seems to -
sittin:
	john  "what...does...she got to say/ sittin' in the...middle of the...
situationist:
	top hat  but the whole point of detournement, from a strict situationist perspective, is to divert bourgeois cultural elements to new subversive roles! the spectacle's great recuperative powers are hijacked to instead serve as a vehicle for revolutionary communique!
situations:
	 there is much that goes unremembered in these situations
sixth:
	leon that's why i should be your first choice for pet surgery!  i'll display an inhuman detachment during your snookie's suffering, or you get half off your first cremation!   leon's budget veterinary - on sixth, upstairs from payday-loans-n-go!
skating:
	a lovely moonlight night of skating on the pond!
skeevy:
	seashore.  a woman is standing with her hands in her hair, possibly tying back a loose strand.  an old skeevy man pinches her on the bottom.
skeletonized:
	two men stand over a skeletonized corpse.
skeptically:
	laverne is regarding him skeptically.
ski:
	 ski trip.  very dangerous.  if you never see me again- if i don't survive- always know - i loved you as best a man could love a goddess.
skiiinnn:
	bystander (said as if dying) my skiiinnn
skins:
	(4) peel all potatoes (fig. 3) before inserting into the injector. potato-skins will clog the needle.
skulls:
	 touch skulls with 
skunk:
	prof. yogi  i am a monk! not a drunk not a skunk just a monk!
skwrrktt:
	<<skwrrktt>>
skylit:
	joanne upstairs, i'm turning the second bedroom into a fully skylit sunroom complete with floor-to-ceiling windows and a solar-heated lap pool?
skywriting:
	thea there's not gonna be a tournament.  nobody's gonna show up.  i know we've worked hard, with the flyers, the radio spots, and lord knows the skywriting wasn't cheap...
slab:
	girl lying on slab no, thank you! i'm so excited
slabs:
	- ...is one night closer to veal chops slathered with mustard on rye slabs.
slack:
	- he's always late, so we start the day behind, and i've got to make up the slack.
slacking:
	hulda how can you turn even slacking off from a project into a project
slake:
	 i shall tap your artery and slake my eternal thirst. then no longer will you walk among the living.
slam:
	<<slam>>
slap:
	johnson oh, man, dèj‡ v˚, weird.  next you're gonna drag me out in the parking lot and slap me.
slapping:
	 guessing it pretty much went like this in real life, except with the wordy objection replaced by celebratory back-slapping
slathered:
	- ...is one night closer to veal chops slathered with mustard on rye slabs.
slaughter:
	 why don't you? that's food! that's calories and energy! that's sunlight and diesel and the slaughter of animals! i won't let it be for nothing!
slaughtered:
	bobby i bet my dumb parents never slaughtered a defenseless fishing village and took their women for scullery maids!
slavery:
	 also slavery is wrong
slaying:
	clara i wonder if i will be immortalized as a heroine in one of his magical tales of the fantastic!  a princess slaying a deadly dragon to save her people from mass devouring!
sleeper:
	 i'm incredibly curious to see how convoluted this santa mythos will get as they try to keep it plausible for ten more years.  will he eventually be cloned?  have sleeper cells across the world?  be revealed to be an alien?  who will tire of the ruse first??
sleepy:
	 on warm, bright days, were-cat mysteriously transforms into sleepy sunbeam cat
sleeved:
	two aliens with long spiky feathers crowning their bird-style feathered heads address a middle-aged woman with her hair pulled back severely, dressed in a long-sleeved dark dress with an apron.  she is holding a round serving tray in her right hand, angled against her body, and has her left arm akimbo. she responds to them in a matter-of-fact yet kindly manner.
sleuth:
	 sleuth around 
slice:
	the hollow top half of a ball "3. instead of discarding the half-balls left over from a game of slice-the-ball-in-the-garden, use them to cap off leaky sprinklers or plug gopher holes. the rubber balls are biodegradable, given a long enough timeline."
slid:
	- i knew i shoulda slid into the drawer.
slide:
	  slide through 
slides:
	phil it's a joy both immediate and fleeting.  you stay in bed too long, you get a headache.  it's just that first moment, when your body slides back into the covers  - man!
slime:
	- i'll bet it's some new slime mold.
slimmer:
	a large woman looks at herself in a full-length mirror.  a much-slimmer woman sits in a wicker chair nearby, holding a parasol.
slinky:
	nora sure, might as well be a slinky made out of butter.
slipped:
	evan mom and dad slipped up and revealed foreknowledge of certain presents that were ostensibly from "santa."
slippery:
	- it's like slippery silk.
slips:
	geno you are weak.  the chair is made of butter.  it slips from your grasp so easily.
slither:
	jeff if only i could speak the name of the beast, i might rebuke her.  but its alien syllables slither past my tongue like a soapy worm.
slobber:
	- depends. is there slobber all over the valve?
sloppily:
	the strip consists of three photos of people hastily cut from a magazine and stapled to a sheet of paper. boxes, text, and speech bubbles are drawn in sloppily by hand
sloth:
	i swear, getting you to move is like a lame, one-legged ancestor of a sloth who's twice as slow trying to use a frayed old piece of crunchy vine to pull a cruise ship!
slots:
	greg but i still got my pockets too full of stuff.  you gotta get on this problem.  i'm talking about expansion slots.
slowdown:
	delia yeah, for an eighty percent slowdown all we'd need is what, 50 gallons of gerbil blood?
slurs:
	jill oh yeah.  and i hope you've got a budget for litigation defense - your ad materials are full of terms that some would consider highly offensive racial slurs.
slut:
	crusty bill everyone less promiscuous than me is a prude!  everyone more promiscuous is a slut!
sluurrrrppppp:
	 sluurrrrppppp
smallpox:
	bob  you're right.  sign me up for smallpox instead.
smear:
	ariel misbehavior has become his palette, our apartment his canvas, in a grand, grotesque installation - featuring us as predictable foils, our fury as much a deliberate part of the work as each precisely-browned fiber of shag.  more than a simple befoulment - this is a befoulment of order, a metaphorical poop-smear on the very notion of animal subjugation.
smek:
	<<smek>>
smiled:
	evan narrating i said "does santa give you hints in advance of what he's going to bring?  are his notes written in magic ink on north pole stationery that dissolves after a single read, leaving no evidence behind?"  and then i added "oh, the magic of it all!" and batted my eyelashes until they smiled.  they get to play the game another year.
smith:
	john  john smith.
smiths:
	john  i look up other john smiths in the phone book, then steal checks from their mailboxes.
smokable:
	man #1 that i once caught going through my desk looking for anything remotely smokable. he has secrets on everybody.
smokey:
	man #2 so anti-smokey has now been promoted to...
smooth:
	simon, who will...  free-range hen eggs delicately cracked into a porcelain bowl, the yolk and albumen whipped until smooth with a silver whisk, then seared on a steaming griddle until golden and fluffy.
smoother:
	carla  do you at least want some tips that might make it go smoother for you?
smoothie:
	young  yes, i'd like to return this single-serving smoothie maker.
smoothly:
	"directions. 1. if the box you have obtained is larger than the prescribed size, cut it down to size. we have done extensive testing and our size is unequivocally the best. if your box needs to be watertight (say, if some of your unfinished projects involve plumbing, rainwater reclamation, or crab-husbandry) be sure to seal the new seams you are creating with plumber's goop. also take care to cut straight so that your seams will join smoothly. really 80% of this project is getting the seams right. the rest is just putting stuff in a box."
smothering:
	society is slowly folding in upon itself and smothering those of us foolish enough to have taken solace beneath its comfortable drape!
smugly:
	an excited-looking man carrying a sack of money approaches a salesman with a large head, who is grinning smugly and gesturing to a creature. the creature is like a small boy, with the head of a duck, bill wide open, and a small top hat.
snail:
	- i just lay down for a nap. my head feels like a snail.
snake:
	 snake your pipes 
snakebite:
	ralph  hey, mike?  remember the time i saved you from that snakebite?
snapping:
	older  have you ever been, say, eating a piece of chicken, and you feel your tooth scrape against the bone or you hear a tendon snapping a certain way...
snappy:
	 i guarantee i will never buy a car from the cerritos auto center but boy can i give you some snappy directions to it
snaps:
	rose oh snaps! when did i put it on silent?
snapshot:
	pablo do you know who i am?  i am pablo!  i have shot covers for elle and cosmo and portuguese vogue!  i am paid ten thousand dollars for a single perfect photograph!  my work fills the finest galleries, the most luxurious hotels, the homes and summer homes and yachts and summer yachts of the world's elite!  and you want me to take a tourist snapshot?  of you?
snarf:
	oh, stuff it.  where's your spine?  are you tygra or snarf?
snatch:
	 snatch up  
snatched:
	hastings has stabbed rich uncle pennybags (the monopoly guy) and snatched his wallet.  eli is appalled.
snatching:
	father soon, nothing will be handed to you any longer. you will fight for everything, snatching every small victory from the unrelenting jaws of fate.
snazzy:
	edgar strolls along in his snazzy dolphin pants.
sneakily:
	man and woman are gone. cat on piano looks around sneakily. nothing in panel background.
sniffin:
	 i picked the wrong day to quit sniffin' glue
sniffing:
	- was it the crotch-sniffing that tipped you off?
sniffs:
	man sniffs
snippers:
	rocky that's an outrage!  i say, let them try - for i swear by odie's fuzzy muzzle that anyone bringing nut-snippers near my joy-bag will meet a dire, bloody end!
snippy:
	 get snippy 
snl:
	larry they made a dance mix from my tugboat sounds!  then pretty girls with ukuleles did covers of the dance mix.  honey.  andy samberg played me on snl.  making boat noises.  they love me.  they want what i got.
snnrblnkk:
	darrow no, it was more of a "frrbggnngglbb!" or like a "snnrblnkk!"
sno:
	 what the--holy crap in a sno-cone!
snoogums:
	garth okay, snoogums.  hope you can get on the snooze express.
snookie:
	leon that's why i should be your first choice for pet surgery!  i'll display an inhuman detachment during your snookie's suffering, or you get half off your first cremation!   leon's budget veterinary - on sixth, upstairs from payday-loans-n-go!
snookums:
	woman who's a cuddly little snookums?
snores:
	 the whole thing was clearly a pork project from the get-go.  it doesn't make sound economic sense to lay high-speed rail track all the way from bakersfield to fresno just so one person can fall asleep faster.  even if she is adorable when she snores
snowman:
	 she will not be putting the snowman decorations back in the yard for marchmas.
snowstorm:
	a woman approaches another woman, sitting on a porch stoop in the midst of a snowstorm.
snuffed:
	lincoln i rather think i'd prefer to be attacked by some sort of poisoned razor bees to be stung, poisoned, and lacerated to death than to be snuffed by a common poor person.
snug:
	cap'n pegwood you'll be snug back at home in no time.
snugglebaby:
	woman i want some kisses from my snugglebaby.
soaked:
	earl  i soaked them in lime juice overnight, then deep-fried them in mayonnaise!
soapy:
	jeff if only i could speak the name of the beast, i might rebuke her.  but its alien syllables slither past my tongue like a soapy worm.
soar:
	reginald  you know, soar.  flappity-flap like a bird, or however it does it.
soaring:
	- soaring above the pitiful world below, i am undisputed master of all i survey!
sob:
	paperboy extra! extra!  p-paperboys... run like girls!  *sob*
sober:
	edgar i'm tired of drinking my life away.   time to sober up and get back to the real world.
sobers:
	- what really sobers you up is the no refunds policy!
socialize:
	 socialize at 
sociopathic:
	 a ton of sunk costs have gone into this food. you can't just toss it! that's sociopathic. that's nero, fiddling while rome burns. the food version.
sociopathically:
	leon a better vet would be someone sociopathically indifferent to the suffering of god's creatures.  only then would he or she be able to maintain professionalism in the face of each day's crippling tragedy.
socket:
	it's a lamp, the body of which is an entire turtle with the socket coming out of its mouth and the base emerging somewhat farther south.
sod:
	- sod it!
softball:
	 passed out right before he went back for the softball bat
soften:
	mack  once lightning hits our rod, the charge will travel down the copper gutters, superheat the doorknob assembly, and momentarily soften the deadbolt enough for me to batter the door open.
software:
	octavio like playing video games?  for every hour you play, some korean kid plays five.  name any sport you like.  some dweeb-o's been at it all day every day since he could walk.  and forget about creative media.  in this day and age, not even the most avid hobbyist can compete with "pirated software and zero social life."
soil:
	cynthia i will flourish here!  the soil is rich with nitrates!  better than that carpeting in your apartment!
soiled:
	 it's soiled forever
soiling:
	a gardening tool is just any possession you don't mind irreparably soiling, charles
soldiers:
	two soldiers are on patrol.
solicited:
	661661;  an opinion is solicited
solicitors:
	benjy  a petition to ban irritating street solicitors?
solves:
	josh  i got a great idea for a product.  it's perfect, it fills a needs, solves a common problem.
sons:
	jimbo please!  help!  barbarians have attacked our village!  our sons have been lost to their swords, our daughters to their lusts...
sonuva:
	gentle sonuva yarrrggh
sonya:
	334334;  sonya cannot be idle
sooo:
	woman everyone thinks having  a baby is sooo special.
soooooo:
	 soooooo...you wanna see it?
soothe:
	 soothe your soul at 
soothing:
	 relax my pet and allow my soothing voice to explain away your distress
sophist:
	 in sophist argument, "i demand pie!" = automatic win
sopping:
	 sopping wet at 
sorely:
	 a sorely needed addition to those little travel kits with the eye-masks and the mini-socks
sorrow:
	- how tragic! a victim of society's scorn, you cope with the stigma by drowning your sorrow's in further consumption!
sorrowful:
	 through the quiet crackle of cooling embers she thought she almost heard him weeping. but it was probably just a faint hiss of steam, or else the wind, or else the sorrowful ghosts of her long year full of many purposeful misdeeds
sought:
	383383;  a fortune is sought
soulless:
	clara actually, that'd be great!  you spend all the advertising money, bringing people to this corner to buy books...and then when my kind of people get disgusted by your soulless shell of a store, they'll come and patronize me!
sounded:
	- it sounded kinda human... but that's crazy!
southwestern:
	woman we have established a wintergreen napkin palette.  these turquoise pepper mills you found suggest a fundamentally southwestern character.
souvenir:
	wendy are you done being a souvenir grump?  can i look around now, your highness?
sowah:
	sowah what are you people doing in my house
sox:
	otto then you won't mind in the least if i pay you back for the lunch with tainted 1919 black sox dollars...?
soy:
	darrell iced decaf grande raspberry soy no-whip light-ice mocha!
soybean:
	- i know how to ensure that our son will change the world!  his first and middle names should be some other, famous name, as in "martin luther king". / or "george washington carver, soybean hero".
spaceflight:
	in a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, vr-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | america, japan, soviet russia, victorian britain, medieval europe, aztec empire, atlantis, terraformed mars, antarctica, one-way spaceflight, outer rim world, set from road warrior,
spaceship:
	 we did stock the cruiser with extra matter to account for energy spent in transit, but there are only so many cows you can cram into a spaceship
spade:
	 we've all seen the bumper stickers that say i [heart] ny or i [spade] my cat, but who's seen the ones that say i [club] my wife
spanking:
	- only a very dirty girl, that's who! i think someone needs a spanking!
sparse:
	if the sparse hair on each digit stiffened and elongated into whiskers, and those rigid tendons on my feet became long, whipping tails, possessed of an independent dark energy?
spattered:
	the stage is now spattered with blood and gore and body parts are strewn about.
spawn:
	 spawn 
spda:
	the clue for 39 across is "spda., e.g."
speakeasy:
	diane did we fail the speakeasy test or is this really a shoe place?
speaker:
	speaker hogblotter very well, let it be law.  any place with two or more persons gathered must blare christmas music incessantly for the entire month of december.
spearmint:
	 whiskey, gin, vodka, spearmint schnapps...
specialize:
	  if i knew anything about gun control, or campus law enforcement, or even korean immigration - maybe i'd have a shot.  but you have to really specialize if you want to be the expert.  and my stupid niche has yet to come up.  
specialized:
	the headline reads "non-traditional gardening tools. rather than spending for specialized implements, use these household items" several numbered pictures are displayed.
specialty:
	- thanks, but i can't take all the credit... i've been ordering specialty meats based on some suggestions i got on the internet. who would have thought strangers would be so helpful?
species:
	547547;  the species is bettered
specifics:
	stumpy the main problem is that you just get bogged down in so many details.  i say, forget the specifics.  you're just giving people more to disagree with.  just find that compelling core idea - that little kernel buried deep inside.  selling his tiny fried chicken.
specify:
	gax to an incinerated, and annoyed, rob i did not specify what kind of luck.
specious:
	  specious argument #61 in favor of sci-fi being the best of all genres
specks:
	nabil washing the car!  how decadent!  so great that you have no more pressing problems than making sure your giant optional machine is free of specks of dust!
spectacles:
	a man wearing a porkpie hat, sitting on a bench reading his newspaper. he removes his spectacles.
spectacularly:
	419419;  an enterprise fails spectacularly
spectator:
	spectator tourette's?
speculum:
	- as you can see, our portable device saves the patient the embarassment and awkwardness of the traditional stirrups and speculum. - i'll begin the exam by inserting a small amount of lubricating paste to help her open and allow light in. - gee! - nurse, please bring in a dose of gyno-paste. (my own formula.) - you may experience some slight discomfort. - hope you're not allergic to peanut butter.  get a clue at   modesty, chastity, virtue
speedily:
	the mangler. should your handicrafts call for fresh bone marrow, this bench-mounted device will extract it speedily.  why pay more for store-bought?  fresh is unmatched for flavor.  $3.50
speeds:
	 it has three speeds and a 'liquefy' setting
speedy:
	goat fox, if you're reading herb's mail, you are scum, and i pray every day for your speedy, painful demise.
spelled:
	alpha-bits cereal.  "plane" was spelled out in letters, the "e" spinning like a prop.
spews:
	count twiggy when the moon hangs full...when its cratered surface spews maddening light upon the midnight land below...this becomes a cat!
spice:
	- you know. sugar, spice. the usual.
spider:
	his bangs are crooked.  sideburns look like spider's nests.  poor fellow might as well have stuck his head in the garbage disposal!
spiel:
	gwench everything barks for your attention, and you indulge it.  you don't have to do it all.  it's not worth it.  like when we went on our trip - remember that tour guide?  "this is a rare chance, we almost never get to see the inside of the factor," that whole spiel?
spiffy:
	ralph is piloting his spiffy steam-powered car.
spikes:
	 they are squeezing coins in their hands, forging them into barbed metal spikes that they are driving through the foreheads of the -- yes yes we know it's tuesday geez
spiky:
	two aliens with long spiky feathers crowning their bird-style feathered heads address a middle-aged woman with her hair pulled back severely, dressed in a long-sleeved dark dress with an apron.  she is holding a round serving tray in her right hand, angled against her body, and has her left arm akimbo. she responds to them in a matter-of-fact yet kindly manner.
spilling:
	- dear mrs. crabtree, i'm sorry for spilling ink on your new desk. i sold a kidney to pay for the refinishing, because hey, i've got two, right?
spineless:
	spineless marvin yes ma'am i'm sorry something came up
spiracles:
	 decipher  /  i don't know who she thinks she's fooling but those spiracles are not real.
spiritually:
	clarence christmas these days is only sacred to accountants tabulating retail sales figures.  can't we set aside our selfish urges just for one day, and concentrate on the true, spiritually meaningful roots of the holiday season?
spiteful:
	marvin my resentful attitude toward fatherhood will yield spiteful and maladjusted children. on my deathbed, i will plead with them for reconciliation. to no avail.
spits:
	katie so if we feed the system visionaries, and it spits them out as mediocrities...then what we need is some sort of extreme double mega-visionary who'll get worn down to the level of 'visionary.'
spittle:
	  next comes the agitated, spittle-flinging air-boxing
splattered:
	same as panel two, only the man's face is splattered with gore and he looks shocked and horrified.
splendored:
	252252; girls are many-splendored things
spliced:
	they had to be spliced.  and selected.  and bred.  and enchanted.
splints:
	mack  then, we'll pry off all the rain gutters, lashing them end-to-end with bits of the ladder using sticks as splints.
split:
	lawyer split among two million defendants, that's a cool nine bucks cash for your, my friend!
splity:
	student we sing songs about how mexicans are lazy, kids go to mexicans-are-lazy camp, there's all this ritual chanting...  but now is a tough time.  recently the church splity into factions - my group thinks zacatecanos are the laziest, but some crazy nutjobs think it's oaxacans. what a bunch of idiots!
spock:
	spock thank you, sir. for both of us.
spoilsport:
	 really, spoilsport, it's much funnier if you think you are breathing poop.  and normally 'particulates' seals the deal.
spoken:
	will you teach your children the spoken language of the mighty horse, so she is not the last conversationalist of her strange and lilting dialect?
sponges:
	geno your fingers are like sponges.  so weak.  so terribly, achingly, tremblingly weak.
sponsors:
	maurice we're his sponsors.  it's the least we can do.  it's all part of rehab.
spook:
	 spook the horses at 
spoon:
	todd become what?  partners in a whaling boat?  rival spoon collectors?  veterinary urologists?
spoonfuls:
	 i'm not gonna dirty a tupperware for three spoonfuls of spaghetti! washing it will be even more wasteful! hot water! soap! time!
sports:
	teddy  so you're the ones at airports and sports arenas raking customers over the coals for needing to eat!
spotlight:
	jen hard to let go of the spotlight.  everyone asking me if i was all right.  everyone caring about me for the first time.  and...i'd like to think that maybe...you can still care about me, even after all this.  am i wrong?
spouses:
	sheldon are we still doing this?  seriously?  this stereotype is still clinging to life?  first, the "nerds are all frustrated virgins" thing.  some of the nerdiest people i know are highly sexual women.  and millions of nerds have spouses twice as nerdy as they are.  and the mom's basement thing?  the nerds i know live in geodesic domes or multi-story treehouses or, at the very least, condos with garages big enough to hold their trebuchets.
spouters:
	 people who are often misunderstood 6% geniuses; 94% garden-variety nonsense-spouters
sprawl:
	he continues to fly over the urban sprawl.
spraypainted:
	gregg seeing that the word "poop" has been spraypainted on his house ah!  graffiti!
sprays:
	seth enters and sprays norville with a substance from a tank carried on his back.
spreading:
	later, barnes is spreading sauce over a horse-sized chunk of meat, roasting on a spit.
spreadsheets:
	alfie i just got a call from the auditors!  our spreadsheets are a total mess!
spree:
	man 1 aunt zelda was one of the original members of polyphonic spree
springs:
	in a burst of sound, a complicated device of gears, wheels, and several horns springs from the top of the bum's hat!
springy:
	a pastoral field, dotted with trees. the weather is clear and springy.
sprint:
	father katie, honey, you're being very silly.  jules is a turtle. / the polls close in an hour.  at a dead sprint he'd barely make it to the kitchen.
sprouting:
	a strange-looking lipstick "5. no need to get dolled up any longer, now that your obssessive (sic) gardening has killed romance? use that lipstick to mark crop rows in the vegetable garden. the oily stain will serve as a warning to the sprouting plants never to set their sights too high."
spruce:
	agnes  now, that's real spruce!
spun:
	- ...finally he says, "your hair is like spun gold - and your eyes, like magnificent pools of sapphire sunlight." i didn't know what to say.
spunk:
	with the help of a { sarcastic female techno-geek, tomboyish female mechanic, shape-shifting female assassin, leather-clad female in shades, girl who's always loved him, bookish female scholar with mousy brown hair, cherubic girl with pigtails and spunk, female who inexplicably becomes attracted to the damaged protagonist for unstated reasons
spurned:
	008008;  friendship is spurned
spurts:
	laverne's son appears.  his head is missing and blood spurts from the stump.
sputnik:
	deanna so we found some old tv antennas, spray-painted a basketball, and bam!  sputnik.
spying:
	- so, the only logical explanation is that the publisher is spying on me! watching my every move, sharting my every emotion... my privacy is gone! my civil liberties violated! i hope my hair looks okay.
squanders:
	culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.
squareish:
	a squareish design is shown, divided into parts, that say "carpet," "wood," "c8, ny," and "621 b'way." parquet and inlaid floors, borders for rugs, baseboards, decks, crown molding, doors, anything wood feeds our weird fetish.
squash:
	 cool cabana - squash banana - sing it julio
squat:
	wider shot of employer and employee. we see the employer is quite tall and dignified, and the employee is short and squat.
squawk:
	duckworth (duck shadow)  steady, isabella.  the tremors in your voice are natural.  for ours is a love that dares not squawk its name!
squeakin:
	 they've been squeakin' and squealin', so i'm fixin' to oil 'em but good.
squeal:
	the squeal of pigs in harmony
squealin:
	 they've been squeakin' and squealin', so i'm fixin' to oil 'em but good.
squealing:
	madge cautiously they crept around the corner.  was that squealing the sound of...a ghost?
squeezed:
	 fresh squeezed 
squinting:
	dora so he sits there squinting at his hands the whole time, trying to decode the textbook... really a totally unworkable solution.   he barely managed a c-plus.
squishier:
	dwight sure, the first person to eat a pumpkin probably did s because it was there.  it was a crisp october day?the only sound the crunching of leaves and the slightly squishier sound of the very first pumpkin being et.
squishy:
	doctor yes...yes, that's a nice piece. that sounds tender. resonant, yet squishy.
sr:
	martin luther king, sr. speaks out
sssayyyy:
	 sssayyyy yyyeessss
stabbin:
	woman where is he -- let me at the bastard -- next time you try to pay off a jilted lover, david !, you'd best be sure the check don't bounce. fool gon' wish he'd been born without eyeballs, once i gets to stabbin'.
stabbing:
	  you were at my mom's house...except it was sort of like a school for some reason...and everyone from work was in my mom's kitchen taking a class...only they weren't cooking...they were all stabbing each other
stack:
	when i broke the water main, i awoke a fearsome hydro-dragon who intends to devour us all unless i bring him a giant stack of cookies.
stackable:
	projects are stackable. it's not that i'm starting something new before finishing something old - i'm nesting the new project inside the old. if it has screws, they shall be turned. if it has bolts, they shall be loosened. if it has rivets, they may get along for a while without being pried open, but that probably won't last.
stacked:
	a man in a top hat holding a cane greets a secretary, next to a table stacked with books inside some sort of library.
stacks:
	calvin oh, i've searched for it for ages.  pored through dusty stacks to no avail.  searched every catalog i could get my grubby paws on?but where i failed, lad, you prevailed.  tell me!  how did you locate it?  on which remove bookshelf did you peep its flaking spine?
stadium:
	joanne and rather than park our cars tandem, i'm installing a hoist that will store the cars one atop the other.  long-term, i have plans to build a stadium-style rolling roof to protect our entire property from hailstorms.
staff:
	bearded  every detail is authentic. the trains keep accurate schedules. the "staff" wear authentic uniforms. i even bought an actual uniform on ebay for the fabric!
stag:
	woman that's okay, you can still go stag, right?
staggering:
	lawyer and millions of people use these dangerous zippers every day! the potential for serious injury is staggering.
stain:
	a strange-looking lipstick "5. no need to get dolled up any longer, now that your obssessive (sic) gardening has killed romance? use that lipstick to mark crop rows in the vegetable garden. the oily stain will serve as a warning to the sprouting plants never to set their sights too high."
stained:
	tim tried em  got em dirty  stained and such
stains:
	- your coat is covered in old jelly stains and you breath smells like beef wellington. be still, my heart. and the clincher? i can almost hear the crab lice playing volleyball in your shorts.
stake:
	 stake a gambit at 
staleness:
	mitchell  the staleness of your wisecracks.
stalkery:
	rose should i call him again? or is once an hour too stalkery?
stalks:
	a bear in an ill-fitting hat stalks away angrily.
stall:
	mr. kabob  blah blah blah boo-hoo crybaby wants everything for nothing.  you know how expensive it is to rent a retail stall at a major airport?  if we charged street prices we'd be broke in a week.
stalls:
	all hearing echoes of the guy three stalls down when he blinks.
stampy:
	 stampy, you want to race a train?
stance:
	jordan  he's taking his stance for the lunge.
stanky:
	 like so many of us, convincing himself that his job is critically important to the world is the only thing that gets herve out of bed and into that stanky diving gear every morning.
stapled:
	the strip consists of three photos of people hastily cut from a magazine and stapled to a sheet of paper. boxes, text, and speech bubbles are drawn in sloppily by hand
stapler:
	  what's that, cindy?  yes, i realize that you're smart, too, i'm very sorry.  now please take my stapler out of your ear.
starbucks:
	exterior of a popular coffeshop - okay it's starbucks
starpincher:
	felix wearing a jetpack check it out!  i just finished the upgrade to my starpincher!  put in a double-chamber preboiler and a hundred-torque turnvalve.  zero to forty-five in a click point seven.  hah!
startin:
	umberto aw yeah now things are startin' to happen!
starved:
	- lordy, i'm saved! i'm starved, and badly hurt!
stately:
	an airy, well-lit club dining room. two gentlemen of stately bearing are standing in the foreground.
statements:
	remember what the therapist said.  frame the situation using "i feel" statements.
static:
	 it was making all sorts of screeching noises and when you turn the knobs there is static
stationery:
	evan narrating i said "does santa give you hints in advance of what he's going to bring?  are his notes written in magic ink on north pole stationery that dissolves after a single read, leaving no evidence behind?"  and then i added "oh, the magic of it all!" and batted my eyelashes until they smiled.  they get to play the game another year.
statistics:
	359359;  rich reads statistics
statue:
	the four finalists in a costume contest are dressed as a native american, the statue of liberty, a valkyrie and a soldier.
stavros:
	stavros  for me it would be mediterreanean olives, yougurts, figs and dates!
stayed:
	agnes well it stayed out too long!  they got more snap when they're fresh!
stayin:
	but he got his!  four and a half hours o' night-vision video of him stayin' after hours an' humpin' the welding robots!
stays:
	despite ridiculous prices and consistently horrible customer service, kinko's somehow stays in business.
stead:
	maggie so...in twenty years the chinese business world will be flooded with these kids!  if we want to stay one step ahead, we have to get billy in good stead for the next big powerhouse.  brazil. / john "one step ahead?"  you mean, if we want to one-up millie spangler. / maggie she's beat us on homebirth.  she's beat us on preschool.  john.  this is our only chance.
stealing:
	jeff i like that.  your current tooth-cleaning method is stealing time from your life and you don't even know it.  now, you can add - what?  five minutes a day?  ten?  fifteen?  add that time back.
steamovak:
	beth well, steamovak, i think we gotta figure out a new plan.
steampunk:
	ashton and two other men  steampunk'd!
steamroller:
	lucy the mannheim steamroller lobby thanks the people of america.  democracy works!
steamship:
	thad passes a group of men watching a steamship pass by.
steelhouse:
	waiter  let's see...rusty tricycle, uncleburglar, steelhouse stiltwalker, boogerbrau, prancing minotaur, dunderschnauzen, chairfarter stout, and aardshark.
steep:
	coal in the home. the family in question had attached turbine-boilers to every device in the home toasters, refrigerators, can-openers &c. what reports fail to mention is that the lady of the house works in a factory where the small boilers are manufactured. she acquires them at a steep discount. this is clearly out of range for the average family.
steeples:
	are we talking mountain-vaulting altitudes or is it more a graze-the-steeples type of affair?
steering:
	- no sir, this is a steering wheel, or what we call a "tiller."
stein:
	the two-headed purple monster from "sesame street," frank & stein.
stem:
	- well, on the off chance that they've been eating paint chips, it'll make their brain stem explode.
stenographer:
	lulu and you're the one who wanted the stenographer.
stephen:
	on the feast of stephen
stereoscopic:
	a stereoscopic image gus, atop his giant eagle glenda, attempts to lasso the piggybacked and gargantuan anthropomorphized hippos anton and jay.  mount banjo erupts  dramatically in the background.
stereotypes:
	father what happened to "i refuse to reinforce demeaning stereotypes?"
stewart:
	 next week, on martha stewart living
stiff:
	 if i no longer walked from place to place, but rather was ported about by the scurrying of forty tiny legs, pulling my stiff, upright body from place to place entirely in opposition to any will i might express?
stiffened:
	if the sparse hair on each digit stiffened and elongated into whiskers, and those rigid tendons on my feet became long, whipping tails, possessed of an independent dark energy?
stigma:
	- how tragic! a victim of society's scorn, you cope with the stigma by drowning your sorrow's in further consumption!
stilted:
	diane i see the appeal, but there's a strange stilted undercurrent of being treated like criminals at our wedding.
stilts:
	we see that adolphus and walt, along with jed, are standing on tall stilts.  jed is leaning back on a stick.
stiltwalker:
	waiter  let's see...rusty tricycle, uncleburglar, steelhouse stiltwalker, boogerbrau, prancing minotaur, dunderschnauzen, chairfarter stout, and aardshark.
stimulate:
	santa santa is very concerned with your cellulose intake!  it's how he tracks you!  i've also brought some pickled marzipan!  its horridness will stimulate your bile ducts and make you smell less appetizing to the stingroaches i have also brought you.  you should start taking their venom in small doses now, while you are still larval.  be cautious!  they are not tame.
stinging:
	 such hateful words! "pedophile, pedophile" --  i can still hear it stinging in my ears.
stingroach:
	 becoming immune to stingroach venom will help you stay conscious through the cleansing.  (christmas is a bit different on gax.)
stingroaches:
	santa santa is very concerned with your cellulose intake!  it's how he tracks you!  i've also brought some pickled marzipan!  its horridness will stimulate your bile ducts and make you smell less appetizing to the stingroaches i have also brought you.  you should start taking their venom in small doses now, while you are still larval.  be cautious!  they are not tame.
stings:
	wifred stings a bit
stinks:
	 life stinks at 
stinky:
	like a dirty stinky tooth
stipulated:
	harold for example, yesterday a guy asked why there's a surcharge for pickups from the airport.  hel-looo!   municipal regulations have stipulated that surcharge ever since it passed the city assembly!  it's completely detailed in the cab company's contract with the airport authority!
stirrups:
	- as you can see, our portable device saves the patient the embarassment and awkwardness of the traditional stirrups and speculum. - i'll begin the exam by inserting a small amount of lubricating paste to help her open and allow light in. - gee! - nurse, please bring in a dose of gyno-paste. (my own formula.) - you may experience some slight discomfort. - hope you're not allergic to peanut butter.  get a clue at   modesty, chastity, virtue
stirs:
	 one more glimpse of that alabaster flesh stirs in me a fever i'd but dreampt of on the boldest of painkillers.
stitched:
	man 1 his next of kin is a stitched-together construct of fur and bone and lipstick he calls "sally"
stoates:
	gibson girl  great--so let me show you the wilfred q. & barbara k. waddlesworth-stoates retreat for academic contemplation & personal self-actualization!
stockbroker:
	do you sleep on the most comfortable mattress in the world? of course you do not. the most comfortable mattress in the world is owned by an italian stockbroker. but we saw it in a magazine and modeled ours after what it is probably like. still most likely a step up for you. mattresses & meat
stoic:
	sidney  aaahh your constant, belittling gaze turns my venoms backward!  so much self-conscious that it cracks my stoic facade!
stomp:
	 and it's obvious. i know it's fulla poop. i'm not gonna stomp on it like a sucker.
stoop:
	a woman approaches another woman, sitting on a porch stoop in the midst of a snowstorm.
stoopid:
	- why you always gotta be clownin? you and that stoopid pony!
stor:
	a big metal cylinder marked cryo-stor (tm) holds the frozen body of a bearded man.
storage:
	bob you still working on that?  knock it off.  i gotta lock up.  your plank storage unit looks swell.  let's go home.
storming:
	pablo storming off hmph!
stout:
	waiter  let's see...rusty tricycle, uncleburglar, steelhouse stiltwalker, boogerbrau, prancing minotaur, dunderschnauzen, chairfarter stout, and aardshark.
stowed:
	jay of course!  happy to!  looks great!  you got all the covers tied, all the lines coiled?everything's stowed perfectly!  i didn't realize you were such a sailor!
straddled:
	273273;  a metaphorical fence is straddled
strains:
	professor i first made the acquaintance of young master malki ! when he came under my tutelage at oxford -- introduction to mad biochemistry, as i recall. frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. "malki !, my lad," i told him on more than one occasion, "if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then i fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world." but some boys just refuse to listen.
strand:
	seashore.  a woman is standing with her hands in her hair, possibly tying back a loose strand.  an old skeevy man pinches her on the bottom.
stranded:
	496496;  an ape is stranded
strangle:
	hank if you say 'you are old' i swear i will get up and strangle the life out of you.  i am not even kidding.   i am in a mood.
strata:
	"2. once your box is cut to size and sealed (as necessary), place your old project materials in the box. create dividers if desired. we recommend putting the oldest projects nearest the bottom to create a sort of strata of failure. that way you will not be too discouraged when you open the box; you will only see the birdhouse you failed to finish last week, rather than the solar-powered water-heater you discovered was way over your head three and a half years ago.*" "*for example."
strategic:
	592592; a strategic retreat
strawberries:
	would that all strawberries were as lovely!
stray:
	brian don't bite stray worms or you may end up horribly trapped forever
strenghtened:
	older  and you feel a sadness, in a way, because the chicken you eat today is factory-farmed, and your teeth are artificially strenghtened by fluoridated water, and you wonder if you would even survive back then...
stretches:
	the trenchcoat stretches and extends to cover jeff's arm.
strewn:
	the stage is now spattered with blood and gore and body parts are strewn about.
strict:
	top hat  but the whole point of detournement, from a strict situationist perspective, is to divert bourgeois cultural elements to new subversive roles! the spectacle's great recuperative powers are hijacked to instead serve as a vehicle for revolutionary communique!
strictly:
	354354;  this dude may not be strictly licensed
strides:
	dylan  my teacher said major strides have recently been made in heart research.
strife:
	135135;  scissors indirectly case strife
striped:
	 every george washington wears a little striped jersey
strive:
	 strive for 
strivey:
	brad i named him strivey.
striving:
	a banner at the top reads "striving boldly into new arenas (and losing interest)"
stroke:
	quentin somebody, help!  i think she's having a stroke!
strokes:
	but instead, a chorus of encouragement from other lunatics strokes his quirk into an obsession that takes over his identity!
stroking:
	john sits at a desk, stroking a cat.  mary stands nearby, looking away.
strongest:
	ross decades of scientific research have gone into making this the strongest, most potent gullible ever.  previously available only to industry professionals, i'm pleased to offer it now in a new, ultra-concentrated form ten times more potent than any gullible you already have.
struggling:
	a chubby man with a walrus moustache comes in to the left of mutton chops and ken, struggling under the weight of an enormous summer sausage.
strumming:
	 and this is by sitting-around-on-clouds-strumming-harps standards
strums:
	now an old man, the fellow strums a harp piningly.  two children look on.
strychnine:
	no children were poisoned by homemade cookies laced with strychnine.
stssstsswss:
	gax whispering to rob pssswsss stssstsswss
stubby:
	second  is it that yappy little mutt from across the street?  dirty brown fur, stubby tail, ignorant expression?
students:
	ellie no matter what i do, i can't seem to stop my students from cheating on tests!
studies:
	xerxes studies the puzzle and clues long and hard.
studliest:
	big head i am the studliest man here tonight.  don't you think?
stumbles:
	stumbles across a(n) { magic diadem, arcane prophecy, dusty tome, crazy old man, alien artifact, enchanted sword, otherworldly portal, dream-inducing drug, encrypted data feed, time-traveling soldier, exiled angel, talking fish
stump:
	laverne's son appears.  his head is missing and blood spurts from the stump.
stung:
	lincoln i rather think i'd prefer to be attacked by some sort of poisoned razor bees to be stung, poisoned, and lacerated to death than to be snuffed by a common poor person.
stunning:
	adelaide  i don't think it's ridiculous.  i think it's truly remarkable.  a stunning wonder of nature.
stupidest:
	 so i got a new idea. i'm planning to die of some super-rare disease -- like, so rare they name it after me. and i'm also gonna eat the stupidest stuff i can find. 
stymy:
	045045;  geo-politics stymy
styrofoam:
	man 1 we pack them in with styrofoam and seal them up with tape for 24 hours.
suavely:
	a man suavely offers a bouquet of flowers to a lady.
subatomic:
	wo  but everything we know is simplified to some degree. even if we're experts down to the atomic level--there's alway the subatomic.
subculture:
	greg let's say there's an expansion bay on my phone.  i can buy third-party modules specific to my needs.  maybe i want a digital tape measure and a level.  maybe i want a micrometer or a magnifier.  sometimes these are things i have to carry with me.  why can't they be on my phone, linked to the processor and the camera and the bluetooth chip?  i could turn my phone into a scanner or a nutritional scale or camera binoculars or fishing radar.  my examples aren't that broad-reaching, but if it's open-source then any tool a sufficiently nerdy subculture can't live without, they'll develop for themselves.  whaddya think?  good idea, huh?
subdivision:
	desmond i'd also like everyone to start wearing feathers - to make new residents feel welcome as the area inevitably gentrifies.  it's time to add some biodiversity to our little subdivision!
subgroup:
	 don't worry it wasn't a ____* baby (*your race, religion, ethnicity or other subgroup)
subhead:
	subhead  "the idea just came to me," says modern-day prometheus
subjective:
	vanity fair. for meerschaum and cigarettes. does not bite the tongue. listen, let's not beat around the bush. you want some primo cigarettes, right? but why - what's the big deal? is it just flavor? that's very subjective. no. you want to look cool. so shut up and grab one of our cigarettes. it's made of bomber-jacket leather. there is nothing cooler in the world. the best. bomber cigs - so good - so bad
subjects:
	 the communist pirates are for the liberal arts subjects and there are erudite dinosaurs for computer science
subjugating:
	josh look, whatever he was trying to do, he ended up subjugating the native peoples and opening the door for european exploitation of the americas!
subjugation:
	ariel misbehavior has become his palette, our apartment his canvas, in a grand, grotesque installation - featuring us as predictable foils, our fury as much a deliberate part of the work as each precisely-browned fiber of shag.  more than a simple befoulment - this is a befoulment of order, a metaphorical poop-smear on the very notion of animal subjugation.
subjunctive:
	 no present subjunctive, though, no "k" on the board.
sublimation:
	 it's sublimation of neural moisture, causing constriction of the blood vessels
submarine:
	bearded man (internal monologue) like when *george* came to visit. they all went to that club that looks like a submarine.
submerged:
	later, craig and wendy sit atop the roof of their mostly-submerged home.  craig has three wool caps on his head, one on his left shoulder and two on his right knee.  wendy is still knitting.
submit:
	- hidden away in this isolated barn, you must submit to my every whim!
subset:
	  reason #485 why it would suck to be a cave i bet babies used to be even more annoying than they are today. all of today's babies are descended from the subset of caveman babies that were not intolerable enough to destroy.
subsidiary:
	man 1 man, i thought dole was a big, happy pineapple-plantation kind of place!  not some corporate subsidiary of the evil frito-lay empire!
substances:
	- how dare you make assumptions about me based on my race! i have no idea how to obtain illegal substances, and i'm offended by the very notion!
subtlety:
	413413;  subtlety is lost
suburb:
	woman touch?. south of paris. suburb.
suburban:
	 note for international readers hot topic is a store found in suburban shopping malls.  they sell a bizarre combination of naughty novelties, goth gear like corsets and boots, and trendy logo shirts with 'clever' sayings and nintendo characters and the emblems of punk rock bands that were big a decade before the average customer was born.  it is the dictionary definition of over-the-counter counterculture.
subversive:
	top hat  but the whole point of detournement, from a strict situationist perspective, is to divert bourgeois cultural elements to new subversive roles! the spectacle's great recuperative powers are hijacked to instead serve as a vehicle for revolutionary communique!
subway:
	 ever step onto the subway on a hot day and get just smacked in the face with a wave of b.o.?  ewwwww.
succeeds:
	451451;  harv finally succeeds
successfully:
	seeing folks who might be future-me is reassuring.  it lets me believe that behind the scenes, things are quietly being arranged for my life to progress successfully.
succession:
	in rapid succession, he thinks to himself
succumbs:
	234234;  a norseman succumbs
sucka:
	man1 free education, sucka!
sucking:
	nelson leaps onto a passerby and starts sucking on the man's head.
suckle:
	 suckle a teat 
suction:
	simon have you ever actually used plaque-vac?  my aunt gave me one for christmas.  the suction motor is really cheap, so you either have to go super slowly and hit a bunch of spots twice, or just brush your teeth the regular way afterwards.  it doesn't really save you any time.
sudafed:
	yuri can i have more sudafed and benadryl and anything else you got
sufficiently:
	greg let's say there's an expansion bay on my phone.  i can buy third-party modules specific to my needs.  maybe i want a digital tape measure and a level.  maybe i want a micrometer or a magnifier.  sometimes these are things i have to carry with me.  why can't they be on my phone, linked to the processor and the camera and the bluetooth chip?  i could turn my phone into a scanner or a nutritional scale or camera binoculars or fishing radar.  my examples aren't that broad-reaching, but if it's open-source then any tool a sufficiently nerdy subculture can't live without, they'll develop for themselves.  whaddya think?  good idea, huh?
suffocate:
	platonic friends?  pluralistic ignorance?  planar geometrics?  planck's constant?  plastic bags that could suffocate children?
sugartits:
	daughter sugartits.
suggest:
	woman we have established a wintergreen napkin palette.  these turquoise pepper mills you found suggest a fundamentally southwestern character.
suggested:
	039039;  indecency is suggested
suggesting:
	hector  are you suggesting i am made of drugs?
suggests:
	right ooh! the sudden electricity in the air suggests to me that your strange vegetable-based euphemisms have taken a turn for the vulgar!
suicide:
	esteban i said it's time to seriously contemplate suicide
sultans:
	 sultans/caliphs
summerbottom:
	lady agnes felicity brunhilde d'summerbottom rather rude of cameron to just not show up.
summoned:
	550550;  salvation is summoned
summons:
	 additionally, my frosted whipped beverage summons lads to my garden
sumo:
	a japanese father sits before a quartet of sumo wrestlers.  a son, dressed in traditional japanese robes, approaches.
sunbeam:
	 on warm, bright days, were-cat mysteriously transforms into sleepy sunbeam cat
sunburst:
	closer still, now with a sunburst behind his head.
sundries:
	the latest goods that you cannot exist without  "take it apart" tinkerbox parts - tools shiny sundries designed to rapidly expend your working capital.  best prices of the season/enclose cash with order
sunglass:
	 don't you wish you had a sunglass monocle?
sunk:
	 a ton of sunk costs have gone into this food. you can't just toss it! that's sociopathic. that's nero, fiddling while rome burns. the food version.
sunroom:
	joanne upstairs, i'm turning the second bedroom into a fully skylit sunroom complete with floor-to-ceiling windows and a solar-heated lap pool?
sunset:
	his job done, mike flies off into the sunset.
superdorkasaurus:
	 in their defense, he really is a superdorkasaurus.
superfluous:
	julio ...and another thing!  i hate how mary always nags me me to wax my head before church!  i'm all like, 'sweetie.  wax is expensive.  it's a recession."  and she's just all 'it's church.' / she just wants those ladies to see we can afford superfluous stuff like head-wax.  but we cannot.
superheat:
	mack  once lightning hits our rod, the charge will travel down the copper gutters, superheat the doorknob assembly, and momentarily soften the deadbolt enough for me to batter the door open.
superhero:
	caption  the adventures of the superhero whose left ear is bulletproof
superhighway:
	775775; the information superhighway &c.
superhuman:
	glenn  look!  if you kill a dentist, george will bless your womb with a superhuman baby immune to all known diseases!  why does nobody get this?
superlice:
	woman 2 he must got the superlice that need the double-strength enchanterings.
supermodels:
	chester i sweep up poop all day long!  you measure supermodels for underwear!
superstar:
	terry faithfully-recreated goals.  realistic dreams.  comes with a full set of aspirations, that, as the puppeteer, you can fulfill or crush at your discretion.  "i wanted to be an ice-cream flavor tester!"  "not even a superstar!  just a solid 9-to-5 at dreyer's that pays the bills."
superstitious:
	 circleology is like a more superstitious version of circleonomy.
supervisory:
	man continues lurking in a supervisory fashion
supper:
	he went for a walk before supper and hasn't returned.
supplements:
	victor but then the fist takes some supplements or something and it starts squeezing harder and harder and you realize that the situation is getting worse not better and at this rate it looks like it really might keep getting worse without ever recovering, i mean it passes that point
supporter:
	a woman is shown wearing a corset. dr. warner's health corset, with skirt supporter and self-adjusting pads, is on sale now. only one available - this is dr. warner's actual personal item. it took a while but i finally gained her trust. her loss is your bargain! smells like doctor. 351 broadway, n.y.
supportively:
	man continues to lurk behind laundress while supportively conversing about her work
supports:
	woman ...as you can see, the data clearly supports the conclusion.
supposably:
	dinah  between all the ones you could of got, supposably that one's the most unique.
suppressing:
	is the phenomenon just under-reported?  are rich people suppressing the news of their own misfortune?
supra:
	- eight-thirty it is! i'll pick you up in my supra.
supreme:
	 we've got to get through the supreme court sex scandal, then bee flu, then asteroids-for-lasers.
surf:
	a woman is walking in the surf by the ocean.  the wind is blowing and she is looking pensively off-panel.
surface:
	count twiggy when the moon hangs full...when its cratered surface spews maddening light upon the midnight land below...this becomes a cat!
surgeons:
	- probably not very many, considering that we're at an orthopaedic surgery convention, and everyone here are themselves orthopaedic surgeons.
surmised:
	 as you may have surmised, the bald fellow is referring to hair available for donation from his back and the tops of his feet
surprises:
	husband more to the point, why are there always these surprises waiting for me in the check ledger?
surrender:
	fat  george bush should call a press conference.  "the bombs are already in the air.  you have 15 seconds to surrender."
surrounded:
	a soldier and an ogre are surrounded by clowns.
surrounding:
	 david malki ! is not an easy man to know. he's like ... like a row which has been filled completely save for a 3 and a 7, but there is not enough information in the surrounding grid to determine which digit should go  box, a delicate state  a single misstep could lead to further erroneous assumptions, compounding upon itself until the entire puzzle is rendered unsalvageable. sometimes i suspect he doesn't even *like* sudoku.
survivor:
	jen i'm not really a 9/11 hero.  i wasn't a survivor of the attack.
sushi:
	son i get to stand at the sushi counter in the grocery store to add authenticity while the mexicans in the back make the food.
suspected:
	103103;  fraud is suspected
suspenders:
	ray's understudy is a duck.  wearing shoes, pants held up with suspenders and a top hat.  let's call him desmond, for the alliteration.
suspicion:
	658658;  suspicion is aroused
sustenance:
	 i will drink deeply of your lifeblood. for this is my sustenance.
swap:
	 swap for 
swappable:
	inventor four independently-actuated ground-contacting sub-shoes. brushless gear assembly with hot-swappable drive bearings. double camshaft connected to a fully magnetic differential.
swaths:
	dora last semester i had a student devise an elaborate scheme where he reduced vast swaths of the textbook into a shorthand notation that he printed onto his hands with ultraviolet ink... ...then he put a tiny l.e.d. blacklight in the bridge of his glasses.  much harder than simply studying, of course.
sweater:
	molly well, put on a sweater.
sweatin:
	it was a b-side on their single "labor day, and i'm a-sweatin'" which reached about #8 on the local charts.
sweaty:
	thelma  a hint of sweaty fear.  were you nervous about inviting me over?
sweeper:
	sweeper  who are you talking to?
sweeping:
	jamaal  come on!  the heroism!  the sweeping vistas!  the unironic presentation of cut-and-dried morality!
sweeps:
	vince dramatically sweeps the curtains aside and strikes a dramatic pose, wrench in hand, as loretta regards him, a bemused expression on her face.
sweetened:
	helene ha ha!  oh no, sir.  it's lightly sweetened with distilled agave nectar, so its great for your diet and your sweet tooth!
sweethearts:
	sergeant  the lads are holding up, but i know they're a bit scared.  these are just boys, sir.  they miss their parents, their sweethearts.  home.
sweetly:
	a mother and her moppet are chatting.  mother is resting in a chaise chair, while moppet is standing beside, sweetly, hands on the armrest.
swelling:
	 he'd gotten halfway to the market before the swelling started up again.  'well,' he thought to himself, 'let's see if i can still pull this off.'  he couldn't -- either the plan, or, later at home, his pants.
swept:
	 i felt a chill as the ghost swept through me to alight on the distributor cap.  "there is corrosion," it hissed in a voice blasted for centuries by the immortal furnaces of hades, "on the spark plug wire contacts."
swerved:
	keith billy swerved to avoid hitting a coyote and ran the chevelle off the road.  great plumes of dust, lit red by the setting sun.  we never saw the hill.  we never saw the cliff.
swiftly:
	newspaper text such are the benefits afforded us all by the unending march of progress, that each new dawn finds many a person safe, fed, clothed and sheltered. a citizen of our modern era rarely finds him- or herself in a deadly battle for survival, as was common for the first generations of mankind. thus do our bodies, evolved for and hardened by constant struggle, often find themselves idle; and without some constant whetting, thus swiftly begins the degenerative process of death.
swings:
	an airship swings wildly from its gas bag.
swiped:
	otto so, earlier, when i swiped my debit card in the cab, i transferred to the driver part of henry ford's profit from the sale of the first model t.  later, i bought a bag of fun-size snickers with the same dollar thomas jefferson used to buy point-oh-seven square miles of louisiana!
swiss:
	"unless ten billion dollars is deposited into the following swiss bank account."  i don't know, it's sort of cold.
switch:
	- throw the switch.
switchbacks:
	 picture his hands, just off-panel, vigorously driving an imaginary race car through all manner of treacherous turns and switchbacks.  now read the second panel again.
switched:
	5. i used to be a vegetarian for moral reasons, but ever since a cow kicked my baby brother in the head i've switched to an all-beef diet.  those jerks deserve it.
switching:
	you do not talk too loud about switching your career focus!
swollen:
	chris' eyes bulge as his head is forced back painfully far.  his jaw is practically unhinged and his throat is swollen grotesquely.  a mass protrudes from his mouth, and atop the mass is a banner reading thanks.
swooning:
	a man comforts a swooning woman
swords:
	jimbo please!  help!  barbarians have attacked our village!  our sons have been lost to their swords, our daughters to their lusts...
sworn:
	  ma'am, as a duly sworn butt inspector i cannot let any slight within my purview go unrectified.
swum:
	132132;  sharks are swum with
symptoms:
	doctor everyone agrees that you have no sign of any tumor whatsoever. you seen to have zero symptoms. again.
synaptic:
	phil no, i was safe and sound in my own bed.  a synaptic construct that resembled me may have been in your dream last night.
synonymous:
	malki ! our scientists and technicians toil 'round the clock, honing the anachronisms and incongruities that have become synonymous with "wondermark."
synthesize:
	hatted toff they speak sounds that enter your ears but bypass your mind like the wrong exit on an empty highway. they speak thoughts that never synthesize into words. they speak impressions.
syrup:
	eight-dollar hot dogs.  twenty-dollar cheese fries.  ten-buck gallons of soda made from four cents' worth of syrup.  shameless!
tab:
	sam  ready for your tab?
tabbies:
	 according to the topline, tabbies age 3-6 love the pawns -- but we still can't get any quadrant on those calicos
taboo:
	 why is there no culturally acceptable way to say "you gonna finish that spaghetti?" why is it such a taboo to be concerned about wasting food?
tabulating:
	clarence christmas these days is only sacred to accountants tabulating retail sales figures.  can't we set aside our selfish urges just for one day, and concentrate on the true, spiritually meaningful roots of the holiday season?
tac:
	algernon  tic-tac...
tacit:
	vince i don't know, it seems to me that any pun or permutation of the 'girls gone wild' concept would just be inherently in poor taste, especially at marketing directed at children.  also, it sends the tacit message that 'girls gone wild' is a normal and acceptable part of our culture - when in fact it's seedy trash that thrives on the most crass and debased elements of human nature.
taco:
	rascal 1 yeah, dude, i have no idea where that taco bell is.
tacs:
	alt text fine. wintergreen? how about custom packages of tic tacs? folks can rattle them when they want us to kiss! --jason are you trying to give me a migraine
tactic:
	no mention of honesty or charity.  morality is simply a tactic to avoid santa's wrath!
tactics:
	paul i'm tired of network news scare tactics.   i don't want spin or rumors or corporate b. s.  can you just tell me in plain terms?   what.  should.  i.  eat.
taft:
	 taft was a well-known yukster but jimmy here would cause the most awkward of silences at all the state dinners
tagged:
	493493;  lindsay is tagged in a note
tagline:
	jack and on one billboard we'll show all the princesses with the tagline 'girls gone medieval'!
tah:
	- dih yuh sah tryyih tah cahstahpay?
takest:
	their office manager thou may takest for thy spoils.
takin:
	reg  i can't compete with you folks!  weirdest thing that ever happened to me down at the factory was a guy ratted me out for pocketing misformed o-rings off the line an' takin' 'em home for "illicit purposes."
talkin:
	joe it's very rude talkin' about someone who ain't part of the conversation!
taller:
	the man looks suspicious. the salesman's head grows even larger - it is now perhaps 1.5x taller than the man's. he looks very angry and his mouth grows into a huge, gaping frown - he could easily swallow the other man's head.
tally:
	 i suppose it would just be depressing to keep a tally of how often this happens to me
tallying:
	 so tallying up all the conjugations, that's eighty-seven points.
tampering:
	king the bylaws of our experimental agrarian city-state expressly prohibit mischievous tampering with the natural order of living things!
tan:
	liz sometime when we get skin for tan into leather, there is a strip of fat on this  we make this a soup but only while you wait for shoe repair
tanzania:
	do you own tea estates in kenya and tanzania?  do you invest millions every year in tea research?  do you attract tea experts from around the world to work for you?
tappity:
	<<tap tappity tap tap>>
target:
	leader i want to see some outside-the-box ideas here, okay? target western devils.  brainstorm.  mahmoud go.
tarts:
	drew running late.  wake up late, you're late for work.  kids late for school.  you don't have time.  busy schedule, you grab a junk-food breakfast.  pop tarts, drive-thru, donuts.  sorta montage between 'em.
tease:
	- stop teasing me. it's not nice when you tease.
teasing:
	- stop teasing me. it's not nice when you tease.
teatime:
	westmoreland  wicked.  carter, bust out the gatling guns.  i want to be revered as a god by teatime.
technical:
	voicemail your call is very important to us.  please listen carefully, as our menu options have recently changed.  for billing, press one.  for sales, press two.  for technical support, press pi.
technician:
	a technician in a lab coat is sitting at a computer workstation.
technicians:
	malki ! our scientists and technicians toil 'round the clock, honing the anachronisms and incongruities that have become synonymous with "wondermark."
techniques:
	 if i were on a desert island with a unicycle i bet within six weeks i would be inventin' all sorts of mad new techniques
teflon:
	marc which seemingly harmless substance that we use every day is actually slowly poisoning us?  lead.  asbestos.  teflon.  thalomide.  vioxx.  makes you wonder what's next.  what they haven't figured out is deadly yet.  so i'm just playing it safe.
telecom:
	- hello, may i speak to primary telecom decision maker in the house?
telegrameutophium:
	newscaster walt hoppendorf's melodious voice comes over the telegrameutophium.
telegrams:
	 at&t stands for american telephone and telegraph.  because telegrams are such an important part of our communications infrastructure
telegraph:
	 at&t stands for american telephone and telegraph.  because telegrams are such an important part of our communications infrastructure
telehat:
	vitus (showing off his new telehat) so call him back.
telepathically:
	caption  but ben and angie are still linked telepathically
telepathy:
	071071;  telepathy is attempted
teleport:
	ted oh, no, i have one!  it's just...at some point this morning, he turned into a dinosaur, and then he started taunting me.  i can't catch him.   he seems to be able to teleport.
teleportation:
	time travel? quantum therory! teleportation? quantum therory! microwave burritos? quantum therory!
temperament:
	 the strawberry has an artistic temperament.
temperature:
	man 1 they're creating a new scale to measure temperature that takes into account human misery.
tempered:
	590590;  excitement is tempered
templed:
	  anna wintour templed her perfect fingers.  'now,' she hissed, 'we wait.'
temporary:
	  we put temporary authorization on your credit card in case camel comes back drowned
tendency:
	 i guess this would explain my increased tendency to shout at the television
tendon:
	older  have you ever been, say, eating a piece of chicken, and you feel your tooth scrape against the bone or you hear a tendon snapping a certain way...
tendons:
	if the sparse hair on each digit stiffened and elongated into whiskers, and those rigid tendons on my feet became long, whipping tails, possessed of an independent dark energy?
tennis:
	john and doesn't having fielders convey a lack of confidence in the pitcher?  "we really don't think you can throw a no-hitter, so we put eight other guys out there to clean up your messes."  "don't try hard or anything."  oh and hey, what if the pitcher started using a tennis ball?  just like whipped it out?  you think anyone'd notice?
tentacled:
	he is attacked by a grotesque, tentacled sea creature.
tenting:
	 i can tell by the tenting
terminated:
	employer i'm sorry that it's come to this, but frankly, you've left me no choice. there are really only two options for you you can offer your resignation, effective immediately -- or you will be terminated with cause. 
terrace:
	 go close to the eanna temple, the residence of ishtar, such as no later king or man equaled!  go up the wall of uruk and walk around, examine its foundation, inspect its brickwork thoroughly.  go 0.8 miles on broadview terrace, then bear slight right turn and turn onto california avenue, for your destination will be on the right.
terraformed:
	in a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, vr-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | america, japan, soviet russia, victorian britain, medieval europe, aztec empire, atlantis, terraformed mars, antarctica, one-way spaceflight, outer rim world, set from road warrior,
terrance:
	terrance  why are you always mumbling?
terrorize:
	man 1 vicious creatures. one less of 'em to terrorize children.
terrorizing:
	 theodore roosevelt is terrorizing a factory.
testament:
	caption if god of the old testament ran a fortune 500 company
tester:
	terry faithfully-recreated goals.  realistic dreams.  comes with a full set of aspirations, that, as the puppeteer, you can fulfill or crush at your discretion.  "i wanted to be an ice-cream flavor tester!"  "not even a superstar!  just a solid 9-to-5 at dreyer's that pays the bills."
testicle:
	- so, as gently as i can think to say it, i say "when you say you felt a lump... was it the testicle itself you were feeling?"
testicles:
	close-up of suitcase.  it now bears an enormous sticker with a biohazard symbol and the words testicles for transplant.
tests:
	ellie no matter what i do, i can't seem to stop my students from cheating on tests!
texas:
	wouldn't you know it, a friend of his in texas had this one for sale, and i was able to get it overnighted.  i hope it's a good one!
textbooks:
	ape  as a scholar of your language, customs and technology, i have learned enough in three days to fill dozens of textbooks back home.
texted:
	herb  james just texted to say he has to work late.
texting:
	i don't want him becoming some texting-crazed exhibitionist facebook-urchin with a narcissistic sense of entitlement!
teydstay:
	woman 2 ayplej ahleejanz tooda flahg uvdaa yooneye teydstay tsava merraka
thalomide:
	marc which seemingly harmless substance that we use every day is actually slowly poisoning us?  lead.  asbestos.  teflon.  thalomide.  vioxx.  makes you wonder what's next.  what they haven't figured out is deadly yet.  so i'm just playing it safe.
thankful:
	also, surprise!  everyone's thankful for blessings.
thankfully:
	bearded  thankfully it's masked by all the vodka. 
thanking:
	glen as a way of thanking me for helping me out, i'd like to buy out your book stand and allow you to retire.
thatched:
	three men sit around a folding table in the middle of a village of thatched huts.
thaw:
	when are we supposed to thaw great-grandpa?
thawing:
	does that mean we'll be thawing him soon?
theater:
	the panel zooms out to reveal several people sitting in a theater, of which two women are the focus, watching the previous scenes from a movie or play.  cynthia is seen burning people in the background.
theatre:
	animal comedy theatre presents langston, the tortoise with severe time-management issues, in "a fine spring day
thee:
	 ask not for whom the mortality tuba blaats -- it blaats for thee
theh:
	- sah hah bahd ihssit, theh, dahc?
thelinda:
	thelinda  oh, but he always comes back with such stories!
theme:
	octavio this guy in norway's been doing that since eisenhower.  and he has a theme song.
themmmm:
	 you're one of themmmm
theodore:
	 theodore roosevelt is terrorizing a factory.
theories:
	mr. mikey children!  all of these theories are true in their own way.  now, who wants a policy?  last chance before the tea kicks in.
thicker:
	ron do you think everyone has the same number of hair follicles?  on the face of it, you'd think of course not.  some people are way hairier than others.  but are they?  or is their hair just thicker and coarser?  even bald people have hair follicles, it's just that fewer of them are active.  i mean, why wouldn't we all have the same number of follicles?  we have the same number of fingers.  i know, i know - some people don't have the same number of fingers.  but that's abnormal.  but - jeez, maybe there's a high rate of abnormality with hair, too.   with so many follicles, the chances of minor mutation during development are very high.  meaning, even if there were some theoretical "ideal" number of follicles, chances are slim that anybody would match that number.  so if there were an ideal number, would we even know?
thief:
	  writing to the president of inventions is like writing to santa claus, except that the president of inventions is a notorious intellectual-property thief and santa claus is imaginary.
thievery:
	681681; ill-thought-out melon-thievery
thigh:
	sig i have globular thigh disorder!  it's a very rare condition that renders my thighs the exact shape of watermelons!  it's miserable to live with!
thinner:
	 oh, that's easy.  see, the paint thinner was just making things worse.
thirdhand:
	evan  listen, if we have a problem tell me to my face!  i don't want to hear about it thirdhand!
thirst:
	 i shall tap your artery and slake my eternal thirst. then no longer will you walk among the living.
thirteen:
	mr. kabob i'm a thirteen-dollar, rubbery-tasting kabob representing the captive-audience retail dining industry!
thomas:
	otto so, earlier, when i swiped my debit card in the cab, i transferred to the driver part of henry ford's profit from the sale of the first model t.  later, i bought a bag of fun-size snickers with the same dollar thomas jefferson used to buy point-oh-seven square miles of louisiana!
thorax:
	closeup the tape reads ...almost burst out laughing.  her thorax looked so fat.  she cannot get away with wearing that..at her si...
thoughtfully:
	millionaire examines the strip thoughtfully.
thousands:
	man 1 boxing day in canada is a tradition dating back for thousands of years.
thrash:
	dr. monroe if i fail, i will pass a moment in quiet reflection.  if you fail, i will thrash your bones the like of which you have never felt!
thrashed:
	jeanne the one where you thrashed around making
thrashing:
	father in this house, questioning my daughter's honor gets you a thorough thrashing!
threadless:
	 so what's this threadless thing?
threaten:
	sam  don't you dare threaten me
threatened:
	023023;  a child is threatened
threatening:
	old ant what with your absurd musical taste, generically rebellious nature, and unfamiliar/threatening media-consumption habits 
threesies:
	carlos on mexico, creatures are segregated by horn quality into inviolable casts that annually rotate civic duties,  right now twosies are the lawyers, threesies the bakers, and ninesies like us are the astronauts.
threshold:
	reginald yeah, but only for half the day.  it's still got a few hours before it hits the "dirty" threshold.
thrice:
	foster  will you knead her gums thrice daily?
thrilling:
	the most thrilling of all known pursuits!
thrived:
	over the millennia, your family thrived on this food.  your tribe and your clan adapted to it.
thrives:
	vince i don't know, it seems to me that any pun or permutation of the 'girls gone wild' concept would just be inherently in poor taste, especially at marketing directed at children.  also, it sends the tacit message that 'girls gone wild' is a normal and acceptable part of our culture - when in fact it's seedy trash that thrives on the most crass and debased elements of human nature.
throne:
	hap it looks like the flesh of my chest is ripped back and inside my body there is a tiny dinosaur working a series of levers to control me  down one arm there's an army of manatees mounting to stage a coup and take control of the me-throne  down the other arm is the rival army of dinosaurs but they are actually being driven by butterflies in hive-mind mode  climbing up my back there's like a silhouette of myself but it's as if i'm climbing the mountain of me to get my soul back from the dinosaur in my ribcage  and i'm being chased by this fast-growing fungus that is turning my body to mushrooms as it creeps up from my crack
thru:
	drew running late.  wake up late, you're late for work.  kids late for school.  you don't have time.  busy schedule, you grab a junk-food breakfast.  pop tarts, drive-thru, donuts.  sorta montage between 'em.
thuggish:
	 seriously who even goes into dark alleys unless you are a thuggish type bent on mayhem
thundercats:
	but what if the thundercats fan-fiction newsletter doesn't feel the same way?
thusly:
	this is zion, o simpleton.  thusly have i christened my sanctuary, my ascetic outpost, which secludes me from all worldly cares.
thwack:
	 thwack
thy:
	their office manager thou may takest for thy spoils.
tianenmen:
	 tooth magazine folded in '89 when advertisers withdrew their support following the publishing of a controversial illustration featuring c. everett koop driving a bulldozer through tianenmen square. the caption 'fluoride uber alles'
tick:
	sick  this, i realized, is what immortality must be like staring at the clock, waiting for it to tick over, waiting for time to pass and for the sun to rise and things to get better... but it doesn't. and it doesn't. and it doesn't.
tickertape:
	george watches another device spit out a tickertape.
tickin:
	wanda saving time...saving time...time's a-wasting.  don't waste time.  time flies.  don't let time fly away, use the plaque-vac every day.  time keeps on tickin'.  time is a girl's best friend.  all we need is time.  without time, nothing else matters.  save time, save a life.  save your own life.
tickled:
	woman in chair tickled. and/or snuggled
tidbit:
	tara sweetie, i know you're still young, but i'll let you in on a secret.  this is a tidbit they whisper in your ear when you finally become a grown-up.  the only reason anybody says anything on the internet is to draw attention to themselves.
ties:
	a young man and an older man, both dressed in suits, ties, and vests, are riding what appears to be a large-wheeled side-by-side tandem device
tightest:
	tara i've got to punch these new robots until they blow up. / bring me my tightest clothes.
tiki:
	two scientists stand with a tribesman in a grass skirt and tiki mask.
tiller:
	- no sir, this is a steering wheel, or what we call a "tiller."
timely:
	 pretend that dude in the last panel is st. patrick and this comic becomes much more timely
tina:
	tina (to herself)  bluh, i always get stared at in this dress.
tiniest:
	760760; the tiniest alt-comic
tink:
	apparatchik komrade kringle! perheps i tink ve should do more of de party fundraising and less of de party line, da?
tinkerbox:
	the latest goods that you cannot exist without  "take it apart" tinkerbox parts - tools shiny sundries designed to rapidly expend your working capital.  best prices of the season/enclose cash with order
tinkerer:
	another banner states "wondermark's" "nominally-essential" "tinkerer's handbook" "the magazine for people who cannot leave well enough alone". a woman is shown operating some sort of water pump.
tinkering:
	hermes  should i applaud your aimless tinkering?  what problem did you solve?
tipped:
	- was it the crotch-sniffing that tipped you off?
tis:
	 'tis the season!
tisferol:
	womans 2 inda vizabul witlibberdey annjus tisferol
tissue:
	- any chance the needle might get stuck in the soft tissue of my throat?
titillated:
	alttext before i was just confused -- but now i'm titillated and confused!
tittering:
	 the color guard is nervously tittering.  the brass band has fainted from exertion.  the mayor is beginning to check his pocketwatch and fidget with his sash.
toasters:
	coal in the home. the family in question had attached turbine-boilers to every device in the home toasters, refrigerators, can-openers &c. what reports fail to mention is that the lady of the house works in a factory where the small boilers are manufactured. she acquires them at a steep discount. this is clearly out of range for the average family.
toenails:
	 if my toenails became little tiny buck teeth, and the wrinkled skin on each knuckle twisted to become a series of sinister little pointed faces?
togs:
	a gentleman in riding togs holds a large metal can at arm's length
toiletries:
	caption toiletries merchants
toilets:
	gax  i bleached my sheets every morning, re-alkalinized the toilets after i used them, replaced any pets i ate...
toin:
	 as your attorney i must advise you toin the future obtain signed releases prior to any further episodes of forkery
toity:
	first  the place is supposed to be toity, so i go for the salisbury steak, figure why not.
tolerable:
	 conversely, everyone quieter than you may actually be tolerable to be around
tolerant:
	bernice keep on walkin', stranger.  we're tolerant of everyone 'round here - 'cept for your kind.
tolerate:
	- that's it! i'll tolerate your lively piping no longer!
tollbooth:
	paramour because everybody knows janey. tollbooth jane, we call her. it's no secret.
tomboyish:
	with the help of a { sarcastic female techno-geek, tomboyish female mechanic, shape-shifting female assassin, leather-clad female in shades, girl who's always loved him, bookish female scholar with mousy brown hair, cherubic girl with pigtails and spunk, female who inexplicably becomes attracted to the damaged protagonist for unstated reasons
tombstone:
	a man and woman are crouched in front of a tombstone
tomcat:
	a girl addresses her demure lady cat while a wild tomcat looks on.
tome:
	stumbles across a(n) { magic diadem, arcane prophecy, dusty tome, crazy old man, alien artifact, enchanted sword, otherworldly portal, dream-inducing drug, encrypted data feed, time-traveling soldier, exiled angel, talking fish
ton:
	 a ton of sunk costs have gone into this food. you can't just toss it! that's sociopathic. that's nero, fiddling while rome burns. the food version.
tones:
	a legionnaire speaks in hushed tones with a tiny triceratops, perched on his bayonet.  in the background, a battle rages.
tongues:
	 raspy tongues at 
tooda:
	woman 2 ayplej ahleejanz tooda flahg uvdaa yooneye teydstay tsava merraka
toolshed:
	 once you grow up, you have to just sit around all day figuring out how your children are trying to decieve you.  if you let your guard down even for a moment, all of a sudden they are seventeen years old breaking the lock on your toolshed and selling your power tools for meth money.
toothpicks:
	sidney  it's prob'ly something senile.  like toothpicks.  or clams.
topics:
	woman it had -pathos- and -humor- and surprising -depth- and it was even about -all- the topics that i -love-
topless:
	...which, viewed at arm's length, form an image of a topless woman in a classical pose.
topline:
	 according to the topline, tabbies age 3-6 love the pawns -- but we still can't get any quadrant on those calicos
topple:
	 trenton! don't forget to make an entry in your idiot log! we'll be going over the week's records once we get to nana's and it doesn't take much disappointment to topple the poor woman's carefully-balanced decades of regret
tormenting:
	- i think... geez, this is tough. ...i think a spirit is tormenting me. a ghost.
torsion:
	 i.t. stands for intestinal torsion
tortoises:
	roderick, astride his mighty team of tortoises, is in hot pursuit of dwight, who is riding a tortoise of his own.
tortured:
	hole we are bathing in the bile of tortured souls.  it is our only respite from the constant, searing torment of the knowledge that love has abandoned us.
torturous:
	patient i swear, nobody else has ever felt like i do. i'm a middle-class white guy stuck in an existential crisis, doc. you don't know how torturous it is to be me!
torx:
	hermes  let me guess.  you bought an angle vise and some torx screws and a twenty-piece dremel kit.
toshi:
	toshi me too.   i read it over the weekend.
tossed:
	 he barely tossed a ninety even with the bumpers in
tosser:
	closeup of gus' mustache.  up close we can see it spells out you're quite the tosser.
totaled:
	 feelings were hurt.  marriages were ruined.  at least one car was totaled.  and now finally we can do this right.
touchup:
	we see that he has simply painted over the tag, and "poop" is just as visible in gregg's touchup work.
touchy:
	lucinda  the guy in my office is real "touchy" too.
tourette:
	spectator tourette's?
touring:
	a large touring car is parked so that it takes up two spaces at the curb.
tourists:
	scrib b huh; malki's not even home / scrib a holy sheba will you look at this / wondermark character oh, great.  tourists.
tovah:
	shana tovah!
towel:
	 he had also wrapped himself in a bath towel but that had somehow fallen into the toilet and clogged it.  oh i'm sorry am i disgusting you with tales of your grandfather's toilet misadventure, children??
towels:
	leonard we use handkerchiefs now, instead of kleenex.  and washable cotton rags instead of paper towels.
towering:
	the city is in flames.  people are leaping from windows and rioting in the streets.  fire brigades try desperately to control the flames, and in the middle of it all, towering over the burning buildings and tiny people, stands the enormous, stovepipe-hatted figure of abraham lincoln.
towers:
	back home, herman has to crouch down low just to fit inside the living room.  he towers over his sad-looking wife/girlfriend/partner.
townhouse:
	i liked that townhouse better.  bottled water and free fridge calendars.
tows:
	riding a bird, rick flies towards elspeth.  he tows a huge banner on which is written will you mar--
trace:
	 supposedly the cucumber is the only food that contains every necessary nutrient, albeit in trace amounts for some. so if you're going to restrict yourself to a single food, twenty pounds of cucumbers is a reasonably smart choice.
traces:
	traces of...expired margarine.  wet animal.  misery.
trachea:
	you're crushing my trachea!
tract:
	barbara fiction is the creation of falsehoods for the delusion of children.  this james is half a man, he's written' some useful tract on a better way to plow a field or such
trademark:
	- i guess make sure you show off my beard, it's my trademark...
trader:
	596596; stanley the trader
trail:
	616616; the trail goes cold
trainers:
	will you hire only the best equestrian-pilates trainers?  and will you do the exercises with her so she doesn't get self-conscious?  despite the fact that they are designed for a horse's body, not a man's?
trainload:
	walt breaking news.  tragedy strikes eastern europe as a trainload of irradiated hamsters derails in the former soviet republic of georgia.
trains:
	bearded  every detail is authentic. the trains keep accurate schedules. the "staff" wear authentic uniforms. i even bought an actual uniform on ebay for the fabric!
trait:
	  i'm always afraid that i'm lacking some fundamental human trait that everyone else has but always just thinks is too obvious to ever talk about.
traitor:
	 apparently, tusky mcmammoth is a traitor.
traitorous:
	soldier  shut your traitorous face mcmammoth
tramp:
	martha ...since you left me for that tramp standing behind you! / howie right, of course!  the one that i like better than you.
trans:
	  for example, everyone "knows" that smoking is bad.  so when you try to explain that yes, smoking is largely bad--but it's also highly effective, in infants, at warding off murderous trans-dimensional bellybutton gnomes...
transaction:
	070070;  a transaction fails to occur
transactional:
	otto not in a transactional sense, but in a moral sense.  [he hands hilda a slip of paper]  thank you, here's your receipt.
transcript:
	harold marsha, read back the transcript.
transferred:
	otto so, earlier, when i swiped my debit card in the cab, i transferred to the driver part of henry ford's profit from the sale of the first model t.  later, i bought a bag of fun-size snickers with the same dollar thomas jefferson used to buy point-oh-seven square miles of louisiana!
transfers:
	 there are no peaceful transfers of power within the free market
transformed:
	tiger  because i was transformed!  by the wizard!  i told you!
transforms:
	 on warm, bright days, were-cat mysteriously transforms into sleepy sunbeam cat
transfusion:
	 on the bright side, the blood transfusion i got was made up of atoms that were probably once alexander the great!
transgender:
	- i'm taking medical advice from someone who wasn't even born until my voice was changing!  he was still in diapers when i had my transgender surgery!
transgressions:
	i know i've been a grumpy grammar gus in the past, but i recently realized that the correction is often more annoying than the transgressions.
transit:
	 we did stock the cruiser with extra matter to account for energy spent in transit, but there are only so many cows you can cram into a spaceship
translator:
	reginald i put lyrics from pop songs through an internet translator, and now you have to guess what they are.
transmute:
	 put your hand over your heart -- so that the words may transmute your very blood to parasiticide
transplant:
	close-up of suitcase.  it now bears an enormous sticker with a biohazard symbol and the words testicles for transplant.
transport:
	sales ...then french kiss this duck and poof! you transport to your destination!
transported:
	older  and for an instant, you're transported back to a different time, a more feral time, when man hunted his food and life was short...
transporting:
	black  i know recrimination doesn't solve matters, but i'm finding it very hard not to blame you for everything. uprooting whole cultures, transporting them across the globe, dehumanizing an entire race.
trapdoor:
	 it's a little-known fact that pirates were actually very good listeners and always obeyed grown-ups.  (hang a left at the trapdoor)
trappers:
	 the legends come down to us in yellowed fur-trappers'  journals...in shaky rough-hewn script, scrawled by fading candlelight, a single penciled word 'awesome.'
traumatic:
	calvin  here's an example.  joe-blow weirdo had a traumatic childhood.  saw too many "leprechaun" movies in strange contexts and now he's got a mild fetish for dwarves in horror makeup.
traverse:
	that sandwich will traverse about 20 feet of intestines over the next few hours!
tray:
	two aliens with long spiky feathers crowning their bird-style feathered heads address a middle-aged woman with her hair pulled back severely, dressed in a long-sleeved dark dress with an apron.  she is holding a round serving tray in her right hand, angled against her body, and has her left arm akimbo. she responds to them in a matter-of-fact yet kindly manner.
treacherous:
	 picture his hands, just off-panel, vigorously driving an imaginary race car through all manner of treacherous turns and switchbacks.  now read the second panel again.
treachery:
	robot shaver.  children and animals are not allowed in most robot competitions.  hide your treachery with this shaver - removes hair and imparts a waxy, metallic sheen.  $2.00
treason:
	- let's see, what did the charge end up being... three counts of aggravated dental sodomy and conspiracy to commit buggery. also, one count of treason. i was young and stupid.
treasure:
	576576;  treasure is safe
treasures:
	 treasures of antiquity
treats:
	this year, like every other year, all the treats consumed were safe.
trebuchets:
	sheldon are we still doing this?  seriously?  this stereotype is still clinging to life?  first, the "nerds are all frustrated virgins" thing.  some of the nerdiest people i know are highly sexual women.  and millions of nerds have spouses twice as nerdy as they are.  and the mom's basement thing?  the nerds i know live in geodesic domes or multi-story treehouses or, at the very least, condos with garages big enough to hold their trebuchets.
trees:
	a pastoral field, dotted with trees. the weather is clear and springy.
tremblingly:
	geno your fingers are like sponges.  so weak.  so terribly, achingly, tremblingly weak.
tremendous:
	tremendous.
tremendously:
	 it's tremendously complex and adaptive. it's never the same game twice!
tremors:
	duckworth (duck shadow)  steady, isabella.  the tremors in your voice are natural.  for ours is a love that dares not squawk its name!
trench:
	 pfc. pierce heroically hid in a trench while his legs were located by members of the 1st infantry
trend:
	 buck the trend 
trespassers:
	carlos our nations are kept distinct by means of impassable canyons, policed by savage animals who devour trespassers.
triangle:
	what's with the triangle things?
tribe:
	over the millennia, your family thrived on this food.  your tribe and your clan adapted to it.
tribesman:
	two scientists stand with a tribesman in a grass skirt and tiki mask.
tricking:
	davy you cannot tricking me!  my strong desire for this pockets is matter of many public records!
trickles:
	ralph watches him fly off and a single tear trickles down his cheek.
tricky:
	 genetic inheritance! a tricky subject! the transmission disequillibrium test is one way to measure the over-transmission of an allele from heterozygous parents to affected offspring!
tricycle:
	waiter  let's see...rusty tricycle, uncleburglar, steelhouse stiltwalker, boogerbrau, prancing minotaur, dunderschnauzen, chairfarter stout, and aardshark.
trifled:
	- hear me world! look to the skies to find your ruler! i will not be trifled with!
trillions:
	karl so the first draw - when the tube seems "full" - requires 0.0001 units of squeezing force.  the second, 0.0002 units, etc.  it's easy at first, but that doubling gets serious after a while.  eventually it takes trillions of units of force!  quadrillions!
trim:
	 he had been to a machine that predicted his death.  receiving 'scale,' he kept himself trim and avoided shipyards and truckstops.  and then, when maurice entered the room with his large eel, his blood froze.
trimmed:
	three women; the woman on the left wears a black hood trimmed with fur and carries a basket on her back; the woman in the center carries a basket on her back; the woman on the right seems to be marsha
tring:
	- what is it, mr. secretary? what are you tring to say?
trinket:
	andy no, i took it off my list.  i got to thinking, you know - i'm already too internet-addicted as it is.   i don't really need to check my email at traffic lights.  it'd just be another first-world trinket lashing me to the gotta-stay-informed noise-grid.  i realized, man...i gotta start moving in the opposite direction if i ever want to feel contentment again.
triumph:
	146146;  a triumph is insulted
triumphant:
	he returns home, triumphant, dragging the beast with him.
trivialised:
	049049;  majesty is trivialised
trivialize:
	 guys gender reassignment surgery is a very delicate subject for many people and i'll thank you not to trivialize it for a cheap gag okay seriously [
troll:
	  i shall write the nasty little troll into my stories!
tron:
	your title is "the { chrono, neuro, aero, cosmo, reve, necro, cyber, astro, psycho, steam, meta, black | punk, mech, noiac, (o)poli, naut, phage, droid, bot, blade, tron, mancer, war} s."
troops:
	  ah!  our scouts report that the enemy commander is far too busy walloping his troops with a croquet-mallet to mount a proper offensive at the moment.  do invite him for tea
troubleshooting:
	 troubleshooting the injector becomes clogged after veinous insertion. solution pump foot-pedal vigorously. potato will resume flowing.
truckers:
	tivo ice road truckers for her?
truckstops:
	 he had been to a machine that predicted his death.  receiving 'scale,' he kept himself trim and avoided shipyards and truckstops.  and then, when maurice entered the room with his large eel, his blood froze.
trudging:
	 everyone just trudging out of the assembly staring at their feet
trumped:
	 in los angeles, where i live, there seem to have been a lot of people whose dire need for employment somehow trumped the city engineer's need for people who actually knew how to design highway interchanges
trusting:
	arthur everything i worked toward my whole life was an illusion.  nothing is worth trusting.  the universe is capricious and we should be terrified.  and now it's too late!  i've wasted my life!  i was too blinded by happiness to realize how miserable  should always have been!
trusts:
	mikey nobody trusts the eater to be able to handle a cupcake with a darker, more unpleasant flavor!  everyone wants chocolate and vanilla and sugar, sugar, sugar.  life is not just sugar!  real life has vinegar and mustard and salt!
truthfully:
	 i like the daily show a lot, but nobody seems to listen to jon when he insists (truthfully) that it's a comedy show, not a factual news show.
tryn:
	 i worked on the television campaign for the movie 'robots' and at one point we used the james brown song 'dr. detroit' and there is a line that goes, 'get up offa that thang, dance 'til you feel better, get up offa that thang, tryn'ta relieve that pressure' and i swear it was so infectious i had to keep standing up and dancing feverishly before i could go on
tryptophan:
	about to fall into a tryptophan coma!
tryyih:
	- dih yuh sah tryyih tah cahstahpay?
tsava:
	woman 2 ayplej ahleejanz tooda flahg uvdaa yooneye teydstay tsava merraka
tsunami:
	big bird every day i live is a tsunami of intense hatred and self-loathing.
tuberculosis:
	a picture is shown that says "dr. johnson's $30 health-lift." if you suffer from palsy, we will treat you. if you are afflicted with pox, we will address you. even if you are right now dying of tuberculosis, call us. will you be healed? almost certainly not. but we will talk with you so you're not lonely. (as we are.)
tubes:
	karl little-known fact toothpaste tubes do not contain toothpaste.  they create toothpaste.
tubing:
	everyone has experienced trouble related to insufficient potato consumption. but how to make time for the labor involved in regular kitchen preparation? with the potato injector, the time for fretting is past. using surgical-grade tubing, the injector pipes pulped potato nectar into your body intravenously.
tuck:
	 tuck into 
tucked:
	two lovely women, one standing facing the door with what appears to be a riding crop tucked under her arm, and drawing on a pair of gloves.  we'll call her elaine.  the other, wendy, is sitting at the table, looking at elaine.  elaine's back is to wendy, and she is glancing over her shoulder.
tugs:
	he tugs on the figure's cloak.
tumble:
	barnes  criminy, foster!  took a bit of a tumble there, eh?
tumbles:
	an elephant tumbles through the window.
tummy:
	 snuggle a tummy at 
tumors:
	  2029 everyone is dead from brain tumors caused by comprehensive municipal wi-fi
tundra:
	wolf i'm a wolf now, dude! come join me! leave the upright world to the money-worshippers and run free in the tundra!
tunic:
	madge "i'm nervous that this house is full of ghosts," dirk breathed, his broad shoulders filling his tunic with man-mass.
tupperware:
	 i'm not gonna dirty a tupperware for three spoonfuls of spaghetti! washing it will be even more wasteful! hot water! soap! time!
turbans:
	several bearded men in turbans sit around a table.
turbine:
	coal in the home. the family in question had attached turbine-boilers to every device in the home toasters, refrigerators, can-openers &c. what reports fail to mention is that the lady of the house works in a factory where the small boilers are manufactured. she acquires them at a steep discount. this is clearly out of range for the average family.
turkeys:
	two turkeys.
turmoil:
	large bug with pincers in foreground, city in turmoil in background, aeroplanes, miniature automobile
turncoat:
	student those turncoat heretics are all gonna burn in baja someday. says so in scripture.
turnip:
	left bifton's gonna be ridin' the upside-down turnip truck all the way to tuscaloosa, that's for sure.
turnover:
	632632; a dramatic turnover in management
turnvalve:
	felix wearing a jetpack check it out!  i just finished the upgrade to my starpincher!  put in a double-chamber preboiler and a hundred-torque turnvalve.  zero to forty-five in a click point seven.  hah!
turquoise:
	woman we have established a wintergreen napkin palette.  these turquoise pepper mills you found suggest a fundamentally southwestern character.
tuscaloosa:
	left bifton's gonna be ridin' the upside-down turnip truck all the way to tuscaloosa, that's for sure.
tutelage:
	professor i first made the acquaintance of young master malki ! when he came under my tutelage at oxford -- introduction to mad biochemistry, as i recall. frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. "malki !, my lad," i told him on more than one occasion, "if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then i fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world." but some boys just refuse to listen.
tweeted:
	"bobby pflugelblager is rad. he's super active on the cracked.com fan forums, plus drew carey re-tweeted one of his twitpics like a year ago."
tweets:
	jenny's mom shows up.  dialogue covers the tweets.
twelfths:
	 because charging by twelfths of a mile would be ridiculous
twentieth:
	interrogator you are not funny, james garfield! you are not funny, mister twentieth president of the united states! everybody, repeat after me garfield is not funny
twinkie:
	george washington turning away woah, food! when i eat a twinkie it turns into me!
twins:
	he ate a pair of twins and threw their bones into a tiger pit
twist:
	voicemail to report a lost or stolen card, twist the receiver in opposite directions with both hands.  have a resealable glass container nearby to catch the liquid that emerges from the earpiece.  in a dark, quiet room, press your face against the mouth of the container and tell the liquid exactly what happened to your card.  vivid memories are best.  the good times your card enabled you to have.  tell it all this, and seal it.
twister:
	you never hear about high-rise condos being damaged by a twister.
twitches:
	 master, did you know susan twitches in her sleep?
twitpics:
	"bobby pflugelblager is rad. he's super active on the cracked.com fan forums, plus drew carey re-tweeted one of his twitpics like a year ago."
twosies:
	carlos on mexico, creatures are segregated by horn quality into inviolable casts that annually rotate civic duties,  right now twosies are the lawyers, threesies the bakers, and ninesies like us are the astronauts.
ty:
	088088;  ty employs questionable methods
tygra:
	oh, stuff it.  where's your spine?  are you tygra or snarf?
tying:
	seashore.  a woman is standing with her hands in her hair, possibly tying back a loose strand.  an old skeevy man pinches her on the bottom.
tyler:
	if obama wins, it'll probably be historic for reasons other than his being the fourteenth (after carter, nixon, jefferson, cleveland, both johnsons, tyler, hayes, jackson, madison, grant, wilson and arguably taylor) to feature palindromic vowel-consonant dispersion.
tyme:
	character 2 so -- if your reptile-brain is telling you to stay away, it probably knows something about the particular tolerance of your particular immune system. but my reptile-brain thinks i can handle it. it's telling me it's sandwich tyme.
typeface:
	horace ?i look around the store and i realize why i'm kind of dizzy.  the sign on the counter is in comic sans.  on the window it's copperplate gothic.  and on the receipt it's monotype corsiva.  monotype corsiva!  so i said that's it!  i'll never again patronize any business that uses any typeface i can recognize!
typefaces:
	horace typefaces.
typepad:
	 it's not even blogger or typepad, it's some crap like xanga
typo:
	"i follow him on twitter and once got an @ reply when i found a typo on one of his zazzle shirts"
typographical:
	650650; the typographical terror
tyranny:
	the tyranny of quality
uber:
	 tooth magazine folded in '89 when advertisers withdrew their support following the publishing of a controversial illustration featuring c. everett koop driving a bulldozer through tianenmen square. the caption 'fluoride uber alles'
ubiquitous:
	jeremy  sure.  all our makeup.  i mean, you and i didn't meet until adulthood, but thanks to ubiquitous mass media, we had a shared childhood nonetheless.
uhhm:
	cliff  uhhm
ukuleles:
	larry they made a dance mix from my tugboat sounds!  then pretty girls with ukuleles did covers of the dance mix.  honey.  andy samberg played me on snl.  making boat noises.  they love me.  they want what i got.
ulrike:
	ulrike honey, you're eight months old.  you weren't even alive last christmas.
ultra:
	ross decades of scientific research have gone into making this the strongest, most potent gullible ever.  previously available only to industry professionals, i'm pleased to offer it now in a new, ultra-concentrated form ten times more potent than any gullible you already have.
ultraviolet:
	dora last semester i had a student devise an elaborate scheme where he reduced vast swaths of the textbook into a shorthand notation that he printed onto his hands with ultraviolet ink... ...then he put a tiny l.e.d. blacklight in the bridge of his glasses.  much harder than simply studying, of course.
ummm:
	- ummm... doctor?
unable:
	gordy a fawn oh, you know?every day i'm increasingly angry at myself for being unable to fulfill the promises i whisper into my pillow in the dead of night
unacceptable:
	father o'malley  this is unacceptable.  that boy has got to learn respect for other!  when he gets here, he's going to get the lecture of his young life!
unachievable:
	ken [narrating the math again] uh, well, you see, h.v.i. is merely a comparison metric to help you see how haircuts of different prices match up!  it, uh, can't help you find the very best value haircut in the world or anything like that!  that'd be a free haircut that looks good forever.  that limit goes to infinity.  zombies take over the planet and your corpse still looks great, that sort of thing.  forget it.  it's unachievable!
unaddressed:
	no need shall stand unaddressed. there is a way to make things better.
unaffected:
	the other man is still absorbed in his book, unaffected
unappreciated:
	no craft shall pass unappreciated. it is always worthwhile to pause and intake a thing of beauty. plus, it may spark a concordant idea of one's own.
unattended:
	 why, this trophy's just sitting here unattended!
uncanny:
	  the uncanny 
unchallenging:
	janice because an unchallenging life would be boring.
uncleburglar:
	waiter  let's see...rusty tricycle, uncleburglar, steelhouse stiltwalker, boogerbrau, prancing minotaur, dunderschnauzen, chairfarter stout, and aardshark.
uncomfortably:
	gaston so far every conversation we've had this year has ended uncomfortably.
unconscious:
	colonel in lieu of gifts i shall throw stones.  when stones are exhausted i shall throw ice.  we will continue until all present are unconscious.
unconventional:
	384384;  are tried unconventional methods
uncooked:
	woman at left, behind gax, looks on disapprovingly,eyebrows slightly raised, her eyes fixed on the aliens as she hears his reaction.  gax, just left of center, holding his walking stick in his right hand like moses' rod, does not appear any too enthused to see the aliens.  on the right, the two aliens, with bodies like plucked uncooked chickens except with armlike appendages instead of wings, ending in two grotesque long ced fingers, stare fixedly up at gax as he makes his pronouncement.  the bulging eyes of one show dismay; the other looks shocked or startled.
undecided:
	father  we're still undecided.
undercurrent:
	diane i see the appeal, but there's a strange stilted undercurrent of being treated like criminals at our wedding.
underdogs:
	john who decided they should announce the score by saying which team's winning?  that seems one-sided.  people love underdogs, right?  framing the score in terms of which team has an obstacle to overcome would be more engaging!
undergo:
	foster  will you undergo catechism in her ancient religion?
underground:
	rex i got a great tip on a tiny little place.  super hip.  super underground.  you'll dig it.
undermining:
	thus undermining your credibility further.
underpants:
	 not my face!  the one thing i can never change!  (besides my lucky underpants)
understands:
	181181;  no one understands
understood:
	6. i've never understood the lyrics to "u can't touch this." is he talking about his...
underwriters:
	 major underwriters include 
undignified:
	lincoln i say, old chap, i think the most undignified way to die would be to be robbed and murdered by lower-class hooligans.
undisputed:
	- soaring above the pitiful world below, i am undisputed master of all i survey!
uneasy:
	walt-whitman-headed bat some small boon, some favor, some easy accessory against each day's uneasy burden?  so that your young, handsome faces may shine with newfound delight?
unemployment:
	bird well, *you're* on unemployment while still taking work under the table.  *that* can't be great for the state budget.
unending:
	newspaper text such are the benefits afforded us all by the unending march of progress, that each new dawn finds many a person safe, fed, clothed and sheltered. a citizen of our modern era rarely finds him- or herself in a deadly battle for survival, as was common for the first generations of mankind. thus do our bodies, evolved for and hardened by constant struggle, often find themselves idle; and without some constant whetting, thus swiftly begins the degenerative process of death.
unenforced:
	woman  everyone's talking about how these things should have been *predicted*, should have been *stopped*.  seems so obvious in hindsight.  so what regulations are going unenforced *right this second*?  what abuses are people *noticing* but not mentioning?  what crises yet to come are still *preventable*?
unequivocally:
	"directions. 1. if the box you have obtained is larger than the prescribed size, cut it down to size. we have done extensive testing and our size is unequivocally the best. if your box needs to be watertight (say, if some of your unfinished projects involve plumbing, rainwater reclamation, or crab-husbandry) be sure to seal the new seams you are creating with plumber's goop. also take care to cut straight so that your seams will join smoothly. really 80% of this project is getting the seams right. the rest is just putting stuff in a box."
unfair:
	bobby that is so unfair! i hate you! i wish i lived with mom!
unfairly:
	and maybe you have been judged unfairly!  you'll never know if you deserve your success.
unfamiliar:
	old ant what with your absurd musical taste, generically rebellious nature, and unfamiliar/threatening media-consumption habits 
unfashionable:
	washington oh, i quite agree. that would certainly be a most unfashionable way to meet one's demise.
unfazed:
	hector creeps up behind her and nuzzles her shoulder.  she is unfazed.
unfettered:
	talosian captain pike is welcome to spend the rest of his life with us, unfettered by his physical body.
unfinished:
	"directions. 1. if the box you have obtained is larger than the prescribed size, cut it down to size. we have done extensive testing and our size is unequivocally the best. if your box needs to be watertight (say, if some of your unfinished projects involve plumbing, rainwater reclamation, or crab-husbandry) be sure to seal the new seams you are creating with plumber's goop. also take care to cut straight so that your seams will join smoothly. really 80% of this project is getting the seams right. the rest is just putting stuff in a box."
unfolds:
	498498;  a rich drama unfolds
unforseen:
	096096;  an act has unforseen consequences
unfortunately:
	the two-day-old dinosaur toy erupts in a ball of flame, which unfortunately incinerates kate and her daughter as well.
ungracious:
	 grizzlies are notoriously ungracious
unhappy:
	 the person on the oil rig wasn't happy. the people in the plastic refinery or whatever weren't happy. the guy driving the truck and the kid stocking the store shelves were both unhappy.
unhealthy:
	giovanni it's unhealthy!  listen, here's my card.  i'm a psychologist specializing in anxiety-causing obsessions.  give me a call.
unheard:
	- for too long has my people's voice gone unheard! for too long has the earth cried out with grief for the souls of my ancestors!
unhelpful:
	the unhelpful natives 
unhinged:
	chris' eyes bulge as his head is forced back painfully far.  his jaw is practically unhinged and his throat is swollen grotesquely.  a mass protrudes from his mouth, and atop the mass is a banner reading thanks.
unicycling:
	nurse well, what did you expect?  people spend years perfecting unicycling.
unidentified:
	unidentified but we all know what it is body part  me, too.
unifinished:
	a large picture shows a box full of stuff, captioned "why let the detritus of previous failed projects clutter up your workspace and demoralize you? put it away for good." "build a junk box - for all your unifinished projects"
uniformly:
	 there must be a gentleman's agreement between envelope manufacturers to make their glues taste uniformly like ass
unimpressed:
	walt-whitman-headed bat o listen, unimpressed mortals -
uninteresting:
	mikey that is so childish and uninteresting!  just following a formula!  i'm talking about making art.  taking risks.  shocking the senses with something complex and uncomfortable.
unionize:
	 unionize 
uniquely:
	later maggie millie!  how are you?  how's the baby? / millie just wonderful!  we've been teaching him lingala, so he'll be uniquely qualified to do humanitarian work in the congo. / maggie but... / millie check and mate
unironic:
	jamaal  come on!  the heroism!  the sweeping vistas!  the unironic presentation of cut-and-dried morality!
unite:
	the new chancellor will need to unite the barnyard...so why make that job harder by spending a solid year dividing it?
united:
	interrogator you are not funny, james garfield! you are not funny, mister twentieth president of the united states! everybody, repeat after me garfield is not funny
university:
	jamaal  hey, you wanna go to the university screening series?  this semester they're doing westerns.
unleashed:
	how is the world better off now that you've unleashed yourself upon a perfectly good plunger?
unlimited:
	karl when you squeeze the tube, you generate energy.  this powers a chemical reaction that results in the formation of a semi-solid mass.  which plops out the end.  theoretically it's unlimited!  but because of the half-life of the chemical catalysts, each reaction requires twice as much energy as the one before.
unmatched:
	the mangler. should your handicrafts call for fresh bone marrow, this bench-mounted device will extract it speedily.  why pay more for store-bought?  fresh is unmatched for flavor.  $3.50
unmoving:
	two cats sit facing each other across a chessboard, unmoving.
unnerstan:
	john "comin' up ta me/ pickin' up my hand/ she looks real serious an' i do not unnerstan'"
uno:
	older  wait, i thought we all were playing with uno cards
unpredictable:
	 as you develop new skills and master new levels, it combines its challenges in wholly unpredictable ways.
unprintable:
	  i happen to have his card right here! [unprintable gesture]
unqualified:
	 the device was completely and utterly destroyed. the experiment was an unqualified success.
unquote:
	 i have been told that my aura is quote-musky-unquote
unread:
	456456;  the rules go unread
unreal:
	rodney man, i hate these unreal expectations in music!  everyone's always harping on you to hit every single note.  nobody's perfect, yo!  batting .400 in baseball gets you into the hall of fame.  but for some reason i just get yelled at!
unreasonable:
	howard ...and really the point is that this blog is my private space and i should be free to say whatever i want! it's so rude of him to expect me to censor myself just to please his own insecurity.  i certainly don't tell him how to conduct his affairs, and i can't see how it's unreasonable for me to expect the same simple courtesy.  for...
unrectified:
	  ma'am, as a duly sworn butt inspector i cannot let any slight within my purview go unrectified.
unrelated:
	 probably for unrelated reasons
unrelenting:
	father soon, nothing will be handed to you any longer. you will fight for everything, snatching every small victory from the unrelenting jaws of fate.
unremembered:
	 there is much that goes unremembered in these situations
unsaid:
	139139;  much goes unsaid
unsalvageable:
	 david malki ! is not an easy man to know. he's like ... like a row which has been filled completely save for a 3 and a 7, but there is not enough information in the surrounding grid to determine which digit should go  box, a delicate state  a single misstep could lead to further erroneous assumptions, compounding upon itself until the entire puzzle is rendered unsalvageable. sometimes i suspect he doesn't even *like* sudoku.
unseen:
	dawn too late!  old news!  health care is the biggest problem facing our society since dukakis rode a tank!  grave pronouncements are hitting the media at rates unseen since the cuban missile crisis!
unsettling:
	victor [holding a?pool cue?] have you ever been in a situation that was just a little bit unsettling, just barely enough to get the pit of your stomach seizing up like a fist clenching but only weakly like an arthritic fist
unsheathe:
	 uphold and unsheathe 
unsourced:
	the steve that's an unsourced statement.  you'll have to add some citations.
unspoken:
	phil but it wasn't me!  it didn't have my childhood or my kinks or my aspirations or any of the unspoken fears that color the real me's daily decision-making.
unstated:
	with the help of a { sarcastic female techno-geek, tomboyish female mechanic, shape-shifting female assassin, leather-clad female in shades, girl who's always loved him, bookish female scholar with mousy brown hair, cherubic girl with pigtails and spunk, female who inexplicably becomes attracted to the damaged protagonist for unstated reasons
unto:
	personal emails are an abomination unto my sight.
unwanted:
	304304;  an unwanted dog factors
unwelcome:
	- that's it! i've had quite enough of your unwelcome advances! one more word, and you're on the sidewalk!
unwise:
	048048;  joviality proves unwise
unworkable:
	dora so he sits there squinting at his hands the whole time, trying to decode the textbook... really a totally unworkable solution.   he barely managed a c-plus.
unworthy:
	- and so i just sit there, and he's all "i feel coarse and unworthy in your presence, so i'll just go." this after hours of furtive glances he turns and leaves.
unwrap:
	woman merry christman, darling! time to unwrap your present!
updated:
	 updated regularly at 
upgrade:
	felix wearing a jetpack check it out!  i just finished the upgrade to my starpincher!  put in a double-chamber preboiler and a hundred-torque turnvalve.  zero to forty-five in a click point seven.  hah!
upgrades:
	felix did you finish the upgrades?
uphold:
	 uphold and unsheathe 
upholstery:
	fine furniture, upholstery and decoration. we will describe nice things to you, so you can pretend to own them with a sense of authority. 621 broadway, new-york.
upload:
	woman it's a site where you can upload your own t-shirt designs, and people vote on them.
uppercut:
	 why can't i uppercut
uppermost:
	hellacious star-fiend i am a being from beyond the stars.  please deliver cookies to my uppermost orifice.
upping:
	leonard  oh, yeah.  everyone's doing it, one-upping each other to see who can live the cheapest.
uprooting:
	black  i know recrimination doesn't solve matters, but i'm finding it very hard not to blame you for everything. uprooting whole cultures, transporting them across the globe, dehumanizing an entire race.
upset:
	- oh, he's just upset because he's lost his mitten.
uptight:
	alvin i told you to be more uptight with your gardening!  you're inviting in all sorts of crazies.  what with your assorted wildflowers.
uranium:
	 and my colleagues who put used needles into bananas and depleted uranium into grapes aren't doing any better!!
urban:
	he continues to fly over the urban sprawl.
urchin:
	i don't want him becoming some texting-crazed exhibitionist facebook-urchin with a narcissistic sense of entitlement!
urge:
	 well, something shifted and now i have a desperate urge to poop out all my ribs
urged:
	we are not urged to be good for goodness' own sake, but rather to escape judgment.
urgent:
	hobart has an urgent need.  overhead is a large banner.
urgently:
	billy there's no one i need to talk to so urgently.
urggoth:
	ogre stand back ... i'll give them a taste of the flame-spear of urggoth!
urgh:
	bill ah!  urgh!  i feel sick!  weak!  depressed!
urine:
	 ...like i'm drenched in urine, yeah, but what about my aura?
urk:
	susan urk
urologist:
	130130;  a urologist guffaws
urologists:
	todd become what?  partners in a whaling boat?  rival spoon collectors?  veterinary urologists?
uruk:
	 go close to the eanna temple, the residence of ishtar, such as no later king or man equaled!  go up the wall of uruk and walk around, examine its foundation, inspect its brickwork thoroughly.  go 0.8 miles on broadview terrace, then bear slight right turn and turn onto california avenue, for your destination will be on the right.
utensil:
	2. in the seventh grade, i invented a new eating utensil called the "clingting." i ate every meal with it for four and a half years.  it involved magnets.
utopia:
	katie what happened to the last crew we elected to bring about change?  we're no closer now to the utopia they promised us last election.  why do we think this bunch will do any better?
uvdaa:
	woman 2 ayplej ahleejanz tooda flahg uvdaa yooneye teydstay tsava merraka
vacated:
	man #2 and the old job that the new vp vacated...?
vacationing:
	- in 1882 while vacationing abroad, lord alistair bludd-smythe invented the "blumpkin", the "rusty steamer", the "dirty sanchez", the "steaming dragon", and the "grumpy munchkin", all which remain popular to this very day!
vacuuming:
	woman because you are making a pig of yourself. why must you fixate on vacuuming up every last crumb?
vader:
	edwin no, i thought she would reciprocate by getting me a darth vader mediation egg for the living room.
valley:
	westmoreland  hey man, what's shakin'.  what's the story with this valley?  this a good place to live, you think?
valuable:
	 being picky has cost him valuable time!
vanish:
	 problems vanish with 
vanity:
	vanity fair. for meerschaum and cigarettes. does not bite the tongue. listen, let's not beat around the bush. you want some primo cigarettes, right? but why - what's the big deal? is it just flavor? that's very subjective. no. you want to look cool. so shut up and grab one of our cigarettes. it's made of bomber-jacket leather. there is nothing cooler in the world. the best. bomber cigs - so good - so bad
vanquish:
	amy  "although basic courtesy doesn't explain foreign genocide, highly-intuitive japanese kids let machines narrate old people's quiet recollections, seeking to ultimately vanquish wichita's xenophobic young zealots."
vapors:
	 recognizable smells are specific combinations of airborne molecules called odorants. odorants are chemical vapors which must permeate a mucous membrane to bond with olfactory receptors.
vari:
	dean an anteater actually, my proboscis allows me to reach into narrow openings to retrieve vari
variants:
	 plus all the variants "he will have glonden", "he would have ben glondering" ...
varying:
	now, every message archie has is from buster and they're all nothing but arf arf arf arf arf arf, varying only in the number of arfs.  six of these in a two-hour period, with a particularly long one at 41 minutes ago.
vast:
	dora last semester i had a student devise an elaborate scheme where he reduced vast swaths of the textbook into a shorthand notation that he printed onto his hands with ultraviolet ink... ...then he put a tiny l.e.d. blacklight in the bridge of his glasses.  much harder than simply studying, of course.
vault:
	guard  this is the royal jewel vault, not your neighbor's wireless internet.
vaulted:
	another boy has now vaulted atop the barrel.
vaulting:
	are we talking mountain-vaulting altitudes or is it more a graze-the-steeples type of affair?
vd:
	tall  tv?  ugh.  more like vd.
veal:
	- ...is one night closer to veal chops slathered with mustard on rye slabs.
vegetables:
	eel fresh fruits and vegetables.
vegetarian:
	5. i used to be a vegetarian for moral reasons, but ever since a cow kicked my baby brother in the head i've switched to an all-beef diet.  those jerks deserve it.
veil:
	a woman in a bridal veil enters on the left
veiled:
	- essentially i am making a veiled plea for belated presents.
veils:
	desperation reeks from these walls.  this morning, you ate great handfuls of pretzels through thick veils of tears.  you will do the same tomorrow.
vein:
	(5) tie off arm above the elbow and tap to make the basilic vein bulge. daub with iodine and give the needle-crank three full turns.
veining:
	a contraption with black paper sticking out "4. x-ray viewers are great for spot-checking leaves for suspicious veining. good gardens need a lot of work and attention."
veinous:
	 troubleshooting the injector becomes clogged after veinous insertion. solution pump foot-pedal vigorously. potato will resume flowing.
velocipedes:
	 also pretend they are wearing top hats or riding velocipedes or something
velour:
	- i simply love his velour
velourist:
	- i have the best velourist in town
venetian:
	alex furtively peers through his venetian blinds...
venoms:
	sidney  aaahh your constant, belittling gaze turns my venoms backward!  so much self-conscious that it cracks my stoic facade!
ventilated:
	brian keep your gills well ventilated
venture:
	 this is not really a business venture that scales
verb:
	suited man with beard verb, past tense.
verbose:
	 dear mr malki while i enjoy your work it is incredibly obvious to everybody that you would rather be writing a parody strip titled 'incredibly verbose garfield'
veritas:
	 in vino veritas at 
vessel:
	talosian ...it was thought the fiction of a court-martial would prevent you from too soon regaining control of your vessel.
vessels:
	 it's sublimation of neural moisture, causing constriction of the blood vessels
vests:
	a young man and an older man, both dressed in suits, ties, and vests, are riding what appears to be a large-wheeled side-by-side tandem device
veteran:
	 their other big hit 'this memorial day, i'm a veteran...of you.'
veterinarian:
	leon gently caressing the horse buttercup you can't be a veterinarian if you love animals.  always seeing them in pain...and so often knowing there's nothing you can do... ...it would deaden your sensitivity to the preciousness of all the earth's living things.
vexes:
	382382;  hair vexes
via:
	- this is what happens when you try to be sarcastic via e-mail.
vial:
	 the man on the far left is is declining a refill from a jeweled vial of tears collected from the woman second from the right
vibrant:
	second woman so kind you are! and your aura - so vibrant and green!
vice:
	man #1 vice president of global operations. he gets  learjet and a butler.
vicinity:
	  here to inspect all the butts in the vicinity.  just making sure everything's up to code.
vicki:
	vicki was he being sarcastic
victims:
	otto all our money has a history.  bribes paid to politicians...hush money paid to victims...drugs and even human beings bought and sold...that money makes its way into our banks.  it carries negativity with it.  someone's starting a business, or buying toys for their baby?  they don't want iran-contra money.  they want nice money.  money with positive energy.
victoria:
	- her majesty queen victoria once levelled a disapproving scowl of such ferocious intensity that none of the servant at buckingham palace were capable of shameful bodily functions for three whole days!
videos:
	  there was a period a few months ago when george was watching a lot of lute videos on youtube.
videotapes:
	ruth i know, but hating him seems so easy. he's a sneering beanpole on grainy videotapes with a watermelon-shaped beard! all he needs is a cackling ferret sidekick to be a mid-'90s disney villain!
vie:
	 c'est la vie 
viewers:
	a contraption with black paper sticking out "4. x-ray viewers are great for spot-checking leaves for suspicious veining. good gardens need a lot of work and attention."
vigilance:
	312312;  an officer exercises vigilance
vigorous:
	 on the peel-off part of the sticker it continues on to say ''...and given the inherent limitations of the medium i frankly cannot comprehend its appeal as a vehicle for the vigorous exchange of ideas"
viking:
	a viking faces off against a soldier guarding a castle with a gatling gun
viktor:
	viktor  four dolla'
vile:
	- ahh! the vile undead!
vileness:
	 the stomach flu is like nature picking your body's pockets over and over and over again - and not finding anything but vileness, but still coming back to try again. nature is disgusting
vilest:
	- your work is absolutely the vilest filth i have ever seen! who would pose for this garbage?
vill:
	apparatchik there vill be no mention of god!
villager:
	stan an antelope-headed man bearing a large sack on his back, and wearing a dress kind villager!  is this the fabled town of inclusia?  where all are welcomed and respected, no matter what?
villainizing:
	henry i'm tired of being commanded to blindly fear this or that.  people trip over themselves villainizing everything.
vin:
	- vin diesel swanson.
vindicated:
	 i'll either succeed, or i'll be vindicated!  win-win
vine:
	i swear, getting you to move is like a lame, one-legged ancestor of a sloth who's twice as slow trying to use a frayed old piece of crunchy vine to pull a cruise ship!
vingt:
	charlie  what are the "fancy eggs au vingt-neuf?"
vinny:
	vinny haw, look at that nerd!  bet he's never seen a naked woman before!
vino:
	 in vino veritas at 
vintage:
	 two women in 1800s vintage dresses whom we will call lily (standing) and ruth (sitting).
vintages:
	654654;  cheese vintages
violated:
	- so, the only logical explanation is that the publisher is spying on me! watching my every move, sharting my every emotion... my privacy is gone! my civil liberties violated! i hope my hair looks okay.
violence:
	culminating in { a fistfight atop a tower, a daring rescue preceding a giant explosion, a heroic sacrifice that no one will ever remember, a philosophical argument punctuated by violence, a false victory with the promise of future danger, the invocation of a spell at the last possible moment, eternal love professed without irony, the land restored to health, authorial preaching through the mouths of the characters, convoluted nonsense that squanders the readers' goodwill, wish-fulfillment solutions to real-world problems, a cliffhanger for the sake of prompting a series.
violent:
	you mean you're okay with intense sequences of violent action; liberal use of profanity, suggestive material, and drug references; and exactly one occurence of the "f" word?
violinssssss:
	 rodney kill the violinssssss
vioxx:
	marc which seemingly harmless substance that we use every day is actually slowly poisoning us?  lead.  asbestos.  teflon.  thalomide.  vioxx.  makes you wonder what's next.  what they haven't figured out is deadly yet.  so i'm just playing it safe.
virile:
	donna oh, you are so handsome and virile.  what would we ever do without the light you bring to our lives.
virility:
	- a man's ride is a potent symbol of his virility.
virtues:
	137137;  the virtues of alcohol are extolled
virulent:
	professor i first made the acquaintance of young master malki ! when he came under my tutelage at oxford -- introduction to mad biochemistry, as i recall. frightfully lacking in his dedication to matters of academia. "malki !, my lad," i told him on more than one occasion, "if you persist in your obsession with comical engravings when you should be hard at work developing better and more virulent strains of neurotoxin, then i fail to see how you ever hope to inspire fear in the governments of the world." but some boys just refuse to listen.
virus:
	- you there! have you seen my son go by? he's infected by a terrible virus that will kill one-third of the earth's population, making five-eights of those remaining lactose intolerant while granting amazing super-powers to a quarter of the remainder!
visa:
	ben  that rebate is issued as a prepaid visa card.
visage:
	simmons and not-simmons now bear the visage of the goofy elk.
viscera:
	tim (missing the front of his chest and ribcage, his viscera are exposed) getting cold
visceral:
	phil you know, i think falling back into a warm bed after briefly getting up is probably life's single greatest visceral pleasure.
viscosity:
	husband "its first bowel movement yielded 400 grams of excretum, having the viscosity of warm butter."
viscount:
	 barnyard chancellor is primarily a ceremonial position anyway. the viscount of the hayloft has all the real power.
viscous:
	josh but viscous bile drips from their ragged flesh, searing the earth in pancake-sized globs of corroding
vishnu:
	 i swear to vishnu this is a 100% true story
visibly:
	she is melting, and quite visibly at that
visionaries:
	katie so if we feed the system visionaries, and it spits them out as mediocrities...then what we need is some sort of extreme double mega-visionary who'll get worn down to the level of 'visionary.'
visited:
	jim-bob  as far as you know, you're visited by your future self every day.
vistas:
	jamaal  come on!  the heroism!  the sweeping vistas!  the unironic presentation of cut-and-dried morality!
visual:
	visual evan's horrified parents.
vivian:
	vivian what?  can't hear you over all the holiday cheer
vizabul:
	womans 2 inda vizabul witlibberdey annjus tisferol
vlad:
	vlad you just played a hungry-man last turn!  you're making up rules again.  we haven't voted on lean cuisines yet.
vlog:
	 to me my eyeshadow! i would make a vlog entry.
vocal:
	alan your voice...it sounds kind of like a gaxian who is pretty good at shape-shifting his vocal cords, but not great.
void:
	- dear aunt mabel, thank you very much for the wonderful black void.
volleyball:
	- your coat is covered in old jelly stains and you breath smells like beef wellington. be still, my heart. and the clincher? i can almost hear the crab lice playing volleyball in your shorts.
volume:
	a professor sits, reading from a slim volume held in his hand.
volunteer:
	mr. meanscary  this is going to make it very hard to volunteer for the kiwanis club.
volunteered:
	evan my friend, you've just volunteered to be my first victim!
volunteering:
	woman so you're volunteering?
vomiting:
	077077;  vomiting is induced
von:
	dale  wurtzenberger!  wurtzenfeld!  lord chaddenstock von wurtzlemania the tenth earl of chadwurtzville!
vow:
	rocky there shall be carnage!  this i vow!
vowels:
	think of it!  and the first presidential surname with more vowels than consonants!
vp:
	man #2 and the old job that the new vp vacated...?
vr:
	in a (n) { neo-noir, alternate-history, ancient, post-apocalyptic, dystopian, vr-simulated, metaphorical, anachronistic, leather-clad, coal-powered, dragon-filled, shrill | america, japan, soviet russia, victorian britain, medieval europe, aztec empire, atlantis, terraformed mars, antarctica, one-way spaceflight, outer rim world, set from road warrior,
vulgar:
	right ooh! the sudden electricity in the air suggests to me that your strange vegetable-based euphemisms have taken a turn for the vulgar!
vulgarize:
	chad  man, don't vulgarize this.
vulnerable:
	simmons  such a frail and vulnerable animal - i wonder what defense at all it has against predators!
waaaaaa:
	baby waaaaaa
wacked:
	luis  if you think i'm climbing a tree you are wacked in the walnut.
wackjob:
	father in other words, we should elect the most crazy nutball wackjob out there.
wad:
	jake runs in with a wad of money in his hand
waddlesworth:
	gibson girl  great--so let me show you the wilfred q. & barbara k. waddlesworth-stoates retreat for academic contemplation & personal self-actualization!
waddleswourthe:
	 you should hear how he went on when he met the new mailroom guy, abernathy mercutio hoakes-waddleswourthe iv
wager:
	 astonishing! johnson, bring the calipers.  i'd wager this is the largest ovum on record!
wagging:
	 be sure to note the tail wagging in the last panel
wail:
	 'come along chadwick,' said father, pulling the boy roughly by the hand. 'but papa!' came the plaintive wail -- 'the cows, the cows, the cows, the cows!'
wailing:
	moppet  i'm referred to as 'that wailing she-demon' or 'poopy mcpoop-maker' or 'regretty mistakovich'.  didn't you like me?
waist:
	paul stands up to his waist in water, holding an eel.
waistline:
	 granted the foreign situation can't easily explain the waistline of everyone in the country, but it could be a pretty handy scapegoat
waitin:
	ray  dangit bob!  i sprained my thumb twiddlin' waitin' fer you!  i gotta turn tonight's bout to my understudy!
waits:
	millionaire continues to study the strip as malki! waits nervously.
walker:
	giorgi do you want me to get your walker?
wallets:
	cap'n pegwood don't be so harsh on the ol' folks, bobby! they still got wallets you kin steal from, ain't they?
walloping:
	  ah!  our scouts report that the enemy commander is far too busy walloping his troops with a croquet-mallet to mount a proper offensive at the moment.  do invite him for tea
walnut:
	luis  if you think i'm climbing a tree you are wacked in the walnut.
walrus:
	a chubby man with a walrus moustache comes in to the left of mutton chops and ken, struggling under the weight of an enormous summer sausage.
wandered:
	 he has wandered the globe, a restless spirit, haunted by his act, his betrayal of his one true love.  he is about to spend the rest of eternity learning everything there is to know about the three-hole punch.
wanders:
	this comic is hand-drawn. a knight wanders anxiously through a cave, carrying a torch and a sword. he passes a skeleton bound to the wall.
wanger:
	guido hey, this dude wants to put pictures of his wanger into the article about genitals.  we're fine with that, right?
wannabe:
	 that sounds retarded.  seriously, that sounds like shallow, "web 2.0" overblogged crap making one company rich of the backs of a bunch of wannabe-hipster suckers.
warding:
	  for example, everyone "knows" that smoking is bad.  so when you try to explain that yes, smoking is largely bad--but it's also highly effective, in infants, at warding off murderous trans-dimensional bellybutton gnomes...
warehouse:
	-but we'll have to check on that at the warehouse.
warmed:
	 once the glue gun gets warmed up it's really hard to stop
warmest:
	maybe make it "warmest regards."
warmly:
	028028;  justice is served warmly
warn:
	gax i should warn you - it's extremely powerful.
warned:
	brigham  wh--what am i being warned will happen?
warnings:
	chester  thank heavens our shrill, insistent warnings were heeded!
warren:
	a house is shown. builders, where is the bathroom in this house? i have been all over and cannot find it for the life of me. please write soon. a. j. bicknell, 27 warren street, new-york.
warts:
	 still? don't tell me it's the genital warts again.
wasabi:
	 wild wasabi 
washable:
	leonard we use handkerchiefs now, instead of kleenex.  and washable cotton rags instead of paper towels.
washcloth:
	skip nothing worse, right?  cramped space, uncomfortable seats, and some little rugrat just screaming bloody murder like it's a washcloth being wrung out.   well, my invention is a special hood that fits securely around the baby's upper region to effectively muffle any disruptive noises that might disturb fellow passengers.
washed:
	woman are you all washed up for dinner? do you want some juice?
washer:
	loretta  you replaced a washer in the kitchen faucet.
washingtoy:
	- my zachary taylor washingtoy▢!
waterfalls:
	malcolm  really loud background noise.  like waterfalls, or jungle birds, or polka music, or all of the above.
waterfront:
	we're looking over the shoulders of a man wearing a suit and a top hat holding a cane and another man holding wearing a fur-collared coat.  they are sitting on a bench overlooking a waterfront scene in a city.
watering:
	 your tears are only watering me spencer
watermelon:
	ruth i know, but hating him seems so easy. he's a sneering beanpole on grainy videotapes with a watermelon-shaped beard! all he needs is a cackling ferret sidekick to be a mid-'90s disney villain!
waterslide:
	dad  no.  you're in trouble for flooding the basement with your homemade waterslide.
watertight:
	"directions. 1. if the box you have obtained is larger than the prescribed size, cut it down to size. we have done extensive testing and our size is unequivocally the best. if your box needs to be watertight (say, if some of your unfinished projects involve plumbing, rainwater reclamation, or crab-husbandry) be sure to seal the new seams you are creating with plumber's goop. also take care to cut straight so that your seams will join smoothly. really 80% of this project is getting the seams right. the rest is just putting stuff in a box."
watery:
	 it's just a vat of old, watery mayonnaise. and by god, i bought it, i'm gonna find a use for it
waxy:
	robot shaver.  children and animals are not allowed in most robot competitions.  hide your treachery with this shaver - removes hair and imparts a waxy, metallic sheen.  $2.00
wayne:
	you are not wayne brady, my love.
waytothepool:
	guido (a bear in an ill-fitting hat) -waytothepool jinx!
weakest:
	 you are the weakest link, goodbye
weakness:
	soldier (raising an axe)  you should not have revealed your weakness.
weapons:
	luxembourg  remember how, when russia was crashing at afghanistan's place, you funneled weapons to the mujahideen to drive him out?
webcomics:
	 also, webcomics
websites:
	 because, you know, if you're, um, serious, i have some websites you can look at
webster:
	student webster's dictionary.  but you have to read it in a very precise order. teacher well, one more book to ban from schools.
wedge:
	extra croutons and a lemon wedge.
wedged:
	- little to the left. no, my left... man, it's really wedged in there.
weeps:
	elsewhere, the steam-powered autodialer weeps.
weighted:
	weighted with stones, we'll throw it onto the roof and hook it over the ledge.
weirder:
	mother honestly, beth, just when i didn't think you could get any weirder.
welcomed:
	stan an antelope-headed man bearing a large sack on his back, and wearing a dress kind villager!  is this the fabled town of inclusia?  where all are welcomed and respected, no matter what?
wellington:
	- your coat is covered in old jelly stains and you breath smells like beef wellington. be still, my heart. and the clincher? i can almost hear the crab lice playing volleyball in your shorts.
wench:
	 remember to call your mom a wench like i taught ya
western:
	leader i want to see some outside-the-box ideas here, okay? target western devils.  brainstorm.  mahmoud go.
whaa:
	smitty whaa?  huh?
whaaaat:
	brad  whaaaat?
whacked:
	on the floor at lou's feet is some whacked-together pile of random boards that looks nothing like a canoe or a doghouse.
whaling:
	todd become what?  partners in a whaling boat?  rival spoon collectors?  veterinary urologists?
whassa:
	old  so whassa big deal ...
whatevers:
	requests 81 requests to go away 34 empty treehouses 103 carbon whatevers 830 already aw man 411 some kinda cannon 3 french hens 26¢ per 1k impressions go read a book
whats:
	whats this
wheat:
	lara i grew my own wheat.  milled the flour with a stone dug up from my yard.  built the oven out of bricks i sculpted myself.  even evolved a chicken out of a salamander to get eggs.
wheatgrass:
	officer wheatgrass peers around the front of his patrol car.
wheee:
	wheee!!
wheeee:
	thad wheeee
wheeeee:
	 wheeeee
wheelbarrow:
	susie  yes!  please!  it's big and smelly and its poops are like wheelbarrow tires.
wheelly:
	 are you wheelly?
whetting:
	newspaper text such are the benefits afforded us all by the unending march of progress, that each new dawn finds many a person safe, fed, clothed and sheltered. a citizen of our modern era rarely finds him- or herself in a deadly battle for survival, as was common for the first generations of mankind. thus do our bodies, evolved for and hardened by constant struggle, often find themselves idle; and without some constant whetting, thus swiftly begins the degenerative process of death.
whim:
	- hidden away in this isolated barn, you must submit to my every whim!
whimsy:
	 we mere fooles delight in bringing whimsy and magic to the aagggkkkk
whiny:
	beardsley why not?  yeah, but he was sort of a whiny emo bitch, so i said forget it.
whippersnuggin:
	abideen i say!  percy whippersnuggin!  is that you?  whatever happened to you, my good man?  you simply vanished!  and now look at you!
whirl:
	wilfred sure i'll give 'er a whirl.  sounds a bit of a lark
whirled:
	 then, with a mighty caw, the beast whirled and dumped a gallon of chalky white right on rosa's bonnet
whirrrrrr:
	altruismaton mark iv <<click>>  <<whirrrrrr>>
whiskey:
	 whiskey, gin, vodka, spearmint schnapps...
whisle:
	a whistle "9. blow this whisle in joy if he ever bothers to ask how the garden is coming. screw baseball season."
whispered:
	otto then they leaned in real close over my broken body and whispered "stay off our turf."
whitesnake:
	giacomo, wearing a wifebeater and jams, with shades and a box-fade (and muttonchops, an interesting addition), stands nearby as ross, sporting whitesnake hair and a giant clock on a chain around his neck, speaks about the enormous contraption at center.
whittling:
	(1) prepare your whittling tools. a good sharp chisel is of first importance in this work. add to your kit an oilstone and strop. place a few drops of oil on the stone and grind your blade upon its coarse side, then strop to remove the burr.
whoah:
	mustachioed  whoah, tom! i'm sure he didn't mean that.
wholesaler:
	rex let's knock again - you pretend to be a shoelace wholesaler while i try to sneak a peek inside
whoo:
	- whoo! smells like you just befouled your pants!
whoooaaahhh:
	- whoooaaahhh...
whoooooaaaahhh:
	 whoooooaaaahhh
whooooooooo:
	<<train whooooooooo>>
whoopydoo:
	 cheaplaugh manor is on piddlepaddle lane at the intersection of whoopydoo and yardeyardeyaryar
whoouag:
	- whoouag
whopper:
	"out there in the world, if it wasn't for those pesky market forces keeping us down...if only we could charge nine dollars for a whopper, well, by god, we would."
whopping:
	- did you know that a whopping 47 percent of members of congress are millionaires?
whore:
	clown with black armband (thinks) the funeral home painted you up like a $2 whore.
whyyyy:
	samantha  mooommm whyyyy
whyyyyyy:
	samantha  whyyyyyy
wi:
	  2029 everyone is dead from brain tumors caused by comprehensive municipal wi-fi
wichita:
	amy  "although basic courtesy doesn't explain foreign genocide, highly-intuitive japanese kids let machines narrate old people's quiet recollections, seeking to ultimately vanquish wichita's xenophobic young zealots."
wicked:
	westmoreland  wicked.  carter, bust out the gatling guns.  i want to be revered as a god by teatime.
widen:
	710710; the cracks widen
widespread:
	people hear the slogan and think they know the issue.  however, concepts have to trade away complexity to gain widespread appeal!
widow:
	jen i didn't return a dying man's wedding ring to his widow.  i didn't start a charity for the orphaned children of firefighters.  i wanted to, but it was hard.
width:
	the salesman's head is now extremely large, easily twice the width and height of the other man's head. he shouts after the man, who has left, spit flying from his mouth. the duck-creature is confused.
wield:
	reader fine.  ruin it for everybody.  but someday, that power you wield will hurt somebody important to you!
wifebeater:
	giacomo, wearing a wifebeater and jams, with shades and a box-fade (and muttonchops, an interesting addition), stands nearby as ross, sporting whitesnake hair and a giant clock on a chain around his neck, speaks about the enormous contraption at center.
wiffle:
	dennis bouncing a wiffle ball on the shell of an irate turtle while chanting archaic epithets in every indo-european language?
wifi:
	jordan  hey, what's the wifi password?
wifred:
	wifred stings a bit
wiggle:
	 earn some wiggle-room at 
wii:
	gentle wii boxing
wilcox:
	 nobody remembers larry wilcox
wildflowers:
	alvin i told you to be more uptight with your gardening!  you're inviting in all sorts of crazies.  what with your assorted wildflowers.
wilkes:
	the disembodied head of john wilkes booth holds a gun on both of them.
wills:
	571571; the battle of birdy wills
willy:
	i get that a red nose makes for a good toy...but you can't just make willy-nilly additions to santa's official roster!
wilted:
	second gentle awful. lettuce was wilted, and the dressing appeared to be just mayonnaise with flakes of parsley sort of drowned in it.
windowpane:
	a woman's framed by a windowpane.
windshields:
	- i'm done living on the freezing streets. i'm done wiping windshields for crack money. and frankly, i'm done with "us." i'm going back to my palatial mansion with my six dozen servants and my cabana boy, julio.
windstream:
	 i can dig it. it ain't the process, it's the meaning. it's putting a hand in the windstream of that old, ancient interplay between fabric and moisture.
wine:
	lois actually, philosophers call that the oenophile's quandary!  presented with something that, over time, increases in quality (like wine) or in value (like money in a savings account), when's the right time to use it?  if you're saving for a rainy day, how hard does it have to rain before that's it?  and as the item gains worth, wouldn't it have to rain harder and harder before it makes sense to pop that cork?
wined:
	- those invisible death-ships are trigger-happy, man. i want those ambassadors wined and dined and bought whatever they want. / the rich can get rich and stay rich and get even richer so long as they stay a step ahead of the expensive tastes of the monsters who hold the planet's survival in their volatile claws!
wings:
	woman at left, behind gax, looks on disapprovingly,eyebrows slightly raised, her eyes fixed on the aliens as she hears his reaction.  gax, just left of center, holding his walking stick in his right hand like moses' rod, does not appear any too enthused to see the aliens.  on the right, the two aliens, with bodies like plucked uncooked chickens except with armlike appendages instead of wings, ending in two grotesque long ced fingers, stare fixedly up at gax as he makes his pronouncement.  the bulging eyes of one show dismay; the other looks shocked or startled.
winnings:
	otto redeeming it.  [to dave]  ah, yes.  looks like these dollars in your account were once used for a hooker binge on a ceo's yacht.  right now i have einstein's patent office wages for a 15% commission - or jfk's pulitzer prize winnings for twenty.
winstead:
	winstead think about it, man.  what's that gonna look like when you're eighty?
wintour:
	  anna wintour templed her perfect fingers.  'now,' she hissed, 'we wait.'
wiper:
	mario the secret to avoiding parking tickets is to look like you already have a parking ticket.  he gestures to an envelope marked violation on his windshield.  with an envelope already under your wiper, you can park anywhere you want!
wiping:
	- i'm done living on the freezing streets. i'm done wiping windshields for crack money. and frankly, i'm done with "us." i'm going back to my palatial mansion with my six dozen servants and my cabana boy, julio.
wireless:
	guard  this is the royal jewel vault, not your neighbor's wireless internet.
wiring:
	driver it means that it leaks oil and the wiring is really poorly designed.
wisdom:
	i am grateful for your wisdom.  you have done us both, and our cause, a great service today.
wise:
	a young { flying message courier, student of metaphysics, milquetoast office drone, schlub with mild ocd, farm boy with dreams, techno-obsessed geek, brooding loner, wise-cracking mercenary, idealistic revolutionary, journeyman inventor, collector of oddities, author self-insert
wisecrack:
	lucius  next wisecrack about my hyperbole gets your teeth kicked in.
wisecracks:
	mitchell  the staleness of your wisecracks.
wised:
	you wised up to how he runs around town cheating on you?
wisely:
	324324  alvin chooses wisely
wishful:
	wishful spending trying to maintain some obsolete status quo is like running into the future with one leg tied behind your back!
wispy:
	 floating around, tape measure cing in zero-g like a wispy line of yellow smoke -- that's the stuff
wistful:
	 competing theory wistful trailers will take any excuse to pretend to be helicopters 
withdrawal:
	louie aaahhhhhh   caffeine withdrawal headache
withdrawn:
	marvin first i'll flunk out of college, then i'll marry too young. as i abandon the carefree days of youth for those of ever-increasing responsibility, i'll grow bitter and withdrawn.
withdrew:
	 tooth magazine folded in '89 when advertisers withdrew their support following the publishing of a controversial illustration featuring c. everett koop driving a bulldozer through tianenmen square. the caption 'fluoride uber alles'
withheld:
	148148;  candy is withheld
withhold:
	 withhold satisfaction 
witlibberdey:
	womans 2 inda vizabul witlibberdey annjus tisferol
wits:
	a bespectacled man wits at a writing desk, composing a letter. at his feet is a cat.
witty:
	man 2 yeah, i love witty stickers! "don't steal, the government hates competition!" ha ha ha! you get it?
woah:
	george washington turning away woah, food! when i eat a twinkie it turns into me!
woefully:
	quigley (a dino-turkey) your skills at car repair are woefully inadequate
wok:
	 in the world's largest wok with 800 gallons of canola oil
womans:
	womans 2 inda vizabul witlibberdey annjus tisferol
womb:
	glenn  look!  if you kill a dentist, george will bless your womb with a superhuman baby immune to all known diseases!  why does nobody get this?
womfy:
	charles  no i'm comfy womfy.
wondered:
	 in fact i just noticed it on my way into town and wondered, 'hmm, what a bizarre pile of wrecked carriages and horse skeletons'
wonderfully:
	man wearing a fedora well, then it's wrong.  it's supposed to taste like mud, corn husks, and old milk.  you might think you know better, but guess what?  get over yourself.    not every job is about being wonderfully creative.  sometimes you're just hired to follow a freakin' recipe.
wondermar:
	 believe in wondermar.com
wonnayshun:
	woman 2 don't interrupt me, child!  we are mid-incantation.  wonnayshun un durgahd
wooden:
	pan out to parker and dave doing something involving a ladle and a container inside a wooden frame.
woohoo:
	woohoo!
wool:
	later, craig and wendy sit atop the roof of their mostly-submerged home.  craig has three wool caps on his head, one on his left shoulder and two on his right knee.  wendy is still knitting.
wooo:
	both woooo-woo-woo-wooo!
wooooo:
	fat  wooooo
woooooo:
	marty woooooo
woooooooo:
	milo woooooooo!!
wordy:
	 guessing it pretty much went like this in real life, except with the wordy objection replaced by celebratory back-slapping
wore:
	carlos i do not know why this seems unlikely.  clearly we occupy a universe  it has occurred.  what is the probability that you wore a hat today?  one point zero.  it is certain.
workbench:
	a bespectacled man at his workbench, examining a squid.
workings:
	calvin this was my first book as a boy - filled with vivid descriptions of the workings of the world around us - this is the book that ignited my passion for learning!  for scholarship!  for a lifelong journey of self - and other - discovery!
workplace:
	very affectionate, totally inappropriate for the workplace.  he always wants to sit on my lap while i work!  i should really file a formal complaint with h.r.!
workshops:
	clara and the dvds, and workshops, and seminars...as you know, it's much easier to manipulate the public than the stock market.
workspace:
	a large picture shows a box full of stuff, captioned "why let the detritus of previous failed projects clutter up your workspace and demoralize you? put it away for good." "build a junk box - for all your unifinished projects"
workstation:
	a technician in a lab coat is sitting at a computer workstation.
workweeks:
	 they are not simply 'magically delicious.' as head flavor manager i work 70+ hour workweeks and i do not appreciate kids thinking it just happens by itself
worldly:
	this is zion, o simpleton.  thusly have i christened my sanctuary, my ascetic outpost, which secludes me from all worldly cares.
worldview:
	woman or do you simply take action however you please, rationalizing your worldview into alignment?
worldwide:
	bruce we will need to perform a complex and incredibly expensive musical exorcism.  luckily, i just happen to be in a band!  we can probably squeeze you in between our incredibly important gigs in the courts of popes worldwide
worm:
	jeff if only i could speak the name of the beast, i might rebuke her.  but its alien syllables slither past my tongue like a soapy worm.
worms:
	brian don't bite stray worms or you may end up horribly trapped forever
worrisome:
	 these real life comics are starting to get kind of worrisome
worship:
	james this is just another trick to try and get me to worship ants
worshippers:
	wolf i'm a wolf now, dude! come join me! leave the upright world to the money-worshippers and run free in the tundra!
wotta:
	wotta prank
woulda:
	i think he woulda guessed it in two.
wound:
	cynthia my dress has pressed itself firmly into the voids in the wicker seat-backs.  my stockings have wound themselves about the chair-legs.  even the ribbons in my shoes have drilled deep into the earth at my feet.  i don't imagine i'll be leaving for a while, if ever.  you may wish to come back in twenty years to sit in my shade.  bring a picnic.
wounding:
	  you are really wounding me with how inconsiderate you're being.  also, with your arrows
wowzers:
	skippy  wowzers.  by not turning your neck six inches you are missing something remarkable.
wrapped:
	 he had also wrapped himself in a bath towel but that had somehow fallen into the toilet and clogged it.  oh i'm sorry am i disgusting you with tales of your grandfather's toilet misadventure, children??
wrath:
	no mention of honesty or charity.  morality is simply a tactic to avoid santa's wrath!
wreck:
	if he said anything, he'd wreck it.
wrested:
	022022;  control is wrested
wrestled:
	man with monocle and top hat ...and the tumor was this big!  he literally only had seconds to live.  so, like any good doctor would, i pointed to the sky and yelled "hey, tumor, look at that" and then wrestled that damn neoplasm to the ground!  and...then...
wrestlers:
	a japanese father sits before a quartet of sumo wrestlers.  a son, dressed in traditional japanese robes, approaches.
wrestling:
	men in each other's arms, dancing fiercely, perhaps even wrestling
wrinkled:
	 if my toenails became little tiny buck teeth, and the wrinkled skin on each knuckle twisted to become a series of sinister little pointed faces?
wrist:
	the doctor is leaning over tommy, who's lying on a sickbed, and is holding tommy's wrist.
writer:
	clara oh, barbara!  james is a writer!  look at him create from his brain!  i wonder what he's writing!  something about me, probably!
writers:
	lazy writers who explain everything with "quantum theory."
writhing:
	paul the belmont answer-eel, writhing in these very hands!
writin:
	man 2 sorry, dude, better stick to the traditional method.   writin' angry letters claimin' you found pubes in the o. j.
wrongs:
	white  wrongs were done. mistakes were made. but that was generations ago - you can't hold all white people responsible.
wrung:
	skip nothing worse, right?  cramped space, uncomfortable seats, and some little rugrat just screaming bloody murder like it's a washcloth being wrung out.   well, my invention is a special hood that fits securely around the baby's upper region to effectively muffle any disruptive noises that might disturb fellow passengers.
wurtzenberger:
	dale  wurtzenberger!  wurtzenfeld!  lord chaddenstock von wurtzlemania the tenth earl of chadwurtzville!
wurtzenfeld:
	dale  wurtzenberger!  wurtzenfeld!  lord chaddenstock von wurtzlemania the tenth earl of chadwurtzville!
wurtzlemania:
	dale  wurtzenberger!  wurtzenfeld!  lord chaddenstock von wurtzlemania the tenth earl of chadwurtzville!
wuthering:
	 president garfield was about 15 when wuthering heights was published
wuzzy:
	huh? huh? who's my little fuzzy-wuzzy?
wwi:
	 not pictured wwi-era german officers in pointy helmets, fakirs, stripes-wearing prisoners complete with shackles and iron balls, larry flynt
xanga:
	 it's not even blogger or typepad, it's some crap like xanga
xenophobic:
	amy  "although basic courtesy doesn't explain foreign genocide, highly-intuitive japanese kids let machines narrate old people's quiet recollections, seeking to ultimately vanquish wichita's xenophobic young zealots."
xerxes:
	xerxes studies the puzzle and clues long and hard.
xiao:
	can he do it?  can he top the performance of china's xiao fei shin at last year's international championships?
yaaaayyyyy:
	kids yaaaayyyyy
yacht:
	otto redeeming it.  [to dave]  ah, yes.  looks like these dollars in your account were once used for a hooker binge on a ceo's yacht.  right now i have einstein's patent office wages for a 15% commission - or jfk's pulitzer prize winnings for twenty.
yahoo:
	jimbo well, we're in a bit of a bind.  some yahoo threw in a rookie and how our columns don't quite balance. ...yeah, it was 31.  i didn't want to say anything, he's still prime and all.  but it's a bit of a fiasco.
yammering:
	jimmy you see, all human language is descended from a mother, animal tongue.  to the beasts, our yammering, overenunciated dialects sound like so much chittering gibberish!
yanking:
	- you seem to be yanking on zat rope kind of hard.
yanks:
	jeff yanks his arm free, but the flesh has already been dissolved from the bones.
yapping:
	- hey! what's so funny, huh? can't a guy take a shower in peace without allyou yapping away?
yardeyardeyaryar:
	 cheaplaugh manor is on piddlepaddle lane at the intersection of whoopydoo and yardeyardeyaryar
yards:
	yorick sure.  take this road to the highway, then in about two miles take the exit for 'riverside.'  the sign says left, but you want to go right.  about a hundred yards.  you can't miss it.
yarn:
	craig  is there anything else in the emergency survival kit besides knitting needles and yarn?
yarrrggh:
	gentle sonuva yarrrggh
yawning:
	babs he looked tired.  he was yawning.
yay:
	- 'cause the thing is, i got married!  yay me, right? / still so excited you guys
yearn:
	 yearn 
yee:
	dwight yee-haw!  i'll never tell you where i hid that gold!
yeeaahh:
	- yeeaahh!!!
yell:
	- sometimes i overstock my cart just to make her yell at me... her cries of desperate futility are so hot.
yellowed:
	 the legends come down to us in yellowed fur-trappers'  journals...in shaky rough-hewn script, scrawled by fading candlelight, a single penciled word 'awesome.'
yellowstone:
	julio sure i did!  last march?  we went to yellowstone?
yells:
	 the candidates debate. there's a light that blinks yellow three times and then turns green. at the green, whoever yells ''jobs'' the loudest becomes president.
yeshua:
	jesus umm, maybe try yeshua bin yousef?
yesss:
	todd yesss
yessssssss:
	 wrote this comic first, then went looking for images...found this one right away and was all like 'yessssssss'
yield:
	marvin my resentful attitude toward fatherhood will yield spiteful and maladjusted children. on my deathbed, i will plead with them for reconciliation. to no avail.
yielded:
	husband "its first bowel movement yielded 400 grams of excretum, having the viscosity of warm butter."
yoke:
	left ladies, have you heard? bifton's out! he's thrown the yoke and drawn a dusty soda!
yolk:
	simon, who will...  free-range hen eggs delicately cracked into a porcelain bowl, the yolk and albumen whipped until smooth with a silver whisk, then seared on a steaming griddle until golden and fluffy.
yonder:
	cap'n pegwood well, bobby, looks like land ho over yonder.
yooneye:
	woman 2 ayplej ahleejanz tooda flahg uvdaa yooneye teydstay tsava merraka
yosemite:
	babs it was april, and it was yosemite.
yougurts:
	stavros  for me it would be mediterreanean olives, yougurts, figs and dates!
youngster:
	old ant youngster! i won't brook your sass any longer! i don't know when respect went out of fashion in today's society! 
yourselllves:
	rob (leaning even closer)  saaaaave yourselllves
youth:
	marvin first i'll flunk out of college, then i'll marry too young. as i abandon the carefree days of youth for those of ever-increasing responsibility, i'll grow bitter and withdrawn.
yuh:
	- dih yuh sah tryyih tah cahstahpay?
yukster:
	 taft was a well-known yukster but jimmy here would cause the most awkward of silences at all the state dinners
yum:
	nora what?  did you spill it?  did you burn your central intelligence agency?  should we be expecting some sort of cash payout from yum! brands, inc.?
yyyeessss:
	 sssayyyy yyyeessss
zacatecanos:
	student we sing songs about how mexicans are lazy, kids go to mexicans-are-lazy camp, there's all this ritual chanting...  but now is a tough time.  recently the church splity into factions - my group thinks zacatecanos are the laziest, but some crazy nutjobs think it's oaxacans. what a bunch of idiots!
zach:
	mabel  or we could wait five more minutes for zach to arrive with our spare keys.
zachary:
	- my zachary taylor washingtoy▢!
zagat:
	 optionally, they can be prepared drizzled with artisanal peppercorn shavings, or sprinkled with crushed crystalline minerals.  zagat take notice
zapf:
	  in her defense, the fine print is tiny and in zapf dingbats.
zat:
	- you seem to be yanking on zat rope kind of hard.
zazzle:
	"i follow him on twitter and once got an @ reply when i found a typo on one of his zazzle shirts"
zealots:
	amy  "although basic courtesy doesn't explain foreign genocide, highly-intuitive japanese kids let machines narrate old people's quiet recollections, seeking to ultimately vanquish wichita's xenophobic young zealots."
zebra:
	wife also write one for the zebra insurance.
zeke:
	animated terry's puppet attacks zeke's leg in frustration.
zeppelin:
	 alternately, it is a zeppelin full of rancid milk
zeppelins:
	biff ...and i've also converted all of my zeppelins to run on earwax.
zimbabwean:
	two gentlemen, armand and joe, are visiting a destitute zimbabwean village.
zimbabweans:
	joe look at these zimbabweans.  living without electricity.  hunting mice for food.  dying at thirty-seven.
zippers:
	lawyer and millions of people use these dangerous zippers every day! the potential for serious injury is staggering.
zipping:
	andy so it's like zipping a file for email?
zits:
	- so many zits!
zooms:
	the panel zooms out to reveal several people sitting in a theater, of which two women are the focus, watching the previous scenes from a movie or play.  cynthia is seen burning people in the background.
zzzt:
	fly bzz zzz zzzt zzzzt zz zzz zzzz z zzzz zz!
zzzzt:
	fly bzz zzz zzzt zzzzt zz zzz zzzz z zzzz zz!
zzzzzzz:
	elizabeth ...zzzzzzz